Johari Window Questionnaire
Johari Window Questionnaire
Johari Window Questionnaire
Name:-
Email:-
Responses Questions
1) If a friend of mine had a "personality conflict" with a mutual acquaintance of ours with whom it
was important for him/her to get along, I would:
0 A. Tell my friend that I felt s/he was partially responsible for any problems with this
other person and try to let him/her know how the person was being affected by
him/her.
B. Not get involved because I wouldn't be able to continue to get along with both of
them once I had entered in any way.
2) If one of my friends and I had a heated argument in the past and I realized that s/he was ill at ease
around me from that time on, I would:
A. Avoid making things worse by discussing his/her behavior and just let the whole
thing drop.
B. Bring up his/her behavior and ask him/her how s/he felt the argument had affected
our relationship.
3) If a friend began to avoid me and act in an aloof and withdrawn manner, I would:
A. Tell him/her about his/her behavior and suggest that s/he tell me what was on his/her
mind.
B. Follow his/her lead and keep our contact brief and aloof since that seems to be what
s/he wants.
4) If two of my friends and I were talking and one of my friends slipped and brought up a personal
problem of mine that involved the other friend, of which s/he was not yet aware, I would:
5) If a friend of mine were to tell me that, in his/her opinion, I was doing things that made me less
effective than I might be in social situations, I would:
A. Ask him/her to spell out or describe what s/he has observed and suggest changes I
might make.
B. Resent his/her criticism and let him/her know why I behave the way I do.
6) If one of my friends aspired to an office in our organization for which I felt s/he was unqualified,
and if s/he had been tentatively assigned to that position by the leader of our group, I would:
A. Not mention my misgivings to either my friend or the leader of our group and let
them handle it in their own way.
B. Tell my friend and the leader of our group of my misgivings and then leave the final
decision up to them.
7) If I felt that one of my friends was being unfair to me and his/her other friends, but none of them
had mentioned anything about it, I would:
A. Ask several of these people how they perceived the situation to see if they felt s/he
was being unfair.
B. Not ask the others how they perceived our friend, but wait for them to bring it up with
me.
8) If I were preoccupied with some personal matters and a friend told me that I had become irritated
with him/her and others and that I was jumping on him/her for unimportant things, I would:
A. Tell him/her I was preoccupied and would probably be on edge for a while and would
prefer not to be bothered.
B. Listen to his/her complaints but not try to explain my actions to him/her.
9) If I had heard some friends discussing an ugly rumor about a friend of mine which I knew could
hurt him/her and s/he asked me what I knew about it, if anything, I would:
A. Say I didn't know anything about it and tell him/her no one would believe a rumor
like that anyway.
B. Tell him/her exactly what I had heard, when I had heard it, and from whom I had
heard it.
10) If a friend pointed out the fact that I had a personality conflict with another friend with whom it
was important for me to get along, I would:
A. Consider his/her comments out of line and tell him/her I didn't want to discuss the
matter any further.
B. Talk about it openly with him/her to find out how my behavior was being affected by
this.
11) If my relationship with a friend has been damaged by repeated arguments on an issue of
importance to us both, I would:
A. Be cautious in my conversations with him/her so the issue would not come up again
to worsen our relationship.
B. Point to the problems the controversy was causing in our relationship and suggest that
we discuss it until we get it resolved.
12) If in a personal discussion with a friend about his/her problems and behavior s/he suddenly
suggested we discuss my problems and behavior as well as his/her own, I would:
A. Try to keep the discussion away from me by suggesting that other, closer friends
often talked to me about such matters.
B. Welcome the opportunity to hear what s/he felt about me and encourage his/her
comments.
13) If a friend of mine began to tell me about his/her hostile feelings about another friend whom s/he
felt was being unkind to others (and I agreed wholeheartedly), I would:
A. Listen and also express my own feelings to me/her so s/he would know where I
stood.
B. Listen, but not express my own negative views and opinion because s/he might repeat
what I said to him/her in confidence.
14) If I thought an ugly rumor was being spread about me and suspected that one of my friends had
quite likely heard it, I would:
A. Avoid mentioning the issue and leave it to him/her to tell me about it if s/he wanted
to.
B. Risk putting him/her on the spot by asking him/her directly what s/he knew about the
whole thing.
15) If I had observed a friend in social situations and thought that s/he was doing a number of things
which hurt his/her relationships, I would:
A. Risk being seen as a busy body and tell him/her what I had observed and my
reactions to it.
B. Keep my opinion to myself rather than be seen as interfering in things that are none
of my business.
16) If two friends and I were talking and one of them inadvertently mentioned a personal problem
which involved me, but of which I knew nothing, I would:
A. Press them for information about the problem and their opinions about it.
B. Leave it up to my friends to tell me or not tell me, letting them change the subject if
they wished.
17) If a friend seemed to be preoccupied and began to jump on me for seemingly unimportant things,
and became irritated with me and others without real cause, I would:
A. Treat him/her with kid gloves for awhile on the assumption that s/he was having
some temporary personal problems which were none of my business.
B. Try to talk to him/her about it and point out to him/her how his/her behavior was
affecting people.
18) If I had begun to dislike certain habits of a friend to the point that it was interfering with my
enjoying his/her company, I would:
A. Say nothing to him/her directly, but let him/her know my feelings by ignoring
him/her whenever his/her annoying habits were obvious.
B. Get my feelings out in the open and clear the air so that we could continue our
friendship comfortably and enjoyably.
19) In discussing social behavior with one of my more sensitive friends, I would:
A. Avoid mentioning his/her flaws and weaknesses so as not to hurt his/her feelings.
B. Focus on his/her flaws and weaknesses so s/he could improve his/her interpersonal
skills.
20) If I knew I might be assigned to an important position in our group and my friends' attitudes toward
me had become rather negative, I would:
th this
by
both of
whole
d affected
would:
as on his/her
to be what
brought up a personal
ware, I would:
suggest
changes I
s/he was unqualified,
r group, I would:
and let
the final
y felt s/he
ng it up with
and would
a rumor
m I had
scuss the
affected by
ts on an issue of
e up again
suggest that
vior s/he suddenly
uld:
riends
his/her
here I
might repeat
he wanted
w about the
my
are none
d a personal problem
subject if
having
vior was
nterfering with my
ing
e our
uld:
eelings.
rpersonal
Responses Questions
1) If a friend of mine had a "personality conflict" with a mutual acquaintance of ours with whom it
was important for him/her to get along, I would:
A. Tell my friend that I felt s/he was partially responsible for any problems with this
other person and try to let him/her know how the person was being affected by
him/her.
B. Not get involved because I wouldn't be able to continue to get along with both of
them once I had entered in any way.
2) If one of my friends and I had a heated argument in the past and I realized that s/he was ill at ease
around me from that time on, I would:
A. Avoid making things worse by discussing his/her behavior and just let the whole
thing drop.
B. Bring up his/her behavior and ask him/her how s/he felt the argument had affected
our relationship.
3) If a friend began to avoid me and act in an aloof and withdrawn manner, I would:
A. Tell him/her about his/her behavior and suggest that s/he tell me what was on his/her
mind.
B. Follow his/her lead and keep our contact brief and aloof since that seems to be what
s/he wants.
4) If two of my friends and I were talking and one of my friends slipped and brought up a personal
problem of mine that involved the other friend, of which s/he was not yet aware, I would:
5) If a friend of mine were to tell me that, in his/her opinion, I was doing things that made me less
effective than I might be in social situations, I would:
A. Ask him/her to spell out or describe what s/he has observed and suggest changes I
might make.
B. Resent his/her criticism and let him/her know why I behave the way I do.
6) If one of my friends aspired to an office in our organization for which I felt s/he was unqualified,
and if s/he had been tentatively assigned to that position by the leader of our group, I would:
A. Not mention my misgivings to either my friend or the leader of our group and let
them handle it in their own way.
B. Tell my friend and the leader of our group of my misgivings and then leave the final
decision up to them.
7) If I felt that one of my friends was being unfair to me and his/her other friends, but none of them
had mentioned anything about it, I would:
A. Ask several of these people how they perceived the situation to see if they felt s/he
was being unfair.
B. Not ask the others how they perceived our friend, but wait for them to bring it up with
me.
8) If I were preoccupied with some personal matters and a friend told me that I had become irritated
with him/her and others and that I was jumping on him/her for unimportant things, I would:
A. Tell him/her I was preoccupied and would probably be on edge for a while and would
prefer not to be bothered.
B. Listen to his/her complaints but not try to explain my actions to him/her.
9) If I had heard some friends discussing an ugly rumor about a friend of mine which I knew could
hurt him/her and s/he asked me what I knew about it, if anything, I would:
A. Say I didn't know anything about it and tell him/her no one would believe a rumor
like that anyway.
B. Tell him/her exactly what I had heard, when I had heard it, and from whom I had
heard it.
10) If a friend pointed out the fact that I had a personality conflict with another friend with whom it
was important for me to get along, I would:
A. Consider his/her comments out of line and tell him/her I didn't want to discuss the
matter any further.
B. Talk about it openly with him/her to find out how my behavior was being affected by
this.
11) If my relationship with a friend has been damaged by repeated arguments on an issue of
importance to us both, I would:
A. Be cautious in my conversations with him/her so the issue would not come up again
to worsen our relationship.
B. Point to the problems the controversy was causing in our relationship and suggest that
we discuss it until we get it resolved.
12) If in a personal discussion with a friend about his/her problems and behavior s/he suddenly
suggested we discuss my problems and behavior as well as his/her own, I would:
A. Try to keep the discussion away from me by suggesting that other, closer friends
often talked to me about such matters.
B. Welcome the opportunity to hear what s/he felt about me and encourage his/her
comments.
13) If a friend of mine began to tell me about his/her hostile feelings about another friend whom s/he
felt was being unkind to others (and I agreed wholeheartedly), I would:
A. Listen and also express my own feelings to me/her so s/he would know where I
stood.
B. Listen, but not express my own negative views and opinion because s/he might repeat
what I said to him/her in confidence.
14) If I thought an ugly rumor was being spread about me and suspected that one of my friends had
quite likely heard it, I would:
A. Avoid mentioning the issue and leave it to him/her to tell me about it if s/he wanted
to.
B. Risk putting him/her on the spot by asking him/her directly what s/he knew about the
whole thing.
15) If I had observed a friend in social situations and thought that s/he was doing a number of things
which hurt his/her relationships, I would:
A. Risk being seen as a busy body and tell him/her what I had observed and my
reactions to it.
B. Keep my opinion to myself rather than be seen as interfering in things that are none
of my business.
16) If two friends and I were talking and one of them inadvertently mentioned a personal problem
which involved me, but of which I knew nothing, I would:
A. Press them for information about the problem and their opinions about it.
B. Leave it up to my friends to tell me or not tell me, letting them change the subject if
they wished.
17) If a friend seemed to be preoccupied and began to jump on me for seemingly unimportant things,
and became irritated with me and others without real cause, I would:
A. Treat him/her with kid gloves for awhile on the assumption that s/he was having
some temporary personal problems which were none of my business.
B. Try to talk to him/her about it and point out to him/her how his/her behavior was
affecting people.
18) If I had begun to dislike certain habits of a friend to the point that it was interfering with my
enjoying his/her company, I would:
A. Say nothing to him/her directly, but let him/her know my feelings by ignoring
him/her whenever his/her annoying habits were obvious.
B. Get my feelings out in the open and clear the air so that we could continue our
friendship comfortably and enjoyably.
19) In discussing social behavior with one of my more sensitive friends, I would:
A. Avoid mentioning his/her flaws and weaknesses so as not to hurt his/her feelings.
B. Focus on his/her flaws and weaknesses so s/he could improve his/her interpersonal
skills.
20) If I knew I might be assigned to an important position in our group and my friends' attitudes toward
me had become rather negative, I would:
th this
by
both of
whole
d affected
would:
as on his/her
to be what
brought up a personal
ware, I would:
suggest
changes I
s/he was unqualified,
r group, I would:
and let
the final
y felt s/he
ng it up with
and would
a rumor
m I had
scuss the
affected by
ts on an issue of
e up again
suggest that
vior s/he suddenly
uld:
riends
his/her
here I
might repeat
he wanted
w about the
my
are none
d a personal problem
subject if
having
vior was
nterfering with my
ing
e our
uld:
eelings.
rpersonal
Responses Questions
1) If a friend of mine had a "personality conflict" with a mutual acquaintance of ours with w
was important for him/her to get along, I would:
3 A. Tell my friend that I felt s/he was partially responsible for any problems with this
other person and try to let him/her know how the person was being affected by
him/her.
2 B. Not get involved because I wouldn't be able to continue to get along with both of
them once I had entered in any way.
2) If one of my friends and I had a heated argument in the past and I realized that s/he was
around me from that time on, I would:
2 A. Avoid making things worse by discussing his/her behavior and just let the whole
thing drop.
3 B. Bring up his/her behavior and ask him/her how s/he felt the argument had affected
our relationship.
3) If a friend began to avoid me and act in an aloof and withdrawn manner, I would:
4 A. Tell him/her about his/her behavior and suggest that s/he tell me what was on his/her
mind.
1 B. Follow his/her lead and keep our contact brief and aloof since that seems to be what
s/he wants.
4) If two of my friends and I were talking and one of my friends slipped and brought up a pe
problem of mine that involved the other friend, of which s/he was not yet aware, I would:
5) If a friend of mine were to tell me that, in his/her opinion, I was doing things that made m
effective than I might be in social situations, I would:
5 A. Ask him/her to spell out or describe what s/he has observed and suggest changes I
might make.
B. Resent his/her criticism and let him/her know why I behave the way I do.
6) If one of my friends aspired to an office in our organization for which I felt s/he was unqu
and if s/he had been tentatively assigned to that position by the leader of our group, I woul
4 A. Not mention my misgivings to either my friend or the leader of our group and let
them handle it in their own way.
1 B. Tell my friend and the leader of our group of my misgivings and then leave the final
decision up to them.
7) If I felt that one of my friends was being unfair to me and his/her other friends, but none
had mentioned anything about it, I would:
2 A. Ask several of these people how they perceived the situation to see if they felt s/he
was being unfair.
3 B. Not ask the others how they perceived our friend, but wait for them to bring it up with
me.
8) If I were preoccupied with some personal matters and a friend told me that I had becom
with him/her and others and that I was jumping on him/her for unimportant things, I would
5 A. Tell him/her I was preoccupied and would probably be on edge for a while and would
prefer not to be bothered.
0 B. Listen to his/her complaints but not try to explain my actions to him/her.
9) If I had heard some friends discussing an ugly rumor about a friend of mine which I knew
hurt him/her and s/he asked me what I knew about it, if anything, I would:
5 A. Say I didn't know anything about it and tell him/her no one would believe a rumor
like that anyway.
0 B. Tell him/her exactly what I had heard, when I had heard it, and from whom I had
heard it.
10) If a friend pointed out the fact that I had a personality conflict with another friend with
was important for me to get along, I would:
0 A. Consider his/her comments out of line and tell him/her I didn't want to discuss the
matter any further.
5 B. Talk about it openly with him/her to find out how my behavior was being affected by
this.
11) If my relationship with a friend has been damaged by repeated arguments on an issue o
importance to us both, I would:
5 A. Be cautious in my conversations with him/her so the issue would not come up again
to worsen our relationship.
0 B. Point to the problems the controversy was causing in our relationship and suggest that
we discuss it until we get it resolved.
12) If in a personal discussion with a friend about his/her problems and behavior s/he sudd
suggested we discuss my problems and behavior as well as his/her own, I would:
0 A. Try to keep the discussion away from me by suggesting that other, closer friends
0 often talked to me about such matters.
5 B. Welcome the opportunity to hear what s/he felt about me and encourage his/her
comments.
13) If a friend of mine began to tell me about his/her hostile feelings about another friend w
felt was being unkind to others (and I agreed wholeheartedly), I would:
1 A. Listen and also express my own feelings to me/her so s/he would know where I
stood.
4 B. Listen, but not express my own negative views and opinion because s/he might repeat
what I said to him/her in confidence.
14) If I thought an ugly rumor was being spread about me and suspected that one of my fri
quite likely heard it, I would:
A. Avoid mentioning the issue and leave it to him/her to tell me about it if s/he wanted
to.
5 B. Risk putting him/her on the spot by asking him/her directly what s/he knew about the
whole thing.
15) If I had observed a friend in social situations and thought that s/he was doing a number
which hurt his/her relationships, I would:
4 A. Risk being seen as a busy body and tell him/her what I had observed and my
reactions to it.
1 B. Keep my opinion to myself rather than be seen as interfering in things that are none
of my business.
16) If two friends and I were talking and one of them inadvertently mentioned a personal p
which involved me, but of which I knew nothing, I would:
3 A. Press them for information about the problem and their opinions about it.
2 B. Leave it up to my friends to tell me or not tell me, letting them change the subject if
they wished.
17) If a friend seemed to be preoccupied and began to jump on me for seemingly unimport
and became irritated with me and others without real cause, I would:
2 A. Treat him/her with kid gloves for awhile on the assumption that s/he was having
some temporary personal problems which were none of my business.
3 B. Try to talk to him/her about it and point out to him/her how his/her behavior was
affecting people.
18) If I had begun to dislike certain habits of a friend to the point that it was interfering with
enjoying his/her company, I would:
1 A. Say nothing to him/her directly, but let him/her know my feelings by ignoring
him/her whenever his/her annoying habits were obvious.
4 B. Get my feelings out in the open and clear the air so that we could continue our
friendship comfortably and enjoyably.
19) In discussing social behavior with one of my more sensitive friends, I would:
4 A. Avoid mentioning his/her flaws and weaknesses so as not to hurt his/her feelings.
1 B. Focus on his/her flaws and weaknesses so s/he could improve his/her interpersonal
skills.
20) If I knew I might be assigned to an important position in our group and my friends' attit
me had become rather negative, I would:
tions to him/her.
ad observed and my
y feelings by ignoring
where to improve.
uld improve.
0
1
2
3
4
5
Responses Questions
1) If a friend of mine had a "personality conflict" with a mutual acquaintance of ours with whom it
was important for him/her to get along, I would:
5 A. Tell my friend that I felt s/he was partially responsible for any problems with this
other person and try to let him/her know how the person was being affected by
him/her.
0 B. Not get involved because I wouldn't be able to continue to get along with both of
them once I had entered in any way.
2) If one of my friends and I had a heated argument in the past and I realized that s/he was ill at ease
around me from that time on, I would:
1 A. Avoid making things worse by discussing his/her behavior and just let the whole
thing drop.
4 B. Bring up his/her behavior and ask him/her how s/he felt the argument had affected
our relationship.
3) If a friend began to avoid me and act in an aloof and withdrawn manner, I would:
5 A. Tell him/her about his/her behavior and suggest that s/he tell me what was on his/her
mind.
0 B. Follow his/her lead and keep our contact brief and aloof since that seems to be what
s/he wants.
4) If two of my friends and I were talking and one of my friends slipped and brought up a personal
problem of mine that involved the other friend, of which s/he was not yet aware, I would:
5) If a friend of mine were to tell me that, in his/her opinion, I was doing things that made me less
effective than I might be in social situations, I would:
5 A. Ask him/her to spell out or describe what s/he has observed and suggest changes I
might make.
0 B. Resent his/her criticism and let him/her know why I behave the way I do.
6) If one of my friends aspired to an office in our organization for which I felt s/he was unqualified,
and if s/he had been tentatively assigned to that position by the leader of our group, I would:
2 A. Not mention my misgivings to either my friend or the leader of our group and let
them handle it in their own way.
3 B. Tell my friend and the leader of our group of my misgivings and then leave the final
decision up to them.
7) If I felt that one of my friends was being unfair to me and his/her other friends, but none of them
had mentioned anything about it, I would:
3 A. Ask several of these people how they perceived the situation to see if they felt s/he
was being unfair.
2 B. Not ask the others how they perceived our friend, but wait for them to bring it up with
me.
8) If I were preoccupied with some personal matters and a friend told me that I had become irritated
with him/her and others and that I was jumping on him/her for unimportant things, I would:
2 A. Tell him/her I was preoccupied and would probably be on edge for a while and would
prefer not to be bothered.
3 B. Listen to his/her complaints but not try to explain my actions to him/her.
9) If I had heard some friends discussing an ugly rumor about a friend of mine which I knew could
hurt him/her and s/he asked me what I knew about it, if anything, I would:
1 A. Say I didn't know anything about it and tell him/her no one would believe a rumor
like that anyway.
4 B. Tell him/her exactly what I had heard, when I had heard it, and from whom I had
heard it.
10) If a friend pointed out the fact that I had a personality conflict with another friend with whom it
was important for me to get along, I would:
2 A. Consider his/her comments out of line and tell him/her I didn't want to discuss the
matter any further.
3 B. Talk about it openly with him/her to find out how my behavior was being affected by
this.
11) If my relationship with a friend has been damaged by repeated arguments on an issue of
importance to us both, I would:
1 A. Be cautious in my conversations with him/her so the issue would not come up again
to worsen our relationship.
4 B. Point to the problems the controversy was causing in our relationship and suggest that
we discuss it until we get it resolved.
12) If in a personal discussion with a friend about his/her problems and behavior s/he suddenly
suggested we discuss my problems and behavior as well as his/her own, I would:
1 A. Try to keep the discussion away from me by suggesting that other, closer friends
often talked to me about such matters.
4 B. Welcome the opportunity to hear what s/he felt about me and encourage his/her
comments.
13) If a friend of mine began to tell me about his/her hostile feelings about another friend whom s/he
felt was being unkind to others (and I agreed wholeheartedly), I would:
2 A. Listen and also express my own feelings to me/her so s/he would know where I
stood.
3 B. Listen, but not express my own negative views and opinion because s/he might repeat
what I said to him/her in confidence.
14) If I thought an ugly rumor was being spread about me and suspected that one of my friends had
quite likely heard it, I would:
1 A. Avoid mentioning the issue and leave it to him/her to tell me about it if s/he wanted
to.
4 B. Risk putting him/her on the spot by asking him/her directly what s/he knew about the
whole thing.
15) If I had observed a friend in social situations and thought that s/he was doing a number of things
which hurt his/her relationships, I would:
5 A. Risk being seen as a busy body and tell him/her what I had observed and my
reactions to it.
0 B. Keep my opinion to myself rather than be seen as interfering in things that are none
of my business.
16) If two friends and I were talking and one of them inadvertently mentioned a personal problem
which involved me, but of which I knew nothing, I would:
2 A. Press them for information about the problem and their opinions about it.
3 B. Leave it up to my friends to tell me or not tell me, letting them change the subject if
they wished.
17) If a friend seemed to be preoccupied and began to jump on me for seemingly unimportant things,
and became irritated with me and others without real cause, I would:
1 A. Treat him/her with kid gloves for awhile on the assumption that s/he was having
some temporary personal problems which were none of my business.
4 B. Try to talk to him/her about it and point out to him/her how his/her behavior was
affecting people.
18) If I had begun to dislike certain habits of a friend to the point that it was interfering with my
enjoying his/her company, I would:
0 A. Say nothing to him/her directly, but let him/her know my feelings by ignoring
him/her whenever his/her annoying habits were obvious.
5 B. Get my feelings out in the open and clear the air so that we could continue our
friendship comfortably and enjoyably.
19) In discussing social behavior with one of my more sensitive friends, I would:
0 A. Avoid mentioning his/her flaws and weaknesses so as not to hurt his/her feelings.
5 B. Focus on his/her flaws and weaknesses so s/he could improve his/her interpersonal
skills.
20) If I knew I might be assigned to an important position in our group and my friends' attitudes toward
me had become rather negative, I would:
th this
by
both of
whole
d affected
would:
as on his/her
to be what
brought up a personal
ware, I would:
suggest
changes I
s/he was unqualified,
r group, I would:
and let
the final
y felt s/he
ng it up with
and would
a rumor
m I had
scuss the
affected by
ts on an issue of
e up again
suggest that
vior s/he suddenly
uld:
riends
his/her
here I
might repeat
he wanted
w about the
my
are none
d a personal problem
subject if
having
vior was
nterfering with my
ing
e our
uld:
eelings.
rpersonal
Responses Questions
1) If a friend of mine had a "personality conflict" with a mutual acquaintance of ours with whom it
was important for him/her to get along, I would:
A. Tell my friend that I felt s/he was partially responsible for any problems with this
other person and try to let him/her know how the person was being affected by
him/her.
B. Not get involved because I wouldn't be able to continue to get along with both of
them once I had entered in any way.
2) If one of my friends and I had a heated argument in the past and I realized that s/he was ill at ease
around me from that time on, I would:
A. Avoid making things worse by discussing his/her behavior and just let the whole
thing drop.
B. Bring up his/her behavior and ask him/her how s/he felt the argument had affected
our relationship.
3) If a friend began to avoid me and act in an aloof and withdrawn manner, I would:
A. Tell him/her about his/her behavior and suggest that s/he tell me what was on his/her
mind.
B. Follow his/her lead and keep our contact brief and aloof since that seems to be what
s/he wants.
4) If two of my friends and I were talking and one of my friends slipped and brought up a personal
problem of mine that involved the other friend, of which s/he was not yet aware, I would:
5) If a friend of mine were to tell me that, in his/her opinion, I was doing things that made me less
effective than I might be in social situations, I would:
A. Ask him/her to spell out or describe what s/he has observed and suggest changes I
might make.
B. Resent his/her criticism and let him/her know why I behave the way I do.
6) If one of my friends aspired to an office in our organization for which I felt s/he was unqualified,
and if s/he had been tentatively assigned to that position by the leader of our group, I would:
A. Not mention my misgivings to either my friend or the leader of our group and let
them handle it in their own way.
B. Tell my friend and the leader of our group of my misgivings and then leave the final
decision up to them.
7) If I felt that one of my friends was being unfair to me and his/her other friends, but none of them
had mentioned anything about it, I would:
A. Ask several of these people how they perceived the situation to see if they felt s/he
was being unfair.
B. Not ask the others how they perceived our friend, but wait for them to bring it up with
me.
8) If I were preoccupied with some personal matters and a friend told me that I had become irritated
with him/her and others and that I was jumping on him/her for unimportant things, I would:
A. Tell him/her I was preoccupied and would probably be on edge for a while and would
prefer not to be bothered.
B. Listen to his/her complaints but not try to explain my actions to him/her.
9) If I had heard some friends discussing an ugly rumor about a friend of mine which I knew could
hurt him/her and s/he asked me what I knew about it, if anything, I would:
A. Say I didn't know anything about it and tell him/her no one would believe a rumor
like that anyway.
B. Tell him/her exactly what I had heard, when I had heard it, and from whom I had
heard it.
10) If a friend pointed out the fact that I had a personality conflict with another friend with whom it
was important for me to get along, I would:
A. Consider his/her comments out of line and tell him/her I didn't want to discuss the
matter any further.
B. Talk about it openly with him/her to find out how my behavior was being affected by
this.
11) If my relationship with a friend has been damaged by repeated arguments on an issue of
importance to us both, I would:
A. Be cautious in my conversations with him/her so the issue would not come up again
to worsen our relationship.
B. Point to the problems the controversy was causing in our relationship and suggest that
we discuss it until we get it resolved.
12) If in a personal discussion with a friend about his/her problems and behavior s/he suddenly
suggested we discuss my problems and behavior as well as his/her own, I would:
A. Try to keep the discussion away from me by suggesting that other, closer friends
often talked to me about such matters.
B. Welcome the opportunity to hear what s/he felt about me and encourage his/her
comments.
13) If a friend of mine began to tell me about his/her hostile feelings about another friend whom s/he
felt was being unkind to others (and I agreed wholeheartedly), I would:
A. Listen and also express my own feelings to me/her so s/he would know where I
stood.
B. Listen, but not express my own negative views and opinion because s/he might repeat
what I said to him/her in confidence.
14) If I thought an ugly rumor was being spread about me and suspected that one of my friends had
quite likely heard it, I would:
A. Avoid mentioning the issue and leave it to him/her to tell me about it if s/he wanted
to.
B. Risk putting him/her on the spot by asking him/her directly what s/he knew about the
whole thing.
15) If I had observed a friend in social situations and thought that s/he was doing a number of things
which hurt his/her relationships, I would:
A. Risk being seen as a busy body and tell him/her what I had observed and my
reactions to it.
B. Keep my opinion to myself rather than be seen as interfering in things that are none
of my business.
16) If two friends and I were talking and one of them inadvertently mentioned a personal problem
which involved me, but of which I knew nothing, I would:
A. Press them for information about the problem and their opinions about it.
B. Leave it up to my friends to tell me or not tell me, letting them change the subject if
they wished.
17) If a friend seemed to be preoccupied and began to jump on me for seemingly unimportant things,
and became irritated with me and others without real cause, I would:
A. Treat him/her with kid gloves for awhile on the assumption that s/he was having
some temporary personal problems which were none of my business.
B. Try to talk to him/her about it and point out to him/her how his/her behavior was
affecting people.
18) If I had begun to dislike certain habits of a friend to the point that it was interfering with my
enjoying his/her company, I would:
A. Say nothing to him/her directly, but let him/her know my feelings by ignoring
him/her whenever his/her annoying habits were obvious.
B. Get my feelings out in the open and clear the air so that we could continue our
friendship comfortably and enjoyably.
19) In discussing social behavior with one of my more sensitive friends, I would:
A. Avoid mentioning his/her flaws and weaknesses so as not to hurt his/her feelings.
B. Focus on his/her flaws and weaknesses so s/he could improve his/her interpersonal
skills.
20) If I knew I might be assigned to an important position in our group and my friends' attitudes toward
me had become rather negative, I would:
th this
by
both of
whole
d affected
would:
as on his/her
to be what
brought up a personal
ware, I would:
suggest
changes I
s/he was unqualified,
r group, I would:
and let
the final
y felt s/he
ng it up with
and would
a rumor
m I had
scuss the
affected by
ts on an issue of
e up again
suggest that
vior s/he suddenly
uld:
riends
his/her
here I
might repeat
he wanted
w about the
my
are none
d a personal problem
subject if
having
vior was
nterfering with my
ing
e our
uld:
eelings.
rpersonal
Responses Questions
1) If a friend of mine had a "personality conflict" with a mutual acquaintance of ours with whom it
was important for him/her to get along, I would:
A. Tell my friend that I felt s/he was partially responsible for any problems with this
other person and try to let him/her know how the person was being affected by
him/her.
B. Not get involved because I wouldn't be able to continue to get along with both of
them once I had entered in any way.
2) If one of my friends and I had a heated argument in the past and I realized that s/he was ill at ease
around me from that time on, I would:
A. Avoid making things worse by discussing his/her behavior and just let the whole
thing drop.
B. Bring up his/her behavior and ask him/her how s/he felt the argument had affected
our relationship.
3) If a friend began to avoid me and act in an aloof and withdrawn manner, I would:
A. Tell him/her about his/her behavior and suggest that s/he tell me what was on his/her
mind.
B. Follow his/her lead and keep our contact brief and aloof since that seems to be what
s/he wants.
4) If two of my friends and I were talking and one of my friends slipped and brought up a personal
problem of mine that involved the other friend, of which s/he was not yet aware, I would:
5) If a friend of mine were to tell me that, in his/her opinion, I was doing things that made me less
effective than I might be in social situations, I would:
A. Ask him/her to spell out or describe what s/he has observed and suggest changes I
might make.
B. Resent his/her criticism and let him/her know why I behave the way I do.
6) If one of my friends aspired to an office in our organization for which I felt s/he was unqualified,
and if s/he had been tentatively assigned to that position by the leader of our group, I would:
A. Not mention my misgivings to either my friend or the leader of our group and let
them handle it in their own way.
B. Tell my friend and the leader of our group of my misgivings and then leave the final
decision up to them.
7) If I felt that one of my friends was being unfair to me and his/her other friends, but none of them
had mentioned anything about it, I would:
A. Ask several of these people how they perceived the situation to see if they felt s/he
was being unfair.
B. Not ask the others how they perceived our friend, but wait for them to bring it up with
me.
8) If I were preoccupied with some personal matters and a friend told me that I had become irritated
with him/her and others and that I was jumping on him/her for unimportant things, I would:
A. Tell him/her I was preoccupied and would probably be on edge for a while and would
prefer not to be bothered.
B. Listen to his/her complaints but not try to explain my actions to him/her.
9) If I had heard some friends discussing an ugly rumor about a friend of mine which I knew could
hurt him/her and s/he asked me what I knew about it, if anything, I would:
A. Say I didn't know anything about it and tell him/her no one would believe a rumor
like that anyway.
B. Tell him/her exactly what I had heard, when I had heard it, and from whom I had
heard it.
10) If a friend pointed out the fact that I had a personality conflict with another friend with whom it
was important for me to get along, I would:
A. Consider his/her comments out of line and tell him/her I didn't want to discuss the
matter any further.
B. Talk about it openly with him/her to find out how my behavior was being affected by
this.
11) If my relationship with a friend has been damaged by repeated arguments on an issue of
importance to us both, I would:
A. Be cautious in my conversations with him/her so the issue would not come up again
to worsen our relationship.
B. Point to the problems the controversy was causing in our relationship and suggest that
we discuss it until we get it resolved.
12) If in a personal discussion with a friend about his/her problems and behavior s/he suddenly
suggested we discuss my problems and behavior as well as his/her own, I would:
A. Try to keep the discussion away from me by suggesting that other, closer friends
often talked to me about such matters.
B. Welcome the opportunity to hear what s/he felt about me and encourage his/her
comments.
13) If a friend of mine began to tell me about his/her hostile feelings about another friend whom s/he
felt was being unkind to others (and I agreed wholeheartedly), I would:
A. Listen and also express my own feelings to me/her so s/he would know where I
stood.
B. Listen, but not express my own negative views and opinion because s/he might repeat
what I said to him/her in confidence.
14) If I thought an ugly rumor was being spread about me and suspected that one of my friends had
quite likely heard it, I would:
A. Avoid mentioning the issue and leave it to him/her to tell me about it if s/he wanted
to.
B. Risk putting him/her on the spot by asking him/her directly what s/he knew about the
whole thing.
15) If I had observed a friend in social situations and thought that s/he was doing a number of things
which hurt his/her relationships, I would:
A. Risk being seen as a busy body and tell him/her what I had observed and my
reactions to it.
B. Keep my opinion to myself rather than be seen as interfering in things that are none
of my business.
16) If two friends and I were talking and one of them inadvertently mentioned a personal problem
which involved me, but of which I knew nothing, I would:
A. Press them for information about the problem and their opinions about it.
B. Leave it up to my friends to tell me or not tell me, letting them change the subject if
they wished.
17) If a friend seemed to be preoccupied and began to jump on me for seemingly unimportant things,
and became irritated with me and others without real cause, I would:
A. Treat him/her with kid gloves for awhile on the assumption that s/he was having
some temporary personal problems which were none of my business.
B. Try to talk to him/her about it and point out to him/her how his/her behavior was
affecting people.
18) If I had begun to dislike certain habits of a friend to the point that it was interfering with my
enjoying his/her company, I would:
A. Say nothing to him/her directly, but let him/her know my feelings by ignoring
him/her whenever his/her annoying habits were obvious.
B. Get my feelings out in the open and clear the air so that we could continue our
friendship comfortably and enjoyably.
19) In discussing social behavior with one of my more sensitive friends, I would:
A. Avoid mentioning his/her flaws and weaknesses so as not to hurt his/her feelings.
B. Focus on his/her flaws and weaknesses so s/he could improve his/her interpersonal
skills.
20) If I knew I might be assigned to an important position in our group and my friends' attitudes toward
me had become rather negative, I would:
th this
by
both of
whole
d affected
would:
as on his/her
to be what
brought up a personal
ware, I would:
suggest
changes I
s/he was unqualified,
r group, I would:
and let
the final
y felt s/he
ng it up with
and would
a rumor
m I had
scuss the
affected by
ts on an issue of
e up again
suggest that
vior s/he suddenly
uld:
riends
his/her
here I
might repeat
he wanted
w about the
my
are none
d a personal problem
subject if
having
vior was
nterfering with my
ing
e our
uld:
eelings.
rpersonal
Responses Questions
1) If a friend of mine had a "personality conflict" with a mutual acquaintance of ours with whom it
was important for him/her to get along, I would:
3 A. Tell my friend that I felt s/he was partially responsible for any problems with this
other person and try to let him/her know how the person was being affected by
him/her.
2 B. Not get involved because I wouldn't be able to continue to get along with both of
them once I had entered in any way.
2) If one of my friends and I had a heated argument in the past and I realized that s/he was ill at ease
around me from that time on, I would:
1 A. Avoid making things worse by discussing his/her behavior and just let the whole
thing drop.
4 B. Bring up his/her behavior and ask him/her how s/he felt the argument had affected
our relationship.
3) If a friend began to avoid me and act in an aloof and withdrawn manner, I would:
3 A. Tell him/her about his/her behavior and suggest that s/he tell me what was on his/her
mind.
2 B. Follow his/her lead and keep our contact brief and aloof since that seems to be what
s/he wants.
4) If two of my friends and I were talking and one of my friends slipped and brought up a personal
problem of mine that involved the other friend, of which s/he was not yet aware, I would:
5) If a friend of mine were to tell me that, in his/her opinion, I was doing things that made me less
effective than I might be in social situations, I would:
3 A. Ask him/her to spell out or describe what s/he has observed and suggest changes I
might make.
2 B. Resent his/her criticism and let him/her know why I behave the way I do.
6) If one of my friends aspired to an office in our organization for which I felt s/he was unqualified,
and if s/he had been tentatively assigned to that position by the leader of our group, I would:
2 A. Not mention my misgivings to either my friend or the leader of our group and let
them handle it in their own way.
3 B. Tell my friend and the leader of our group of my misgivings and then leave the final
decision up to them.
7) If I felt that one of my friends was being unfair to me and his/her other friends, but none of them
had mentioned anything about it, I would:
1 A. Ask several of these people how they perceived the situation to see if they felt s/he
was being unfair.
4 B. Not ask the others how they perceived our friend, but wait for them to bring it up with
me.
8) If I were preoccupied with some personal matters and a friend told me that I had become irritated
with him/her and others and that I was jumping on him/her for unimportant things, I would:
3 A. Tell him/her I was preoccupied and would probably be on edge for a while and would
prefer not to be bothered.
2 B. Listen to his/her complaints but not try to explain my actions to him/her.
9) If I had heard some friends discussing an ugly rumor about a friend of mine which I knew could
hurt him/her and s/he asked me what I knew about it, if anything, I would:
A. Say I didn't know anything about it and tell him/her no one would believe a rumor
like that anyway.
B. Tell him/her exactly what I had heard, when I had heard it, and from whom I had
heard it.
10) If a friend pointed out the fact that I had a personality conflict with another friend with whom it
was important for me to get along, I would:
5 A. Consider his/her comments out of line and tell him/her I didn't want to discuss the
matter any further.
0 B. Talk about it openly with him/her to find out how my behavior was being affected by
this.
11) If my relationship with a friend has been damaged by repeated arguments on an issue of
importance to us both, I would:
4 A. Be cautious in my conversations with him/her so the issue would not come up again
to worsen our relationship.
1 B. Point to the problems the controversy was causing in our relationship and suggest that
we discuss it until we get it resolved.
12) If in a personal discussion with a friend about his/her problems and behavior s/he suddenly
suggested we discuss my problems and behavior as well as his/her own, I would:
0 A. Try to keep the discussion away from me by suggesting that other, closer friends
often talked to me about such matters.
5 B. Welcome the opportunity to hear what s/he felt about me and encourage his/her
comments.
13) If a friend of mine began to tell me about his/her hostile feelings about another friend whom s/he
felt was being unkind to others (and I agreed wholeheartedly), I would:
4 A. Listen and also express my own feelings to me/her so s/he would know where I
stood.
1 B. Listen, but not express my own negative views and opinion because s/he might repeat
what I said to him/her in confidence.
14) If I thought an ugly rumor was being spread about me and suspected that one of my friends had
quite likely heard it, I would:
0 A. Avoid mentioning the issue and leave it to him/her to tell me about it if s/he wanted
to.
5 B. Risk putting him/her on the spot by asking him/her directly what s/he knew about the
whole thing.
15) If I had observed a friend in social situations and thought that s/he was doing a number of things
which hurt his/her relationships, I would:
4 A. Risk being seen as a busy body and tell him/her what I had observed and my
reactions to it.
1 B. Keep my opinion to myself rather than be seen as interfering in things that are none
of my business.
16) If two friends and I were talking and one of them inadvertently mentioned a personal problem
which involved me, but of which I knew nothing, I would:
2 A. Press them for information about the problem and their opinions about it.
3 B. Leave it up to my friends to tell me or not tell me, letting them change the subject if
they wished.
17) If a friend seemed to be preoccupied and began to jump on me for seemingly unimportant things,
and became irritated with me and others without real cause, I would:
2 A. Treat him/her with kid gloves for awhile on the assumption that s/he was having
some temporary personal problems which were none of my business.
3 B. Try to talk to him/her about it and point out to him/her how his/her behavior was
affecting people.
18) If I had begun to dislike certain habits of a friend to the point that it was interfering with my
enjoying his/her company, I would:
0 A. Say nothing to him/her directly, but let him/her know my feelings by ignoring
him/her whenever his/her annoying habits were obvious.
5 B. Get my feelings out in the open and clear the air so that we could continue our
friendship comfortably and enjoyably.
19) In discussing social behavior with one of my more sensitive friends, I would:
1 A. Avoid mentioning his/her flaws and weaknesses so as not to hurt his/her feelings.
4 B. Focus on his/her flaws and weaknesses so s/he could improve his/her interpersonal
skills.
20) If I knew I might be assigned to an important position in our group and my friends' attitudes toward
me had become rather negative, I would:
th this
by
both of
whole
d affected
would:
as on his/her
to be what
brought up a personal
ware, I would:
suggest
changes I
s/he was unqualified,
r group, I would:
and let
the final
y felt s/he
ng it up with
and would
a rumor
m I had
scuss the
affected by
ts on an issue of
e up again
suggest that
vior s/he suddenly
uld:
riends
his/her
here I
might repeat
he wanted
w about the
my
are none
d a personal problem
subject if
having
vior was
nterfering with my
ing
e our
uld:
eelings.
rpersonal
Responses Questions
1) If a friend of mine had a "personality conflict" with a mutual acquaintance of ours with whom it
was important for him/her to get along, I would:
2 A. Tell my friend that I felt s/he was partially responsible for any problems with this
other person and try to let him/her know how the person was being affected by
him/her.
5 B. Not get involved because I wouldn't be able to continue to get along with both of
them once I had entered in any way.
2) If one of my friends and I had a heated argument in the past and I realized that s/he was ill at ease
around me from that time on, I would:
1 A. Avoid making things worse by discussing his/her behavior and just let the whole
thing drop.
4 B. Bring up his/her behavior and ask him/her how s/he felt the argument had affected
our relationship.
3) If a friend began to avoid me and act in an aloof and withdrawn manner, I would:
1 A. Tell him/her about his/her behavior and suggest that s/he tell me what was on his/her
mind.
4 B. Follow his/her lead and keep our contact brief and aloof since that seems to be what
s/he wants.
4) If two of my friends and I were talking and one of my friends slipped and brought up a personal
problem of mine that involved the other friend, of which s/he was not yet aware, I would:
5) If a friend of mine were to tell me that, in his/her opinion, I was doing things that made me less
effective than I might be in social situations, I would:
1 A. Ask him/her to spell out or describe what s/he has observed and suggest changes I
might make.
4 B. Resent his/her criticism and let him/her know why I behave the way I do.
6) If one of my friends aspired to an office in our organization for which I felt s/he was unqualified,
and if s/he had been tentatively assigned to that position by the leader of our group, I would:
1 A. Not mention my misgivings to either my friend or the leader of our group and let
them handle it in their own way.
4 B. Tell my friend and the leader of our group of my misgivings and then leave the final
decision up to them.
7) If I felt that one of my friends was being unfair to me and his/her other friends, but none of them
had mentioned anything about it, I would:
1 A. Ask several of these people how they perceived the situation to see if they felt s/he
was being unfair.
4 B. Not ask the others how they perceived our friend, but wait for them to bring it up with
me.
8) If I were preoccupied with some personal matters and a friend told me that I had become irritated
with him/her and others and that I was jumping on him/her for unimportant things, I would:
1 A. Tell him/her I was preoccupied and would probably be on edge for a while and would
prefer not to be bothered.
4 B. Listen to his/her complaints but not try to explain my actions to him/her.
9) If I had heard some friends discussing an ugly rumor about a friend of mine which I knew could
hurt him/her and s/he asked me what I knew about it, if anything, I would:
1 A. Say I didn't know anything about it and tell him/her no one would believe a rumor
like that anyway.
4 B. Tell him/her exactly what I had heard, when I had heard it, and from whom I had
heard it.
10) If a friend pointed out the fact that I had a personality conflict with another friend with whom it
was important for me to get along, I would:
1 A. Consider his/her comments out of line and tell him/her I didn't want to discuss the
matter any further.
4 B. Talk about it openly with him/her to find out how my behavior was being affected by
this.
11) If my relationship with a friend has been damaged by repeated arguments on an issue of
importance to us both, I would:
1 A. Be cautious in my conversations with him/her so the issue would not come up again
to worsen our relationship.
4 B. Point to the problems the controversy was causing in our relationship and suggest that
we discuss it until we get it resolved.
12) If in a personal discussion with a friend about his/her problems and behavior s/he suddenly
suggested we discuss my problems and behavior as well as his/her own, I would:
1 A. Try to keep the discussion away from me by suggesting that other, closer friends
often talked to me about such matters.
4 B. Welcome the opportunity to hear what s/he felt about me and encourage his/her
comments.
13) If a friend of mine began to tell me about his/her hostile feelings about another friend whom s/he
felt was being unkind to others (and I agreed wholeheartedly), I would:
1 A. Listen and also express my own feelings to me/her so s/he would know where I
stood.
4 B. Listen, but not express my own negative views and opinion because s/he might repeat
what I said to him/her in confidence.
14) If I thought an ugly rumor was being spread about me and suspected that one of my friends had
quite likely heard it, I would:
1 A. Avoid mentioning the issue and leave it to him/her to tell me about it if s/he wanted
to.
4 B. Risk putting him/her on the spot by asking him/her directly what s/he knew about the
whole thing.
15) If I had observed a friend in social situations and thought that s/he was doing a number of things
which hurt his/her relationships, I would:
2 A. Risk being seen as a busy body and tell him/her what I had observed and my
reactions to it.
3 B. Keep my opinion to myself rather than be seen as interfering in things that are none
of my business.
16) If two friends and I were talking and one of them inadvertently mentioned a personal problem
which involved me, but of which I knew nothing, I would:
1 A. Press them for information about the problem and their opinions about it.
4 B. Leave it up to my friends to tell me or not tell me, letting them change the subject if
they wished.
17) If a friend seemed to be preoccupied and began to jump on me for seemingly unimportant things,
and became irritated with me and others without real cause, I would:
1 A. Treat him/her with kid gloves for awhile on the assumption that s/he was having
some temporary personal problems which were none of my business.
4 B. Try to talk to him/her about it and point out to him/her how his/her behavior was
affecting people.
18) If I had begun to dislike certain habits of a friend to the point that it was interfering with my
enjoying his/her company, I would:
1 A. Say nothing to him/her directly, but let him/her know my feelings by ignoring
him/her whenever his/her annoying habits were obvious.
4 B. Get my feelings out in the open and clear the air so that we could continue our
friendship comfortably and enjoyably.
19) In discussing social behavior with one of my more sensitive friends, I would:
1 A. Avoid mentioning his/her flaws and weaknesses so as not to hurt his/her feelings.
4 B. Focus on his/her flaws and weaknesses so s/he could improve his/her interpersonal
skills.
20) If I knew I might be assigned to an important position in our group and my friends' attitudes toward
me had become rather negative, I would:
th this
by
both of
whole
d affected
would:
as on his/her
to be what
brought up a personal
ware, I would:
suggest
changes I
s/he was unqualified,
r group, I would:
and let
the final
y felt s/he
ng it up with
and would
a rumor
m I had
scuss the
affected by
ts on an issue of
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Responses Questions
1) If a friend of mine had a "personality conflict" with a mutual acquaintance of ours with whom it
was important for him/her to get along, I would:
3 other person and try to let him/her know how the person was being affected by
him/her.
4 B. Not get involved because I wouldn't be able to continue to get along with both of
them once I had entered in any way.
2) If one of my friends and I had a heated argument in the past and I realized that s/he was ill at ease
around me from that time on, I would:
2 A. Avoid making things worse by discussing his/her behavior and just let the whole
thing drop.
3 B. Bring up his/her behavior and ask him/her how s/he felt the argument had affected
our relationship.
3) If a friend began to avoid me and act in an aloof and withdrawn manner, I would:
3 A. Tell him/her about his/her behavior and suggest that s/he tell me what was on his/her
mind.
2 B. Follow his/her lead and keep our contact brief and aloof since that seems to be what
s/he wants.
4) If two of my friends and I were talking and one of my friends slipped and brought up a personal
problem of mine that involved the other friend, of which s/he was not yet aware, I would:
5) If a friend of mine were to tell me that, in his/her opinion, I was doing things that made me less
effective than I might be in social situations, I would:
0 A. Ask him/her to spell out or describe what s/he has observed and suggest changes I
might make.
5 B. Resent his/her criticism and let him/her know why I behave the way I do.
6) If one of my friends aspired to an office in our organization for which I felt s/he was unqualified,
and if s/he had been tentatively assigned to that position by the leader of our group, I would:
4 A. Not mention my misgivings to either my friend or the leader of our group and let
them handle it in their own way.
1 B. Tell my friend and the leader of our group of my misgivings and then leave the final
decision up to them.
7) If I felt that one of my friends was being unfair to me and his/her other friends, but none of them
had mentioned anything about it, I would:
3 A. Ask several of these people how they perceived the situation to see if they felt s/he
was being unfair.
2 B. Not ask the others how they perceived our friend, but wait for them to bring it up with
me.
8) If I were preoccupied with some personal matters and a friend told me that I had become irritated
with him/her and others and that I was jumping on him/her for unimportant things, I would:
2 A. Tell him/her I was preoccupied and would probably be on edge for a while and would
prefer not to be bothered.
3 B. Listen to his/her complaints but not try to explain my actions to him/her.
9) If I had heard some friends discussing an ugly rumor about a friend of mine which I knew could
hurt him/her and s/he asked me what I knew about it, if anything, I would:
4 A. Say I didn't know anything about it and tell him/her no one would believe a rumor
like that anyway.
1 B. Tell him/her exactly what I had heard, when I had heard it, and from whom I had
heard it.
10) If a friend pointed out the fact that I had a personality conflict with another friend with whom it
was important for me to get along, I would:
5 A. Consider his/her comments out of line and tell him/her I didn't want to discuss the
matter any further.
0 B. Talk about it openly with him/her to find out how my behavior was being affected by
this.
11) If my relationship with a friend has been damaged by repeated arguments on an issue of
importance to us both, I would:
0 A. Be cautious in my conversations with him/her so the issue would not come up again
to worsen our relationship.
5 B. Point to the problems the controversy was causing in our relationship and suggest that
we discuss it until we get it resolved.
12) If in a personal discussion with a friend about his/her problems and behavior s/he suddenly
suggested we discuss my problems and behavior as well as his/her own, I would:
3 A. Try to keep the discussion away from me by suggesting that other, closer friends
often talked to me about such matters.
2 B. Welcome the opportunity to hear what s/he felt about me and encourage his/her
comments.
13) If a friend of mine began to tell me about his/her hostile feelings about another friend whom s/he
felt was being unkind to others (and I agreed wholeheartedly), I would:
4 A. Listen and also express my own feelings to me/her so s/he would know where I
stood.
1 B. Listen, but not express my own negative views and opinion because s/he might repeat
what I said to him/her in confidence.
14) If I thought an ugly rumor was being spread about me and suspected that one of my friends had
quite likely heard it, I would:
1 A. Avoid mentioning the issue and leave it to him/her to tell me about it if s/he wanted
to.
4 B. Risk putting him/her on the spot by asking him/her directly what s/he knew about the
whole thing.
15) If I had observed a friend in social situations and thought that s/he was doing a number of things
which hurt his/her relationships, I would:
3 A. Risk being seen as a busy body and tell him/her what I had observed and my
reactions to it.
2 B. Keep my opinion to myself rather than be seen as interfering in things that are none
of my business.
16) If two friends and I were talking and one of them inadvertently mentioned a personal problem
which involved me, but of which I knew nothing, I would:
4 A. Press them for information about the problem and their opinions about it.
1 B. Leave it up to my friends to tell me or not tell me, letting them change the subject if
they wished.
17) If a friend seemed to be preoccupied and began to jump on me for seemingly unimportant things,
and became irritated with me and others without real cause, I would:
5 A. Treat him/her with kid gloves for awhile on the assumption that s/he was having
some temporary personal problems which were none of my business.
0 B. Try to talk to him/her about it and point out to him/her how his/her behavior was
affecting people.
18) If I had begun to dislike certain habits of a friend to the point that it was interfering with my
enjoying his/her company, I would:
2 A. Say nothing to him/her directly, but let him/her know my feelings by ignoring
him/her whenever his/her annoying habits were obvious.
3 B. Get my feelings out in the open and clear the air so that we could continue our
friendship comfortably and enjoyably.
19) In discussing social behavior with one of my more sensitive friends, I would:
1 A. Avoid mentioning his/her flaws and weaknesses so as not to hurt his/her feelings.
5 B. Focus on his/her flaws and weaknesses so s/he could improve his/her interpersonal
skills.
20) If I knew I might be assigned to an important position in our group and my friends' attitudes toward
me had become rather negative, I would:
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