Fleshed Database of unintegrated experiences

Dude, the amount of cis men who watch MLP is insane. Bronies are literally a thing, it's a massive fandom.

The trick is to literally not give a fuck. Like, you're going to have people dislike you for being trans, you're going to have people dislike you for being a man (transandrophobia is a terrible thing), and you're going to have people make fun of you for interests. To be blunt, as it's the best advice I can give you: stop caring.

Just do what makes you happy, be yourself, and learn to clap back at people when they do try shitting on you, or learn to just ignore the haters.

Elisa Rae Shupe

a non-binary army veteran, one of the first to have their gender mark changed to an X is found hanging with a trans flag wrapped around them.

article 1 article 2

SAY HER NAME

Tahiry 'Tokyo' Broom

a transgender black woman who was shot and killed in the morning, targeted by a man who called various sex workers and transgender women the morning of.

article 1 article 2 gofundme

SAY HIS NAME

Sam Nordquist

a biracial transgender man that was found, had been lured to a motel by a woman he trusted, he was then abused sexually and tortured for weeks before he died, 5 people had to do with it and it's an ongoing investigation, they're trying to claim it's not a hate crime.

Like, I see shit like this:

"DNI if you don't believe in transandrophobia/transmisandry, but you believe in transmisogyny"

Why are you even bringing up transmisogyny? If your problem is with people not believing in transandrophobia/transmisandry specifically, what does transmisogyny have to do with it? Why are these things related in your mind, to the extent that you had to bring up belief in transmisogyny alongside disbelief in transandrophobia/transmisandry?

Idk, fix that shit.

Even my cis boyfriend looking at my tumblr noticed this immediately and thought it seemed transmisogynistic, and he's a beginner at this.

(I do not care about transandrophobia/transmisandry as terms. I don't use them, and I don't care if others do; this is discourse that I do not engage in.)

(When I want to refer to transphobia directed at trans men/mascs, I usually say "transphobia directed at trans men/mascs" but I get that it's wordy and understand the desire for new terminology. Julia Serano addressed a similar lexical gap as well, noting the lack of terminology for the specific intersection of transphobia and misogyny that trans men/mascs and certain nonbinary folk face.)

(We don't yet have perfect language for this, and I'm not going to judge people for trying to find solutions to that lexical gap.)

"Trans women need to stop dictating what trans men call themselves; trans men can be femboys."

The vast majority of people telling trans men that we can't be femboys, that I've seen, were not trans women. I've been told by only one person in real life that I can't call myself a femboy because "it's transmisogynistic," and they were not a trans woman or transfem. Contrasted with this, many trans women/fems have affirmed my femboyhood, both in real life and online. Why are you singling out trans women here?

"Why are trans women siding with-"

Stop. Pause. Why are you singling out trans women? This was on a post that had nothing to do with trans women.

Honestly the dark truth is that I don't know a lot of trans men. I know dead trans boys who should have grown much older than they did. My closest friend for example, was a victim of an honour killing.

Trans communities here are widely transfem dominated. (This of course, is its own kind of precarious position, and I wouldn't view it as a privilege.)

I've seen some of the kindest bravest young men i've ever known become wives, servants and mothers to a husband and children they never wanted.

i went to a new doctor a little while ago, and they looked up PMDD as it’s not a diagnosis they were familiar with. IAPMD’s website referred to it as a “condition affecting people who were AFAB,” so the doctor tried to remove it from my record because according to her research it “didn’t apply to me.”

faux leather is pleather, which is plastic. the process of mining, refining, and fabricating plastic causes enormous environmental damage at every step of the way. oil refineries regularly cause massive die offs of birds, small mammals, and EVERY local invertebrate. the degrading plastic from pleather garments (which break down after only a few years) produces microplastics and leads to groundwater contamination, killing off amphibians and, later, sea life. faux leather can't be repaired or recycled, only replaced by a new, equally toxic product.

tanneries are not exactly fountains of health, but a leather jacket uses the skin of a domestic cow that was already killed for meat. leather jackets can also be refurbished or recycled. once entirely discarded, leather will rot in place, rather than fragment into toxic forever particles.

leather is the product of an animal's death in a tangible, recognizable form that you can immediately assess. one jacket, one cow. you touch the skin of that dead animal and you flinch from it.

pleather can tell you that no animals were harmed, because it harms animals that you will never see. it outsources responsibility. you're not touching the skin of the birds that drowned in oil spills and the tadpoles that hatched into toxic rivers. the fish that will choke on the microplastics of your new jacket aren't born yet when you walk out of the shop. the material of the jacket is so abstract and your culpability is so obscure that you can believe what you are told: it is clean. you are clean. no harm, no foul.

Monsters, Mecha, and Greek Myth: 10 books, $15, cyberpunk, sci-fi, horror, centered around the Gunmetal Olympus Series, with the main book The Hades Calculus by Maria Ying, mostly trans women afaik (+ lesbian characters)

Ela Bambust Science Fiction Bundle: 7 books, 10$, sci-fi, many trans women (+ lesbian characters)

Claudie's Aro Week 2025: 6 books, $15, sale for Aro Week, fantasy + solarpunk, works by Claudie Arseneault, Baker Thief has a genderqueer character, Awakenings has a nonbinary character (+ obviously aromantic and aroace characters!)

As long as he's not trolling why should we exclude a guy who genuinely feels their attraction to women is queer/sapphic/lesbian/etc? This is how a few trans girls & nonbinary folk I've met realized they were trans, they realized they were a lesbian before coming to terms with the fact they're a woman / not actually a guy. And you know what, that's literally fucking fine. Not to mention, sometimes using the 'wrong' sexuality labels for your gender can be a form of gender nonconformity. Gnc/genderqueer guy finds it validating to identify as a lesbian? Awesome. Cool as hell.

is it because you're scared of the word vulva? of acknowledging out loud that some people have penises? of recognising that many many people, including but certainly not limited to trans people, have mixed sex characteristics that cannot be accurately summarised by "afab/amab" as shorthand for "female/male"?

"in [GENITAL RELATED] situation AFABs will need to do X and AMABs will need to do Y" there are "afabs" with penises and "amabs" with vulvas. Saying this shit makes you look so unserious & honestly transphobic (given the ongoing erasure of post-op trans people within broader community). Intersex people and GRS have both existed for long enough (fucking forever and, decades, respectively) that we should well past making this basic fucking mistake.