Project X (2012)

Jonathan Daniel Brown: JB

Photos 

Quotes 

• Thomas : [holding the gnome]  How did this thing get up here? Was someone in my parent's room?

  Costa : It's a gnome. I guess he gets around. Who cares, man?

  Thomas : Well, I just don't want people up here. Besides it's creepy. Look at him. JB, what are you looking for?

  JB : Looking to see if your dad has condoms. I'm working on something downstairs.

  Costa : The only thing you're working on is diabetes, you fat fuck.

• Costa : [All 3 are sprawled on the front lawn]  I love you guys. No seriously. Look I realize I can be like a huge dick sometimes, I'm really sorry for that.

  Thomas : It's okay.

  Costa : No it's not. JB, I'm sorry for buying you a bra on your birthday. That wasn't cool.

  JB : Wasn't cool man.

  Costa : And I'm sorry for all the times I called you "fat fuck." "Pudgy bitch." "Fudgy the whale." And I'm sorry for that time at your brother's Bar Mitzvah when I told everyone you look like Rosie O'Donnell because you don't.

  JB : I don't.

• JB : Holy shit, dude. It's Miles Teller.

  Thomas : Dude, it is. That's him! Holy shit.

  JB : He's so badass.

  Costa : Yeah, my boy's starting at second base for USC.

  JB : I heard he got sent to detention once and wound up banging the teacher.

  Costa : Mi-Tell! What's crackin' bro? We go to North Pas.

  Thomas : Yeah, dude, big fans.

  Costa : Huge fans.

  Miles : Cool. Awesome.

  Costa : Look, we're making a movie.

  JB : Invite him, man. Come on.

  Thomas : Okay. Listen, Miles, we're having a little soiree at my place tonight. If you wanna swing by it should be.

  Costa : [interrupts]  Teller, my boy here is underselling this like a mother fucker. This shit's gonna be legit. You should definitely swing by.

  Miles : Yeah, I can't. I actually have other plans tonight, so I might not make it.

  Costa : Dude, think about it. It's on Dickens Street. We'd love to have you.

  Miles : Dickens Street?

  Costa : Yeah.

  Miles : That's your party? You guys are throwing that? That's where I'm going. I heard it's gonna be fucking crazy, bro!

  Thomas : That's my party. I'm Thomas Kub. It's my birthday today.

  Miles : Yeah, I heard it's gonna be unlimited high school pussy and shit.

  Costa : Dude, high school pussy for days.

• Thomas : [All 3 lay on the front lawn, high on ecstasy]  Hey guys? I hooked up with Kirby. I'm like, really into her.

  Costa : Okay seriously Thomas, that's like cool and all, but she's like always been around. It's like hooking up with JB, but her tits are smaller.

  JB : Hey.

  Costa : I'm just saying. Kirby's sort of like, one of us. Tonights about the girls we never had a shot at. Tonight's about changing the game.

• JB : Alexis won't come. She fucks college dudes.

• Rob : Hey, Thomas. Look man I don't want to be a dick here or anything, but your friend Oliver came by earlier and told me you guys were having a little party but this is too much.

  Thomas : Yeah. We actually should be winding down like midnight, maybe 1. Is that okay?

  Rob : No, it's not. I'm sorry. The baby can't sleep and Melinda's gotta be up early for work.

  Costa : Fuck yeah! My boy Rob is here to rage! Good to see you, brother.

  Rob : Whoa, yeah. Actually I'm not raging, but I'm just telling Thomas it's time to shut it down.

  Costa : You can't be serious. This is a great party. What the fuck?

  Rob : I am serious because it's 11:30 at night and it's time to wrap it up.

  JB : Hey, hey, hey. Why don't we just bring everyone to the back and lower the volume a bit.

  Rob : Guys, this isn't a request! The party's over.

  Costa : I guess we're just gonna have to agree to disagree then, aren't we?

  Rob : Listen to me. Thomas, either shut it down or I'm calling the cops. Fine, fuck it! I'm calling the fucking cops.

  [gets a taser shot by Everett] 

  Costa : Fuck! Oh shit!

  JB : Jesus fucking Christ! What did you do that for?

  Costa : [Rob punches Everett in the face]  Are you fucking kidding me? I will fucking kill you!

  Rob : The little fuck tazed me! I'm definitely calling the cops now!

  Costa : You punched a kid in the face! I'm calling the cops on your ass now!

  Rob : Do it, genius! It's all on tape. I just saw this mother fucker record it right here.

  Dax : No, all I got was you punching that little child's face.

  Rob : Fuck you!

  Costa : Go home, Robert!

• Everett - Security Guard : Hey boss.

  JB : What the fuck?

  Costa : There he is! This is Everett and his boy Tyler. They're gonna be running security for the night.

  Thomas : Are you serious? Are those nun-chucks?

  Everett - Security Guard : Yeah.

  Thomas : [laughing]  Oh shit.

  JB : You guys look like Ninjas.

  Tyler : Ninjas are fucking pussies!

  Costa : That's why I love this kid.

  Tyler : You know it.

  Costa : Seriously Thomas, with these two we got nothing to worry about.

• Thomas : [the three watch the party from the bathroom window]  Where the fuck did all these people even come from? You know some guy down there told me he found out about the party on fucking Craigslist?

  Costa : My dad met my step-mom on Craigslist.

  Thomas : So you just put up my address on the fucking internet?

  JB : Well, not just the internet.

  Costa : Shut the fuck up JB!

  Thomas : No wait, what the fuck is he talking about?

  Costa : Okay, I had Jesse Marco put out an email blast and he may have called a radio station.

  Thomas : You motherfuckers!

• JB : [Chinese accent]  The Kung Fu no good here.

  [T-Rick runs into the window]