User reviews

Have plenty of crackers ready for all this cheese. This movie is for the person who loves those late-night public access horror hosted shows. In fact, it's a safe bet that's the only way you'll ever see this movie. It's that bad.

But that's what makes it so great! Hokey dialog, corny special effects and cardboard sets, along with some of the dingiest background music (and theme song) you're likely to ever hear. Add that to the cartoon-sounding sound effects and you've got a worse-than-Starcrash movie that'll satisfy any B-movie fan! UPDATE: This movie, believe it or not, has been released on DVD. The copy is as bad as the movie, but if you can find it in the dollar bin, there you go!

Winner, Academy Award, Category: "Worst Robot in a Sci-fi Film"

Believe it or not, but I've managed to stay awake long enough through three of these Alfonso Breschia sci-fi crapfests to notice that each one of them does have a different angle. Cosmos: War of the Planets had a slight horror angle, War of the Robots was a straight forward sci-fi action flick and Star Odyssey tries to include a lot of humour. I have seen the Beast in Space but we all know the angle there is Sirpa Lane's nipples.

It does matter how he approaches these films, they are all miserable failures featuring the same sets, the same extras in blonde robot wigs, the same uniforms for the good guys (I hope they at least washed them - I wouldn't fancy getting Antonio Sabato's sweaty hand-me-downs), the same Yanti Somer, the same space battle footage and the same sense that even Breschia himself was not remotely interested in what he was creating. Let's dive in!

Or not, as the whole first half of the film seems to have been cut and pasted together as some key scenes seem to happen after other stuff has occurred. Basically, an alien that looks like he's fallen asleep on an electric fly swatter has bought Earth, and instead of making contact he just starts gathering together loads of humans for slavery. This enrages campy Earth leader Franco Rassell, who orders a crack team of human jerks to get together to sort out this intergalactic chugnut.

This lot includes Han Solo type Gianni Garko, who can hypnotise people and gets into a fistfight with Nello Pazzafini (in the confusing footage we see the fight first, then the reason it started later), Yanti Somer, ex-lover of Garko and niece of elderly scientist Ennio Balbao, who is trying to figure out some way to penetrate the weird substance surrounding the enemy spaceship (more confusing footage). There's Han Solo type Chris Avram and Melissa Longo, who is guess is supposed to be Chewbacca? Throw in a guy with ADHD and a pompous military guy and we're good to go...except for the two suicide-pact robots they pick up from a seventies scrapyard.

The fact that Tilt and Tilly have more character than everyone else shows you how bad this film is. They had a suicide pact but can't remember how (it's because they couldn't shag), and they bicker, complain, write poems to each other and wonder how the blonde-wig robots aren't attacking them. There's also this other robot which is like some child in a Halloween costume wandered on set or perhaps is a dwarf slave Breschi was humiliating for sexual purposes.

All this crapness is lost like tears in rain as the whole things just devolves into the same endless laser battles, light-sabre (pound shop version) battles, and worst of all, the interminable space battle at the end. That battle doesn't quite last as long as the one in War of the Robots, but...that's about the only good thing I can say about it.

The version I watched did have an ending, although it did cut off a guy at the end mid-sentence, so that was good.

What happened to you Gianni Gark - you used to be Sartana! What happened to you Ennio Balbao - you used to be a Mafia Don! Yanti Somer - you have no excuse - you were in the last two as well!

This is the third "Al Bradly" movie I have watched in the last couple of weeks and like the other 2 (Cosmos: War of the Planets and The War of the Robots) uses many of the same sets, costumes, cast and effects shots. And like the other two it is total and unmitigated crap from start to finish. The weirdness start in the credits when after the "Stars" the rest of the cast in listed in "Alphabetical Order". I don't know what kind of scary arsed alien alphabet they were using but it wasn't the ABC I was taught at school.

The plot is straight out of a 1920s pre Hugo Gernsback Scientifiction pulp with strutting heroes, mentally superior super-scientists (complete with beautiful niece), cute robots, an alien overlord intent on enslaving the human race etc. etc.

The Alien overlord shows his superiority over the puny humans by unleashing a short montage of Black and White footage of buildings being destroyed in World War 2 - a bit alarming coming in the middle of a colour SF movie. Meanwhile the Earth Government suppress the news that entire cities are being wiped off the face of the planet and turn to the only man who can stop the aliens reducing the earth to radioactive doo-doo and enslaving all the black people he can find.

That isn't a joke on my part - the only shots of aliens enslaving people has them rounding up some "African Natives" - though the translators, probably conscious of this blatant bit of racial stereotyping, do go out of their way to get characters to tell each other that other races are getting lifted in vast numbers too.

So confident are the powers that be in their chosen Super-scientist saviour he has to illegally assemble his team of Super-scientist helpers by stealing spaceships and springing them from Jail.

Even weirder is the sequence about three quarters through the movie in which three scenes that should have been at the start of the flick turn up in no apparent order (Though this may just be on the DVD copy I own -part of a 20 movie box set called Space Quest) when we see the gambler hero in the casino, the auction where "Sol 3" is bought by the Alien, and a scene in the Human control room where the High Command take a break from their "who has the gayest moustache" contest long enough to realise that the Earth is utterly screwed.

Aimed at a target audience of retarded 7 year olds.

Out of boredom, my friends and I decided to have ourselves a "worst movie marathon". Among the titles we rented were "la guerre de l'espace en l'an 3000", "La soupe au chou", " Como rubare la corena de Ingleterra" and "Space Oddysey (english title of this movie)". Although all the movies were disgusting and hard to watch, this one had to be the worst...

Here are a few things that stood out...

• A male and a female robot ( she has metal eyelashes) in love!

• A woman scientist working in a tight leather "swim suit"

• A gymnast fighter ( we dubbed him "mr exercise" ) who jumps around during the movie

• A hero who walks around like he is constipated

• An army of evil "droids" with blond wigs and silver suits

The characters are not developed, ( some seem to come out of thin air) and the villain is laughable.

The thing that got me the most, though, is the fact that this movie has no end, literally; Music covers the dialog in the last scene, were everything unfolds.

Really, this is something you should try to find at your local videostore.

-1,5 * :)

"A race of aliens is en route to Earth with the intent of enslaving the human race. The world turns to a top scientist in the hopes that he, and the team he pits together, can come up with a plan to drive off the extraterrestrial invaders. Is there enough time for our hero and his companions to prepare for a fight the will decide the fate of the entire planet?" asks the DVD sleeve's synopsis.

Man's first contact with an alien race turns sour when they want to take over the planet, and make us futuristic slaves. "Star Odyssey" (in English) is a another cheap attempt to cash-in on the "Star Wars" success; although it doesn't really steal much story, and attempts some of its own cheesy style. The title and advertising graphics must have lured fewer victims this time around, as there was no follow-up.

Gianni Garko (as Dirk) and Yanti Somer (as Irene) manage to keep straight hero and heroine faces. This had to be difficult with lovesick robots "Tilt" and "Tilly" wandering around. The promise to alter their parts, so the mechanical couple would be able to consummate their relationship, is never shown on screen. Alas, it might have made the movie more than a complete waste of resources.

* Sette uomini d'oro nello spazio (10/26/79) Alfonso Brescia ~ Gianni Garko, Yanti Somer, Malisa Longo

The film begins with what might be the crappiest electronic music in the history of movies! Is this is shade of things to come? You betcha! "Star Odyssey" is an Italian film that features really bad acting and amazingly low production values for a sci-fi movie. I saw a dubbed version and perhaps the original was a bit better--but it's still filled with weird and cheap costumes as well as bad camera-work and these are obvious no matter the language. Additionally, the sets look like very simple rooms adorned with just a few trinkets to make it look 'space-agy'. And, one of the few outdoor sets was in a junkyard! The net effect is a film that just almost always looks really cheap--almost like an amateur production (though I did like the villain with the face that looked like a waffle). My favorite bad special effect were the weird glowy eyes--you just have to see them to believe 'em.

The plot involves some intergalactic baddie coming to attack the earth with his silly looking robots. Much of the plot frankly confused me--probably because it was so silly and dull I had difficulty staying awake. Plus, I think the film lost a bit in translation.

This is an effort at an outrageous space epic, where nothing is funny and the characters are about as bland and inconsequential as one can get. Once again the earth is threatened (actually it has been purchased). The population is going to be enslaved once this guy, who has a face like a hand grenade does what he does to them. The silly people of earth have to depend on some guy whom they treat badly, but who has great powers to repel the force. There are some idiotic droids, especially a male and female (for whatever reason), who provide what I guess is comic relief. The whole thing is a joke. We never really get what the powers are. We never really understand the strategies. There are, however, a group of androids who dress like Carol Channing. Now that could have been funny.

This one is just downright glorious. If you love absolutely terrible movies, you'll dig the ever-loving heck out of this one! The maverick male lead is named Dirk Laramie (played to a cheesetacular tee by Gianni Garko, and he rocks a blonde porno 'stache and makes out with all the hot babes. The plot is about as meandering and ridiculous as the dialogue (though it has some hilarious lines throughout) and soundtrack (think: improvisational jazz on a moog synth but on acid), so tough to summarize but they're on the hunt for entherium and silly spacecapades ensue along the way. It rips off Star Trek outfits, and Star Wars (light sabers and R2D2), has a literal rock-'em-sock-'em robot (this one is gray though), and characters that are almost an exact version of Bronco from Gentlemen Broncos, an auction scene with Flash Gordon vibes and haunted muppet-looking characters, a pair of suicidal star-crossed robot lovers that look like teletubbies meet Howard the Duck, and sooooo much more.

Whoever said this is why the Italians weren't known for space movies was dead wrong (in my opinion)-this is an absolute treasure!

You'll do well to just get lost in it and don't approach it critically as this fever dream-esque space romp just straight up wilds out hard, and may be the king-nay, emperor-of bad boomer-era space movies. A must-watch that will definitely end up in my regular rotation and at the pinnacle of my altar to campy flicks!

(P. S. I can't believe it hasn't been RiffTrax'd or MST3K'd yet, but since it's in the public domain now I have high hopes!)

I remember when my great great grandfather was on his deathbed he said these words to me 'son, whatever you do, never watch an Italian sci-fi movie'. After receiving this sage advice I sadly turned away, only for him to weakly call me back and say 'especially if it is an Alfonso Bescia space opera, those are particularly crap'.

I have subsequently watched several Italian sci-fi films over the years, four of which have been Alfonso Brescia efforts. I should have followed my great great grandfather's advice as watching all four Brescia films has been as much fun as being hit full on the face with a bag full of broken glass. This one like all of them feature space wars in which the villains are androids who look like Brian Jones of the Rolling Stones circa 1968. In this one we have an evil despot called Kress who uses his android army to enslave mankind; he is opposed by a small group of stereotypes and robots, who save the day. The date of this film should give you a clue that it is surfing the wave of Star Wars and to that end there is a light-saber battle where the Brian Joneses fight our heroes. Well, I say 'light-saber' but given the origins of this film, it should be no surprise to learn that technically it is a 'cardboard swords painted with fluorescent paint' battle. Interestingly the technology magazine Popular Mechanics reviewed this movie back in the day declaring it a 'dreadful trashpile'. A final note for film academics, the title this one went under in West Germany was 'Metallica'.

Well, as an Italian American, I am obligated to at least try to see the myriad of Italian space flicks; this being one of the worst.

I LOVED Mario Bava's Planet of the Vampires, and his other very hip and "neato"(as in "gee that's real neato, Batman!") BUT this one is watchable only for the costumes, the babes, and the pretty good ships effects.

I DID love(and still own) War of The Robots", which has a good story and a good "family feeling" among the characters who make up the spaceship crew and their alien allies.

If you like hot Italian babes, post "Space 1999" space uniforms, and ships, you will like this film If you want a good story or even a semi-well written one, steer clear of this one!

This has to be one of the worst films I've experienced so far from my trusty Mill Creek 50-film 'Nightmare Worlds' pack (on twelve double-sided DVDs, no less), and it did a further injustice at being way too long. Usually these turn out to be just over an hour, so if it's an unpleasant bore, all you have to do is blink and it's over, but this was almost two hours long. There were many ways in which the filmmakers tried to rip off and cash in on much better films--you can tell that their C3PO-type robot, that's supposed to be the perfect bartender, was designed using a garbage can; and the English title distinctly culls from both 'Star Wars' and '2001: A Space Odyssey', both legendary masterworks of the genre. Yet there WERE some interesting ideas of merit, which much better scriptwriters and directors could have really done fine things with (intergalactic auctions of planets being but one of them), so I couldn't discount the film altogether. I'm simply glad it's over and done with, and I will never bother watching it again.

In conclusion, it's only worth a look if you REALLY like bad films or sci-fi and don't mind that it's very poorly made--otherwise, give it a wide berth and simply move on.

I have no idea what the writer and director were thinking with this piece of drek but it could'nt be storytelling. The story (what there is of it) is a shallow mess, the effects could have been done by a 5th grade class, and the acting is incredibly wooden. If Ed Wood had still been alive when this was made this would have easily made 2nd place to plan 9 from outer space as the worst movie ever made. If you enjoy the type of movies shown by mystery science theatre 3000, then this is for you. I found myself frequently yelling "HYKEBA" during the sword fight scenes and making other comments throughout. the effects rival anything by Ed Wood and might even be worse because they try to use (primitive) computer graphics. I would rather watch Ed's flying hubcaps then the crappy Nintendo graphics used here.

The biggest problem in this movie, among a myriad of issues, is that it's clearly edited out of order. Not in a stylistic way, but like it was accidentally dropped in a wood chipper and hastily taped back together. Add atrocious costumes, comical looking villains, and a horribly unfunny pair of married robots (it's not as great as it sounds) and you have a truly painful film to watch.

If you're a fellow B or bad movie fan looking for a funny bad film, this isn't it. It tries to be funny and that makes it even more painful. Some of you are gonna watch it anyway, and your going to regret it.

1st watched 5/1/2010 – 2 out of 10 (Dir-Al Bradly): Very bad battle against an alien race movie that takes bits&pieces from the Star Wars epic and changes them slightly but otherwise is just a badly made movie for any genre. The movie appears to be an Italian-made film and the version I watched was dubbed. The story involves the earthlings first encounter with an alien race which turns out violent as they destroy our first ship that comes into contact with it, then bombs targets on the ground, and starts taking away different races of people for their own slave trade business. This group ends up being one of many planets in an interstellar planetary system and they won an auction for our planet. The spaceship is made up of an impenetrable substance called indiron and a group of scientists and other folk are assembled to figure out how to defeat the ship. This quest is the main plot of the movie until they find the answer and then the ensuing fight against them occurs. This is a poorly acted, poorly made movie with very poor special effects and it's only redeeming part is the unique storyline. There is also a bickering man and woman robot pair that's supposed to provide comic relief but doesn't. The movie is pretty much a waste of the little amount of money it was made with. I guess they were trying to cash in on the Star Wars craze(I hope they made some money for themselves but I won't contribute to their profits and you shouldn't either).

Star Odyssey is an 1979 Italian Sci-Fi Semi Space Opera, which cannot make up its mind if its serious or a comedy or both. Earth in the future is under invasion. It is sold in auction to the same Evil leader (whose face is built of gold mosaic squares), that's doing the invading. They are abducting people to be sold on the galactic slave market. All the men at earth defenses either wear mustaches or have male pattern baldness. There is a reclusive bald headed master scientist, with extensive psychic abilities, who can save the world, but first must put together his 'team.' It includes his busty nice, two escaped scientists prisoners from THE Alcatraz of the heavens, a lover boy and cheating gambling addict, a human acrobat who prize-fights with robots, and two suicidal robots salvaged from the junk yard (who are not the smartest tin cans in the world). There is of course, a lot pseudo-light saber fighting( they are cardboard swords with fluorescent paint), and a lot of circus music. The movie is also know as Space Odyssey, Metallica, Captive Planet, and Seven Gold Men In Space. I swear I cannot make this up.

My review is that this movie is not good. But Tilly & Tilk are the greatest robots in cinematic history. They are the most genuine and heartwarming depiction of true love I've ever seen in fiction and the movie is worth enduring for them alone. Also the guy who is constantly doing gymnastics for no reason.

I think this is the worst movie ever made, the worst it could ever be. The actors, the direction, the story, everything is of the worst quality. Ten stars minus!