Chapter Text
Severus had never kissed a woman before. Nobody during his Hogwarts days wanted to kiss the freakish boy whose only interests were books, the Dark Arts, and potions. As an adult, spying had prevented him from forming any meaningful romantic attachments. It was too dangerous to bring anyone into his life, and he was too emotionally unavailable to give any woman what she needed. After the war, he feared having any romantic entanglements plastered all over The Daily Prophet. Over time, he accepted that other people kissed and fell in love. Severus Snape was destined to be alone for the rest of his existence.
Yet here he was, holding Ella in his arms, his lips pressed against hers, reveling in the aroma of her subtle cinnamon and lilac perfume along with the sensation of her body melting into his. Merlin, if she was the woman he hoped she was, then he wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of eternity with her.
Ella broke away, her eyes glistening. She breathed, “That was amazing.”
“It was unlike anything I’ve ever experienced." He ran a hand through her hair, noting how it felt even softer than he'd imagined it to be.
“I’ve never experienced anything like that either.” She leaned her head against his chest. “I didn’t ever want it to end.”
“It doesn’t have to.” He kissed the top of her head. “If you let me know who you are, I will remain in your life for as long as you’ll have me.”
Her eyes grew as she paled. He swallowed and wondered if he was being too forward. There was no guarantee she would want to be with him come midnight when she learned who he was underneath his mask. Best not to get his hopes up, lest he do something foolish like tell her he'd been falling for her for quite some time and wanted to be by her side forever.
“I don’t know if you’ll want me when the clock strikes midnight.” She shifted her eyes away from him. “I may not be who you think I am.”
He didn’t dare say aloud who he suspected her of being, or at least who he hoped she was. If he was correct, the revelation may alarm her. If he was incorrect, he’d only succeed in making a fool of himself in front of the only woman who had kissed him.
“I’ve told you some of my faults, but I have others.” She met his eyes. “Unlike you, I’m not wealthy, and I don’t have the highest social standing. Nobody would ever accuse me of being a princess.”
Severus huffed. “Trust me, my social standing is not high, nor am I considered a prince.”
“I think you are,” she answered in a quiet voice.
“Do you even know who I am?”
She bit her lip the same way Hermione had in the cafe. His heart fluttered.
“Despite everything that has happened tonight, I am not Prince Charming,” he answered. “In fact, many would say I am a surly, difficult man who does nothing but destroy everything good in his life. As for social class, I was not always wealthy. Rather, I created my own wealth after years of abuse and toil.”
She hummed.
“I couldn’t care less about any of your faults.” He leaned closer to her. “I only want you as you are.”
“You don’t even know me.”
“I know more than you think. I was a spy after all.” He captured her lips once more.
Ella pulled him closer, her body responding to the kiss. This kiss was even more passionate than the last one. For a man who’d been starved of touch for so long, this was like a feast after a long trek home. He wanted more. Everything within him wanted more of her.
Before he could consider his next move, the chimes of the bell began to ring. She broke away, her eyes wide.
“Midnight,” Severus whispered before reaching for her mask. “Time to see who you really are.”
“No.” She jumped back. “No, you can’t see me.”
“Why?”
“You,” her eyes darted around. “You just can’t.”
“But I think I already know you,” he began.
“No, no, you don’t.” She stumbled back as the bell tolled louder. “You don’t know anything about me.”
“I do know you.” He approached her. “If you would just...”
“I need to go.” She fled from him.
“Wait!” He chased after her while the other guests removed their masks and cheered.
“Come back.” Severus chased her as fast as his legs could carry him. “We need to finish this conversation!"
She looked back, a tear in her eye. “I’m sorry. I need to go.”
“But…”
“I can’t watch you abandon me when you realize I’m not who you want!”
“I won’t do that, I promise!” He called.
She leapt into her sleigh.
"Where to, Milady?" The butler asked.
"Home." She signaled for the butler to go as quickly as possible.
“Wait!” He shouted.
She disappeared into the night.
He chased her for a couple more steps before shouting, “Hermione! Come back!”
Blowing snow obscured her from view.
The cold sliced through his robes as he stared into the night. A few minutes ago she had been in his arms, kissing him. For the first time in his life, he had everything he wanted and needed. Yet she’d abandoned him in the name of protecting herself.
Could he have misread the situation? Did she think he was someone else? Was she just another woman who didn't want him?
Realizing pursuing her was futile, he trudged up the stairs, only to find her glass slipper. He stared at it, wondering if that was the last item of hers he’d ever see.
“Well.” Minister Tremaine marched down the stairs with a glisten in her eyes. “I guess your perfect little Ella didn’t want to be the Half Blood Princess after all.”
Severus picked up the glass slipper and held it tight. Somehow, he was going to prove to Hermione that he wanted her as she was. Someway, he was going to find her and tell her that he was serious about wanting her to be by his side forever. Someday, she would know how much he’d grown to care for her.
All he needed to do was find her and concoct a plan to prove her heart was safe with him.
***
Halfway home, the sleigh shrunk, returning to a blown glass ornament. The horse became a rat, which scurried away, pleased with its newfound freedom. Crookshanks returned to his feline form and glared at Hermione, whose dress and shoes had returned to their ragged messes.
She glanced at her outfit, so out of place at such a high-class ball. Then again, she was out of place at that ball. Everyone around her appeared so wealthy, so refined, and so sophisticated. In the meantime, she was just Hermione, a bossy muggleborn with a dead-end job and a boss who went out of her way to sabotage her by destroying her original dress.
Still, she had two kisses with Severus. Because of that, she would cherish the night forever.
A tear fell from her eye at the thought of wanting more time with Severus. Had she been bolder, she may be with him now. Then again, he may see her dirty, drab clothes and decide he did not want her after all. No, a life with him was never meant to be. All they had were a few conversations, a cup of coffee, and a memorable ball. Yet, love could not be built on Christmas magic. It was built on respect and care for who the person truly was. Severus knew who Ella was, but he did not know who Hermione was. Thus, she and Severus could never be, no matter how much she wished it was otherwise.
Taking a shaky breath, Hermione grabbed Crookshanks and apparated home, trying to eliminate the nagging feeling that if she let Severus know her, she could have the love she’d always desired. All she needed to do was be courageous, something that at the moment, she was not.
Thus, Christmas became a bittersweet holiday.