Chapter Text
Cas slowly wakes up from his nap, though a glance at the clock alerts him to the fact his short nap turned into sleeping past dinner and well into the night. With the way his stomach is rolling, he’s sure he wouldn’t be able to keep any food down right now anyway so it’s not much of a loss. The red letters on the clock read 1:43 AM, glowing brightly in the deep darkness of the room. Still, sleep was better than spending the night ruminating on the days events. With sleep came the peace of forgetting Dean betrayed his trust, forgetting he’s now the only resident of the home they built to live in together. The absolute silence of the house feels like that of a tomb, Cas is half expecting some sort of dark entity to come forward seizing him and pulling him back into the shadows with it. He half wonders if that would be such a bad thing.
Cas rolls over and grabs his phone, attempting to distract himself from his maudlin thoughts, to see several missed texts from Gabe, Meg, and Charlie checking in on him. Unsurprisingly, he also has several from the Winchesters. His heart clenches at the reminder he’ll no longer be a Winchester, the wedding is most definitely cancelled and he’s sure Dean’s taking his family back in this pseudo-divorce. We can have shared custody of Charlie. Cas’ dark humor amuses him, though not enough to actually crack a smile or laugh but it’s the small boost he needs to help him out of bed. He continues scrolling as he shifts into a seated position, bare feet hitting the cold hardwood floor and shooting a shiver through him. Cas' surprised when he gets to Sam’s text. So much so he almost drops his phone.
From Sam: I would’ve called but I’m not sure it’s okay anymore. Dean told me what he did. I just wanna say you’ll always be my brother even if Dean’s a complete asshole. Not sure that you care and I’m not trying to poke at any fresh wounds but he’s staying here, I gave him a week to find a new place though. I feel like I’m rambling and maybe I’m still shocked but I needed to make sure you know we’re still family, that goes for all of us Cas. We’ll be by tomorrow to pack up the rest of Dean’s things and take them to storage if that’s okay? We can talk more later if you want but we all love you, Cas. I’m so sorry my brother’s an emotionally stunted idiot, it doesn’t begin to make any of this okay but I had to say it. Talk soon, but I understand if you need your space right now.
As he scrolls he sees the rest follow about the same tune. As far as the Winchesters are concerned Dean’s extreme error in judgement changes nothing. Each message buoys his spirits just enough to make the ache in his chest lighten up a bit. Cas stands, running a hand through his messy hair as he heads downstairs for a glass of water and continues to read.
From Adam: I can’t make any excuses for Dean because there are none. What I can do is tell you I love you and I’m here for you, bro. Anytime you need to talk, doors always open.
From John: I always hoped my boys wouldn’t repeat my mistakes but here we are. Son, I got no clue what to say other than I’m sorry. I truly am. Kate sends her love as well.
From Bobby: Always said that boy was an idjit and then he had to go and prove it. Damn shame is what it is.
The final text, and the one he’s most afraid to read, is from Mary. Cas makes his way from the bottom of the stairs to the kitchen as he mentally prepares himself for whatever it might say. He leans against the counter, finally gathering enough nerve to open it.
From Mary: In my heart, you’ve been my son since you leveled those big blue eyes on me and assured me you weren’t a danger to Dean all those years ago. I love Dean more than words but I guess it turns out it wasn’t you I should have been worried about. I’m so sorry honey and I know that does nothing to ease the hurt you’re going through right now. I’ve got the unfortunate edge of having been there myself. So, this is what we’re going to do. Live. Live like no one’s ever broken our hearts, live for the moments that make us joyful even if it feels like you’ll never feel happiness again, live even if it’s day by day, live for the small things that show us we’re not alone. We’re gonna live, okay? And I’ll be there at your side the whole way, if you want me to. I love you sweetie, so much. We’re gonna get through this I promise, and I don’t break those. All my love and support, talk soon.
Cas allows gravity to pull him down as he slides ungracefully to the floor in front of the sink. His thin pajama pants are no match for the cold radiating from the floor but it barely registers in the moment. The phone clatters as it falls from his sweaty hands, hitting the tile as fresh tears fill his eyes. Not a single one of them is abandoning him, honestly considering Bobby’s penchant for mumbling ‘family don’t end in blood' at the most random of times it shouldn’t surprise him. But, Cas is relieved all the same. He’s not sure he would have survived losing the only family he has left, besides Gabe, Anna, Charlie, and Meg, in one day. After a few minutes, and several tissues later, Cas picks himself up and dusts himself off. Mary’s right, just because Dean royally fucked up that doesn’t mean Cas has to fall apart. Like any good mother, she always knows exactly what to say. No, he’s going to live, despite the heartache and loss attempting to open a void in his soul. Thanks for the plan, Mom.