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It’d been over two weeks, and they’d barely even uttered a word to eachother. Leah didn’t know if that was a good thing, or a bad thing. She didn’t know if she’d be able to handle it. She could handle the casual “hello’s” and “how are you’s”, but only because she was professional. Anything not required due to her job, she couldn’t do. No small talk, nothing.
So, Leah spent the majority of those two weeks with Lia and Mariona. It felt like third wheeling a bit, but most of the rest of the team gravitated toward Jordan.
Katie and Caitlin of course did, meaning so did Kyra.
Leah expected Beth to, and she did, so Steph usually ended up with Jordan as well.
Laura, Alessia and Lotte were sort of 50/50. Sometimes Laura just followed Beth around, other times she did not. Alessia mostly just stuck with Kyra, but she also felt guilty, so she sometimes stayed with Leah. Lotte really changed who she went to every second day. She didn’t totally mind where she ended up. It was all the same to her, anyway. Viv was gone.
Most of the others didn’t really care where they go, they just ended up with Jordan, or on their own.
That day at lunch, Leah was sitting with Lia, Mariona, and Codina. Leah ate wordlessly, throwing a glance toward Jordan’s table every few minutes. Usually she’d be laughing with Katie or Caitlin. What is seriously so funny? The fact that Jordan left her for more game time to have a higher chance at going to the World Cup, just to get no minutes?
Lia tried to include Leah in the conversation, but she really couldn’t care less. She tried to involve herself, to actually pay attention to the words being said, but she just couldn’t.
Why was she being so petty, so annoyed? I mean, she knew why. Jordan left. But it’s been over a year, she should be over it. Jordan’s got Erin, she’s got Elle… They both moved on. What’s the point of being petty if the result is still the same?
“Listen, guys, I appreciate you always having room for me given… that situation, but I need to try and move on. I’m going over there.” Leah smiled.
”Oh. Are you ready for that?” Lia furrowed her brow slightly.
”Probably not. But what’s the point of being petty? The result remains the exact same.” Leah shrugged. She looked at the other three once more before getting up, grabbing her plate and walking away. There was a spare chair at Jordan’s table, so she made her way over. Once over there, all the table stared at her.
”Leah?” Beth asked.
”Yeah. Um, hi.” Leah paused. “Can I sit here?”
Katie and Caitlin looked at Jordan as she was sandwiched between them, an unsure look in their eyes. But to their surprise, Jordan responded.
“Yeah, of course.” Jordan said, a smile following.
As leah sat down, a grateful grin tugging at her lips, she felt a sense of… comfort. Sure, it’s not the same as it was, and may never be, but it’s normal. Comforting.
”We were just talking about our chances of winning something other than the Conti Cup this year.” Steph spoke up.
”A girl can dream.” Leah laughed, continuing to eat her lunch.
“That’s what I said!” Jordan exclaimed, surprised at how in sync they still were. Leah chuckled in surprise.
”No matter the outcome, this’ll always be my club, my home and my family, though.” Leah smiled.
”I’d say the same, but I left. I gave it all up.” Jordan looked down at her hands.
The table looked at her sadly, not saying anything. Why weren’t they saying anything? Do they blame her? Before Leah could stop herself, words were coming tumbling out of her mouth.
”Don’t do that to yourself, Jordan. You’re only human. You did the right thing. You left to a club where you’d get game time, so you could go to the World Cup. Maybe you got no minutes, but you still put in the effort. We don’t blame you, do we?” At all the scattered murmurs and collective nods, Leah continued. “See? So don’t blame yourself. We care for you just the same.”
Jordan looked at her, glossy eyes slightly wide.
”Do you mean that?” Jordan asked.
Leah looked back into the teary eyes, and smiled warmly. “Of course.”
Jordan smiled at that, and they got on with lunch and cheerful chatter.
Afterwards, they were in the locker room before making their ways to the gym. Leah was trying to make sure her and Jordan were the last two in the locker room. Of course she expected it to be a difficult task. Everyone would want to be with Jordan, and it’d be weird for them to be in a room on their own. But she still tried to give them privacy.
Eventually, pretty much everyone made an exit. So, Leah jumped at the opportunity infront of her.
”Jordan.” Leah said firmly, turning her whole body to look at the older woman.
”What?” Jordan asked, looking back at Leah.
”It’s just- I’m sorry, if it seemed I was giving you the cold shoulder. Maybe I was. But I’m still sorry. It’s just- you left me — us — behind, and I couldn’t ignore that fact, or put it aside to have normal conversations with you. I was just professional. But now, I’m ready to put in the work to… mend our friendship, kind of? I mean, we won’t get back to where we were straight away, but we can work our way to being somewhat like it. Just…not the girlfriend thing.” Leah rambled on.
Jordan raised her eyebrows. “I mean, I was almost certain we silently agreed to do that, with you sitting with me and that speech and all that. But anyway, it’s okay. I get it. I left you, I left my friends, I left this club. And if it hurt me how much it did, I can only imagine how it felt for you. After I left, I replayed the whole situation in my head but each time had the same outcome. Both of us heartbroken. But I’d be happy to try and fix the problem I caused. I’d be rather over the moon to be friends with you again.”
Leah smiled warmly. “I don’t want anything more.”
”I’m so glad.” Jordan grinned.
The both of them grabbed their water bottles and began the walk to the gym together. There was no tension, there was no unsaid words (except, maybe there was), there was no hurt feelings, and certainly no pettiness. Just Jordan and Leah, walking the halls like old times.
”So how’s Blu?”