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Earth-616
There’s so many lies and myths about those early days. Sometimes even I forget what’s true.
I figure I owe you something that no one else knows, but me. It was World War II, when Steve and I were the Sentinels of Liberty, Defenders of Freedom. We were the first ‘costumed heroes’ leading the war effort. But it wasn’t just us for very long. The Sub-Mariner joined us - some kind of waterbreathing elf-King. I’d be lying if I said he wasn’t hot, but he was incredibly arrogant and had this weird superiority complex. He had this short, flat dark hair and only ever wore these skimpy, green trunks that looked like fish scales. Then a man made of fire , known as the Human Torch joined us. When he wasn’t on fire, he was pretty hot anyway. He had short, strawberry blond hair and a very square jaw. Apparently he was a robot, but I’m still not convinced. He was so lifelike and had a wicked sense of humour. He was cool, I liked him a lot. He wore this fire retardant jumpsuit. He had a sidekick called Toro as well, who… also caught on fire. Apparently catching on fire was a good thing nowadays? He was 16 when he joined, which is crazy - how the hell was he allowed out here? But he was funny and we got along pretty well. He had black, wavy hair and would wear a yellow jumpsuit. And here I was, just some kid in a stupid mask. We were known as the ‘Invaders’ , dubbed by Churchill.
But guess who felt like the odd one out?
We were somewhere in Poland, early 1942, when my anecdote starts. I was scouting up ahead for the Invaders and a squad of soldiers. The binoculars lenses I looked through were infrared. But as I looked through to a Nazi base, (whilst balancing on some branches up a tree) I saw it was all up in flames.
“Cap, I got nothing here. It looks like somebody took out these bastards before us.” I told Steve through a walkie talkie. My crush on Captain America was still very much prevalent. I wished it wasn’t, but somehow Steve was making something as dire as a war in the snow feel warm.
“That doesn’t make any sense, Bucky. Our intel was supposed to be as solid as a rock.” Steve said.
“Well that rock’s turned to sand, Cap.” I sighed. “I’m gonna head back so we can-” Suddenly I heard him shouting from a distance. He was yelling to people ‘Get down!’ Before I heard a loud explosion and gun fire through the tiny speaker.
“Cap? Cap what's happening?!” I said into the walkie talkie, scared.
It was a trap . No matter how fast I ran, I knew I’d be too late. When I returned to the little camp that my team had set up in a little forest clearing… there was just devastation. Fire decorated the surrounding trees and a few dead or injured soldiers were lying across the snow. Blood splattered against the white, making it a harsh contrast even with the orange glow radiating from the flames.
“It-It was crazy…” A soldier said, wrapping bandages around the gunshot wound through his leg. “There was nothing and then… They came outta nowhere. It was a firefight.” He explained.
“And what happened to Cap and the others? What happened?” I asked, nervously.
“When it started there was some sort of blast and they just collapsed.” He said. That’s when I spotted Steve’s shield lodged into the bark of a tree. Captain America never would’ve left it behind. But I knew they weren’t dead. I figured if they were, they’d have been left here. No, they were taken.
“I’ve gotta go save them.” I told the remaining soldiers. I was talking big, but I had no idea what I was going to be able to do.
Maybe I’d have more confidence, if just three weeks earlier I hadn't fucked everything up. The Invaders were flying in a small jet, piloted by Steve and Jim Hammond, aka the Human Torch. Namor the Sub-Mariner was using his keen senses to scan the landscape beneath us.
“Seen anything, Namor?” Steve asked.
“No. But if my betraying Kingsmen are here, they'll know the vengeance of their ruler.” Namor said. I never really understood what the aquatic Prince was saying for the most part.
“Here goes the thesaurus rex.” I scoffed, referring to his normal ‘Imperius Rex’ nickname he was given back at home. It made Toro laugh.
“I heard that, Barnes.” Namor growled at me. “If sarcasm were a super power, perhaps you’d actually carry your weight on this team.” Namor told me.
“Ouch.” I said, before sadly looking away. I was quiet after that. Namor had this ability to get under your skin without even trying.
“I see something.” Jim said, finally breaking the silence. It was a Nazi submarine, resurfacing. Men were disembarking and making their way towards land, emerging from the seas and onto the sand.
“It doesn’t look good.” Jim added.
“Speak for yourself. It is a glorious sight!” Namor said, before opening the small jet’s hatch and diving out.
“Well, Toro, what’re we waiting for?” I smiled at the little matchstick. We both dived out of the plane as well. Toro’s body caught fire, except for his arms, which he used to hold me as we flew towards the sub. I had two handheld pistols out, ready to kill anyone sporting Nazi emblems.
“Drop me, now!” I told Toro, but he wouldn’t.
“There’s too many of them!” He said, unsure.
“ NOW! ” I insisted. Toro dropped me and I landed at the shore. Did I mention these Nazis were Atlantean? They had blue skin and pointy ears, as well as long, sharp swords.
“Hey fellas, nice swords!” I said- God I was so cocky. But I was quickly humbled. It didn’t take them long at all to disarm me. This one guy, this one big, beefy guy (at least that’s how I’m remembering him), took my skinny neck in his gloved hand and pinned me down into the sand. He held his sword against my Adam’s apple.
“Today is your last day, Surface-Worlder. Today you die!” He told me. It looked like he was wearing a gas mask, except he was using it to constantly be breathing water. So, using my quick thinking, I pulled the tube that went to his mouth away from his lips. He croaked and started wheezing as he stumbled away from me, quickly trying to fix it. But I wasn’t in the clear, I was surrounded by these ugly mermaids. One of them grabbed my ankle and dragged me towards him. I heard Steve’s voice shout over the army of Nazi fish.
“Namor! Get to Bucky! They’ll kill him!” Steve shouted.
“Urgh! He’s wasting my time!” Namor angrily barked. But the Prince of the marines swooped in, using the wings on his feet. It was like a damp whirlwind, attacking and bashing all of them away from me. As the dust cleared, the beach was abandoned, besides the unconscious Nazi soldiers.
“Did you catch him?” Namor asked Steve, as the star spangled stud came running over.
“No… U-Man disappeared.” Steve answered, but he was more interested in how I was doing. “Are you okay?” He asked me. I just nodded, humiliated.
“Fuck. This is unbelievable!” Namor said, furiously. “Leave your mascot behind, next time. We can’t fight a war and babysit at the same time.” He complained, before walking away in a huff. I looked up at Steve, sheepishly.
“What was that all about?” He asked me. I could tell he was frustrated with me.
“I just wanted to be like you guys. A hero.” I remember telling him. His face softened when he heard that.
“Bucky, you were a hero the minute you put that mask on. The minute you decided to put yourself on the line, to protect the free world.” Steve explained. “But you have to be careful. You’re no good to us, dead. I… I can’t let you die, James.” Steve told me. I nodded. I wished the sea folk killed me, because this guilt was unbearable.
So yeah, to say I was having trouble fitting in would be an understatement.
I was trying to prove myself, surrounded by the most powerful, super humans in the world. I was trying to prove I deserved a place in the ‘Invaders’. But sometimes leaping in blindly, you find exactly what you’re looking for.
It wasn’t until I crashed my motorbike, when I found the castle. Yeah, I fucked that up too. But I was desperate and on the hunt for the missing Invaders. I had been driving along this road that intertwined with the mountain peaks. I lost control of the bike, it rolled to its side and skidded out from beneath my legs until it crashed into a tree. I walked to the cliff’s edge with Steve’s shield strapped to my back and saw this huge, sprawling castle-like mansion nestled in the valley. I might’ve missed it if I didn’t stop, as the snow that caked its rooftops made it blend in. I managed to sneak into the castle (Nazis are dangerous, but not very vigilant). I made it into the rafters above a large, creepy looking laboratory. I couldn’t see much, but I saw a scientist. He was a bit chubby, baling and wore these rectangular glasses. He might’ve been in his mid to late 40’s. I heard someone call him Dr. Arnim Zola. I crawled through the shadows, staying out of sight and… God, it was way worse than I could have expected. In four circular tanks were the Invaders, all screaming and yelling in pain. The Human Torch and Toro were submerged in water, with oxygen masks keeping them alive. Namor was in a tank that had fire shooting from the floor, engulfing him in flames. Then there was Steve, who was coughing and wheezing in a green cloud of gas - whatever it was, it was keeping him weak. Suddenly I knew why the Nazis hadn’t noticed they’d missed an Invader in their trap. All of the tanks had wires and tubes, all connecting to this shirtless man on a medical table. He was strapped down and being injected with everything that made my teammates special. They were only using the Invaders they needed for their experiment. I knew that this time, leaping blindly was my only option. I fell from the rafters and onto the ground, determined to save my friends. Zola’s test subject stood up from his medical table, looking a bit dazed and confused. I crept up behind a couple of Nazi soldiers and bashed their heads together. They both fell to the floor and Zola heard.
“Vas is-?” He gasped as he looked over.
“Hey guys!” I said, feigning confidence. The lab rat came storming towards me. He was bulging with muscles, with tubes still connected to his chest, arms and back. He had blond hair, shaved on the sides of his head and wore only a pair of military pants and boots. I took out my gun and immediately started firing at him, but it was no use. This thing made his hand catch on fire and used his flames to melt my bullets before they could rip through his skin. This monster was given the speed of Cap and Namor combined . He pounced onto me, overwhelmed with his newfound power. I think I noticed he was froffing at the mouth, but maybe I was just seeing things. With his speed, there was no way I could dodge as he threw me onto the floor. Although he was powerful, this creature was a newborn. He didn't know how to control his powers, his new body. He didn't have the control that the heroes have had years to hone. He was just flailing. Dangerous, yes, but an idiot. His fire was the trickiest thing to avoid, but luckily I had Steve’s shield to block it with. He accidentally caught some other Nazis on fire, who tried to run in and help. Their screams of pure agony was something I'll never be able to forget. I was still learning German at the time, but I was able to string enough words together that were shouted by Zola, to figure out that these powers weren't permanent. I know I couldn't last long against him, but I didn't have to last long. Just long enough for me to free my friends. He chased me around the lab, until I was at the perfect vantage point. I threw the shield so it could slice through the front of the glass tubes that held the Invaders captive and then smack Zola, who stood on the other side of the tanks, right in the head. It didn't kill him, it just knocked him out. Steve and Namor were coughing as they collapsed to the floor, while the damp matchsticks scrambled to remove their oxygen masks. The lab rat had caught up and grabbed me by the front of my jacket. PUNCH! WHAM! POW! He punched me across the face, but if there was one thing I was good at, it was taking a punch .
“I can do this all day.” I mumbled, barely clinging onto consciousness as I spat blood.
“No. Now, you die!” The lab rat told me, holding up a fist of fire.
“Not on my watch!” Steve said, before using his own intense and powerful strength to punch the lab rat off his feet. He fell to the ground, immediately unconscious.
“Awe, c’mon Cap. You gotta make me look that bad?” I groaned, wiping blood away from my chin.
“Sorry, pal. I called dibs on him before you got here.” Steve chuckled, before giving me a hug. I remember it as clear as day.
“I'm proud of you.” He told me. I remember the chills that ran through my body and the relief those words gave me. Suddenly, nobody’s approval of me mattered, but Steve’s.
“You okay?” He asked me, helping me to sit down on the medical table.
“Yeah. Yeah, I'm okay.” I nodded. “Might've busted a rib or two, but no biggy. What about you guys?” I asked, looking over to Namor, the Human Torch and Toro. Namor looked like a charred marshmallow, but he didn't even look that hurt. Jim and Toro, however, looked quite weak and tired.
“A little whooshy, but no permanent damage.” Steve told me.
When we finished waiting for reinforcements to come take our prisoners, we watched the Human Torch melt all of Zola’s machinery down to sludge. Steve tied the Doctor and his test subject up - they looked so helpless now. I realised that, even with a couple busted ribs, I felt amazing. I did it. I saved the Invaders, all on my own. Even Namor gave me a compliment… kind of.
“I hope you aren't too injured to walk, Barnes.” Namor told me. “None of us will be carrying you anymore.” He added, as he walked away. It wasn't much, but it meant a lot to me.
The next day, Steve and I were in our tent, back at another camp. We were getting ready to go on our next mission- I don't remember what it was. Steve was just wearing a white tank top, his Captain America pants and boots. Something to do with a Nazi stronghold, maybe. A medic had wrapped some bandages around my waist that would help my ribs heal. I obviously wasn't going to have a big part in this next mission, in this condition, but I insisted on coming along. I was laying in my bunk, shirtless with my Bucky-red pants on, as he was putting things in a bag. We didn't exactly have much.
“I thought I lost you.” I said, after a long silence. Steve paused and turned around. Then the silence became awkward, before he spoke.
“I'm sorry. You… I never shoulda left you on your own.” Steve said, before sitting down on the edge of my bed, by my feet.
“You didn't leave me. You were captured. There’s a difference.” I reasoned.
“Yeah but I should've realised it was a trap sooner. I shouldn't have allowed that to happen.” Steve told me. His eyes looked wet and puffy.
“Steve, you can't account for everything and anything. They duped us all.” I told him. I never realised how much pressure Steve put on himself. God, I was worried about fitting in, while Steve was worried about getting us all out alive .
“I just… I care about you a lot.” Steve said, looking up into my eyes. His eyes were so blue, they looked like beautiful pools of diamond.
“I care about you too.” I told him. Steve’s eyes were flicking down towards my lips. Was this happening?
“I know you’re my partner. My fighting partner, but… I care about you more than that. You’re… You’re more than that to me.” Steve said, his voice was barely above a whisper.
“I feel the same way about you.” I told him, sitting up a bit. It hurt to do so, but fuck it was worth it. I think we both stared at each other’s lips - Steve’s were so pink and inviting at the best of times, let alone when the sexual, romantic tension was flooding our tent.
Then finally it happened.
Steve leaned in and pressed his lips against mine. Steve told me later that this was his first kiss and… well I could tell. It was a bit clumsy and awkward. I didn't really expect it from such a gorgeous heartthrob celebrity. He broke off, but I cupped his face and pulled him into a proper kiss. I guided him through it - for once I was the expert. I’ve had a few short relationships with girls, I knew how to kiss. Admittedly, this was my first kiss with a man, but I still knew what I was doing, for the most part. Our lips danced together as he grew more confident. He moved so he was more on top of me, wrapping one of his strong arms around my waist as our lips parted and tongues played. It was magical. It was incredible. I felt like my heart was about to explode. I could tell he was terrified and honestly… so was I. It was new. It was dangerous. It was taboo for the time, to put it lightly. When Steve eventually broke off, he pressed his forehead against mine. We were both blushing as red as roses.
“You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that.” Steve told me.
“Well I've wanted to do it longer. Ever since I saw these arms on the big screen.” I said, flirtatiously, giving one of his bulging biceps a squeeze. We both giggled quietly.
“Shit…” Steve sighed, looking bittersweet. “We’re really in trouble now.” But that didn't stop him from kissing me again.
Kissing me for minutes. Kissing me until Namor called for us outside, telling us to hurry up and get moving.
And that’s when things changed forever.