Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It’s not easy, but things never are. Nothing is all of a sudden all fixed up, there are still wounds that fester, anxieties that keep progress at bay. And yet, there’s a change. Lumine comes over thrice as often, a major improvement from her up to weeks-long pauses between seeing him. Sometimes, she brings homemade food for the two of them to eat together while Wanderer studies. Sometimes, the two of them spend the day simply talking, about nothing, about everything. But the biggest change is in him—how he allows himself to be.  

It’s the holding of hands, the pressing together of hips, the brushes of lips that can linger for minutes on end. Wanderer drowns in the affection that he so desperately tried to hold back, to push away. His fear is still present in the bite of his words, the tremble of his hands, how he tries and fails and tries and fails. But Lumine is there, she stays by him, by his side, becoming an anchor to his hurricane state of mind.

Though with their progress, Lumine struggles as well. A topic too close and she shuts down. She rather the conversation stayed on him than her, her walls so achingly tall, a mirror of his. Together, they build trebuchets and wield pickaxes to chip away at each other, to trust each other, even if that little more.

Wanderer never thought of himself as this kind of person; clingy, attached at the hip, desperate. He thinks himself as pathetic at times, how low he’s fallen from his high horse. He’s terrified of what he’s become under her sunlit eyes and fond smile. How much control she truly has over him.

“I’m scared, too,” Wanderer admits one night in his bed, the both of them wrapped up in blankets, wrapped in each other.

Lumine pulls him closer, presses his face to the crook of her neck as she kisses the top of his head. “I know,” she whispers back to him, holding him close. “I know, Shinji. I know.”

And without fail, the whisper of his name, the name she gave him, in such a fond tone unravels the knots between his shoulders. He melts into her, pressing kisses against the skin of her neck, shows his affection in the only way he knows how, the only way he’s comfortable to.

—

Lambad’s Tavern tends to become more rowdy as the sun gives its shine to the moon. Tonight, especially, seems to be a little louder with the talk of patrons, grating on Wanderer’s ears as he enters with his TCG deck clutched firmly in his hand. His eyes search over the seats, and upon finding what he was searching for, makes his way over.

“Congratulations!” the boys yell in varying degrees of enthusiasm as soon as they set their eyes on him.

Wanderer stares at them—at Kaveh, Cyno, Tighnari—as they hold up their drinks in celebration. Alhaitham is with them this time, minding his own business as he focuses his attention on the book in his hand.

“...What?” Wanderer asks, eyeing them all dubiously. His eyes dart to the exit, wondering if he should run from the forming dread.

“I heard from Lumine,” Tighnari supplies with a smug grin. “You two finally worked things out.”

Yep. He should definitely run. He can already feel how red his cheeks are getting, mouth twisting into a scowl as he backs away.

“Oh no you don’t!” Kaveh laughs, hand snatching onto his wrist and yanking him closer. Wanderer notices the flush on his cheeks, the empty mugs on the table. He scrunches up his nose at the burning smell of alcohol as he’s pulled into the seat next to Kaveh. Is he drunk? 

It’s too cramped—if he really wanted to, he could rip his arm away and bolt out the door. As he considers it, Wanderer’s eyes meet Alhaitham’s, and with a grim sigh he resigns himself to his fate.

“I guess you went from Cat Guy to Boyfriend Guy. Congratulations,” Cyno tells him with a lift of his cup.

Wanderer groans, everyone groans, and he resists slamming his head against the table. “If this is how you’re going to be, I’m out.”

“Aw, don’t be like that, Hat Guy!” Kaveh hiccups, wrapping an arm around his shoulder and tugging him in closer. “We should celebrate!”

“Okay, okay, give him some breathing room, Kaveh,” Tighnari says, noticing how Wanderer looks two seconds away from biting Kaveh’s arm off. Kaveh dramatically pouts, but lets Wanderer jerk away from him. “Sorry for dropping this on you, Hat Guy. I didn’t expect Kaveh to—”

“You’ve had enough,” Alhaitham cuts in, pushing away Kaveh’s drink.

Kaveh scowls at him, reaching back for the drink. “You’re not the boss of me, Alhaitham!” he hisses.

Tighnari watches their ensuing bickering with an exasperated expression, deciding ultimately to ignore their antics. “Anyway, the celebration was my idea. Considering now I don’t have to play matchmaker for another couple.”

Wanderer looks away, cheeks flush as he grimaces. “It really isn’t necessary,” he grinds out, embarrassed to high hell and back.

“I gotta admit though, I didn’t think I’d find out weeks later,” Tighnari continues. “You two were more private about it than I expected. I thought you’d be jumping for joy. I only found out because I asked Lumine about it.”

The memory of spinning Nekomata around in joy comes to the forefront of Wanderer’s mind. “Yeah, well. It never came up,” he grumbles.

Tighnari exhales a hefty sigh, shaking his head. “I remember asking you several times, though,” he laments. “You only ever wanted to play TCG. I should’ve known something had happened since you were all hush-hush about it.”

“Regardless, it’s a good thing,” Cyno adds. “I agree with Tighnari. It’s cause for celebration.”

Wanderer scowls at Tighnari. “How much did you tell him?” he asks, glancing at Cyno.

Tighnari shrugs a shoulder with a small smile. “Enough.”

Wanderer groans, rubbing his forehead.

“Relax, it wasn’t the nitty gritty personal things,” Tighnari clarifies. “I wouldn’t spread that stuff around.”

“I only knew you two were having some relationship issues,” Cyno tells him. “Which was obvious anyway.”

Wanderer wants to crawl into a hole and erase himself from Irminsul all over again. 

“I had no idea!” Kaveh pipes in, leaning back into Wanderer’s space. He takes a swig of the drink he wrangled back from Alhaitham. “You should drink up, Hat Guy! Drinks are on Alhaitham!”

Wanderer glances at Alhaitham. He doesn’t deny it, merely going back to focusing on his book.

“Fine,” Wanderer gives in. Kaveh beams. “I’ll have one drink.”

“If you’d like, Cat Guy,” Cyno begins, taking out his deck of cards. “Would you like to finally duel against me?”

Wanderer snorts with a feral grin, already slamming his deck down onto the table. “You’re on. I’ll wipe that stupid pun from your memory!” he practically snarls. For just a split moment, he considers a what-if, if he still had connections to Irminsul. He’d be able to erase it.

Kaveh pushes a drink towards him, and he eagerly begins to down it as Cyno sets up their game.

—

A few drinks or ten and an hour in later has the boys at various levels of—

“An’ then!” Wanderer shouts with a hiccup, slamming a hand on the table. Some of the dice roll onto the floor. “N’then she had the nerve to ask to be friends! Can— can you believe that! Friends!”

Cyno leans down to gather up the fallen dice. “Yeah,” he says, looking fairly sober.

Tighnari sighs, cheeks flushed a light pink as he holds a hand to his face, a little tipsy. “Sounds like her. Such a hopeless case,” he says, a fond touch to his voice.

Kaveh’s practically passed out at this point, leaning on Alhaitham, who hasn’t touched a single drink aside from some water. He mumbles something nonsensical, a grumble, a sigh.

“He’s right,” Alhaitham agrees in a deadpan tone.

“You understood what he said?” Tighnari asks, raising an eyebrow.

Alhaitam flips to the next page of his book. “No.”

Wanderer slumps over onto the table, cheek pressed to hard wood as he draws circles with a finger. “I wanna go see her,” he grumbles.

“You’re drunk,” Tighnari tells him, straightening out Cyno’s deck of cards and tucking them away. He gathers up Wanderer’s deck and does the same before sliding it back over to him.

Cyno puts a hand on Tighnari’s cheek—he leans into the touch. “You are, too,” he states.

Tighnari waves him off. “I’m fine, just a bit tipsy.” He turns his attention back to Wanderer. “We should get you home; you look just about ready to pass out like Kaveh over there.”

“M’ not drunk,” Wanderer slurs, shakily pushing himself up. He’s unsteady on his feet. The world around him wibbles and wobbles as he tries to focus back into reality. “I’m gonna go— hic— go see Lumine. I wan—wanna see her.”

Tighnari sighs with a shake of his head. “Cyno, can you help me?” he asks, getting up to walk over to Wanderer.

“Sure,” Cyno agrees, standing up as well. He glances over towards Alhaitham and Kaveh. “You should get him home, too.”

“I will,” Alhaitham says, not looking up from his book.

Tighnari slings an arm around Wanderer to keep him from falling over. “Next time, no drinking for you. I didn’t think you’d be such a lightweight. You only had half of what Kaveh did.”

“I’m not light,” Wanderer nonsensically huffs. “I’m—I’m—”

“Drunk,” Tighnari finishes for him. “Cyno?”

Cyno comes to Wanderer’s other side. “Lets go, Hat Guy,” he says.

Wanderer grins at him, a smug tug of the lips. His mind wades through tar, struggling to think of the words he wants to say. Cyno seems to catch on. 

“You fought valiantly,” he tells him. “I lost fair and square, so it's fair I kept up my end of the deal.”

Wanderer barks out a laugh; Tighnari winces, ear flicking. “Tha’s right!” he shouts. “I told you! I was gonna- I was- wiped the floor with you!”

Tighnari looks back towards Kaveh and Alhaitham, the former of which having begun to cling to Alhaitham like a koala. “You gonna be able to handle that on your own?”

“It’s nothing I haven’t dealt with before. You have your hands full,” Alhaitham replies. He snaps his book shut, lifting up Kaveh from the seat.

“I’m going back to Gandharva Ville tomorrow,” Tighnari tells him. “I’m sure he’ll be too dead tomorrow for me to see him, so tell him I say bye.”

Alhaitham grunts in the exertion it takes holding up Kaveh in all of his pretty boy glory. “Yeah. I will. Have a safe trip.”

Tighnari grins at him. “You too. Have a safe trip home. Alright—” He shuffles his grasp on Wanderer, holding him steady. “You ready to go?”

Wanderer furrows his eyebrows. “Where… where are we going?”

“We’re taking you home,” Cyno tells him.

“How do you—you… know where I live?” Wanderer struggles out.

“Lumine let it slip,” Tighnari says.

“I don’t wanna go home,” Wanderer pouts. Tighnari sends Cyno an amused glance.

“Tell you what,” Tighnari begins. “We get you home, and then I’ll go get Lumine for you. How does that sound?”

“Don’t wanna,” Wanderer mumbles. “Wanna just. See her. Miss her.”

Tighnari, honestly, wants to laugh. He can see the entertained smile gracing Cyno’s lips. “Yes, yes, we know. C’mon, let’s get going. Actually—” He turns his attention to Cyno. “Can you go get Lumine? We’ll meet you there.”

“At the Sanctuary, right?” Cyno asks.

Tighnari nods. “Mhm.”

“Yeah, I can do that,” Cyno agrees, following the two out the door. “See you in a few.”

Tighnari waves him goodbye with his free hand. He watches for a few seconds as Cyno walks away, before looking over to Wanderer, arm still slung around his shoulder.

“Okay,” he sighs, only a little exasperated. “Lets get you home.”

—

Tighnari stops in front of the Sanctuary, a little out of breath from supporting Wanderer the whole walk there. Damn Sumeru City and its inclines.

“Okay,” he breathes out. “We’re here. Do you wanna wait out here or go inside?”

Wanderer blinks harshly at the doors, squinting. “Inside’s fine,” he mumbles, sleep beginning to tug at his mind.

“Can you walk by yourself?”

“Mm,” Wanderer hums, taking a moment to process the question, before shaking his head.

“Alright.” Tighnari adjusts his hold on him, walking the two of them to the doors before using one hand to push it open. It doesn’t budge. “Ah. Damn, that’s heavy. Wait one second, Hat Guy.” He pulls away from him, grasping the handle of the door with both hands and yanking it open.

The ephemeral glow of the inside of the Sanctuary spills out onto them. Tighnari’s eyes widen a little. He’s never seen the inside before, had heard descriptions from Cyno and Lumine, but imagination pales in comparison to the utter beauty and elegance the place holds.

“Let’s get going already,” Wanderer grunts as he stumbles past him.

“Ah—right, sorry.” Tighnari easily catches up to him, the doors shutting firmly behind them. It feels like ages now, since their plan to free the Dendro Archon came to fruition. He can hardly imagine it, being locked up in a place like this for 500 years. It feels so grand. It feels so lonely. “So this is where…”

“I live, yeah,” Wanderer grumbles. He lets Tighnari put an arm around him again, and he leads them to a side door on the east side of the Sanctuary. They pause outside, Tighnari glancing down at Wanderer expectantly.

“Is this where I leave you?” he asks.

“Just open the door.”

Tighnari can’t help but smile, firmly pushing over the door and stumbling inside with Wanderer. Nekomata immediately meets the two of them, yelling and coming to rub up against their legs. 

“Hey, Nekomata,” Tighnari greets softly. “Sorry, my hands are a little full so I can’t pet you right now.”

“Let go already,” Wanderer mumbles, tugging himself away from Tighnari. He watches in amusement as Wanderer immediately hangs his hat onto the back of his desk chair, flops down onto the bed, and snuggles into the covers and pillows. Nekomata follows him soon after, coming to butt her head against his arm.

“Are you going to be okay when Lumine gets here?” Tighnari asks.

Wanderer seems to become a little more alert at that, sitting up. “She’s coming here…?” he asks, a little dizzy, a little slurred. He’s starting to sober up at least, Tighnari notes.

“Cyno went to get her,” Tighnari tells him. “You don’t remember?”

Wanderer pulls his lips thin, staring at Tighnari with narrowed eyes.

“You don’t remember,” Tighnari confirms, leaning against the door frame. He lets out a lamenting sigh. “Ah, damn, I should’ve told Cyno to bring some water with him.”

“It’s fine,” Wanderer mumbles. “She’ll bring some. She’s like that.”

Tighnari takes a moment to appreciate his surroundings, eyes running over the details of Wanderer’s room. The room itself, like the rest of the Sanctuary, is a beautiful green. A single light hangs from the ceiling, bathing them in yellow light. The walls are empty of any paintings or pictures, a little barren. Wanderer’s desk is pushed to the back of the room, and from where Tighnari stands, he can just barely make out stacks of books and study materials. There’s a tall shelf on the left side of the desk, housing various crafting materials that Tighnari recognizes—it’s the same stuff that Collei uses to make her dolls.

Against the left wall, across from Wanderer’s bed, is a large cat tree, almost big enough to reach the ceiling. At the top of the tree is a sturdy platform where an extravagant royal blue cat bed lays, decorated with elegant gold lining. On one side of the cat tree are two bowls—one white, one blue, each with similar gold decorations to the cat bed—with a large lidded bin filled with what Tighnari can guess is cat food. On the other side of the cat tree is what looks like a cat-sized version of a dog house. A litter box with some privacy, Tighnari assumes.

“You have a nice room,” Tighnari says, turning his attention back to Wanderer. He gets a mere grunts in reply as he flops back down onto the bed. “How did you get a room here? I didn’t even know they had rooms in the Sanctuary.”

Wanderer purses his lips. His head is still a little fuzzy from the alcohol, but it's gradually been getting easier to think. “It’s a long story.”

“Hmm,” Tighnari hums, deciding not to push it. “How did you and Lumine meet?”

Wanderer snorts. “An even longer story.”

“Don’t feel like sharing?” Tighnari asks.

Wanderer pauses. A moment. Two. His feels himself soften, expression becoming a little fond. “I was lost for a long time,” he murmurs. Even with two lifetimes, it's not a lie, it’s not a half truth. “She saved me.”

Tighnari smiles, a soft breath of a laugh leaving him. “She’s good at doing that. Saving people.”

“Yeah.” Wanderer can’t keep the affection out of his voice, dizzy with the alcohol running through him, dizzy with the thoughts of Lumine’s smile. Exhaustion tugs at the edges of his mind, threatening to slip him under.

A knock on the door interrupts the settling silence between them. “That must be her,” Tighnari says, turning to open the door. Sure enough, he’s met with Lumine’s surprised expression, a few lidded cups of water balanced in her arms.

She blinks up at him, glancing to Wanderer and back. “Tighnari? I, um, didn’t expect to see you.”

Tighnari takes a step back, opening the door wider to let her inside. He watches as an affectionate look replaces her confused one at the sight of Wanderer nodding off in his bed. “I decided to watch over him, just in case. He let me in,” he explains.

Lumine swivels around to meet him with a huge smile, elation running rampant in her chest. “Thank you so much, Tighnari. For taking care of him.” She begins to set the water cups on the desk. “I can take over now.”

“Sure thing,” Tighnari responds, heading out the door. “Make sure he drinks plenty of water and gets a good night's sleep.”

“I know how to take care of a hangover, Tighnari,” she laughs.

“Never said you didn’t,” he shoots back with a grin. “Oh—by the way, I’ll be heading back tomorrow, so I likely won’t see you again before I leave.”

Lumine nods. “Have a safe trip back.”

“Will do. Tell Hat Guy I said goodbye,” Tighnari tells her.

“Will do,” Lumine echoes. They give each other a wave before Tighnari closes the door, leaving the two of them alone. With a fond sigh, Lumine grabs one of the cups of water before wandering over to Wanderer’s bed and taking a seat. The bed creaks, and Wanderer blearily opens his eyes.

“Lumine…?” he mumbles.

Lumine’s heart flutters. She can relate to him—her name on his lips is a hit of ambrosia, spreading warmth through her body. “Hey,” she whispers, brushing his bangs out of his eyes. She nudges the water his way. “Drink up.”

Wanderer grunts, snuggling back into the pillows. “Too tired. Tomorrow,” he grumbles.

Lumine leans down, brushing her lips against his forehead in a soft kiss. “You need to drink water, or else you’ll regret it in the morning.” She leans back as Wanderer lets out a huff, begrudgingly sitting up. He wobbles a bit, firmly placing his hand on the bed to keep himself steady. Lumine holds the drink up to Wanderer, and he takes it from her, downing the cup in big gulps. “I didn’t know you could even get drunk. How much did you drink?”

“Enough. Not enough. Too much. I don’t know,” Wanderer mumbles. He leans into her, resting his forehead on her shoulder. “Missed you.”

Lumine’s heart clenches as he wraps his arms around her, tugging her in close to him. He nuzzles the crook of her neck; his hair tickles. Wanderer is usually clingy, but this is a whole new beast, she notes with an amused smile. With no small amount of affection, Lumine returns the embrace, holding him close.

“Shinji.” His name is a brush of air against the top of his head; she can feel him shiver in her arms. “Was this your first time drinking?”

“Mm-mm,” Wanderer hums in denial, shaking his head. His hair continues to tickle her; she has to suppress a giggle. “At the Harbinger meetings, there was wine. Not just wine. Vodka, too. I’d drink that. Not a lot.”

Lumine sticks out her tongue, grimacing at the imagined taste of pure vodka. “I’m surprised you can stand that. It’s so strong.”

“It’s bitter. I like bitter. Wine is too sweet,” Wanderer explains, pressing closer to her.

Lumine brings one hand up to begin rubbing his back. “The fact that you find wine sweet is just as surprising.” She hums in thought. “I don’t think you’d get along with Venti, then. He’s a wine addict.”

Wanderer pulls back just enough to look up at her, disdain painting his features. “The Anemo Archon?” he asks.

Lumine nods, the hand stroking his back coming to rest on his cheek. He looks a little torn, conflicted, glancing down at the Vision resting over his heart. Amused, she lightly nudges his face to bring his eyes back on her. “Do you want to meet him?”

“No,” Wanderer replies, immediate, definitive. “The Gods don’t give out Visions. He has nothing to do with me.”

Lumine raises an eyebrow. “How did you know that?”

Wanderer snorts. “Did you forget I nearly became God? A lot of research was put into it, a few things were uncovered.” He goes back to leaning into her. The sudden weight takes her by surprise, and she has to steady them both. “We need to work on your memory issues.”

“You’re so difficult sometimes,” Lumine breathes out. But the smile doesn’t falter, bleeding into her tone.

“You want me anyway,” Wanderer mumbles, sleep etching itself into his words.

“Alright, more water, before you pass out,” Lumine says, attempting to untangle herself from him.

“No,” he growls, pulling her back in closer. His grip is nearly crushing, pushing the air in her lungs out in a wheeze. “You’re staying.”

“Shinji,” she warns, voice strained.

Wanderer caves at the sound of his name, begrudgingly loosening his hold. As she gets up, his hands linger on her, until there’s nothing left for him to hold onto as they fall to his sides.

It takes all of two seconds for Lumine to bring back another cup of water, handing it over to him. He once again downs it in quick gulps, as if he were dying of dehydration. Can he get dehydrated? she wonders. Can he get hangovers? Is the water even going to help? She doesn’t ask.

As soon as he’s finished the drink, he tosses the empty cup onto the desk, just barely making it. Immediately, he goes back to wrapping his arms around her and pulling her in close.

“So clingy,” she teases.

“Don’t care,” Wanderer grumbles, giving her a squeeze. “You’re mine.”

“Yes, I am,” she says, placing a kiss on his forehead. “And you’re mine as well, Shinji.”

Wanderer’s breath hitches, and he leans back just enough for their breaths to intermingle. Eyes lidded, he stares into hers with rapt attention. He takes in the flush of her cheeks at their proximity, how she licks her lips while glancing to his. But she hesitates. He doesn’t.

“I want to kiss you,” he murmurs, hand coming up to brush against her cheek.

The edge of Lumine’s lips tug up into a smile. “Then what are you waiting for?”

The taste of alcohol meets her tongue not seconds later as he presses his lips against hers. Even with all the kisses they’ve shared, he still kisses her desperately, as if he’s afraid she’ll disappear from his hands at any moment. But she stays, has stayed, continues to stay, a firm fixation that consumes him. A soft whine leaves the back of her throat, and his passion doubles, triples. Her back meets the bed, his hands wander up and down her sides, across skin, holding her cheeks, and he thinks to himself:

This is perfect.

—

Wanderer doesn’t hole himself up in his room that much anymore. If he ever has plans to stay out for too long, for extra classes or library visits or TCG matches or the occasional commission run date with Lumine, he asks Nahida to watch over Nekomata for him. She’s, of course, more than happy to oblige, ready to spend the day spoiling the cat to heaven and back. Which is why when Lumine comes to him one afternoon, looking nervous as she rubs her arm, cheeks a slight pink, he already has a plan in place.

“I have a surprise for you,” Lumine tells him. “I think you’ll like it.”

Wanderer raises an eyebrow, setting down the book he was reading on his desk. “Oh?”

Lumine steps closer to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. He notices how her fingers tap against his skin, glancing down at the appendages before looking back up to her, curiosity piqued. “It’s in the teapot,” she says. “Do you… want to come see?”

Wanderer glances at the papers on his desk and promptly figures that Lumine is more important. “Now?”

Lumine mindlessly tugs at his sleeve, threatening to expose his shoulder. It drives him insane. “If that works for you? It’s okay if not.”

He hasn’t seen her this nervous in a while, not since they’d gotten together. It makes him nervous too, puts him on edge. Seeing her fidget, looking all cute like that, makes him want to drop her onto the bed and ravage her.

“This stuff isn’t due for a while,” he tells her, running his hands over his incomplete essay.

“You still have the pass I gave you, right?” she asks.

Wanderer reaches across his desk, moving some books out of the way and revealing the teapot pass that she’d given him not long after their literal kiss and make up. “Got it.”

“Then,” she exhales. “Let’s go.”

—

Wanderer doesn’t get to admire the space she’s made often. Having his own room in the Sanctuary, there’s never been a need to come here outside of letting his friends play with Nekomata.

That’s a weird thought, still. Friends.

He looks around the common area, appreciating the immaculate design. But. “This looks different,” he notes.

“Ah, I asked Kaveh for some pointers,” Lumine explains with a smile. “He helped out a lot. Looks nicer now, right?”

Wanderer scowls. “Kaveh was here?”

Lumine rolls her eyes. “Don’t worry, he didn’t go into the cat room. I know he’s allergic.”

“Good,” Wanderer huffs. “The last thing I want is for Alhaitham to come for my throat.”

Lumine raises an eyebrow. “You’re friends with Alhaitham now, too? That’s… unexpected.”

“We’re not,” Wanderer grunts. “We tolerate each other. He’s only ever around when Kaveh is. Pathetic, if you ask me.”

Lumine giggles; Wanderer feels a flutter in his chest. “Regardless, I’ll make sure he doesn’t come after you.” She walks closer to him, taking his hand in hers, with a small tug, she begins to lead him towards the stairs.

Wanderer huffs as he follows her. “It’s not like I couldn’t handle him.”

“Yes, yes, you’re the big strong Hat Guy,” Lumine teases as they ascend. “I’m sure you could handle anyone who comes your way. I remember the Interdarshan Championship.”

Wanderer scowls up at her. “Don’t call me that.”

Lumine pouts at him, coming to a stop at the top of the stairs. “No fun,” she protests. “I think it’s a cute name. It fits you so well.” She prods at the brim of his hat; he bats her hand away.

“Don’t you have something to show me?” he grumbles.

“Right. Yeah.” Her nerves seem to return as she leads him to a door. She begins to fidget again, gathering up her courage, before opening the door and revealing to him—

A room. A bedroom.

“Kaveh helped me with the design,” Lumine tells him, tugging him inside. The door automatically closes behind them. “But you’re free to move things around if you’d like.”

Even though Kaveh’s never been to his room, it looks almost identical. “Did you…”

“We based it off of your room in the Sanctuary. I just told him the layout, he came up with the rest,” Lumine clarifies. She turns to him, wearing a hesitant smile on her perfect face. “I’m… leaving for Fontaine soon.”

Wanderer’s breath hitches, his expression becoming distressed, torn. Lumine immediately cups his cheeks. “Hey,” she whispers. “Don’t panic. Hear me out, okay?”

He hesitantly nods in her hands, fear mixing with adoration as violet meets gold.

“I was thinking, since I won’t be able to visit as often in person anymore, we could meet up here instead,” she explains. “And I gave everyone else a pass, too, so you won’t have to rely on me if they ask to see Nekomata. You can bring her and anyone else here anytime. I know you already have a home in the Sanctuary, but… this could be your second home. A home away from home. A place for… us.”

Us. Wanderer can feel the pinprick of tears in his eyes. Lumine runs her thumb over his cheek.

“I also…” She drops her hands, coming to hold his, and leading him over to the desk pushed to the back of the room. On it lies a notebook, a pen sitting next to it. “I thought about, what if we’re not able to see each other, since I’ll be busy once we get there? And I came up with this.” With her free hand, she opens the notebook to the front page. A small cat is doodled in the top corner; it’s crude. It’s perfect. “If we miss each other, we can write a little note here.” She glances up at him. “What do you think?”

He thinks he loves her. He really, truly, absolutely loves her. Overcome with emotion, adoration, longing, he practically crushes her to his chest, holding her tight. He can feel the way her breath is squeezed out of her chest in an oof. “How are you so…” he croaks out.

Lumine laughs softly against him, her arms wrapping around him in turn. “I take it you like it, then?”

He can’t answer, hugging her impossibly tighter. How could he possibly explain how he feels? The elation? The raw emotion running through him? It’s impossible. The words simply don’t exist.

“I also made a spot for Nekomata,” she tells him. “She really loves you.”

Wanderer feels like his chest is about to burst. 

“I do, too. Love you, I mean,” she whispers against him, her lips ghosting against his neck.

Oh. He snaps. He breaks.

He can’t hold back anymore.

Wanderer crashes into her with all of the force of two lifetimes of desire, of the need to be wanted. A shocked, strangled gasp comes from the back of her throat, but her surprise is quickly thrown to the wind. Her arms come up around him to cradle his face, and she kisses him like it's all she’s ever dreamed of. 

“Again,” Wanderer mutters into her mouth, words muddled each time their lips meet. “Say it again.”

Lumine places her next kiss on the curve of his jaw, her breath hot in a way his never is. “I love you, Shinji. I love you.”

He kisses her before he can do something stupid, like start laughing in disbelief. Even so, their teeth clack as he fights to restrain his smile. He’d rather die than stop kissing her, would rather erase himself from Irminsul all over again than lift his hands from her waist. Lumine bites his lip and he decides nothing else matters but the sigh she releases when he squeezes her hips in response. He wants to bottle that sigh and drink it like a tonic. He wants to play it back in real time again and again, to elicit all of the noises she makes while drunk on pain and pleasure. He wants to hear them all, every single one, memorize her outside and inside, her entirety and all it encompasses. 

“I love you,” he rasps against her lips, overflowing, overheating, kissing her again and again. “I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you—” Each declaration is punctured with another kiss, eating up her small moans and gasps as she writhes against him. In just a few steps, he pins her against the desk, listens to her resounding whimper as he rocks his hips up into hers. The hands splayed on her hips drag down to the underneath of her thighs; she gets the memo, shuffling up to sit on the desk as he settles himself between her legs. Their lips never part for more than a second, fire raging through him.

Lumine’s arms slide up further to fully wrap around his head, curling her fingers in his hair. One of her legs wraps around his waist, pulling him closer into her, the heat pouring through as they press together. And he can feel it, through the brushing of skin against skin, his hands running over the bare of her back, how much she burns, how much she craves this just as much as him. 

“Shinji—the book—” Lumine manages to say between kisses. He parts from her long enough to notice the pages of parchment now crumped, the book and quills set askew. He has a moment of regret for all of her hard work and reaches out to shoves the notebook a safe distance away. Satisfied, he glances back to Lumine for validation only to be met with the sight of her kiss swollen lips, bright red and glossy with their shared spit. Her chest heaves as she catches her breath, and he doesn’t deny himself the glance down at her breasts as he tries to escape her gaze. 

“Better?” he asks, tearing his eyes away to look back towards her. 

Lumine hums, reaching forward to tuck a strand of hair behind his ear. “Actually, maybe we can move somewhere a bit more… mm, comfortable?”

She gestures with her head behind him. Wanderer follows her gaze and glances over his shoulder towards the pristine bed. He pictures her puffing the pillows, bending across the mattress to tuck the duvet on either side. It’s bigger than his in the Sanctuary—more than big enough for two. Perfect for them both.

With a heated look, Wanderer slides his hands down to grip under Lumine’s thighs and hefts her up. He relishes in the surprise yelp she lets out as her arms and legs instantly lock onto him. She’s not light—all corded muscle packed into a body built for fight and survival—but Wanderer carries her weight as if it were his own. 

Lumine untangles herself from him as soon as they’re close enough to the bed for Wanderer to lay himself over her. Her back hits the sheets, and he wastes no time in pressing their lips back together, tucking his knee in between her legs. His hands run up her sides, over her arms, before catching her wrists and lightly pinning them down. A light squeeze, a reminder of power given up, and Lumine whines as he licks into her mouth. He relishes in this, her squirming beneath him, how she so willingly gives herself to him. 

Mine. A growl sounds in the back of his throat as he presses deeper into her, his grip tightening. Her resounding moan as she mindlessly grinds against his knee has him up in flames. She’s mine.  

When her pleased mewls turn into whimpers of protest, he relents and pulls just enough away from her for her to catch her breath. A string of saliva connects the two of them, and he licks it away before leaning down to press searing kisses against her throat. This has become familiar ground by now—a brush of teeth, and her breath hitches. A bite, and she keens. When he takes skin between his lips and sucks, she writhes against him, head tilted to the side to give him more access. He greedily drinks in every single sound, wanting more, always wanting more.

Lumine’s voice is rough, high-pitched when she asks, “Do you like it?”

Wanderer pauses, pulling back to meet her eyes. But she’s looking away from him, her chest still heaving at how worked up she’s gotten. He raises an eyebrow. A smirk worms its way up his lips as he leans back down, brushing them against her ear. “I’m supposed to be asking you that.” He punctures his words with a small nibble to the skin on the underside of her jaw.

Lumine shudders beneath him. In the palm of his hands, he can feel the tendons in her wrist strain as she clenches and unclenches her fists. “I-I meant the bed. Is it comfortable?”

Wanderer narrows his eyes, a sliver of annoyance forming within him. Who cares about the damn bed? “It’s serving its purpose,” he murmurs against her. He trails kisses from her jawline down, only to be interrupted by her scarf.

Wanderer scowls down at it. That damn scarf. He slides one of his hands down her arm, trailing his fingers over where it loops around her neck. His fingers hook around, giving a tug. Lumine gasps, her free hand twisting into the sheets. His eyes snap to the motion. Interesting. He thumbs over the smooth material with a thoughtful hum, tucking the information away in the back of his mind for later.

“I want this off,” he states, giving her scarf another pull.

Lumine shivers. “My scarf?”

And everything else. He nods, letting go of her other wrist and sitting up to straddle her waist. She raises her head just high enough for her to reach back, unclipping the fabric and tugging it away. Wanderer snatches it from her; she lets out an indignant “hey!” which he promptly ignores. With narrowed eyes, he studies it, mind wandering as he runs his fingers over the cloth.

“Why are you so interested in my scarf all of a sudden?” Lumine asks, a light laugh on her lips. She’s mostly regained control over her breathing. He glances down to her bare neck, then back to the scarf.

Oh, he’s definitely interested. He sets the scarf aside, coming back down to brush his lips over the now bare skin. Lumine lets out a soft gasp as he immediately picks a spot to latch on and suck, determined to mark her up as much as possible.

“Hey,” she breathes out, a whine leaving her shortly as Wanderer’s tongue drags across the sensitive skin of her collarbones. “Try not to—” Her voice catches as he brushes his lips against them in a chaste kiss. “—l-leave too many marks. Paimon gets worried enough as is—!” she yelps when he bites down, the pain mixing with pleasure as want shoots down and pools deep into her core.

“She can deal with it,” Wanderer growls, soothing the bite mark with his tongue. He kisses up to her ear, cheek pressing against hers, lips brushing against her ear. “Besides, I can tell, you know. You like it when I mark you up as mine. You think I don’t notice?” He can feel Lumine shiver beneath him as he takes a moment to nibble on her ear, if only to hear her whimper. “I want to hear you say it. Tell me,” he breathes against her.

Lumine squeezes her eyes shut, cheeks set aflame. “I-I do like it,” she gasps. “Shinji, I—”

A pleased hum leaves him as he slots his lips back over hers. Her mouth instinctively opens up for him, allowing their tongues to brush together as he eats up whatever it was she wanted to say. The hand still holding her wrist slides up, fingers intertwining in a way that burns him to his very bare bones. Like this, he feels intimacy he never believed he’d feel in his life. One of her legs bends to brush up against his waist, spreading to accommodate him just that little bit more, and he almost loses control of himself on the spot. He wants. He craves. He feels his body tugged towards her as if they were connected by a string—less like a puppet and its master and more like two ends meeting in the kind of knot that doesn’t seem to end. Her fingers tangle in his own and squeeze and he melts against her tongue. 

Wanderer wants to feel her, wants to sink into her, wants to hear her cry out his name, the name she gave him, as he completely ruins her. Borderline obsessed, completely in love, he brings his free hand over to lightly run his fingertips over the marks he’d just left on her collarbones. Lumine shudders beneath him, and he drinks in the high-pitched whine she lets out. He can’t get enough of her, addicted to the feeling of the way her tongue brushes against his, how she gasps when his teeth gently nibble on her bottom lip.

His hand trails down, slowly, making sure she feels the drag of his fingertips as they trace between the valley of her breasts, before catching onto the edge of her dress and giving it a light tug. It won’t come off with just that, but it's enough to make his thoughts known, causing her free hand pushing on his chest for him to relent.

“Wait,” Lumine whispers. Wanderer’s eyebrow twitches in annoyance as he leans away, taking in the sight of her swollen lips and flushed face, hair askew and messy. He can feel himself throb in want, his finger giving up on tugging at her dress as it comes to draw circles over her heart. Her eyes flutter at the sensation, adoration filling her gaze as she leans up to give him a chaste kiss.

“I don’t want to,” Wanderer grumbles, voice thick and heady with lust. It makes her shiver; as their eyes meet, he can see the echo of his desire looking right back at him.

Lumine swallows heavily, pushing him a little more. The two of them sit up, Wanderer straddling her waist. She tries not to move too much as the consequence of their impromptu makeout session makes itself known against her, so close to where he wants it to be, where he knows she wants it to be, if she just—

“I don’t want to rush things,” she tells him. “I want you to be ready. I want you to trust me.”

Wanderer frowns at her, leaning in to brush their noses together. “You think I’m not ready?” he asks.

She squirms beneath him. “W-well—”

His hands splay over her hips, tight grasp threatening to keep her still. She stills, but her breath leaves her in heavy exhales. Her warmth radiates into him. “Okay then,” he says. “Let me spell it out for you.” Her eyes flutter shut as he leans closer to her, but his lips instead brush against the shell of her ear. “I want you. I want to shove my cock so deep inside of you that you’ll forget everything except me. I want to hear you scream my name as you cum again, and again, and again. From my fingers, my tongue, from how I fuck all the thoughts out of your pretty little head. I’d make it so that you wouldn’t even be able to remember your own name. Does that help?”

As Wanderer’s tongue comes to brush across one of the angry red marks he’s left, he can feel, can hear her swallow. The hand on his chest grips at the loose fabric of his top, threatening to slip it down his shoulder. Lumine lets go enough to dip her fingers underneath, tracing the marks along the inside of his shoulders. Wanderer feels like he’s about to go crazy as she drives him utterly insane with her hesitant, featherlight touch. He considers grabbing her wrist and shoving it down to feel just what she does to him, or maybe what he does to her.

But Lumine is nothing if not full of surprises. In one smooth motion, she flips the both of them, so that her legs now straddle his waist. She’s upon him in an instant, mouths melding together as she cups his jaw. Wanderer lets out a surprised grunt in the back of his throat, but everything is quickly thrown out as he meets her desperation with his own. It’s filthy, sinful, the way her hands practically yank down the sleeves of his haori, leaving his shoulders exposed as she grinds against him, tongue pressing against his as he automatically opens to accept her. His gloves are the first thing to go, practically ripped off as she grinds against him. He groans as she licks into his mouth, his hands wandering up her waist, to her sides, around her back to tug at the strings of her corset. 

Lumine parts her lips from his as she slides her hand down his chest, stopping just above the crest of his sternum. "Is this okay?" she asks, leaning forward, hips lifting off of him ever so slightly as her weight shifts forwards. He spares a glance down at how close she's gotten to him, then back up to her, eyes unable to miss the way her cleavage presents on full display.

His tongue runs over his bottom lip, hands itching to feel. "Yeah," he says, voice edged with a rasp.

Lumine rests her forehead against his. “Do you trust me?”

Wanderer’s lips press thin. Honesty, he figures, is the best way to go. “A lot more than I used to.”

“Okay.” Lumine breathes heavily against him, reaching behind her to take one of his wrists in her hand. "Okay. You can… you can touch me," she says, bringing his hand over to rest on her thigh.

"You sure you won't regret that?" he asks. 

Her hand pulls his up higher, until it disappears beneath the folds of her skirt. His fingertips touch the lace of her undershorts and he almost misses the soft bout of laughter that falls from her lips before she mutters, her lips brushing against his, "Please."

Slowly, his fingers crawl up the meat of her thigh, stroking the soft skin before traveling up to the plane of her stomach. She’s toned, muscles flexing in anticipation as he draws circles right above the dip of her hips.

“Shinji,” she whimpers, and it’s like lightning shooting down his spine, a feral grunt ripping through his throat as he winds his free hand in her hair and pulls her down into a searing kiss. It’s pure electricity, the way she immediately opens up to him and presses herself further into his grasp.

One tug at the band of her shorts has her lifting her hips off of his. Wanderer will admit to himself to sneaking glances when they’ve fought together, disappointed with her practicality and his inherent perversion. But now, shuffling the lace down her thighs, swinging one leg to the side, all Wanderer can think is how lucky he is to be the only one allowed to ever see this. Lumine kicks them aside, flung somewhere into the corner to be forgotten. Wanderer drags her back to settle over his hips, hands sliding across the now bare skin of her thighs, her ass. Lumine leans back down, kissing along his neck. She guides his hand lower, over a thatch of hair and towards the heat between her legs. He feels her pulse against his hand as he cups her cunt, fingertips dipping between her folds. Wanderer takes a moment to admire the moan that breaks between them, at the line of her throat. Two fingers dip in without issue, and Wanderer pulls them out, smearing her wetness across her folds. 

“Oh, you must really want this,” Wanderer groans, marveling at how easily his fingers glide over her. “You’re soaked.”

Lumine angles her hips against his hand in an attempt to grind against it, but Wanderer pulls away before she can. “Don’t tease me,” she mumbles, voice thin. 

“What happened to patience?” he asks in a ploy of innocence. 

She scowls down at him. “Shinji.” 

“Lumine,” he mocks, grinning. He strokes his fingers along her outer folds, spreading her wetness around. He leans up, mouth brushing against her ear. “You have me all to yourself. Now tell me how you want me.”

Lumine’s breath stutters as she reaches between them to guide his hand towards the peak of her cunt. She splays it wide and pushes his thumb against her clit, grinding forwards. “Stay here,” she commands, curling his fingers back towards her opening. “And here. Inside.”

Wanderer pushes his fingers back inside of her, curling them as he begins to stroke her clit. Head thrown back, Lumine moans, dropping his wrist to loosely wrap her arms around his neck. She doesn’t even wait for him to start stroking her, immediately moving her hips as she desperately searches for that sweet friction he provides.

“Gonna fuck yourself just like that?” Wanderer asks as he begins to kiss her collarbones. “So desperate you’d rather grind on my hand than wait for me to move?” 

Lumine nods, wordless as she times the little movements of her hips to each thrust of his fingers in and out. Her momentum rocks against him, sending shudders up his spine with every brush against his cock. 

“I can feel your heartbeat through here,” Wanderer says, pushing his fingers in deeper. She chokes on a moan, fingers digging into his back. “Do you even realize how much you’re sucking me in?”

“Can’t—can’t help it,” Lumine stammers as she grinds her clit against his palm. “Feels good, so good, I— ah—”

The grin that works its way onto his face is nothing short of feral. “Of course you can’t. You’re mine. Mine to feel, mine to touch. I’m the only one who gets to see you like this, aren’t I?”

“Just—“ Lumine gasps as the heel of his hand strikes against her cunt, cutting herself off with a moan. “Just for you. I—I’m yours. All yours, Shinji.”

Wanderer watches as she rides his hand, eyes drifting down to her chest. Her tits bounce as she drives herself down with more and more force, so close to spilling over the edge of her dress. He lets her set the pace on his fingers and focuses on circling his thumb over her clit. She’s so wet that there’s hardly any friction when he pushes back her hood to rest his thumb directly over the nub. The next time she drops her hips down against his hand, his thumb drags against it and she spasms, reaching out to clutch at his shoulder. 

“Shh, that’s it,” he mumbles into his chest, yanking her back down against his fingers as he continues to stroke. She continues to buck her hips against him, head thrown back as she grows closer. Wanderer pulls his fingers out from inside her and, while wrapping his other arm around her waist to hold her still, fucks his fingers over her clit, hard and fast. She whines, clenching around nothing, wanting to be filled, craving to be full.

“Fuck,” she curses, reaching behind herself to grab his hand. Wanderer grins so hard it hurts, elation bubbling up from his chest at the sight of her so thoroughly wrecked. She drags his hand up her chest, tugging it past her breast as he stops to squeeze, before letting it rest along the slope of her neck. 

It’s his turn to curse as muscle memory takes over, fingers splaying over her throat as his other hand continues to work her cunt. “I knew it. So this is how you like it,” he says, barely squeezing. “Did you dream about this? Me fucking you with my hand on your throat? Squeezing the air from your lungs, have you gasping for breath, completely at my will?”

Lumine nods, panting as she struggles to keep up her own pace. Wanderer feels the mechanical tendons in his forearm flexing to keep her upright but he’d rather die before stopping. “Y-yes, please, ha— harder.” Her voice is a pathetic whine, and he can feel the vibration of her words from underneath his hand. It makes him dizzy, goes straight to his head and shoots down to the molten need that’s slowly filling his every thought.

“Like this?” he asks, pressing on either side of her neck. It’s barely a fraction of his strength and they both know it, but the pressure over her pulse leaves Lumine choking on her own pleasure more than anything. Lumine bends like a bow over top of him, straining against his hold. Her eyes roll back and her hips jerk and Wanderer watches as her orgasm ripples through her entire body. 

Lumine slowly sinks against him, restoring the entirety of her body weight on him as she presses her face into his shoulder. The wet heat of her breath fans out over his exposed skin. Puffs of air tickle him as she begins to catch his breath. He moves his hand from between her legs to settle on her hip, the other reaching around to rest on her back as her pants turn into soft kisses, the chaste kind he’s reveled in whenever they’ve had a moment to spare. His cock, trapped between them, twitches in interest from even that. 

He’s about to roll her over and fetch a cloth when Lumine works her hands underneath his haori to untuck it from his pants. Teeth scrape across the fabric over his collarbones and any suspicion that Wanderer had that they were finished leaves him. Before he can change their positions, Lumine sits back on her haunches and reaches behind herself, tugging at the strings of her corset with much more agility than Wanderer ever could have managed. The ribbon falls loose behind her, and with a tug at the halter secured behind her neck, her dress comes loose. Absolved of the pressure keeping her chest in place, her tits spill out from the cups. She’s quick to rise up onto her knees and prevent Wanderer from touching, shuffling back on the bed to sit a leg’s distance from him. One foot, still clad in her thigh-high boots, presses to the inside of his thigh as she spreads her legs.

“Stay there,” she murmurs, cheeks ablaze, and who is he to deny a show?

Lumine starts at the bend of her knee and eases the straps of her boots loose. As she leans forwards and bends her knee, her skirts fall back to expose the thatch of blonde nestled between her legs. Her chest squishes up against her thigh as she slides the first boot down her leg and kicks it to the side. When it comes back to settle, her skirt has fully flipped up, giving Wanderer a perfect view of her pussy, still wet enough with her own mess to dampen the sheets. The second boot comes off much like the first, and with both legs bare Lumine closes them shut and shuffles back to her knees. Grabbing either side of the dress, she finally begins to tug her dress over her head, giving Wanderer a perfect view of her body stretched in motion, muscles shifting as the garment joins the rest. 

There are scars littered across her torso, a burn on her thigh, the odd bruise on her arm usually covered by the armguards she tugs off by the teeth. Lumine wears the proof of her lifetime on her body, made all the more beautiful for it. Wanderer doesn’t realize he’s begun to twist the sheets between his hands until she leans forward, bare as the Snezhnayan winter, and takes his hand into her own. No sooner does he entwine their fingers together is she in his lap once more, kissing him with a devotion that rivals the most devout of shrine maidens. It’s tongue and teeth and filthy in a way Wanderer craves, in a way he reciprocates by feeling up the planes of her bare back. Lumine manages to yank his haori fully off and sends it flying off of the bed, and in her moment of distraction, Wanderer manages to flip their positions. 

The fire between them rages, and he’s so hard it hurts. He devours her as he looms over her, the never-ending passion burning within him, in between them. He grinds his clothed cock against her bare cunt, and the moan she lets out vibrates on his tongue. With one arm placed next to her head to keep himself steady, hips slowly rolling against her, his other hand crawls up her sides, trailing ticklish touches that have her arching and writhing up against him. That same hand cups her breast, tweaking and pinching her nipple until it stiffens under his touch. He pops off of her mouth at the same time as he flicks the hardened bud, and she bites her lip to hide her whine.

That won’t do.

He trails his fingers up, over her collarbone. As he passes by, he applies the slightest bit of pressure to her throat, if only to take in the way her eyelids flutter. He grips onto her chin, thumbing her bottom lip out from under her teeth. Her mouth parts instantly, and with an incessant curiosity, he places the pad of his thumb into her tongue. She attempts to close her mouth around him, to suck him in, but he doesn’t let her, tugging her mouth open. She complies, letting the tension in her jaw go as her chest heaves.

“Don’t hide from me,” he commands, a rumble from deep within his chest. “I want to hear every noise you make. I want to hear you as you cum on my tongue and all over my dick as I fuck into you so deep you’ll have no choice but to be moulded to fit only me, addicted to my cock like the slut you are. Isn’t that right?”

Lumine’s breathing stops for a moment, just for a moment, and in a split second flurry of panic he wonders if he went a little too far. That worry is thrown out the door when her legs open wider for him, one hooking around his thigh as her hips stutter up against his. “Please,” she begs, muffled by the thumb that continues to rest on her tongue. “Shinji, please—”

Wanderer’s faux breath shudders out of him. “Please what? You’re going to have to be more specific, Lumine.”

Her hand trembles as it reaches down to grasp the hem of his shorts. “I want you—I want to see you, all of you, please—”

Wanderer clicks his tongue. “So impatient,” he chides, leaning down to lavish kisses across her breasts. His thumb leaves her mouth, instead coming back down to continue teasing her nipple. If he listens closely, he thinks he can hear the pounding of her heart against her chest.

A frustrated groan greets his ears as she arches up against him. “I-I’ve been patient enough,” she whines. “Please, please, I want you, give me all of you. Make me yours, please, Shinji—”

He almost gives in right then and there. It’d be so easy to tear off the rest of his clothes and sink into her hot, velvety heat. But no—no, he has other plans for her first.

Wanderer trails his kisses further down her sternum, down her stomach. He brings his hands to rest on either thigh and pushes them apart to make room for himself as he ventures lower. Pausing at her hip bones, Wanderer glances up to meet Lumine’s eyes, to feel the simmering heat of her gaze. He digs his teeth into the thin skin and revels in the gasp it earns him, all the while massaging the inside of her thigh. It doesn’t take much for Lumine’s legs to spread open before him.

Wanderer leaves the bruise on her hip and turns his attention to her cunt. He mimics the act of breathing just to hear her choked moans at each puff of air against her skin, sensitive from prior orgasm and rushing with building desire. Hands slip under her thighs to tug her closer by the ass, angling her hips up towards him. He lets himself knead the soft flesh that hides layers of honed muscles and grins as Lumine catches on to his gambit. She works a hand into his hair, massaging at his scalp as he presses the softest of kisses to the top of her mound. Without looking away, he sticks out his tongue and licks across her clit. Lumine’s head falls back with the pillows and he can’t help the chuckle she no doubt feels. 

Holding her tight so as not to shift away, Wanderer dips his tongue into her cunt, smearing her slick and his spit across her folds. She tastes bitter, but it's a flavor he’s accustomed to and it's Lumine— she could be bleeding for all he cared, and she would still taste heavenly on his tongue. He nuzzles his face closer, nose resting upon her mound, and teases her with the flat press of his tongue. Opening his jaw wider, he thrusts his tongue into her cunt. She’s hotter than he ever realized, warm in the same way a Sumeru City night is humid. By the time he begins to lap at her clit, her cunt throbs with barely contained need. He kisses it like he’d kiss her, slow and drawn out and messy. He sucks on her and lets his own eyes flutter shut when nails rake along his scalp.

Breathing—a horribly human trait he once envied—of course, is unnecessary here. He wonders how long he could stay here, between her legs, tongue buried in her cunt. Until she cried? Until she passed out? Would she push him away or hold him closer, riding his face like she rode his hand? He tucks that fantasy in the back of his mind for another day, for now content with the way her hips buck against his mouth in search for more. His hands splay across her hips, squeezing hard enough he’s sure to leave imprints of his fingers on her skin, pinning her down to the bed to continue his sweet torture.

“Shinji,” Lumine sobs. The cry of his name makes him throb.

“Gods, you’re so—” Wanderer groans against her heat. Still using one hand to pin her down, he moves the other to replace his tongue with two fingers. She’s so wet with both her slick and his spit that they slide in without an issue. When he sucks on her clit, his fingers pistoning in and out of her, she full on keens.

He can tell that she’s close by the way she arches her back, her whines building in volume and pitch, her cunt squeezing and pulsing on his fingers. As soon as she reaches that precipice, so close, he pulls away, leaving her gasping and straining, fisting the sheets as she cries.

“Why—”

Wanderer cuts her off with his lips, the double taste of her intermingling. A strangled moan sounds in the back of her throat as she immediately latches onto him, hands scrabbling onto his back and scratching down. Lumine feels the ridges of his spine, the dip of his shoulder blades. But he doesn’t let up, fingers entering once more as his thumb circles her clit in smooth, tight circles. She gasps for breath against his mouth, and he allows her a break from his kisses to breathe. He feels her clench around his fingers, stroking her with languid thrusts that leaves her dangling on the edge.

“Shinji,” Lumine heaves, her lips brushing against his. “Shinji, I—I’m so close, I need, I need to cum, please, please let me? I—”

“No,” Wanderer growls, lightly bumping his nose against hers. “Not yet.”

“That’s not—” she protests, fingers twisting up the top covering his back. “—not fair, that’s not f-fair, Shinji…”

“You can take it.” His lips press back against hers, and she melts into the sheets, a puddle of arousal and pleasure as he continues his sluggish pace. Lost in the sensations, it’s all she can do to suck on his tongue, pull him ever closer into her. Every cry and plead for more is swallowed, tucked away, ignored.

When he’s decided she’s enough away from the edge, his fingers suddenly speed up, scissoring and curling up against that spot inside of her so intensely that she very nearly screams. And maybe he does still feel a little scorned, a little sadistic as her hips jolt with the overstimulation of being so close, yet so far away. He licks a stray tear from her eye, salt on his tongue, the taste of sweat mixing with the taste of her tears. 

He keeps her there as he trails kisses back down, marking a bruise onto the dip of her thighs. She huffs, throwing an arm around her eyes as she arches her back, a wail leaving her as he gives her clit a few teasing licks of his tongue. She sobs his name, begs him for more, to stop teasing her, to let her let go. He doesn’t, too focused on sucking on her clit, rubbing the pads of his fingers against her g-spot with every thrust, addicted to the taste of her and the sound of her crying for him. Her hands come down to tangle in his hair, pressing him closer, every single one of her nerves alight with tension as she builds back up. 

Even as he finally lets her cum, he doesn’t stop, fingers still pistoning out of her as he laps up her mess. Her hands tug on his hair, trying in vain to yank him away as sweet pleasure turns into overstimulated pain. “I can’t—Shinji, please, I can’t, it’s—it’s too much, Shinji—”

He hums against her, and the vibration makes her entire body shudder, a choked sob escaping her as he leaves one last kiss at the top of her throbbing cunt.

Gods, he loves her.

“Shinji,” Lumine breathes, voice rough with use. “Shinji, Shinji.” She calls his name again and again, begs for him so prettily that he finally lets up, dragging his fingers out of her. Her breath hitches as she watches him lick his fingers clean, thighs stopped from rubbing together by his legs keeping them open.

As soon as Wanderer leans back, she’s on the attack, practically tearing at his clothes to get them off. He laughs at her impatience as she tugs at the braided tie holding up his shorts. He lifts up his hips, allowing her to fully remove them, tossing them to some corner of the room. His body suit is hastily removed next, exposing his dick to the chilled air of the room. He kicks his socks off while he’s at it, leaving him completely bare. her hands are finally able to appreciate his bare skin. Lumine drinks in the sight of him, his flat chest, his marked stomach, his collarbones on display. He recognizes the look in her eyes from the dogs in Gandhara Ville when they see a fresh piece of meat. She runs her hands over the smooth plane of his chest. The heat between them simmers as she takes a moment to appreciate. 

“You don’t have nipples,” she comments, thumbing over where the nubs would usually be.

“Why would I? I’m not human. There’s no use for them,” Wanderer tells her, shivering under his touch. “Is it so strange?”

Lumine leans in to mouth at his collarbones. “Not strange. Just different,” she says, lips brushing against his skin. Her hands travel down, feeling over the design on his stomach. “What about these?”

Wanderer tenses in anticipation. “What about them?”

Lumine tilts her head down to get a better view of her palm dragging down across the marks. “Do they have a use?”

Wanderer’s lips pull thin, jaw clenching. “I think you’ll find the useful part a little further down.”

Lumine presses a chaste kiss to his lips. “What happened to patience?” she echoes.

Wanderer’s eyebrow twitches, mirth flooding through him. “So that’s how you want to play?” he hums.

“I don’t want to play,” Lumine whispers against him, hand dipping further down. He lets out a soft gasp as she wraps her hand around him, giving his dick dainty strokes that aren’t enough. He twitches in her palm, sensitive to the touch. “I want to feel you.”

Wanderer presses his cheek against hers, warmth seeping into each other. “Get on with it then,” he growls into her ear. “You were so impatient before, practically begging for me to fuck you like a common whore.” She falters, a shaky exhale leaving her, and he takes that as a sign to continue. “Is that what you want? Do you want me to shove my cock so deep inside of you that you’ll be ruined for anyone else? Have you belonging to me and only me?”

Lumine’s breath stutters, and she begins jerking him off in short, stunted motions, grip a little firmer, a little faster. Wanderer’s hips buck up to meet her, a soft grunt breaking out of him. Her hand is calloused, yet soft all the same, feeling like heaven on his sinful soul. It’s not enough. He wants to push her down, thrust inside her, make her cum from his dick alone and take her again and again, a soaked mess on his— their bed. He wants to see her ruined, mind blank from pleasure, voice hoarse from screaming his name. He wants—he wants—

Lumine leans in, brushing her lips against his cheek. “You talk such a big talk, but you’re just as desperate as me,” she whispers. Her free hand finds her way to his elbows, admiring the smooth skin.

“So now you want to be a brat, hm?” he breathes. “You want me to put you in your place? Get punished like the desperate slut you are?” She moans at his words; he continues. “That’s right. You’ve already cum twice, and yet it’s not enough for you, is it? Nothing would satisfy a whore like you.” He leans forward to lick the shell of her ear, and she shudders. “How many times would it take until you’re satisfied? Five? Ten? Fifteen?” One arm wraps around her to dig his fingers into the flesh of her hips, the other one coming up to palm at her breast. “You want me to ruin you. To break you. Isn’t that right? I’ll do it. If that’s what you want. I’d collar you, tie you up, leave you on the edge for hours until you’re begging for my dick to fill you up, like the cock hungry whore you are.”

“Sh-Shinji…” Lumine whimpers. Her hand on him speeds up, leaving him breathless. It’s been so long since someone had touched him like this, and the fact that it’s Lumine only further accentuates the pleasure bursting in the back of his mind like fireworks. “P-please, can you…?”

“Can I what?” Wanderer grunts. He takes her nipple between his fingers, pinches and pulls. A soft yelp leaves her, but she doesn’t pull away, still trembling in his grasp. “I told you before, you’ll have to be more— ngh —specific. Did you already forget? Too desperate for me to fuck you that you can’t retain a single thought? Is that it?”

“Yes, please,” Lumine begs, oh so prettily. Just for him. Only for him. “Please, Shinji, I need you, I need you so— ah!”

He cuts her off as he promptly swats her hand away from him and shoves her down onto the bed by the shoulders, taking her wrists in one hand and pinning them above her head. He looms over her, taking in the sight of her flushed skin, her blonde hair a beautiful, tangled mess. Even like this, she looks heavenly, delicious, ripe for the taking. He sees nothing but her, the way her lips quiver, her eyes filled with lust and adoration. It makes his chest tighten in a bittersweet pain that he craves to fill with her and only her.

A laugh leaves him. “You really are a masochist. It doesn’t matter if you’re degraded, choked, bitten; you love it all. I really should collar you, shouldn’t I?” He runs the tips of his fingers over her neck. “My name, right here, carved into leather that would dig into your skin, cut you off from begging for my cock, unable to breathe. You could even wear it around for everyone to know just exactly who you belong to. Is that what you want, precious?” His hips punctuate the pet name as they roughly rock up against hers, a taste of pleasure that leaves her aching for more. She keens, back arching as she cries some semblance of yesyesyesyes.

Her scarf lays in the peripheral of his vision, that idea forming in his mind once more. An image of him tying it around her throat, pulling when she misbehaves, cheeks flush with arousal and lack of air. He considers, for a moment, glancing back and forth between it and her flushed face, hair a tangled mess against the sheets. With a feral grin, he reaches over to grab it, letting go of her wrists.

Lumine pants beneath him, confusion filling her features. “What are you…” She follows the movement of his hand with her eyes, swallowing heavily when she sees him holding the scarf in his hand. Her eyes light up.

“Let’s practice,” he purrs, thumbing over the smooth fabric. By the way she tightens around him, he can tell she’s not opposed to the idea. Her eyes meet his, and her excitement is palpable. Nimble hands wrap her scarf back around her neck, tying it loose enough that a firm tug would be enough pressure. “If it’s too much, tap here twice,” he tells her, tapping his finger over her heart. “Understand?”

She nods, her heart rate skyrocketing as all of her fantasies materialize into reality in the span of less than a minute. He gives a slight tug to test, and the scarf tightens around her, but not nearly enough to cut off oxygen. It’s enough pressure that leads her begging for more with her eyes alone, hands smoothing over the sheets before twisting them up.

“Now, where were we?” he grunts, free hand fondling her breast as he continues to grind his cock against her core.. She gasps, head tilting to the side. The fabric of her scarf brushes against her neck, and the sensation of that alone leaves her dizzy. She moans as the tip of his dick catches against her clit, providing the sweetest of friction that’s nowhere near enough. “You still haven’t been specific enough, Lumine. I won’t know what you want unless you tell me.”

“Gods,” she hisses, fists clenching in his grasp. He can feel the tendons in her wrists tense. He grins, wide, feral. A small tug on the scarf has her breath catching. “P-please Shinji, please fuck me, I want—I want…”

He nudges the tip against her, but refuses to thrust in. “You want what?”

“I want your cock to fill me up,” she croaks. “I want to be yours, o-only yours. I want to feel you inside of me. I want you to r-ruin me, Shinji, plea—!”

A strangled cry leaves her as he thrusts into her all at once. Her back arches, and he barely leaves any time for thoughts as he sets a punishing pace. Everything, all of what he’s ever wanted, peaks in this moment, in feeling her cunts overwhelming warmth wrapped around his cock as she gets lost in the pleasure he gives her.

“You’re so fucking tight.” Wanderer groans as she squeezes around him. Another tug of the scarf, and she tightens up again. “Fuck, how are you so perfect?” It’s like she was made for him, fitting him like a glove. 

“I-it’s—” Lumine gasps as he leans down to lavish attention over her breasts, kissing down from her collarbones before taking a nipple into his mouth and sucking. “It’s been a- ah!— wh-while.”

He growls against her skin, a burst of irrational jealousy flitting through him. “And I’ll make sure it’ll never be that way again.” He punctures his words with a bite to her shoulder, another possessive mark that he soothes his tongue over. “I’ll fuck you every night if you want. Make it so that you won’t be able to live without my cock, even for a day.”

“Mm! Sh-Shinji, I— ah!” she keens as he shifts the angle he ruts inside of her from, pounding into her g-spot with every thrust. “God!”

Wanderer kisses the worship off her lips. He licks into her mouth, tasting every crevice, devouring every whine and moan and sound that she makes. He’s burning, she’s burning, sweat-slicked skin arching up against him as he relentlessly fucks into her. “If that's what you want to call me,” he laughs, voice gruff against her lips, “then by all means, go ahead.”

“You’re so—!” Lumine yelps as he bites down another mark on her shoulder, opposite of the other one, mirrored. “F-fuck, Shinji,” she whines, tilting her head to the side.

He slows his pace, grinding into her as deep as he can go, the tip of his dick kissing her cervix. She gasps, breathless, eyes squeezed shut, hands twisting into the sheets by her head. He pants, exhaling heavily as he trails kisses back down to her breasts. He fondles the other one, plucking and pinching at her sensitive nub as his tongue dips over the other. He considers a moment, before brushing his teeth over her nipple, giving it the softest of nibbles. The effect is immediate, a loud cry leaving her, her legs hooking around his hips.

“Look at you,” Wanderer practically coos, showering her with kisses that have her trembling like an autumn leaf in the wind. “I can feel you. Every time I give this a little tug—” He jerks on the scarf; she wheezes. “—you squeeze around me so tight. You’re so desperate for this. So wet for me. Such a mess. Don’t you think that’s a little pathetic?”

Lumine tips her head to the side, eyes shut as she’s hit with wave after wave of never-ending pleasure. “Shinji—”

“That’s right,” he growls, brushing his teeth against the underside of her jaw. “Say my name. Don’t you dare say anything else. Don’t think about anything else. Only me.”

“Yes—” She arches up against him as a particularly hard thrust leaves her sight blinded with stars. “Yes, Shinji, o-only you! I—” Her voice is cut off by another tug of the scarf, the threatening pleasure driving her mad. It’s so much. It’s not enough. With every thrust, Lumine swears she loses a bit more of her mind, dizzy from every drag of his dick inside of her, every brush against that sensitive spot inside of her, every pull of the scarf, every snap of his hips. 

“How badly do you even—o-oh, shit—” Wanderer groans, deep and guttural as she squeezes around him. A growl rips out of him as he goes back to caressing her tit, thumbing over her nipple. Wanderer can’t get enough of them, feeling them, watching them bounce as he impales her on his cock over and over again. Her hands scrabble over his back, digging her nails in and dragging. The pain makes him hiss, only serving to hasten his thrusts. “Do you even know what you do to me? How long I craved seeing you like this? Fucked out and begging for me?”

“M-me too,” Lumine cries, tears pricking the edges of her eyes. The sight of them eggs him on, movements rougher, faster, deeper. “I wanted you for so—so long, Shinji, I want you, I want you, I-I love you so much—!”

Wanderer chokes, hips stuttering for just a moment before he doubles down, laying himself on top of her so that skin meets skin, desperately rutting into her. One arm slides around her back, holding her up closer to him, and the hand holding the scarf lets go to cradle her head. He embraces her, desperation bleeding through as he groans into her ear.

“You’re so good.” He licks the shell of her ear, and her arms sling around his shoulders to pull him closer. “So good. Such a good girl for me, Lumine. Taking me so nicely, I—” He grunts, a near whine leaving his throat.

“Yes, yes, yes,” she wheezes. “I want to be—be good for you, I’m yours, I’m all yours, Shinji—”

“Mine. You’re mine. Mine to fuck, mine to hold, mine to—to—” A garbled gasp leaves him as he feels the pressure in his abdomen building, steadily climbing to the top.

Lumine must have taken notice. She clings even tighter onto him, as if he’d disappear at any moment. “Inside me!” she keens. “Cum inside me, please, Shinji, please!”

Wanderer squeezes his eyes shut, panting. “You want me to fill you up?” 

“Yes!” she sobs. “I want it, I want to feel it, I want everything you have—”

“It’s yours,” he groans. He fucks into her impossibly deeper, the rhythm of his hips pounding into hers becoming uneven as he chases his high. “It’s all yours, so take it, take every last drop—oh fuck—” His breath hitches, a wave of affection overcoming him as he holds her ever closer.

Those unique clothes are quite beautiful.

He chokes at the memory. “Lumine—”

Don’t you dare mock Teppei… He’s not incompetent!

Malicious smoke fills his lungs. “Lumine—”

Even if it means losing yourself, would you still want to become a god?

The smell of ozone, lightning at his fingertips. It trails up his back, burns the marks left behind by her nails, the one on the back of his neck. “Lumine—”

Wait. Why would you ask that…?

The static tingling at his skin, nothing but cyan for miles. Cyan, white, blonde. Blonde. “Lumine—”

It’s complicated, but I do know you.

We were each other’s enemies.

Huh? You want us to decide?

Lost, lost, lost. So lost, now found. “Lumine, Lumine, gods, Lumine—”

“Shinji!” Lumine cries out beneath him. The call of his name, high pitched, rough, so filled with affection and pleasure as she flutters around him, her own orgasm washing over her, and he can’t hold back anymore. In a few more short thrusts, he slams all the way inside her, a strangled keen leaving him as he cums inside her, fills her, just how she wanted, just how he wanted. Tears prick at the edges of his eyes. She wants him. She wants him.

The searing heat of Wanderer’s tears meets her skin not moments later, leaving cool trails as they fall from his cheeks. It takes her a few moments to collect herself, to come back down from her high. When she does, she recognizes the shaking of his shoulders, even as he hides his face from her, refusing to look at her.

“Shinji…?” she whispers, cupping his cheek. She nudges his chin, but he doesn’t budge. “Shinji? Are you okay? Was that too much?”

“I love you,” he croaks, burying his face into the crook of her neck. “I love you so much. I love you.” His voice is muffled against her skin, wet from her sweat and his tears.

With a soft, gentle sigh, she runs her hands over his hair, threading through her fingers and combing out the mess. “I’ve got you,” she says. “I’ve got you, Shinji. I love you, too. So much. I have you.”

And she won’t let him go.

—

So things aren’t easy, but they never are. Nothing is all of a sudden all fixed up, there are still wounds that fester, anxieties that keep progress at bay. And yet, there’s a change. It comes in the way that they spend time in her teapot, carving out time for each other. He brings Nekomata along, and the three of them cuddle on the bed.

“I’m not that scared anymore,” he admits one night in their bed, the both of them wrapped up in blankets, wrapped in each other.

She pulls him closer, presses his face to the crook of her neck as she kisses the top of his head. “Me too,” she whispers back to him, holding him close.

When they miss each other, they write little notes in the notebook. His is never more than two sentences, maybe a little doodle, of them, of Nekomata, of himself. She writes him a lengthy note about her day, the dramatics in Fontaine, her adventure as it continues.

When he arrives while she’s there, waiting for him, she turns to him with the brightest smile. 

“Welcome home, Shinji!” Lumine calls to him.

Shinji tips his hat down, unable to hide his smile, and the warmth of his heart blooms.

“I’m home.”