Chapter Text
"I think Hank can fix the timeline." Bruce said as Audrey and Tony walked into the Banner's personal lab. He and Hank were hunkered over a tabletop projection that swirled with various observational charts and running algorithms.
"Oh reeeeeeally?" Tony asked, as his eyebrow shot up.
"You're not going to immediately shoot this down, Stark?" Hank asked.
"I'm not Richards. I can be reasoned with. Convince me, and then the three of us can convince his stubborn ass." Tony said. Audrey was less than subtle as she checked the time on her phone.
"Keep it to words those of us who don't have advanced degrees can understand. That should keep us on time for dinner upstairs." She said. Tony turned and gave her the stink eye. "Don't even try, Calvin. You were all 'Cap'n's orders' before. Turnips, remember. There are turnips to be had. Possibly a potato thing too." She said and glared right back at him.
"You're lucky it's the spies cooking and I have a legitimate fear of an arrow up the ass if I don't comply. Okay, Hank, give me the elevator pitch." Tony said.
"She calls you Calvin?" Hank asked.
"I call her Hobbes. She vetoed Nala." Tony said. "Clock's ticking, Hank... And I am not insulting her, just ask her." Audrey rolled her eyes and looked at Tony fondly.
"I swear I am okay with it. Hobbes is the shit." Audrey agreed. "Now go science, and when I call time out, you get your butts in the elevator or I send the spy and the sharpshooter down here."
"Okay, comprehensive metaphor." Hank murmured. "Essentially instead of time being a series of parallel lines, we want to make a more spider-web effect, ending at the same point."
"Explain to me how that isn't extremely dangerous." Tony said.
"If we arrange and stitch enough similar time streams in the correct way, hopefully they would all end the same point, like the centre of a spider-web." Hank said.
"And just hope that the end point, which I assume is the inevitable heat death of the universe, which should really be defined as the Big Crunch instead, or like, Norse Wargs starting to eat celestial bodies, is a happy one?"
"If we're careful, we can probably arrange an end point that most people can live with. I am focusing our efforts on specific tears in our own timeline, and merging those back together. Other universes that have significant differences to our own will be left to their own devices." Hank said. Tony let his head tip back and forth from shoulder to shoulder a few times.
"I think the idea has merit... Which of course means that Reed is going to fucking hate it. Oh, and we leave out the Earth where I'm a woman and married to Steve... Not that I object to being a woman, because my legs look amazing in heels, or being married to Steve, because he's my boo... But I can only imagine what the SHRA fiasco would have looked like there." Tony said and shuddered.
"I think seeing you rock a pair of Jimmy Choo stilettos is something I need in my life, Calvin." Audrey said dryly.
"Not until someone puts a ring on it, Hobbes. I have standards." Tony replied.
"Pardon me, sir, but Agents Barton and Romanov have requested everyone's presence in the common dining room." JARVIS said politely.
"Thanks, J." Tony said.
"Okay, well now I'm interested. Dinner will keep. So, if you're stitching timelines together, does that mean you will need to actually travel through to different times and parallel universes?" Audrey asked.
"It's possible that hands on correction will be required." Hank mused. "Such as going back to punch myself in the kidney for thinking that bringing the past X-men here was a sane, reasonable, option... And to give myself the solution to stabilize my mutation."
"Soooo, can I come?" Audrey asked, eyes wide and curious.
"No!" Came the collective response from Hank and Bruce. Tony, on the other hand, shrugged.
"I don't see why not." He said casually.
"Stark, I've been acting crazy lately, and THAT is crazy." Hank said.
"Aw, com'on. I'll be quiet and I won't eat very much... But I make no promises about not shooting Hitler if I encounter him." Audrey countered.
"What's this about shooting Hitler?" Steve asked as the lab doors opened for him.
"Audrey wants to go if we have to dimension hop or time travel in order to fix the timeline. She's offered up her considerable marksmanship skills in order to unalive Hitler should we run into him." Tony said.
"Okay, maybe it does sound nuts, but only when you phrase it like Wade Wilson would." Audrey said. Steve cocked his head and a shit-disturber grin settled on his face.
"No, no. I get the logic of that. Everyone wants to shoot Hitler. Everyone... Even Hitler wanted to shoot Hitler there at the end." Steve reasoned. There was a full second of stunned silence before Tony and Audrey collapsed on one another in helpless laughter, which came out as tiny, high-pitched gasps while they fought for breath. Hank and Bruce's stunned reactions remained.
"What? Too soon? It's been seventy damn years. Lighten up, people." Steve said with a brusque air. That sent Tony and Audrey back into fresh gasping for breath.
"See? What did I tell you? This is why Steve is my boo." Tony managed to get out.
Steve rolled his eyes, and then grabbed each of their wrists and started pulling them toward the door and the elevator. "March, boys." He said to Hank and Bruce. "I will not tolerate grumpy, ill-fed Beasts and Hulks, especially when we've suddenly got a full house again."
"You're awful, Rogers." Hank said, but he came down off the reinforced lab stool he'd been occupying. Bruce set about closing down the lab for the evening.
"I'll concede to wise-ass, but I'm not so bad. Buck though, now Bucky was a real son of a bitch. Still is when you get him on the right day. Horrible mouth he never should have kissed his mother with." Steve said. Tony and Audrey continued to laugh like hyenas all the way to the elevator, leaning on one another for support through their guffaws.
"I swear, the only time jokes about getting shot in the face are even remotely funny are when Hitler or Dick Cheney are involved, and only because that guy survived." Bruce said.
Dinner was organized chaos. Audrey's closest comparisons were the large social gatherings for weddings or during harvest season. There were jokes and teasing, and dinner rolls were being thrown around. Clint was making a long-winded, but enthusiastic rant about how Cap's new battle cry should include the word "Rutabega!" in foreign countries, in order to screw with the non-English speaking populations of the world. At the centre of it all was Steve Rogers, grinning like an idiot at the chowline atmosphere of it all.
Tony settled Audrey between himself and Hank, and waved Pepper over to his other side. Audrey thought she liked how no one sat at the ends of the long, custom made table, instead they used the space for platters of food after use. There were half a dozen new faces around the table, along with Natasha, Clint, and Phil. They were introduced as Jessica, Peter, Carol, Kate, Rogue, and she noticed that Logan was back as well. She scented the air carefully, and thankfully her fear response didn't go into overdrive this time. Knowing that he was an Oilers fan had humanized him for her.
Steve was across from them, strategically sitting beside Barton, whose need for mischief knew no bounds it seemed. He was the main culprit in dinner rolls being used as artillery, despite Steve preventing most attempts. "I know that this can get a little overwhelming to the senses. Are you alright, my dear?" Hank asked quietly. Audrey tilted her head, leaned to the side, and patted Mac, who was waiting patiently near her chair.
"Yeah, I think so." She murmured back.
"Heads up, fuzzy!" Barton cried playfully, and Hank nonchalantly caught the dinner roll that had been tossed at his face.
"I spent my youth at the same table as a telekinetic and a guy who could summon snow balls at will. You'll have to do much better than that, Clint." Hank said mildly and set the roll down on his plate.
Audrey noticed Tony leaning forward on the table beside her, with the same idiot grin on his face as Steve. There was an all is right with the world feeling at the table. "I think we did it, Steve." Tony said to him fondly. "We fixed it."
"Yeah, I think we did." Steve replied.
"Aww. Guys! I think mom and dad are officially back together!" Peter cried from somewhere on Pepper's other side. Audrey swallowed a snort of laughter, but Tony didn't bother trying to hide it.
"That's right, kids. So don't make mommy get out his mighty shield to get you to eat your vegetables and mind your manners at the table." Tony said. Steve closed his eyes and shook his head.
"I'm still the mom, aren't I?" Steve asked with a tired acceptance.
"Steve, sweetheart, if I wasn't the main breadwinner around here, and like, had any awareness of how to relate to other humans, I would totally switch off in an equally nurturing role. But that being said, you've met me." Tony said. Steve brought his palm to his forehead with an audible thump. "Don't worry though boo, as long as the kids are looked after, and I can keep their college funds up, your career shouldn't get in the way of parental duties, and if so, we can get nannies to help-"
"Tony, quit it." Pepper said and swatted Tony's arm. Barton slowly edged his hand over to the basket, and was about to launch a dinner roll. But before he could take aim, Tony's arm went under the table and came up encased in the armor's gauntlet, with the repulsor humming to life.
"Barton, what did daddy just say about minding your manners?" Tony warned. Audrey's jaw dropped and she stared at Tony. Clint dropped the roll.
"The hell did that come from?!" Audrey asked.
"Proper preparation prevents poor performance. Especially during family dinner." Tony said with a shrug, but kept his eyes on Clint.
"Oh come on, Stark! If I can't have a bow at the table, there's no way that's allowed." Clint said.
"Difference is, it's technically my table." Tony said.
"Honey, you're setting a bad example in front of the children." Steve said, in a spot on June Cleaver impression. It was Tony's turn to groan and roll his eyes. "Gauntlet off, and pass the potatoes, Tony." Steve said. Tony whined, flicked his wrist, and the gauntlet started to come apart and hover away. On its way back to the armory, the glove paused over Clint's head and massaged his scalp briefly, mussing up his hair.
"Dammit, Stark! That is so creepy." Clint complained, as he swatted at the glove.
"You like it when Dummy does it." Tony said, passing the potatoes over to Steve.
"Dummy's different. That glove is like Thing from the Addams Family." Clint said.
"Then just be glad it likes you." Tony said and grinned at Clint. "And that it only went after your hair."
Steve grinned wide at Tony, who replied in kind but had to question him on it. "What are you so happy about?"
"It's just been awhile since you flirted with me like that. So help me, I think I missed it a little." Steve said.
"You are the best boo a fella could ever hope for." Tony said and his grin turned lecherous.
"Didn't miss it that much, Tony." Steve said and rolled his eyes. Tony reached across the table and grabbed Steve's hand for a moment.
"Hush boo, just let the magic happen." Tony said, his voice the consistency of melted caramel.
"Pass the gravy." Steve said.
Tony and Hank both noticed Audrey getting progressively quieter during the meal. She maintained a pleasant expression, but increasingly unfocused. "There's quite a few people at this table." Hank said between a boisterous exchange between Peter and Clint. His voice was low and steady, and Audrey's leonine ear spun to focus on his direction. "A lot of voices and a lot of scents." He continued. "Unlike Logan, I've had to consciously become used to it. Because as soon as you start unraveling someone's scent, it can become utterly overwhelming for any being with higher cognitive function. We can ponder on why someone's scent is the way it is... Combine that with a table full of plenty of food, and rowdy diners, and it can be confusing."
"Nailed it one, Hank." Audrey said softly.
"Pick a focus point. Yourself or Tony will be a good place to start. You'll have sublimated most of those scents by now."
"Yeah, okay." Audrey replied.
"The fur itself has a scent, you've probably noticed. Not unpleasant and certainly less musky than other mammals... Then there are clothes, the scent of the laundry soap. The tower's laundry service uses a very mildly scented one, which I appreciate. It's got lavender and chamomile in it. You can use that scent to identify who lives in the tower for the most part... Scents associated with relaxation are a good thing to focus on when there are large groups of people around you in an enclosed setting. Out in the world, most scents will just ebb and flow, but extended proximity to so many can be painful in how overwhelming it is. Picking a point to focus on helps. Tony's cologne is sandalwood based. There's engine grease under his nails, and metal filings in his hair that he missed during his shower. Ms. Potts is using a cucumber-based scent, I'm guessing a French soap... And Steve, Steve smells like the saddle soap he uses on his gear, and the aftershave he's probably been using consistently since the 40's I'd wager." Hank smiled softly and Audrey turned and met his gaze.
There was less confusion in her expression and her breathing had synchronized with his slow, steady, pace. "Better?" He asked.
"Yeah... A lot." Audrey replied with a nod.
"Good."
Tony had kept his attention on Clint and Peter's banter, but kept his ear on the father-daughter interaction and moment of understanding, and a sense of satisfaction settled within him. The feeling of something going right for a change was wonderful.
A well-fed and content Tony was usually a sleepy Tony, so when he and Audrey passed out on the couch shortly after the movie started, Steve was perfectly okay with leaving them in-situ when the rest of the team retired for the night. Tony didn't ever sleep enough, and Steve would let him catch up when he could. He made sure that none of the photos that were taken used flash, dropped a blanket over them, and rearranged their legs for comfort before heading to his own room for the night.
When Audrey blinked awake in the morning light, she was still on the couch, under a blanket and Tony yawning beside her. Mac was on the floor next to them, panting happily and waiting patiently. Steve stood over them, holding two mugs of coffee. "Good morning, cuddle bugs." He said and smiled wide. "If you two were any cuter, I would sprout ovaries, I swear. It's ridiculous."
"Ugh, I so didn't need to start the day with that imagery." Tony groaned and made grabby hands for the coffee.
"I'll let it go, only because I feel I should reward you for sleeping through the whole night like a big boy." Steve said and handed over the mugs.
"Sheets are dry too." Audrey mumbled and rubbed her eyes, mindful as ever of her claws. Steve held back a snort of laughter.
"You're the worst teddy lion ever." Tony grumbled at her, and then eyed up Steve. "And you, momma bear, we'll discuss your fertility issues later. For now, coffee, and precognitive cuddles with aforementioned teddy lion. Her snark sucks. Cuddles are top notch though. A plus plus. Will cuddle again." Tony said and slumped back against Audrey's side. She rolled her eyes at Steve, but ruffled Tony's hair with her free hand.
"So, what's on tap for today?" Audrey asked.
"I thought you and I could start the day with some light ass-kicking in the gym. Tony, are you, Hank, and Bruce going to call Reed today?" Steve asked
"Yeah yeah." Tony muttered into his coffee cup.
"Really, Tony? You're not going to do this without him?"
"Yes, mom. I promise I will join Reed and his ugly face for study group." Tony said.
"Oh come on, don't you want to rip though the space-time continuum and have the chance to maybe blow something up in the process?" Steve teased.
"Blowing stuff up is fine. It's good for the soul. I just don't like fucking with time. It gives me the heebie-jeebies. But, speaking of this unpleasant concept, I think Audrey should come with us to speak to the past version of Hank." Tony said and took a long slurp of coffee.
"Why is that?" Steve asked.
"Because I think she'll be able to get through to him. The sight of her got to him a few days ago. I'm hoping that it will be as powerful a message."
"Okay, I'm willing to go with it, but you have to talk Hank and Reed into it." Steve said.
"Get me two more cups of this, and I could talk a nun out of her thong." Tony said, gazing lovingly at his mug.