Chapter Text
By the time they'd come back from their ice cream run, three things had happened.
First, UA had prepared a complete press statement that was ready for their review. The email from Ms. Kaneko (the PR Rep, Izuku assumed) came by 11 am, and the article was cold and clinical, simply debunking rumors with factual statements—exactly what a press release should be. It delivered cold hard facts about both Izuku and Katsuki's academic records and performance as provisional heroes, and the only sentiment it contained was from the injected quotes from their teachers. It was approved and posted on the UA website by noon.
Second, Izuku had texted the Class A group chat about the PR Rep's proposed social drive. Mina had whined about having to postpone the dick cake, but other than that, they were generally receptive. Momo had assured them that by the time they got back, the whole shebang would be ready to go. That statement had made them a little nervous. They didn't really know what a "whole shebang" would entail, and their classmates were extra as fuck on a good day. I mean...they'd made them a "Congrats on Being Gay For Each Other" penis cake with buttercream jizz.
Third, they'd been so distracted with Eri and Kota and the parent collection that they'd neglected to wear anything that would conceal their identities. No face masks, not hats, no sunglasses. So within an hour, #DynaDekuDate was trending because of a series of Instagram pics that had circulated at a shocking pace.
Katsuki and Izuku with Eri and Kota on their shoulders as ice cream dripped into their hair and their parents and Mandalay laughed. Katsuki letting Izuku try his ice cream while Eri and Kota watched, followed by a picture of Kota letting Eri try his ice cream. A shaky cell phone video of Mitsuki taking a spoonful of ice cream and smearing it across Katsuki's nose, cackling wildly. A picture of Izuku wiping it off for him, followed by a picture of him kissing Katsuki's nose while he blushed and pouted.
By the time Izuku had noticed his phone blowing up, they were already back on campus—Kota and Eri running ahead of them with the parental group right behind them. "Okay, I'm a little irritated at the lack of privacy, but look at these!" he cried, shoving his phone in front of Katsuki's nose, laughing when he jerked his head back and went a little cross-eyed to focus on the image in front of him.
"Nosy fucks," Katsuki grumbled, even as his eyes softened at the sight of Izuku leaning over to try his ice cream with a delighted smile and delicate blush. "Cute nerd," he teased.
"Me? Look at you, Kacchan," he teased right back. "You like me!"
Katsuki rolled his eyes. "We've established that, dork."
"Yeah, but you look like you like me! There's photo evidence! You look all soft and happy—"
"Call me soft again—"
"Ooooh, what're you gonna do," Izuku laughed. "Kiss me?"
Katsuki smirked and leaned in close, lips brushing Izuku's ear. "Spank you," he said, his harsh voice grating over Izuku's nerves.
Izuku blinked up at him when he pulled back, chest a little tight. Oh, that was because he was holding his breath. He exhaled shakily, eyes sharpening in consideration. "Promise?" he asked after a beat, mischievous grin growing.
Katsuki pulled him forward again, just to kiss him—slow and possessive. "Promise," he replied, his tone just a shade darker than before.
"Soft, Kacchan. You're soft as fuck. A big old softie," Izuku prattled off immediately, dodging Katsuki's arms as he lunged with a playful growl. He took off running, laughing wildly as Katsuki gave chase and they caught up to their parents. For some reason, he did not count on Katsuki full-body tackling him into the grass.
"Surrender nerd! You can't beat me!" he cackled, digging his fingers into Izuku's sides without mercy even as Izuku shrieked his surrender through pained laughter and squirmed violently in a desperate bid to escape.
"Well, at least we know it's still them," Inko chuckled.
"Do people beat each other up when they like each other?" Kota asked Mandalay, frowning.
She giggled. "They're roughhousing, not beating each other up, kiddo. It sounds like they've always been like this," she replied.
"Since they were in diapers," Mitsuki confirmed. "Wild animals, both of them."
When they finally got back to the dorm, they were both covered in dirt and grass stains—foliage stuck in Izuku's hair. "What happened to you two?" Ochako asked as they entered.
"The boys were trying to establish dominance, and just got muddy instead," Mitsuki replied for them, smiling wickedly. They flushed violently.
"HAG!"
"Auntie!"
"Thank god no one's started streaming yet," Ochako laughed. "You joining us, guys?" she asked, leaning down to talk to the kids.
"I don't know," Eri admitted. "What are you doing?"
"Well, yesterday someone made a really mean article about me and Kacchan," Deku explained. "So the rest of the class agreed to help us with the rumors by using social media and taking videos."
"Kota already gave us a really good video," Katsuki agreed, grinning devilishly at the irate boy.
"I didn't know she was making a video!" Kota argued.
"That's even better!" Izuku declared. "That means that you really meant what you were saying!"
Kota pouted, turning away with an embarrassed blush. "Whatever," he muttered petulantly. Mandalay was giggling behind him, and Katsuki saw him eye her foot as though he were tempted to stomp on it.
"What if I say something wrong?" Eri asked, nervous.
"Hey," Izuku soothed, kneeling to get her face to eye level. "You don't have to say anything! If you want you can just hang out. We love having you guys around!"
"Are you sure? I don't wanna get in the way if it's important," she replied.
"If anything, it'll be helpful to have you two here. It'll help Bakugou with his potty mouth," Ochako giggled.
"Watch it, Cheeks," Katsuki barked.
"Or what, hot head?" she asked, grinning wide.
"Or I'll make you the world's first floating grenade," he insisted.
"Eh, been there, done that," she shrugged. "Come on, Ms. Kaneko wants you to go over some of the responses we've prepared before we get started."
"We're gonna head out, boys," Mitsuki said, grabbing their attention. "But call us if you need any additional help. We're going to contact our lawyers about HeroStar."
They bid the parents farewell hastily as Ochako pulled them away from the doorway, Mandalay, Kota, and Eri trailing after them.
Once they were actually inside the common room, they were greeted by way more than the seventeen classmates they'd been expecting.
Namely, a healthy collection of support and business students and all of Class B had congregated and were listening to Yaomomo and Todoroki as they gave a run-down of the plan, with Ms. Kaneko in the back, nodding sagely.
Hatsume waved at him, smile small and hesitant. Izuku's heart clenched. She probably still felt bad about the baseball bat thing. He'd neglected to check in with her after that—it must have been scary to see him collapse like that. He waved back, hoping his smile conveyed that he was okay and grateful for her help. It must have done the trick because some of the tension loosened from her shoulders.
By the time Izuku officially tuned in to the conversation, Ochako had herded them onto the couches to catch the tail end of the debrief. "I've drafted some sample responses that you can use for the more common questions," Ms. Kaneko said, plugging her laptop into the TV monitor. "For the more complicated responses, there's a spreadsheet that I'd like you to use—enter the link to the post, the poster's username, and code it green, yellow, or red depending on how inflammatory it is. Then make sure to comment or reply by saying that their concern or question is valid, and will be addressed during Bakugou and Midoriya's official QA session in a week—date and time TBA on UA's social pages."
"Won't that make it sound like they're covering something up?" Hagakure objected. "Obviously we know better, but it'll sound like we're trying to buy time, right?"
"If that concern comes up, we'll address it by saying that this entire situation has put them on the spot, and they're overwhelmed as it is. Some questions simply require more thought, and they'd probably prefer to answer those questions themselves than have a classmate do it."
Katsuki was reading the responses on the screen, and Izuku could tell he was uncomfortable with the whole situation from the way his jaw rhythmically clenched and unclenched.
"Some of these answers are gonna lead to more questions," Katsuki eventually spoke up, voice gruff. "The statements made in the article were given by a classmate with a personal grudge.' They're gonna wanna know who," he explained when most of them turned to him to elaborate.
"Mr. Mineta's parents agreed to the terms of his punishment under the condition that no official statement name him directly," Ms. Kaneko explained. "Our spin is that in an effort to take the high road, you're declining to name names."
"I probably would have done that anyway," Izuku agreed, leaning into Katsuki's shoulder.
"Good," Ms. Kaneko smiled. "Now, if these responses are okay, we'll get started. You should stay out here to answer any questions your classmates have for a while. Then, once the flow feels a little easier, Class B has claimed you for their live stream," she told them. Izuku stiffened, eyeing the rival class warily. Tsuburaba was giving them a predatory grin, as was Kendo.
"Uh, why?" he squeaked.
"It's a surprise," Kendo replied ominously. "But we got it approved beforehand, don't worry."
"The face you're making right now doesn't exactly make me wanna trust you, BitchSlap," Katsuki sneered. Her grin only widened.
"That's actually a pretty good one, Bakugou," she replied, thrilled.
"All of his nicknames are good," Kirishima piped up, as eager as ever to defend his best friend.
"Well—" Deku began, remembering five-finger bitch-count vividly.
"Shut it, nerd. I fixed that one," Katsuki protested. Izuku's mouth snapped shut.
"He literally calls you 'Shitty Hair', Ei," Mina drawled.
"He's been downgraded to RockBlock," Katsuki snarked. "Because he's a cock-block and he's a rock."
"When did I cockblock you?" Kirishima demanded hotly, jumping to his feet. "I have been nothing but supportive, bro!"
"You told Deku to back off—"
"That was a misunderstanding!" he protested. "I thought he was dating Ochako!"
The room froze, and both Izuku and Katsuki's eyes zeroed in on him smelling blood in the water. He furrowed his brow in confusion, then his eyes widened comically as the blood drained from his face. "Ochako?" Izuku asked quietly, eyes flicking from Kirishima to the lady in question.
"Spill, Shark Boy," Katsuki demanded, eyes narrowing as he grinned—or rather, as he bared his teeth threateningly.
"A new plot twist," Tsuburaba whispered reverently. "We've been blessed."
"It's not what you think—" Kirishima insisted.
"We spent the entire week attached at the hip trying to cover for you!" Ochako interrupted hastily. "And we've known each other for three years, it's not weird that we're on a first-name basis—"
"He still calls Kacchan Bakubro," Izuku refuted, his gaze entirely too analytical for their taste.
"But I call other people by their first names!" he shot back. "I call Mina by her first name! And Hanta and Denki!"
"They're in your actual friend group, doesn't count!" Tokage crowed helpfully, beaming when Izuku pointed at her to emphasize his point.
"As entertaining as this is," Ms. Kaneko interrupted them loudly. "I think you should table it for later. The sooner we get this first part over with, the sooner you can continue your dramatic interrogations."
Both Kirishima and Ochako looked relieved, but the way Mina was eyeing them kinda should have tipped them off that they were in no way off the hook.
"I thought he liked Mina," Katsuki mumbled out of the corner of his mouth as Ms. Kaneko recaptured the attention of the excitable teenagers. "And could Kirby really get over you that fast?"
"I thought he liked you, so I have no idea what's happening anymore," Izuku muttered back.
"Makes me spill my whole life story to him and thinks he can keep secrets from me? I'll show him," he growled under his breath. Izuku chuckled, turning his head to press a quick kiss to his shoulder.
First-Name-Gate unforgotten but reprioritized, they split off into groups. The social media dig they'd done the previous night had been categorized, and different classmates addressed different questions and concerns based on the sheer volume of each category. It was all very organized, and Izuku couldn't help but be impressed by how it had all been pulled together so fast.
"Actually, Ms. Yaoyorozu did most of that," Ms. Kaneko exclaimed when Izuku asked her how she'd done it. "After they evaluated the overall response last night, she sorted the chatter as much as she could before sending it my way."
"Jesus fuck, did she even sleep?" Katuski asked, eyeing the obnoxiously thick folder in Kaneko's hands with poorly veiled horror.
"She emailed this to Aizawa at 1 am. He forwarded it to me when he woke up this morning," she smiled. "You've got some excellent friends in your corner."
Izuku smiled fondly. "We really do," he agreed.
"Hey dudes? I think I found some people from your middle school who are giving their take on the whole thing," Kaminari spoke up. He looked a little worse for wear but steely-eyed and ready to help.
Both Katsuki and Izuku tensed, glancing at each other. "What're they saying?"
"Uh," Kaminari glanced at his screen. "Split camp. Half of them are wondering how you haven't killed each other yet. The other half are glad you worked out your issues? Some of them are saying that your issues were just long-game sexual tension."
"Ugh, you can tell the long-game sexual tension idiots that they were right," Katsuki grumbled.
"He can?" Izuku asked, surprised.
"Well, I didn't fuckin' know that at the time, but yeah, kinda," Katsuki grumbled. "You were always following me and complimenting me and I didn't know how to deal with it. I didn't even really believe you were serious. I took it out on you," he shrugged.
"It would probably be better to tell them that they worked out their issues and repaired their relationship," Ms. Kaneko chimed in. "Even if that's the truth, I don't think the public would feel comfortable if it sounded like Midoriya rolled over just because Bakugou realized his feelings," she explained. "It's my understanding that it took hard work and a lot of communication to get to get to where you are now."
"Understatement," Katsuki replied, face pinching in distaste as he remembered the long, drawn-out conversations about his feelings that he'd been subjected to. "Let them know that I'll be attempting to explain myself in next week's QA."
Izuku frowned up at him. "Really?"
"Yeah," Katsuki shrugged. "I worked out a lot of it in therapy, might as well share. I'm shit at this but it might help or something."
"You don't—"
"Stop. I want to," he insisted, eyes narrowed as though challenging him to refute him. Izuku held up his hands, his eyes and smile warm with affection. "That's what I thought, dork."
"Deku?" Eri piped up, tugging the back of his shirt. "What's sexual tension?"
Everyone in the room saw their life flash before their eyes.