“I’ll eat your face”

“Why would you do that..”

Katie Britt, the junior Republican senator from Alabama, delivered the GOP’s rebuttal to President Joe Biden’s address on Thursday. Her impassioned, breathless speech — delivered at times in an ASMR-esque whisper from what appeared to be her kitchen — ended up feeling more like a rejected audition tape for a supporting role on “Grey’s Anatomy” than the hard-hitting political sparring favored by Biden’s Republican critics.

Into the late hours of the night, Rolling Stone was inundated, sometimes completely unprompted, with messages from longtime GOP operatives, right-leaning pollsters, conservative Capitol Hill staff, MAGA lawyers, and even some senior members of Trump’s own 2024 campaign absolutely torching Britt’s absurdly over-dramatic rebuttal.

“What the hell am I watching right now?” a Trump adviser asked, mid-Britt remarks.

“Creepy,” one of the Republican pollsters noted.

A lawyer working in the Trump orbit says the performance reminded them of public-access television, and a senior House congressional aide remarks that it was “cringe”-inducing to watch and likely destined to be turned into a “lame [Saturday Night Live] skit” this weekend.

“I’ll give Biden this — he at least gave a better speech than Katie Britt,” one national Republican consultant said bluntly.