how to cry

without tears

falling from my eyes

In this new Longreads essay, Megan Marz asks: why does the literary world still hold online writing at arm’s length? 

While it’s become banal to observe that online life is fully enmeshed with the rest of the world, an imaginary curtain separates online writing from the rest of U.S. literature. It’s time to take that curtain down.

People like to say the internet speeds reading up, but a personal blog, read in real time, can slow a story’s pace down to the timescale of life; the thickest book in existence can be read in less calendar time. Not even the author knew when a blog would end, which is what made it feel so alive.

I keep myself curled tightly in roots of an ancient tree, waiting for it to bear fruits of my labor, gathering strength to release weighted burdens, battling what once paralyzed me.

I set fault aside and carved our names with brittle nails and frozen fingers. I made deals with the sun to light a new path rather than chasing your shadow under a cold solstice moon.

If I were twice the man I could be, I'd still be half of what you'd need. You are suited for a stallion, And not an average steed.

I see the fire of passion burning Within the depths of your eyes. Never will they look my way, For I'm not worthy of such a prize.

If Death were your very name, A coward I shall become. So I may die a thousand deaths, To your tortures I shall succumb.

For you, I'd give up everything— All of my heart, my life, my soul. Sages are no better than fools When they let their hearts take control.

But... how bad could it be to be a fool If your heart is the prize to be won? Men have become fools for lesser things, And love makes fools out of everyone.

And I know you are not fond of me, But my love for you I can't ignore. I guess your friendship will suffice, For I can't hope for anything more.