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Noelle's Hideaway

@songofsilentechoes

RP blog by Echo, Avatar by the-storm-chaser
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Noelle arrives with some sweets for Zelda, and essences of sweets for Fi. "There's a holiday for appreciation of...close relationships...and I wanted to share some confections."

Zelda smiles having read about the holiday in the books graciously took her sweets seeming more princess-like today. She had cooked and put in a small heart-shaped container some traditional Gerudo Creamy Heart Soup. It seemed appropriate for the occasion. "You two have fun." She her sly smile as she gave Fi a pat on the back and left. Fi on the other hand was a nervous wreck letting out a small "eep" with the pat. "T-thank you very much... I-I was wondering if maybe we umm... I mean if I might go on a date? ImeanifIcantakeyouonadate. Would you go on a date with me?" (Nailed it)

Noelle was surprised to hear that from Fi, but her smile swiftly spread on her face. She leans in and gives the sword spirit a kiss on the cheek, lingering long enough to feel the closeness.

"I would love to go on a date with you, any time. Anywhere. Did you have somewhere in mind?"

Inside, she was squealing with delight. The idea of her beloved sword spirit asking HER out on a date was almost too much to contain.

"W-well I was thinking about a rather nice restaurant in Hyrule Castle of the Era of Twilight. They had quite wonderful... i believe in your world they would call it Gothic architecture. They are quite limited in their seating and prefer to only take a four parties each day. I have reserved a sunset timeframe if that is agreeable." She had already planned for a while on this. Then again when someone can move freely in time making reservations a week ago could just as well have been a year in someone else's time. "We have all the time available to us would you care to go dress shopping first? I know I have sprung this on you suddenly."

Noelle was taken by surprise. For a formal dinner, she probably would've just worn her formal academic uniform when she taught magic. But Fi wanted to go dress shopping with her?

"Dress shopping with you, followed by a sunset dinner with you?"

She smiles brightly. "I would love that, Fi. I'm curious what sort of dresses you like."

Of course she was ready. She was always ready to spend time with the sword spirit.

"Truth be told I am a rather poor judge of fashion. I have lived long enough to see so many styles come and go that I am unsure what is currently in style. I also travel to other worlds so it is even more difficult to judge. I am afraid I have given up." A portal opened as if set up in advanced from another time. With Fi's detailed memory of every waking moment feats like this were only a minor bother. Remember this time for in the future to go to the past and open this portal and leave to proper time. All layed out in a web of tangled timelines and universes. She truly did not exist in this dimension. "If you are ready, this era had wealthy people that can be a bit on the snobbish side. Ignore them, you are above their status anyway."

"Oh, I'm not too worried about if it's fashionable. I'm more curious what *you'd* like." Noelle re-stated with different emphasis. Still Fi's assurances were always so refreshing and welcome.

"Era?" She asked. Noelle had long stopped trying to comprehend the sort of power Fi has access to. Hopping realms was difficult enough, but Fi was effortlessly capable of such feats AND traversing time...wholly unbound by time's whims. No...it was more like she could chart her own course through it.

Noelle didn't normally consider herself a person of much consequence. But hearing Fi, a being forged by a divine, state that she holds a greater status is truly a compliment she wasn't ready for. She blushes brightly as her hand fidgets with her cloak as she smiles.

"Thank you, Fi." She said as she stepped through. Normally she might be fearful of the unknown. New realms were always something to brace herself for. But with Fi, she felt at ease in a way she never did when traveling alone.

It was Hyrule. Not a new realm but Hyrule who knows how many thousands of years ago. The castle, this castle was a bit different but whole and complete. The streets were lined with shops, merchants, and people going about their day. It was as busy as it could get however when Fi came though it got very very quiet. People crowded to see what was the source of this and then fell silent themselves. "Becalm... and proceed on your way." It was like a holy blessing had been said. People bowed and hurriedly rushed to get out of her way. Some almost falling over like they expected her to lash out and take the good fortune they had. "My apologies, Mistress Noelle. It may be best if I join you on your back as a sword. I can guide you and we would stand out less."

Noelle stepped out of the portal and into what appeared to be a thriving castle town, although far different than the one she knew.

Immediately the tone of the crowd shifted when Fi appeared and they seemed to want to revere her. It really reminded Noelle of just how close to the core faiths of these lands Fi was.

She looked to Fi. "That's fine." She said, then smiling. "I don't mind carrying you, or keeping you close." Part of her really relished the idea of holding her close. A companion. Her companion.

It was hard not to feel at least a little possessive.

"Where to, Fi?"

Fi turned to Noelle then handed her a mask that had not been with her a moment ago, another gift from the future. It was rather ugly looking like a lump of stone on the front however it had magical energy flowing though it.

"This is the Stone Mask, it works much like camouflage but to ones perception. Wearing this is much like being invisible though it does not bend light but the minds of those who view it. Some are able to see you if they are powerful enough. I suggest you wear this if people are coming at you in religious fervor. It is quite idiotic to be worshiped however this era was quiet bad about making up etiquette for not logical reason. I would equate it to earths Victorian era. I do not come here often." Fi sighed and transformed into a sword placing herself on Noelle's back. A few of the people "not looking" gave audible gasps and whispered amongst themselves. "We have a good few hours to look around, if you are hungry I suggest you follow your nose." It was true there were many shops, food stalls, and restaurants with ever mingling smells and displays. "If you wish to look at clothing we should go to the central plaza, most of the clothing stores for high society are located there."

Another mask from Fi. This one had an extraordinarily useful ability, even if it's stony appearance left something to be desired. She places the stone mask on her forehead, and lifts her hood up on top.

"These masks are fascinating." Noelle comments as she lowers it onto her face and sees the crowd lose interest in them quickly. She smiles a little to herself. What a wonderful thing this was.

"I suppose some food would be lovely, and it would be interesting to see what they have during this era." A restaurant date sounded especially lovely, but knowing she couldn't share the food with Fi without her device with her made it so she was more inclined towards street vendors. She would have to find a way around that someday.

"Do they still take rupees?" She asks, as she begins to navigate the crowd. The passerby do not try and avoid her, so she weaves through them instead. Occasionally, she gets up on a box to look around, taking in the sights and smells...and seeming pleasantly relaxed that she's not attracting significant attention.

Oh, there was a good smell coming from over there.

"Someday I may teach you how to create masks... though... it is not pleasant. These masks... well lets not ruin our good mood today. Yes, they all take rupees. An attempt was made to create and monetize gold coins at one time. This failed however when a very wealthy man bought up 80% of the minted coins and horded them. He was cursed for his greed and turned to a golden statue. He has since been freed by my Master of this era however the gold coins had already stopped production as they were seen as a complete failure." Fi had little to do but entertain Noelle with conversation however it was nice to be on someone's back again. "Oh what do you smell?"

"Fascinating. I would love to learn the art from you." Noelle replies.

"I'm glad they take rupees. That makes things easier." Since coming to Hyrule, she's managed to gather some amount of rupees by following Linkle's instructions and the occasional oddjob.

"It smells like...roasted meats, although I can't place the other scent with it."

She navigates the crowd a bit, before deciding instead to hop along some boxes and a low wall. Soon enough, the area opens up and there are several street vendors hawking various wares.

"I think...yes, that one there." A vendor was selling meat skewers, spiced with something, as well as accompanied by small potatoes and mushrooms. "Oh, there's a fishmonger too." The short woman was clearly charmed and delighted by the bustling marketplace, especially while standing apart from it on the boxes.

After taking in the view a bit longer, she hops off the box and approaches the meat skewer vendor, lifting the mask up from her face and onto her forehead, like a visor. "Excuse me!~ I'd like one of the meat skewers, please!" She says as she reaches to her belt to take out the bag where she's been keeping her rupees.

"Ah yes the woman selling fish is Hena. Her family has owned a plot of land on the upper part of the Zora River for some time. Master Link was quite fond of fishing and that particular place is quite the spot for rare fish to breed, as such she is quite knowledgeable when it comes to fish." The sword sees quite a few familiar faces in the crowd giving her a sense of nostalgia. "That meat is from the Ordon goats. I would ask if he has any goat cheese to go alongside it. Ordon pumpkin honey wine is also apparently quite good. However we may need to go to Telma's bar to get some."

Noelle smiles and glances back at the blade as the man prepares a skewer for her. "You want it glazed, little miss? Honey's fresh today."

"Oh! Yes please." She replied as he nodded and began to pour some onto the skewer, giving it a quick sear to lock it onto the skewer.

"There ya go. Anythin' else I can get ya?"

"You wouldn't happen to have any goat cheese, would you?"

"A'course." He says, taking a larger cheese wheel and chopping off a chunk for her. "Here ya go. That'll be twenty rupees."

Noelle nods and reaches into her pouch to produce the correct number of glimmering shards to give to him. "Thank you, sir!~" She says sweetly as she walks off to another part of the market.

She hops up onto a box, looking out across the market as she takes a bite from the piping-hot skewer. "Oh! Hot hot..." She fans her tongue a little before blowing a little on the skewer for her next bite.

Fi did not bother to tell Noelle to be careful of hot foods. She had learned from her Master that no matter how much she warned all people would ignore her on this matter in particular. "So as far as outfits go there are many shops for them, however there are also other stores you might take interest in as well. Far be it from me to keep you from exploring." Fi scanned the area for other people of interest though found none except a goron selling rare minerals at twice the price she thought they should be. "Are you enjoying your food?"

Noelle took the bite and chewed on it before swallowing.

"I am, yes. It's quite good. I'll need to make one sometime so you can enjoy the essence of it, sometime. I think you might enjoy the sensation."

"I'll explore a little," She replies, looking out across the market, "But aside from the outfit shops you had in mind, I doubt I'll buy anything." She chuckles. "I like markets quite a lot, but they can usually be a little overwhelming for all the people. But with this mask, I feel like a ghost here." With that, she reaches up and runs her hands along Fi's cross guard, as a little acknowledgement and thanks for enabling this situation.

Once she's finished her meal, she would slide the mask more securely over her face and adjust her hood again before she wanders around the market, looking at the various shops. She lingers a little at a potion vendor, but she's clearly just window-shopping and has no intent to make a purchase. Other shops and stalls she looks at with a more academic eye, as if trying to analyze the wares for magical potential. However, she's mostly just enjoying this outing with Fi, and the sensation of having her all to herself for the afternoon.

Soon enough, she gently touches Fi's cross guard again. "Alright...where were the outfit shops you had in mind, Fi?"

"Interesting. Trading one problem for a different one based on available resources. That makes sense to me."

She chuckles.

"Then it's all the more reason to continue innovating, right? New solutions and opportunities. I bet if this keeps up, you all will have a spellbook of your own that can do all sorts of things." She says, gesturing with her cellular telephone.

"Something like that - we are sorting out solutions, but the people who make money off of the current solutions are fighting tooth and nail against it." To bad you can't fix humanity.

"..Well, somewhat? We do have a 'spellbook', but it is all digital - as in, only influences other technology-" The woman took out her smartphone.

"I can move money around, watch videos, talk to people on the other side of hte world, track my eating, send written messages to people, order food to be delivered to my house - when I say I out loud, most functions boil down to sending and recieving information.

If we could have apps - well, 'spells' that actually influence the world around us independant of other technology, that would really be something."

"Give it time, Iyana. Hopefully there will be a solution that works around the people profiteering from it." Noelle replied.

"Besides, in the meantime, we have people like you, working hard on new breakthroughs."

Skyway City Tina's motors.

Tina sighed as she got her step stool and climbed upmto the counter, grabbing her tools, being a mouse girl in Paragon blew when you barely pushed four feet, she would of thrown in the towel on her job if not for the Praet invasions giving her a helper in the form of Bob, a towering bulking clock work she rebuilt.

Looking over her shoulder, she smiled watching Bob easily lift the engine out of the car they where working on, moving it to one side before his hands unfolded into a series of tools as he started disassembling it.

She grabbed her wrench and climbed down, walking over and looking at it. "What do ya think big guy?" She asked, patting his calf.

"At least one, maybe two faulty pistons, the fact they drove it into the shop is a miracle." He rumbled.

Tina nodded when she heard footsteps, turning around, she saw three Trolls enter the shop, their beady eyes looking around as they held a variety of clubs, taking a breath, Tina looked up. "Howdy, welcome to Tina's motors, how can I help ya?"

The lead troll grinned. "Little lady, protection." He growled.

Tina frowned, backing up to Bob. "I'm sorry, but I'm not on any gangs territory, I don't owe protection to no one."

The troll grunted. "New gang, new rules, pay mouse." He swung his club at one of the benches, scattering tools and parts. "Now."

She sighed. "Bob, open up."

The large clockwork nodded and bent the knee, his chest opening up as Tina jumped in, quickly situating herself in the command cradle, Bob's chest swung closed as he stood to his full hight, towering over the trolls, Tina's voice coming from a loud speaker. "Right, I'll make this simple cuz you lot aren't to smart, I'm not paying protection, so get the hell out of my shop."

The Trolls growled and charged, time for her to test out the modifications she did to Bob, in theory he would move like her and she had earned herself a few belts in martial arts classes.

The first troll swung, Bob sliding out of the way like quick silver according to Tina's input, lashing out with a large metal hand in a palm strike that sent the green thug dealing, before Bob did a snap kick, sending the troll out the door.

The two other gangers charged, Bob weaving and ducking their simple blows, new gang alright, these guys had obviously never been in a real fight before as Bob pulled off a round house kick, cracking their skulls.

As quickly as it begun, it was over, Bob's chest opening up as Tina looked out. "Holy shit, it worked big guy, we did it! Now you go get some chain while I call the cops. Tie them up by the light poll." She clambered out, dropping to the floor and running inside as Bob got some thick chain.

Later.

Officer Jasmine Briar looked over the scene as her partner attached Zig porters to the unconscious trolls. "So let me get this right, these trolls harassed you for protection money.... So you maned an unlicensed suit of power armour and took the law into your own hands?"

Tina nodded nervously, not just because the cop was a cat girl and she was a mouse girl, but because the way she said unlicensed sounded serious.

Jasmine looked at her notes. "Look, I don't want to be a baddy here... So I will write that you are a registered hero, waiting on your paper work, but that only works if you register within the week., okay?"

Tina looked up at Bob. "Er.... If we don't register?"

The officer sighs. "Then I have to fine you for an unregistered suit of power armour."

Tina nods. "I guess we got no choice then Bob."

The next day. Atlas Park. City Hall.

Tina sat in front of the desk, dressed in her best suit, Bob wedged into a chair next to her also dressed up, because she knew how some people got around naked clockwork, as the government official read over their paper work.

Noelle Minette (Paragon version) looked over their paper work. "Well it has been a while since we have had a duo join, you say Mr Bob is your power armour, but also has his own free thinking AI?"

Tina nods. "Three years of work miss... Um, is that a problem?"

"Not at all, you are signing up as a singular hero, so I'll just make sure your paper work is in order, please give up to five business days for your hero licence to arrive in the mail... I just need a name?"

Tina grins. "We will be known as Tiny Bob."

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"...There is something almost...refreshing about the kinds of things people from other worlds find novel? Like, they ahve elixers that cure all ailments but do not have soda, or flying airships but not airplanes. You can teleport form one place to another in the blink of hte eye..but they do not have the internet."

"It's neat, right? Normally I'd need to use a sending spell or something to get a message to someone. But you all have cellular telephones to make it easy and without mana cost. And they don't even plug into the wall, like all your appliances!"

"Not to mention you all have had moving pictures for a LOT longer than I have. As well as automated vehicles that move without horses OR magic."

"That is the wonders of technology: they say that limitation breeds creativity. It does not require mana, but it does require elecricity, and they did have to be plugged into the walls for the longest time.

And the vehicles rely on combustable fuels for energy, which is rather bad for the planet all in all-"

"Interesting. Trading one problem for a different one based on available resources. That makes sense to me."

She chuckles.

"Then it's all the more reason to continue innovating, right? New solutions and opportunities. I bet if this keeps up, you all will have a spellbook of your own that can do all sorts of things." She says, gesturing with her cellular telephone.

Floating up from the ground, slowly peeking into the window of Noelle's apartment, August softly knocks on the window. Hopefully, avoiding the doorbell avoids agitating the menagerie inside. If all of the critters are there, that is. Really, she just needs to speak to the mage, though one of the other magically inclined beings may be able to assist as well.

Noelle is quietly sitting at the window, having a smoke, when suddenly she sees August float up from ground level.

"Wha-!?" She exclaims, nearly dropping the lit cigarette, which she quickly snuffs out. "August?! What-How? Uh- H-Hey...." She says, smiling; trying, and failing, to be smooth.

If it didn't threaten to derail her focus and the speed at which she was getting ready, August definitely would have made some comment about how cute it was when Noelle got excited about magic. The passion she had was more than a little infectious, or would be if this wasn't a passion project already.

"Alright, meet you downstairs then." Smiling she dropped to the ground, scarf briefly trailing behind her as she descended. Once on the ground, the smith leaned against the wall, wearing a gentle smile that grew just a bit as Noelle came outside, offering a hand for anything she needed help carrying... Or just for her hand.

"Shall we then? I think you'll have a lot of interesting thoughts once you see this!"

The door opens, silent as ever, and she locks it behind her. She always looked the same when she was out, even with a satchel laden with books, the messenger bag looked about like it always did. Her cloak was on, and the hood up.

She smiled when she saw August and, with a little spring in her step, walked over to her, accepting the hand. "I'm looking forward to it. I've no idea what you need help with, but I'm happy to do what I can!"

Rainald would approach Noelle with a weak smile. "Hey... I need to thank you for what you did for me... and I'm sorry this took so long... and I'm truly sorry for worrying you so much." The knight was holding his left arm and rubbing it a bit while avoiding eye-contact. "If you have the time... I can explain what happened that day."

Noelle looked deeply worried, although she'd gotten some sleep since he last saw her. Wicht was sitting on her shoulder, arms folded and looking a little cross.

"I'm just glad you're okay. You scared me half to death. I don't know the afterlife in your realm enough to be confident that I could bring you back if you crossed over..."

Wicht pokes Noelle's cheek. "Hey! Don't distract him. I wanna hear what happened."

"Agreed, the faster I fully recover, the faster we can better prepare for another encounter with my counter-part. With any luck, he'll not show himself again until we have some measures prepared for him... or at the very least a nice bargaining chip that will assure he'll be a little slower to stab either of us. I don't know what his weapon was made of, but I don't wish to feel that steel again," He'd sigh before taking the cup from Noelle and taking a sip before relaxing into the couch.

"Let's start setting the groundwork for our own possible counter-attack. The sooner we visit Miss Caitlyn and your sisters, the sooner we can start with some experiments. I'm not going to practice with Berserk Magic anytime soon, but I do wish to see how this petricite affects me. That might actually be something that impacts a lot actually. I was unaware that a place on this planet actually produces a product such as that..." He'd frown while he thinks about the reasons behind making such.

Noelle nods and takes a seat opposite him on the chair at the worktable, having turned it to face him.

"Caitlyn says it's having to do with some political issues their lands have, as well as paranoia from an event called the 'Rune Wars', that happened a long time ago. From my understanding, it was a conflict centered around objects of immeasurable power. The forces at work changed the land forever. But that's where my understanding of it ends. Demacia appears to be rather pristine and prosperous, at least on the outside, but their distrust of mages means it's not safe to go there....at least for the likes of you or me." She says, sipping her coffee.

"I want to give you some time to rest a little. We could go to Caitlyn's manor tonight, but it might be better to give you a day or two to rest before we really dig into stuff. If you don't want to wait that long, we can probably do some planning, which won't be as physically taxing."

Rainald went quiet for a moment while he pondered what to do. There was a lot going on in his head at the moment, from the problems that could occur with Demacia, should he ever accidentally find his way there, to visiting Caitlyn and getting to work on their prep-work. He disliked waiting for a threat to come instead of handling it, and he greatly disliked holding off on work that needs to be done... But these injuries aren't the type that he can get right back into doing his normal work. The damage on the surface was repaired, but he needs to be sure that there were no other forms of wounds that couldn't be seen.

He would let out a heavy sigh before taking another sip of the coffee and then look at Noelle. "Rest," He'd insist, if it was to her or himself was unknown. "I should rest. Through all this excitement, I haven't bothered to check if anything that your medicine can't touch was damaged... And if I still need more repairs. That weapon was able to effortlessly put five holes in my body... There is a strong chance that it could've cut things we can't see. While I'm sure your medicine and Wicht's help more than patched me up, I need to be sure."

Noelle nodded. "That mixture is good, but it can't work miracles. I'll need to apply more soon. I really thought I'd lost you back then..."

She turns a little and looks at her worktable. "I really should work on healing magics, but until such a time, alchemical salves are the best I can offer."

"At the least, it's better than my own methods of healing. As I said before, unless you study healing magic on my home, this is more first-aid than actually healing. The soothing effects of the mixture certainly helped me get the rest I needed. Though I would never discourage someone from practicing and learning more magic. If you think it'll be useful, go for it. Given your situation, being able to go over to an ally during a situation, quietly heal them, and then disappear before an enemy combatant or something along those lines discovers you would be a massive boon."

Rain would look towards the areas where his wounds were. "The reapplication of the salve... Um... It's not going to hurt... Right?" He'd question a bit since he was going to be awake for it this time.

"No. It shouldn't. Part of the substance that goes into it numbs and soothes the area a little. Plus, you would've had the worst of it during the first, since you were bleeding out on me. This isn't the sort of thing that can set bones. It's a cleaning/healing agent, but it can't work miracles. I'd need to set bones first, and THAT would hurt. This will clean and heal flesh wounds, as well as make it a little easier if we need to stitch anything closed."

"Overuse of this stuff will make you hungry and dehydrated, though, as it uses the body's natural resources to accelerate the healing process. So...keep that in mind and tell me if you're feeling peckish or thirsty."

"...There is something almost...refreshing about the kinds of things people from other worlds find novel? Like, they ahve elixers that cure all ailments but do not have soda, or flying airships but not airplanes. You can teleport form one place to another in the blink of hte eye..but they do not have the internet."

"It's neat, right? Normally I'd need to use a sending spell or something to get a message to someone. But you all have cellular telephones to make it easy and without mana cost. And they don't even plug into the wall, like all your appliances!"

"Not to mention you all have had moving pictures for a LOT longer than I have. As well as automated vehicles that move without horses OR magic."

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Jingle is tempted to go outside the manor and pose for photographs.

"If you do go out, please take the baby, he'd love to have some opportunities to show off his wingies and sick poses" She snickers and sighs.

If nothing else, the fact that Jingle can't answer questions with words might annoy the hell out of the reporters--

@songofsilentechoes

Jingle giggles and scoops up Nova to use the newshounds as a free audiance for their latest performance!

The Piltover gossip papers will have a field day speculating what it means to have a jester leave Kiramman manor and the nature of her performances.

But they all agree that Nova is adorable.

If you want to interact with me and don’t, tell me why:

☹ I’m an anxious mess who’s too scared to approach people

⚠ I’m intimidated by your writing

⌚ I have no time right now and need to wait until I’m less busy

☯ I can’t see how our muses would meet/interact

✂ I sent you something and you never replied

✒ You’re mutuals only and you don’t follow me because I’m a side blog

✑ I’m a side blog and I’m worried you don’t know about my blog or don’t want to interact with a side blog

☢ Your rules intimidate me

❧ I feel like your blog is too organized compared to mine

☒ I’m worried my blog isn’t fancy enough for you

⌇ Your face claim makes me uncomfortable

✎ I can’t write long enough replies and don’t want to annoy you

☾ I feel like I bother people

⚔ Our headcanons don’t align to the point where our muses couldn’t interact

⚖ I see you interacting with a select group of people and am worried you don’t want to interact with new people

⚐ English isn’t my first language and that makes me nervous to approach people

✉ I don’t know how best to contact you

☆ Other: ____________ (write in your own reason)

🧠 + All four Minettes should get matching family shirts.

Trinity: "Oh, that would be so lame..."

Noelle: "Well, I think it could be fun. We don't do a lot of things together."

Jingle makes a happy chime! She thinks this will be fun, too!

Noelle: "See? It'll be fun. I bet Jingle wants one for Nova, too."

Trinity: "Fine, fine..." She replies with a smirk. "Make sure Roelle gets in on this, too."

🧠 "I might look good in a collar... would I get pets?"

"I do still have the one with the little cowbell from the cowkini incident...I kept it after because it was cute. A pity it doesn't make sound on me."

"I bet others would look alright on me too..."

"....and p-pets would be nice..."

🧠 + "I should buy that bag of sweets, a small treat"

"Things have been going rather well. A little something sweet would be nice. Normally I'd get the cheap one, but...let's get the nicer one today."

This one passed through her without much introspection.

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GASP!

Did not know mama was so strong and good at the pushing like friend doggo human! Clearly, Mama is also strong as well as smart!

"Ehehe...yeah...let's call it that."

🧠 How, exactly, do I convince more pretty ladies to appear at my window and call me princess...?

"It really can't be as simple as just being a damsel in distress, right? Surely it's more that I'd be actually desirable in some way...but-"

"Wait. What am I doing?"