He started off as a genderbent Katya. Not sure what he is now.

yeah no offense to confucius or anything but if i was about to embark on a journey of revenge i would simply not dig two graves

jesus christ, getting laid in your enemy's grave? that's some freak shit but honestly i kinda dig it

well yeah you dig it thats how you make a grave

A feel like this is a conversation between  Shakespeare's clowns, and I love that.

Ignoring me means you agree to kill me, my child and my family, I am Hadeel from Gaza 🍉 My husband was killed and I became a widow in this war and my child is an orphan, my mother and I are now homeless, we have been displaced more than 14 times, my child needs milk and diapers every day and I cannot provide them, we are 13 people who need water and food, understand the suffering we are going through and give us 💰 Please talk about my story and write about it to help us survive

Please, after my first campaign was stolen, this campaign I created a short time ago was documented, but it was never published. Please respond to me and help me spread the word. Please donate to us even if it is five dollars, do not ignore us I beg you

@90-ghost @moremyceliumnetworks @4ng3l-1z-d3d @ibtsmemes @atomic-chronoscaph @ghoulaug @gazafunds @gotinterest @gaza-evacuation-funds @nabulsi @a-shade-of-blue @shelbybunny @alexarken

Saying ‘awh big hit’ every time your pup sputters or coughs after smoking off the bong ~

Watching the tears prick in their pretty eyes while you shush them and pet their hair, telling them how good they take it and how pretty they look while they smoke. Each compliment making them that much more embarrassed, plush puppy hips rutting uselessly into the couch cushion before picking them up to gently rest on your thigh.

Lifting their chin and blowing smoke in their face before grinding back into them, letting them get all riled up, trailing light fingers up their sides and kissing them softly only to stop and remind them they’re supposed to be smoking right now~

it's all honey

Do you mind if I put my feet in your lap I mean sorry I mean do you mind if I just rest them here fuck sorry I meant do you mind if I place my feet in your lap and wiggle my toes around a little while you tell me about your day sorry I mean

You ever get a desire to get as close as physically possible to someone? Nuzzle your nose into them, rub your cheek against them, hands all over, pressing firmly yet gently into their skin. Maybe your legs are entangled with one another’s, maybe you’re in their arms. Maybe someone’s inside the other, and you’re just lying there together, existing together. Close.

okay so i finished checking if we were friends in every universe and, uh, it turns out we're only friends in 6 of them. but look, i need you to understand these universes vary like crazy, okay? like 6 is actually insanely high, like way higher than most. and one of those is the universe where i accidentally killed the actor who played Dipsy from Teletubbies when i was 7 and my life went completely differently as a result. and we still ended up friends! also you were a girl in that universe for some reason. what? oh, uh, yeah, you were cute as hell. like really cute. did you just fucking giggle

need my toes tonguefucked tbh :/

girls who take a couple hits too many and start whining about needing something to keep their mouth busy PLEASE come closer so that i can protect you from anybody who might try to take advantage of it. i know this world is scary but i promise i can keep you safe if you just let me put my fingers in your mouth i mean fingers no i mean if you just let me finger your mouth i meant mouth sorry i meant if you just let me fuck your mouth if you just

fuck you tiny tits are real

The funniest part about liking Serious Angst Themes while simultaneously fixating on a silly blorbo from my show is that 13 year old me would be writing the exact same type of fanfics as me now. Real tragedy enjoyers know ts for life

Me: what if my favorite characters smoked cigarettes ans has severe trauma 😈

13 year old me: And drank alcohol and had horrible coping mechanisms too

Me: thats badass. I like the way you think

13 year old me: stop saying cusswords my mom Will get mad

Me: sorry

13 year old me: why are you a boy

Me: We're getting off topic.

god dammit, just battled an ancient evil too powerful to defeat alongside my heroic allies and now they're all talking about "locking it away" and "binding it in a vessel" we are soooooo fucked

the party mage just brought up the idea of each one of us taking a part of the sealing artifact to prevent them from being reunited again and releasing the evil, no way these dumb assholes aren't getting corrupted 🤦

okay so after a little time bonding with my shard of the blackstar, I've decided that 1) this was actually a pretty good idea and 2) all the armies of the earth must tremble before me

You know, it’s okay to want to be a girl. You’re not wrong, you’re not a pervert for that. You can be a girl.

He learned his lesson

Nah you guys don’t get it. For all that Gandalf complained about Pippin, he better than anyone else knew that Pippin was absolutely crucial. Pippin accomplishes a very impressive feat: not only does he manage to see something in the palantír (most hobbits would perceive nothing, as these stones were designed for use by high elves), but he manages to close his mind against Sauron. That is a seriously impressive feat of ósanwë given Pippin’s youth and almost total inexperience. The only clue Sauron manages to glean from the meeting with Pippin is that he is in Meduseld: which Pippin probably did not even directly give to him. Pippin did not tell Sauron his name, so Sauron is led to believe that Pippin is Frodo. I remind you, in the books, the Good Guys manage to trick Sauron, by making him believe that Aragorn has claimed the One Ring. They can only do that because of Pippin’s ridiculous feat of ósanwë. Far from sabotaging the mission, he is the one who allows it to succeed (albeit, not on purpose). This is why Sauron doesn’t think anything is fishy when Aragorn wins the Battle of the Pelennor Fields by controlling ghosts: that would be consistent with the idea that he is using the One Ring. Which Sauron believes that Pippin brought to him. This is why Sauron pulls out his old “play nice and weak” card from his Númenor days. He first of all believes that Aragorn is a lot more powerful than he actually is, and secondly thinks that the Ring is beginning to affect him.

He should perhaps have remembered that Aragorn is named for Fingolfin. Fingolfin’s mother-name, Arakáno, would properly be translated to Sindarin as “Aragorn”. Most people would not show up to an enemy fortress with an army they knew was far too small, and start a battle they knew they would lose. But Fingolfin famously did exactly that.

When you read the line “fool of a Took!” It is important to understand that in the context of Gandalf calling himself a fool on several occasions. Galadriel too sees beyond the veneer of foolish naivety in Pippin. She gives him and Merry belts that almost definitely were once her brothers’. A golden flower on a gift from Galadriel can only be a golden lily, the sigil of the House of Finarfin. Galadriel, while all hell was breaking loose in Tirion, raided her brothers’ rooms and took their belts from when they were little kiddos, hauled them across the Helcaraxë, and then held onto them for three Ages before giving them to two hobbits she just met. Merry, of course, is comparable to Angrod and Aegnor: his great deed is done in a moment of beserk rage, and it is a feat of strength. This then implies that she is comparing Pippin to Finrod. That’s one hell of a complement coming from Galadriel: but as I just pointed out, entirely warranted. Pippin manages to reproduce Finrod’s feat of radio silence, in the face of torture by Sauron. Which again, is extremely impressive given that Pippin is far younger and less experienced than Finrod was.

You see me <3