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I Saw the TV Glow (2024)
A haunting and beautiful allegory with a clear demographic in mind
This isn't a typical horror movie. It's more of an exploration of the paralyzing pain, loneliness and confusion that many face as they try and reconcile why they're "different," told through neon hues, nostalgic, liminal vibes and a dash of hallucinatory surrealism thrown in.
It's a minimalist movie as the plot largely revolves around two high school outcasts who bond over a TV show. The "horror" of the movie stems from the actions - and inactions - they both take from their shared time together and seeing the effect this has on each of them over the course of their lives - often told in a non-linear fashion.
Ultimately this is a movie with a message and whether or not you understand that message will likely determine if your enjoyment the movie or not.
For my part, I know I'm not the target demographic, but the movie still resonated with me deeply as a former high school outcast. I would recommend it to anyone who was (or is) a lonely kid who has experienced the terrifying and paralyzing dread of facing a choice that you know will alter your relationship with the broader world forever.
My only real issue with this movie is the ending. I won't spoil anything, but in my opinion, and from my experience, I feel like this movie sets up a false dichotomy in order to dive the horror of the choice home. I don't agree with this, but then again, it's just a movie and I think the ending makes a lot of sense Given the point the movie is trying to make.
Hell Hole (2024)
Dumb Fun B Movie Creature Feature
This is a fun, low budget, creature feature that has more pros than cons: it's funny, the charters actually have personality, there are some fun practical effects (and some terrible ones too) and the directing & editing are competent. I wanted something fun and silly to put on and this hit the mark.
If you're a sucker for creature features and find guilty pleasure in cheesy movies then you'll probably enjoy this.
Main complaints are too much dialog but not enough one-liners (if they'd gone over the top with the silly effects or cheesy dialog I would have liked it more and would probably bumped my rating up) and the ending was... abrupt & bad.
To be fair, this movie is a 5, not a 6, but so many folks are hating on it I wanted to give a little more love because this film definitely has an audience with people like me.
Terrifier 2 (2022)
Sick, Demented and Exactly What I Expected
I watch the first Terrifier and the brutality of it left an impression on me so I had a pretty good idea what I was in for watching the second one. Let me just say this one goes over the top, and I had to look away more than once!
If you liked the first at all, here are some things that make this one better:
1) stronger story: there's a back story to the characters that gives purpose to the fight
2) more / better kills: after all, that's why we're here, isn't it...
3) introduction of a larger supernatural element: this was hinted at in the first movie, but plays a much stronger role here. I like this, because it opens up the possibility for a larger "terrifier" universe a la James wan
4) bad ass final girl: I'll be honest, I now have a crush on Lauren LaVera and am looking forward to her next flick "Well"
My main complaint is it was too long. That's a general statement but that means there were lots of bad scenes that could have been cut, some plot points that seemed shoehorned in, and other moments where I was like, "yeah yeah, let's move this along", but these are relatively minor complaints considering the movie gave me exactly what I asked for.
All in all this movie is completely bonkers in over the top but if you'd like the first one, you'll love the second.
Pearl (2022)
Amazing Character Study & Film
I love horror and I liked Ti West's "X", but this is something else entirely. It's a deep character study brought to life by Mia Goth and spectacularly shot in a vintage, 1950s style. This is art first, "horror" second.
If you're looking for an easy slasher, this isn't it: it's slower, more textured and more abstract than a slasher, but if you want to see a beautiful, and relatable, descent into madness: this is amazing.
While I enjoyed the movie broadly, there were two scenes that absolutely stood out as Oscar worthy
1) The monologue where Pearl is speaking, "fictionally", to her husband
2) the final credits with "the smile".
Both my wife and I were mesmerized by both scenes and walked away haunted, and amazed.
Wednesday (2022)
Harry Potter Meets Riverdale With Tim Burton's Flair
This show mixes a lot of the elements from successful franchises like Harry Potter and Riverdale then backs it up with a lot of the original dark humor and lore from the Addams family. The result is a bit of a "super powered teen soap opera murder mystery" and, while this mix could easily flop, "Wednesday" totally makes it works.
A big part of the success is due to Jenna Ortega's amazing performance. She's perfect as Wednesday but the supporting cast, especially Emma Myers, also deliver in their performances in a way that's campy, fun, but also heartfelt. The direction and production value are also solid. Totally a quality show.
While I haven't finished the series yet, my only complaint would be this: I think there's some inconsistency between the Addam's family history / lore of diabolical behavior - indeed a lot of Wednesday's dark jokes infer terrible things her family has done in the past - and one of the main story arcs where a member of their family is accused of murder. Without giving anything away, the character's reaction to the accusation seemed way out of character to me. You'd expect the Addam's family would sort of laugh it off, or be like "yup, that makes sense. Next." but instead it seems to conjure up feelings of mistrust and betrayal, which just seemed odd considering there are plenty of other jokes where the family is kinda like "oh yeah, our uncle is a cannibal" and then nonchalantly moves on.
This isn't a major criticism, and I'm still very much enjoying the show I just think it's weird that the whole family is a celebration of "the dark side" but then, in this one instance, they're like "oh no, that would be bad behavior". Lol, wut?
Murderville (2022)
Completely Original and Hilarious!!
I can't remember the last time I saw something that was ACTUALLY original, but Murderville is. This isn't a sitcom and it isn't a sketch-comedy: it's somewhere in the middle and the result is hilarious. While the over-the-top performances by the "scripted" cast are funny in a predictable way, bringing in a special celebrity guest each episode - who has no idea what's going on - makes for absolute comedy gold. For me, the best moments came when the guest was trying to play along, and then the cast throws an awkward/cringe curveball and gets them to unexpectedly break character and crack up. Watching famous actors try and keep a straight face while being asked to respond to the most ridiculous scenarios had me literally crying with laughter.
Arcane: League of Legends (2021)
Animated Sci-fi Action Masterpiece
I don't often watch animated media, I've never played LoL, and I almost never give a 10/10 but that's how good this is. From the art style, to the direction, to the action: this series hits on every level. Love the characters, the tension of the Two cities and the surrounding lore. Can't wait for more!
Radius (2017)
Convoluted but Interesting and Different
I really liked the idea for this movie and, for the most part and will typically score a movie a bit higher if it has an original plot - which this does - and, ultimately, I enjoyed watching the story unfold. There were a couple of big issues I had however:
1) The Amnesia element seemed just too convenient as a way to hide plot points. It worked to a degree, but as the back-story revealed itself there were a few "twists" that only worked because the character wasn't able to remember the past and the reactions to these reveals wasn't fully believable to me.
2) I really didn't like the main character for most of the movie and had a really hard time empathizing with him because he's such a jerk. I was actually going to mark this movie as a "6" because of that, but, in the end, when the plot is fully revealed, the fact that I didn't like him made more sense and I wound up moving my score up to a "7".
Bottom line: interesting idea that's relatively well executed, but cheap plot devices and an ending with mixed emotions makes this movies only "good" not "great".
The Stepfather (2009)
Completely Predictable and Nothing New
So I get this movie came out in 2009, but because it as the "You" guy, it's trending and I decided to watch it. It's not so much that this movie is "bad" it's just that it's so predictable. And by predictable, I literally mean the first scene of the movie tells us exactly who the bad guy is and what he does, with no ambiguity. The net result is that there there's no "what" left in the movie to uncover or explore, there is only "how" and that doesn't make for a very compelling movie.
Kate (2021)
Familiar Assassin / Revenge Movie, but Works!
Netflix is at it again with another algorithm driven "mashup". This movie pulls from: La Femme Nikita, Atomic Blonde, Kill Bill and Crank (among others), but, thanks to slick production and solid acting from Mary Elizabeth Winstead it WORKS MUCH BETTER than I expected. The high contrast, rain-slick neon streets of Osaka and Tokyo are on full display here and the pacing is fast, with just enough back-story to bring the characters to life in a way that was engaging. A couple things of note:
1) The action is more similar to Atomic Blonde in that our female anti-hero is up against an army of dudes, and, instead of some easy one-punch win (a-la Kill Bill) she employs all manner of environmental tools and favors speed over strength. While hyper action movies are always on the low-end of believable - the no-nonsense violence and savagery (and creativity) of the weapons / tools she uses seemed accurate for the character.
2) Mary Elizabeth Winstead nails it. From subtile facial expressions during character moments, to fast action fight-scenes, I bought her in the role. There was zero "cringe" in her approach to the character and I was totally won over.
Finally, a few others have complained that this is yet another "white person kills asians" movies. There's merit to that issue but I would argue that - especially towards the end - the context of western vs eastern (Japanese in this case) crime culture is brought specifically into the plot as topics of honor and loyalty are specifically discussed and contribute to the evolution of the plot in meaningful ways. Personally - as a white guy who spent 7 years in Japan and who speaks Japanese - I thought they did a great job of bringing this stereotype into the plot vs just having another "white action person takes on Asian crime-syndicate" movie...
The Tomorrow War (2021)
Familiar But Much Better Than Expected
This blends a lot of common sci-fi action tropes from Alien(s), Edge of Tomorrow, The Thing (even hell even Pitch Black) and delivers the blend in a high-gloss, big-production package. I was expecting another "just good enough for free" movie with a couple of alien shots but mostly cheap sets and closeups to save on production costs but no: in this movie they went big with lots and lots of creatures, some big sets and explosions. I was impressed. Sure there's a far-out premise and plenty of scenes where you think "yeah right..." but if you just sit back and enjoy the show it's a very fun ride.
The Suicide Squad (2021)
A Graphic Opportunity for DC
Basically this movie is what happens when some DC exec says "hey, let's make a MCU-style movie with a Deadpool sense of humor". The result: an over-the-top, graphic, slapstick, ensemble-cast bloodbath that's targeted for "adults" and hits home way more than it misses. (which isn't a surprise since it was The Guardians of the Galaxy's James Gunn directing from the beginning...)
But here's what's more interesting: this could be a formula DC uses to carve their new niche: one that blends the camp, pop and humor of Marvel movies, but also leans into the graphic violence that a lot of comic book fans (who are largely in the 18 - 34 crowd) will likely enjoy, but will never get from the combined Disney + MCU machine.
If DC keeps up this angle, they just might breathe new life into their Franchises.
Out of Death (2021)
Better Title: Out of Brains
This is a movie where everyone literally makes the wrong decision every step of the way . Also Bruce Willis is in it.
We Summon the Darkness (2019)
A Hot Mess
What's not to like about an 80s slasher with Alexandra Daddario? A lot, and that's unfortunate. All the right elements were there for a fun, horror-comedy but bad editing, acting and a failure of the director to lean into either the comedy element or the horror element turned this into a snore-fest instead of a gore-fest.
Army of the Dead (2021)
Oceans 11 meets I Am Legend
The only movies that like slow motion more than Zack Snyder are the ocean's 11 movies, so if you want slow motion, detailed "head shots" and zombie gore you're gonna love it. In fact The acting is solid, and the production value is top notch so theres a lot to like here, but the problem I have, and it's a big one, is that The characters who live and die aren't satisfying choices and there's no real redemption in the end so while beautiful to look at kind of wondering what was the point?
Mortal Kombat (2021)
Found just the right balance
Saw the movie and read the reviews. Look: you can have a Mortal Kombat that's serious or you can have a Mortal Kombat where people get cut in half with a hat. You can't have both and I think they made the right choice.
Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)
Entertaining But Forgettable
WW1984 is a fun movie with a lot of heart and a good moral compass, but falls into the same trap that Iron Man 2 and Thor Darkworld did, namely: failing to provide a solid reason why any of this matters.
To their credit, Gal Gadot, Kristen Wiig and Pedro Pascal all do a great job bringing their characters to life but, unfortunately, the director either lost confidence or patience as the style fades from "big, bold, 80s" to "diet 80s" by the end and there's nothing in the writing to justify this, or excuse it.
Polar (2019)
Action Assassin Soup with a Rock n Roll Vibe
If you took The Professional, Assassins, Taken, John Wick and Smokin' Aces and put them in a blender you'd get this movie. One thing that stands out here though is the the style: it's extreme in every way which I guess isn't a surprise sine the director has done a lot of music videos...
Time Freak (2018)
Mildly Interesting But With Terrible Morals
My wife and I decided to watch this as sort of a "Rom-com meets Sci-fi" and figured it would be enjoyable enough with the Enders Game guy and Game of Thrones girl. Nope... What we got was two thoroughly unlikeable characters in a morally-reprehensible story. + 2 stars because the concept is interesting at its core and the best-friend is funnny.
Black Box (2020)
Solid Psychological Sci-Fi
This is a pretty tight little movie: the writing, acting and direction are all solid and explore interesting ideas around the ethics of memory and identity. I think where it "misses" is in the attempts to bring in horror elements / visuals. It's not that they're bad necessarily, it's just that they seem more like a marketing attempt than something necessary to the plot and I think the movie would have been better without them.
The Undoing (2020)
Come For the Acting, Stay for the Acting...
This is a drama with mystery / thriller undertones and, while the acting is award-worthy - there's literally a scene that focuses on the eyeballs, and it works! - the story is too drawn out with red-herrings and an ending that ultimately feels flat. If they cut the fluff they could have made a tight little 2 hr movie that would have been a 9/10, instead you get more than you need, but less than you hoped for.
Girlhouse (2014)
A Near Perfect Slasher
Slashers are over-the-top movies about sex, parties (a little comedy) and lots and lots of gore. If you like those things: you'll love this movie. If you don't: you wont. Personally, I thought this was one of the best slashers I've seen in a long time.
I Spit on Your Grave (2010)
Intense, Brutal And So, So Satisfying in the End
I watch a LOT of horror, but I tend to avoid anything with graphic depictions of torture or rape, so I avoided this movie for a long time. My mistake. WOW. WOW, WOW WOW.
To be clear this movie IS NOT for casual horror fans - it deals with some pretty dark stuff and even I found myself unable to watch a couple moments - but, interestingly, it was less intense in the ways that I was fearing, and more intense in ways I didn't expect. I absolutely loved it and think that Sarah Butler deserves an Oscar for her performance.
The Swing of Things (2020)
So Bad It's Almost Worth Studying
It's almost as if the writers and director took anything that would make sense in the movie, threw it out, stitched the rest of the extra scenes together and called it a "movie". +1 star cuz Olivia Culpo is hot.
Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee: Happy Thanksgiving, Miranda (2014)
Painful to Watch, but that's the Point
It was weird that the show switched up the format. Normally it's Jerry and a comedian (in this case, Colleen Ballinger), this time it's Jerry and a character, "Miranda Sings". Whatever the producers saw on YouTube that made them think this character would work on the show: they were wrong, she's just annoying. Painfully annoying. I "get" that that's the point, but it just didn't work and I felt bad for everyone involved with this episode.
If you "hate" Miranda Sings, at least watch the post-credit scene where you get to see a bit of the actress/comedian who plays her, there's some redemption after all.