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GrayedMan
Reviews
Das Signal (2024)
It needs a hero, and so do I
I made it until 10 - 11 minutes into the second episode. Then I couldn't take it anymore. The writing is terrible. Truly, this was written by people who are not only confused, but downright wrong. Their idiocy and misinformation is transposed onto the central character, Sven. I have a hard enough time suffering through poor writing to begin with. But couple that bad writing with unlikable characters, and forget it. Sven is not likable. I can't stay with a movie when I hate the hero. Sven is not only stupid, he's also a jerk. If the writers had bothered to fact check, read, learn, or think, rather than being smug and wrong, this might not have been such an embarrassment for them.
The Bear: Forks (2023)
Exquisite.
This episode is a portrait all its own. Episode S2 E7 "Forks" is a journey. I went into it not fully appreciating the character of Richie, and not really understanding the draw of the restaurant field. I came away with passion for both. The lesson builds through each second as he polishes, works, listens, and serves. Every second counts. I am surprised, moved, and impressed. There is a gift in making people happy. Within this gift there is a self-fulfilling state of being. I've never thought about it before, and I never would have considered the restaurant business as such a powerful teacher. We witness Richie becoming more, and healing.
Ebon Moss-Bachrach is sheer genius. I'm blown away.
Halloween Ends (2022)
Here's why this doesn't work.
According to the first 2 films of this trilogy(which I liked), Laurie Strode lives in defense-mode, with guns and mad-skills in an enforced safe house. Even with all that she's done, she still winds up losing her daughter, son in law, and friends. All she has left is her granddaughter, but instead of doing all she can to protect her, in this film she's just "living". Lindsey has really bad bangs, why? Because she had them as a child? A completely different actor that looks nothing like the child played Tommy was cast as adult Tommy but Lindsey needs to have her childhood bangs? The whole town united against Michael Myers in the last film, finally seeing the truth and proving Laurie right. They all saw first hand what supernatural psychokiller Michael Myers can do, but just 4 years later everyone has forgotten. They mock and have turned on Laurie, they even blame her? This makes no sense. Laurie has had some kind of psychic connection to Michael Myers all this time, yet now he's living under a bridge in the sewer or something underground just blocks from her home and she has no idea? Michael Myers is a well established super-natural unstoppable force but now has aged like a man, has stopped stalking and hunting and just stays underground, waiting for opportunity kills? We never find out if he killed the kid Corey was babysitting. We think yes he did, with the knife disappearing, the door left open, etc. But if he did, that makes even less sense. He came out and killed once, then just disappeared into the sewer? The father of the kid says he thinks Corey was a good kid who didn't kill his son, but looks at him years later for a few seconds and says he could tell Corey was not the same person by his eyes. Really? Again Laurie talks about Michael's eyes, and the connection, but still has no idea. At this point though so much of this movie contradicts what's been established in the last two movies, that we just accept nothing makes sense. And that "teach me" stuff from Corey? Teach him what, how to shove a knife into someone? Now Michael Myers comes out of retirement finally and kills at the doctor's house. Corey purposefully smacks his bloody hand on the glass. Why? To leave DNA?
Halloween movies are about Michael Myers. This isn't a movie about Michael Myers. It's about Corey, and his screwed up mother, and his poor father, and the girl with baggage he likes, and the pack of bullies that chase him, and the psycho in the sewer he connects to.
Rohan Campbell is an intense and gifted actor. No disrespect intended. But we don't want a movie about Corey in the Halloween universe. We just want Michael Myers. And, he can't die.
Chelsea Handler: Revolution (2022)
One Moon in our Solar System?
She actually winds up a bit about how stupid she is with a punchline beginning with: "There is one moon in the whole solar system". So not only did she not know the sun and the moon aren't the same thing, she also doesn't know what a solar system is, and doesn't even realize it. There is an estimated 200 moons in our solar system. There are 79 moons on Jupiter alone. Little children can tell you that. Is she really too stupid to tell a joke about how stupid she is? I'm not giving any spoilers away, it's the end of the bit netflix lets you hear from the thumbnail clip. This is worse than her asking Noel Fielding if he'd ever heard of Nicaragua. I don't know how she can be that challenged and have the nerve to call certain politicians stupid. I got as far as the jokes about abandoning her dog, which is true. It isn't funny, obviously.
Tunnelen (2019)
i shut it off when family leaves pet in fire
There was no reason for it, it did not enhance the movie, it's just sick and stupid. Why does there always have to be animal cruelty like this? The family gets out of the car and runs and just leaves their pet to die in the fire, no reason they couldn't have carried it, it was a wee hamster in a wee cage. I can't stand the animal deaths in movies, and I won't watch them, and I will always rate them a "1". I'm sure lots of people will give this review a thumbs down. But people with souls won't, and maybe my reviews will prevent some people from having terrible images like this burned into their brains.
La nuée (2020)
Horrible dog murder
The protagonist is not a likable character. It is hard to stay with a movie when you are rooting against the lead character. Then 3/4 of the way through she brutally murders a dog. It isn't the first animal death by the way. I shut it off at that point.
The King of Staten Island (2020)
Pete Davidson
Pete Davidson is so genuine. He's the real thing. He is one of us, and like the rest of us he's vunerable, and flawed. And beautiful because he's completely open about it. This kind of bravery is exemplary. We can all learn something from Pete.
1BR (2019)
Animal Cruelty
Cat in oven. I shut it off at that point. They warn you about cursing and nudity, but not about serious images of animal cruelty.
The Cleaning Lady (2018)
Animal Cruelty
Opening scene is mice in a blender. I didn't make it past the first 45 seconds.
Christian Mingle (2014)
Surprisingly nice
I watch a lot of PureFlix, where I saw this film. Compared to other PureFlix movies, this is one of the better ones. I think Lacy had a difficult role on her hands. It's not the first movie about a non-believer that finds her way over the course of the movie. But this one was extra-involved with a lot of human elements that get in the way for her. The tough part about a role like that is keeping the audience rooting for you as you make mistakes. I think Lacy did a fine job, keeping the audience on her side the whole time. Well done.
Finding Normal (2013)
Candace is lovely
This is one of the better PureFlix movies. The acting is good, the sets are good, there is an actual story with a plot, and a few little turns to it. It's a real feel-good, lovely, inspirational story. Candace Bure is a talented actress.
I Am Not Okay with This (2020)
Animal death warning.
I watched until she killed the hedgehog. It was accidental, but at the little funeral she says the hedgehog "didn't do ". So now I hate her. It's that simple. When will studios learn to stop murdering pets? I was mildly interested in the show before that, and hoping she'd be ok. After that, I thought about nothing but that poor little hedgehog, and not hoping she winds up ok. NO this isn't a spoiler. It's an animal death warning.
Hemlock Grove (2013)
Depictions of Animal Cruelty
I made it to season 2 episode 3, up to the scene where the wolf is graphically beheaded. Then I shut it off for good. Through out what I saw, there was a horrible scene with a ferret being scientifically tested on, rats being eaten or crawling and crying in pain, taxidermy happening to a bunny, birds being hexed and plummeting into the sea, wolves crying and shot, but absolutely the worst was Peter who is supposed to be a hero here, killing his cat with his bare hands for a witchcraft spell whatever, and even says to it "you trusted me" before murdering it. I was never hooked to begin with, but once the guy I'm supposed to be rooting for kills his pet cat, I had no emotional connection to the show. I kept thinking this has to turn around, and giving it another episode, until I just couldn't take it anymore. None of the animal violence is germane to the storyline. I'm insulted by the show makers, thinking that we will just accept pets being murdered for spells. I gave it a fair chance, and have concluded that I'll won't watch anything any of these people are involved with again.
The Edict (2017)
nauseating sound effect
The horrible ear piercing sound effect is too much. I had to shut this off, it was making me sick.
H8RZ (2015)
Cast List Gives It Away
I got only about 5 minutes into Haters (H8RZ) when I couldn't concentrate on the story seeing how Alex, who seemed to be a male character, was so effeminate. Clearly a female actress was playing this role. So I looked here on this site at the cast and this is what I found -
Eliza Bennett ... Brittany Tammand / Alex Thomas
So, a few minutes later into the movie when a dead chick named Brittany is blackmailing the little crew of 5 students including Alex... I already knew who it was.
There is more going on which kept me watching including a thieving principal and a crazy manipulating teacher both played by A-List actors. But it is pretty silly that anyone who happens to look to see what actors are in this movie prior to watching it will unintentionally learn the big twist ending.
One of the things Haters (H8RZ) has in common with The Usual Suspects is that the film timeline takes place after the fact. In Usual Suspects it's already all over, and Kevin Spacey is sitting in the police station as one character, telling his version of what happened to the cop, hiding the fact that he's the other character they're looking for. In H8RZ the timeline also takes place after the fact. "Alex" is sitting in the school with the lawyer for the school board telling his version of what happened, hiding the fact that he's secretly "Brittany". The endings are the same too, with that main character just pulling away in time as the cop/school lawyer runs out to the street to get them but just misses them, and the audience is shown some flashed scenes of what really happened.
By the way, kudos to the cast list for The Usual Suspects which does NOT list actor Kevin Spacey's secret identity character. That cast list doesn't contain the big spoiler the way H8RZ's does.
Psychos (2017)
Gruesome Animal Cruetly
Truly barbaric disgusting animal cruelty. I will never watch anything Sandy Chukhadarian ever does again.
Jack Goes Home (2016)
Brutal dog death
Small cute dog brutally murdered and then graphically shown being carried around. Forget the fact that the ending doesn't work, or the plot holes, or all the unresolved questions. Killing the dog did nothing to further the plot, or explain anything. There was no reason for it. That speaks volumes about the writer and director.
Kevin Hart: Irresponsible (2019)
Great Baby
I've watched this several times now and I still keep laughing. The great baby story is delivered with such finesse! I loved this special.
Kevin Hart: I'm a Grown Little Man (2009)
Take a Lesson
Kevin Hart is a master storyteller. I've enjoyed almost all of his stand up routines but this one remains my favorite. I wish all comedians would take a lesson from Mr. Hart. He never preaches or berates. He doesn't talk about politics which will inevitably only lead to alienating at least half the audience. He's just all about the funny. He's hilarious, and you never forget that fact by having to wade through mean rants or speeches. From the man-pigeon to his family, Mr. Hart delivers laugh after laugh with so much sincerity.
I, Daniel Blake (2016)
Hard to watch
Many reviews have already covered what this film is about, and have presented facts and opinions regarding the system, so I won't repeat all that. Instead, I just want to say that this was a very hard film to watch. It is a difficult emotional journey, watching Katie and Dan as they both try to hold on to their dignity. They are both hard working lovely people with good hearts, just trying to find work and in Katie's case, feed a family. It made me sick in my soul to see how they are treated in so many places, how unbending the system is. And then, the people that do help like the shop owner, the sneaker neighbor and the kind people in the food bank, they nourish your soul back again. It's just hard. The embarrassment and humility. I don't think this is the average person in the system in the UK, but I think even if it's only 10% of the people, it's far too many. I know this film isn't for everybody. It's difficult subject matter presented in a linear way. The acting is incredible. Some of the most brilliant delivery, of the most heart wrenching common-man dialogue. The scenes/sets, direction, script - it's all bloody brilliant in the most relatable accessible of ways. This is a champion job for the every man.
Whitechapel (2009)
Powerful final episode
This is a grand cast of top-notch actors, paired with brilliant writing, sensitive direction, and perfect period sets. So much about this series delivers. It's not just another spin on Jack the Ripper, and it's not just another detective show. It shares elements of the other worldly, paranormal, haunting and spell binding, but not so much that they become the stories. These stories are much more than that, involving the lives of these characters. Their loves, their mistakes, misfortunes, and beliefs. They are tested, and taken on this journey with culminates in the final series, exploding in the final episode. SO MUCH MORE should have been said after. It is a shame there wasn't another series to explore what they now finally know.
Luther (2010)
Animal Violence
Spoilers. First episode shows a dog who has been shot several times in the face by the woman that owns him, blowing his head apart so she can hide a gun in his body. By the end of the second episode, Luther is having coffee with this deplorable woman. Luther is unlikable and the woman is vile. Match made in heaven. But I'm not watching. I can't watch a show where there is no one to root for. Disgusting animal violence.
The Ice Cream Truck (2017)
Fiction in the making
The review titled: "Spoilers ahead" written by SteverB is spot on. the reason the movie feels off is because it isn't meant to be a polished completed movie, it's supposed to be the novel-in-process that the main character is writing. And yes, it makes perfect sense that the possible sequel the film makers mentioned - The Delivery Man, or The Delivery Truck - would come because there was one real, nicely flowing, creepy thing that was actually happening, and that was the furniture delivery guy. She was so busy concocting her fictitious book that she ignored the scary delivery guy, whom we are reminded of at the end as he watches the house. Sequel could be the real horror going on while she is busy in her head with a story, or, it could be her making up another story around this inspiring character. Who knows. In any case, I thought this was different, and interesting, and I'd watch a sequel.
I had to take away a star for the casting of the high school graduating love interest. He was oddly made up, and looked older than her. Even as a non-fleshed out fictional character in her head, he is in the neighborhood, even saying hi to her and her family at the end, therefore he really needed to be believable, which he wasn't. The actor is fine, it's just a bad casting/make up/wardrobe thing.
Post Human: An Event (2017)
Unbearable score and sound
Shrill noise scores almost the whole movie making it impossible to endure. The dialogue is repetitious and all over the place. I have no idea what the sound engineers were trying to do. Voices are disconnected from their bodies. The entire thing sounds like it was recorded in looping, whispered over microphones and then dubbed in to make every moment seem fake. All of the technicals are over-staged and... bad. This is just a bad film. Literally nothing happens. It's just people talking badly recorded and edited to look made up.
Emelie (2015)
Animal cruelty
Be warned, animal cruelty, and it is not relevant to the story, nor does it add anything. The story isn't good to begin with, and the fact that the filmmaker chose to include the pet murder says a lot.