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Hellraiser (2022)
Hellraiser
The original 1987 film, based on the book by Clive Barker, is a classic; Doug Bradley played Pinhead in seven further sequels with mixed to negative results, Stephan Smith Collins failed to take over the role in Revelations, as did Paul T. Taylor in Judgment. Barker (who directed the original) returned for this reboot, the eleventh entry in the overall franchise, and with a new take, while staying faithful to the sadomasochistic tone, directed by David Bruckner (V/H/S, The Ritual). Basically, hedonistic millionaire investor, art collector and socialite Roland Voight (Goran Visnjic) is hosting a lavish orgy at his mansion. During the evening, he forces homeless sex worker Joseph "Joey" Coscuna (Kit Clarke) to solve a mysterious mechanical puzzle box. Solving it, it springs a blade that cuts Joey's hand, and a portal to another dimension is opened. Joey is killed by several chains flying out, hooks piercing his skin, and he is ripped apart. Six years later, recovering drug addict Riley McKendry (Odessa A'zion) lives with her estranged brother Matt (Brandon Flynn), his boyfriend Colin (Adam Faison), and their roommate Nora (Aoife Hinds). Riley and her boyfriend Trevor (Drew Starkey) find the puzzle box in an abandoned storage warehouse. Returning home late, Matt accuses Riley of relapsing, and they argue. At an empty park, Riley solves the puzzle box but avoids being cut by the blade. The Cenobites, a group of mutilated humanoids, appear and demand another sacrifice. Matt, feeling guilty about their strained relationship, finds Riley incapacitated and inadvertently cuts himself on the box while trying to wake her up. He goes to a nearby restroom to clean his wound but then experiences a headache. Outside, Riley notices the box changing shapes before she hears Matt screaming and finds he is missing after entering the bathroom. Believing the box caused Matt's disappearance, Riley and Trevor track down Voight's former lawyer Serena Menaker (Hiam Abbass) at an assisted living facility. Having concealed it in the warehouse, Menaker tries to confiscate the box from Riley but is cut by its blade and she is abducted by the Cenobites. Visiting Voight's abandoned mansion, Riley discovers from his journals that the configurations require six victims to be marked for sacrifice by its blade. On completion, the holder receives a "gift" from Leviathan, the entity that rules over Hell. Riley sees an apparition of Matt and is horrified to see he has been flayed (stripped of his skin). Colin, Trevor and Nora arrive in Trevor's van to take Riley home. While Riley explains what she witnessed to Colin, Nora activates a switch in the bar that opens a secret passage. Trevor inadvertently shuts the door, trapping her inside the passage, and as he tries to rescue her, the mutilated Voight, hiding behind the walls, stabs her with the box. The group escapes the mansion and tries to get help, but Nora is abducted by the Cenobites. Nora is taunted, tortured, and fatally skinned in a decrepit hallway by the Cenobite leader, the Priest aka Pinhead (Jamie Clayton). Whilst in the van, Riley sees a reflection of Nora's torture in the rearview mirror, causing them to crash. Leaving the van, the Priest appears and offers Riley to exchange Matt for two sacrifices. She refuses the offer but is ordered to sacrifice either two people or herself. Another Cenobite, the Chatterer (Jason Liles), injures Trevor, but Riley solves the next configuration and uses the box blade to stab the Chatterer, who is ripped apart as the next sacrifice. The trio retreats to the mansion, realising the steel doors can stop the Cenobites from entering. Leaving Trevor to rest, Riley and Colin plan to trap the Asphyx (Zachary Hing), another Cenobite, as the last sacrifice, but she drops the box. Voight appears, picks it up, and stabs Colin, revealing that he sought "sensation" after completing all his sacrifices. Instead, a contraption attached to Voight's back randomly twists his nerve endings. Voight completes the final configuration and the Cenobites are trapped; he is trying to ask Leviathan to free him. While Leviathan appears above the mansion, Riley retrieves the box, unlocks the steel doors, and rescues Colin from torture by stabbing Trevor, who becomes the final sacrifice. Meanwhile, the Priest warns Voight that his reward can only be exchanged and not revoked. Voight accepts her offer of "power" and is released from his contraption and heals, but Leviathan immediately impales him with a large chain and drags him away. With the sacrifices completed, the Cenobites offer to resurrect Matt. Riley declines, realising their gifts will bring pain, and decides to accept Matt's death. After the Cenobites praise her for choosing the Lament Configuration, feeling regret with brief suffering, they vanish, and the box returns to its original form. As the duo leaves the mansion, Colin talks to Riley about her choice. Meanwhile, inside Leviathan's realm, Voight is brutally transformed into a new Cenobite. Also starring Yinka Olorunnife as the Weeper, Selina Lo as the Gasp, Gorica Regodic as the Mother, and Vukasin Jovanovic as the Masque. Clayton as a female version of Pinhead is relatively interesting, A'zion lacks commitment as the lead, and Visnjic could have been on longer. The Cenobites changed to female characters (most of them) only sort of works, the gore, torture and violence are not imaginative, and it should be scarier, I would just stick to the original, this is it is just another dull and pointless horror. Adequate!
Hellraiser: Judgment (2018)
Hellraiser: Judgment
Doug Bradley refused to appear in the previous entry because of its rushed production, Stephan Smith Collins failed to make an impression as Pinhead, so for the next sequel they once again replaced the actor playing the iconic villain, but I had low expectations. Basically, in a parallel dimension resembling Hell, Cenobite leader Pinhead (Paul T. Taylor) and the Auditor (Gary J. Tunnicliffe, also writing and directing) of the Stygian Inquisition are discussing how to adapt their methods of harvesting souls. Advancing human technology is making the Configurations, the gateways to hell, obsolete. Local criminal Karl Watkins (Jeff Fenter) is seen in the realm being punished for his sins; three topless women with skinless faces (Andi Leah Powers, Mary Kathryn Bryant, and Valerie Sharp) are the Jury, seen making judgments from consuming the victim's bodily fluids (saliva and fat I think). Following the judgment, Watkins is sliced up by a figure wearing a gas mask. Meanwhile, on Earth, detective brothers the Carters, Sean (Damon Carney) and David (Randy Wayne), and detective Christine Egerton (Alexandra Harris) are investigating a series of murders. The murders of the serial killer known as the Preceptor are based on the Ten Commandments. A connection with one of the victims leads the detectives to Watkins (Jeff Fenter), who went missing near an abandoned house. Sean goes to the house and loses consciousness, waking up in the Stygian Inquisition's domain in hell. The Inquisition prepares to hand down a verdict on Sean, but the Assessor (John Gulager) who eats a document about his sins chokes and vomits blood, and the three topless women react violently also. Then the angel Jophiel (Helena Grace Donald) intervenes and tells them to release him. Sean escapes the realm with a stolen puzzle box, and the Auditor requests Pinhead's guidance. Sean and his brother return to search the house, finding no trace of hell or the Inquisition. That night, Sean is haunted by visions of the Cenobites and the inhabitants of hell, who promise "judgment and redemption" to anyone who opens the box. Sean and Christine go to the coroner's office and find that one of the Preceptor's victims has a cell phone with their body, recording her final location with its GPS. They find the Preceptor's hideout, where Sean incapacitates Christine and reveals himself as the killer. David deduces that his brother is the Preceptor and meets with the coroner to find the building. Upon arrival, Sean disarms David and reveals that he has his wife Alison (Rheagan Wallace) as a hostage and that she has been having an affair. At gunpoint, he forces David and Alison to solve the box, opening a gateway to the other dimension. Sean tries to offer Alison and David to take his place as souls to be collected. Pinhead tells him they will be dealt with for opening the box, but a separate faction of hell wants his soul, and there will be no deal. The Auditor appears, telling Sean the Inquisition has found him guilty of his sins. Jophiel intervenes again and protests to Pinhead and the Auditor that Sean must remain on Earth to instil fear into sinners according to Heaven's plan. Pinhead arranges for Christine to kill Sean, and spitefully dispatches Jophiel. As punishment, Pinhead is expelled from hell by God who forces him to walk the earth as a mortal man. In a post-credits scene, in Germany, a group of Mormon missionaries approach a house, and The Auditor answers and invites them in. Also starring A Nightmare on Elm Street's Heather Langenkamp as the Landlady, Mike Jay Regan as the Chatterer, and Grace Montie as Crystal Lanning. Taylor again is no substitute for Bradley as the lead villain, Tunnicliffe as a new antagonist is only okay, and the other cast members are hardly worth mentioning. There is almost no plot, and I didn't get the police procedural stuff, it is just another excuse to see people being tortured and killed, only some gory moments got my attention, but it is just another dull and pointless horror. Pretty poor!
Hellraiser: Revelations (2011)
Hellraiser: Revelations
Doug Bradley played the iconic Pinhead for eight films, but he refused to return for this ninth entry in the franchise because of its rushed production (shot in two weeks); although I had a feeling it would be terrible, I was intrigued to see a new actor playing the character. Basically, the Mexican authorities have returned the belongings of friends Nico Bradley (Jay Gillespie) and Steven Craven (Nick Eversman) who ran away from home to their parents. Among their belongings is a video recording of the pair who filmed themselves engaging in several days' worth of partying and finding a mystical puzzle box. This footage is their final documented moments before they disappeared. A year later, the families of the two missing boys have gathered for dinner. Tensions rise when Steven's sister and Nico's girlfriend, Emma (Tracey Fairaway), expresses frustration that things have not been resolved. She demands that her mother Sarah (Devon Sorvari), who has been obsessively watching it in private, should show them the contents of Steven's videotape. Later, Emma looks at the tape, which shows Steven and Nico meeting a girl, a Mexican prostitute, in a bar. A flashback reveals that Nico had sex with the girl in the bar's restroom before murdering her for an unknown reason. Nico threatened to implicate Steven in the killing to force him to continue their "vacation" together. Nico later receives the puzzle box from a Vagrant (Dan Buran), offering it to experience a new kind of sensual pleasure. Looking through Steven's belongings, Emma finds and recognises the puzzle box from the video. When she tries to manipulate it, Steven suddenly reappears covered in blood. The families try to get Steven to a hospital, but they become stranded; Steven warns that the "Cenobites" are coming. Emma fiddles with the puzzle box again, causing intense sexual arousal. Emma tries to seduce Nico's father, Peter (Sebastien Roberts) and then has a deeply intimate conversation with Steven in his room and they kiss. But as Steven caresses her, Emma has a vision of chains and mutilated bodies. Soon after, Peter is killed by the same vagrant. Steven then goes downstairs, grabs a shotgun, and shoots his father before holding the others in the house at gunpoint. Another flashback reveals that Nico solved the puzzle box, opening a portal to the realm of the Cenobites: extra-dimensional sadomasochists led by Pinhead (Stephan Smith Collins, voiced by Fred Tatasciore). Steven flees, but Nico is taken by the Cenobites to be subjected to extreme torture and mutilation. Later, while having rough sex with a prostitute, Nico communicates with Steven through the puzzle box and convinces him to kill the prostitute to allow him to escape from hell, emerging skinless and emaciated. Steven later kills several more prostitutes, using their blood to regenerate Nico, but he is unable to regrow his skin. When Steven finally hesitates to help him, Nico kills Steven and takes his skin. In his dying moments, Steven uses the puzzle box to contact the Cenobites and become one of them to get revenge. The "Steven" holding the families hostage is actually Nico wearing Steven's skin and taunting them. He reveals that a reason he and Steven ran away from home was because they discovered Steven's father Ross (Steven Brand) and Nico's mother were having an adulterous affair with each other. He demands that Emma solve the puzzle box, wanting the Cenobites to take her in his place, thus preserving his freedom. Emma opens the portal and summons the Cenobites, including Steven, who kill Nico's mother for speaking out of turn. Nico tries to bargain for his life with Emma's, and while Pinhead knows that Emma has a dark sexual desire that he admires, he refuses and chooses to reclaim Nico for further experiments. As Nico is taken away, Emma's father shoots and kills him in a dying act of revenge. Displeased at having lost a victim, the Cenobites take Emma's mother as Nico's replacement. Her father apologises and then dies in Emma's arms. Left alone, Emma reaches for the puzzle box. Also starring Sanny van Heteren as Kate Bradley, Jolene Andersen as the Female Cenobite, Camelia Dee as the Street Walker, and Sue Ann Pien as Pseudo the Hooker. The plot is limited because it mainly takes place in one room, with only fleeting scenes of other locations, the cast is wasted with a stupid script full of cliched dialogue, and Collins is no substitute for Bradley, only the tiniest moments of gore and torture got my attention, but otherwise it is a rubbish, boring and pointless horror. Pretty poor!
The Snowman and the Snowdog (2012)
The Snowman and the Snowdog
The Snowman, based on the children's book by Raymond Briggs, is one of the most popular repeating cartoons on Channel 4. To mark the 30th anniversary of the channel and the original animation, this sequel was released. Basically, a little boy and his mother have moved into their new home, the same home as the boy from the original film. Over time, their dog has grown old and eventually it passes away, which upsets the boy. On a snowy day, the boy finds a hidden hat and scarf beneath the floorboards, along with a photo of the original boy and his built snowman. He decides to use the snow to build the same snowman from the picture, along with a snowdog with ears made from socks. That night, the boy is surprised when the Snowman comes to life, along with the Snowdog. The Snowman and Snowdog take the boy, flying into the air, to the North Pole. There they encounter other snowpeople and animals who live in the cold, and they all compete in a skiing race. Before leaving, Father Christmas gives the Snowman a dog collar. After returning home, the boy is sad saying goodbye to his new friends. The Snowman gives the boy the dog collar to place around the Snowdog's neck. This magically transforms the Snowdog into a real dog, "Socks", which makes the boy really happy. It ends sadly when, the following morning, the boy and his new dog Socks go outside and find the Snowman has dissolved. The animation has the same quality as the original 1982 film, the story is predictable but nice, especially the transformation scene at the end, and the new sond, "Light the Night" by Andy Burrows (from Razorlight) is lright, all in all, it is a worthwhile animated Christmas fantasy short. Very good!
Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip (2015)
Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip
The original movie was annoying, The Squeakquel was only slightly less annoying, and the third Chipwrecked returned to being annoying, I wanted to finish the franchise, but I was sure it was going to be the same result, directed by Walt Becker (Van Wilder: Party Liaison, Wild Hogs). Basically, the Chipmunks - Alvin (Justin Long), Simon (Matthew Gray Gubler), and Theodore (Jesse McCartney), along with the Chipettes - Brittany (Christina Applegate), Jeanette (Anna Faris), and Eleanor (Razzie winning Kaley Cuoco, also for The Wedding Singer), have moved to a new house with their guardian David 'Dave' Seville (Razzie nominated Jason Lee). The Chipmunks set up a surprise birthday party that also serves as a good luck party for the Chipettes who are scheduled to be guest judges on American Idol. But Simon is dismayed when Alvin invites many guests and hires celebrity entertainment, including LMFAO star Redfoo (as himself). Dave is dissatisfied after returning home but agrees to take them mini golfing. There, the Chipmunks meet Samantha (Kimberly Williams-Paisley), who Dave has been dating for a few months. The Chipmunks are welcoming towards Samantha, but her son Miles (Josh Green) physically torments the trio. Later, the Chipmunks find an engagement ring in Dave's shopping bag and assume that he is going to propose to Samantha. Horrified that Dave and Samantha getting married would make Miles their stepbrother, they unsuccessfully try to steal the ring. While the Chipmunks' singing career is on hiatus, Dave is producing a record for rising pop artist Ashley Grey (Bella Thorne) in Miami. Dave brings Samantha along with him, while the Chipmunks and Miles stay together, and neighbour Ms. Price (Jennifer Coolidge) agrees to peek in on them. The Chipmunks tell Miles about the engagement ring, and he agrees to join them travelling to Miami to sabotage the supposed marriage proposal. The Chipmunks drug three squirrels and dress them up in their clothes from stuffed toys to fool Ms. Price. They travel on a plane, but Theodore lets out a monkey and several other animals from storage on the flight, leading to an emergency landing in Austin, Texas. They encounter frustrated unscrupulous Air Marshal James Suggs (Tony Hale) who hates the Chipmunks because her girlfriend dumped him at Christmas for being their biggest fan at the time and blowing his chance to become an FBI agent. The Chipmunks are put on the No-Fly List by Suggs as revenge. On the journey, the Chipmunks perform at a bar after the original act has not turned up. They are caught by Suggs, so Alvin starts a bar fight so they can escape. They get into a cab, but the driver (Mark Jeffrey Miller) ejects them for not having money. They spend the night under an old tree, where Miles reveals that his father left him when he was young, causing the four to bond and see each other differently. They raise money busking to take a bus to New Orleans and perform at a Mardi Gras parade. Dave spots the Chipmunks when the parade gets broadcast on live television. Suggs tries to catch the Chipmunks during the parade, but he gets drunk on moonshine. Dave and Samantha find Miles and the Chipmunks at Louis Armstrong New Orleans International Airport and punish them for sneaking out and not responding to their many calls and texts. With the Chipmunks now on the No-Fly List, Dave must drive them. When they arrive in Miami, Alvin reveals that he stole the ring from the box, thus sabotaging a proposal. However, since Miles has grown to like the Chipmunks during their trip, he is upset that they are celebrating over this. Miles is crossing the road wearing headphones, and the Chipmunks save him when he is nearly hit by a car. After saving his life, Miles makes amends with the Chipmunks, and they agree to give the ring back. During the dinner, Suggs catches up with the Chipmunks, but they trap him in an elevator. Miles and the Chipmunks return the ring to Dave, saying they accept Samantha and Miles into the family. But Dave reveals the ring was meant for his friend Barry (My Name Is Earl's Eddie Steeples), who was proposing to his girlfriend, Alice (Maxie McClintock). The proposal is ruined, and Dave berates the Chipmunks. As one final apology, they perform a new song for Dave at the launch party with the help of the Chipettes, Ashley and Miles. Also, the ring is returned to Barry, he proposes again, and she accepts. After forgiving them, Dave officially adopts the Chipmunks as his sons. But returning home, he is angered once again finding the squirrels have destroyed the house. Meanwhile, Suggs is freed from the elevator and tries to relax by the pool, only for security guards to carry him out as he is not a hotel guest. Also starring Uzo Aduba as TSA Officer, John Waters as John the First-Class Passenger, and Laura Marano as the Hotel Babysitter. The animated animals are relatively cute and funny in moments, Lee is alright, Green is likeable enough, and Hale laps up being the panto villain. The soundtrack of songs is mixed, including "Baby Got Back", "Uptown Funk", and "Total Eclipse of the Heart", but the squeaky voices become irritating, it is full of immature behaviour and predictable jokes, only the young viewers may find it entertaining, I hope this is the last we've seen of the tiresome furballs, it is a silly live-action/animated jukebox musical adventure comedy. It was nominated the Razzie for Worst Remake, Rip-Off or Sequel. Adequate!
The Wild Robot (2024)
The Wild Robot
I liked the look of this film from the one or two trailers I had seen, it struck me as the kind of thing that may receive nominations during Awards Season as well, so I went to see it on the big screen, directed by Chris Sanders (Lilo & Stitch, How to Train Your Dragon, The Call of the Wild). Basically, during a storm, a Universal Dynamics cargo ship loses six all-purpose ROZZUM robots wash up on an island uninhabited by humans. Only one of the robots survives the crash and is accidentally activated by the local wildlife. ROZZUM Unit 7134, or "Roz" (Lupita Nyong'o), tries to advertise her services to the animals but only succeeds in terrifying them and injuring herself. Even after spending several days learning and translating the languages of the animals, she still cannot find anyone who needs help to give her a purpose to function. She decides to signal her manufacturers to retrieve her but gets chased by grizzly bear Thorn (Mark Hamill). While fleeing, she accidentally crushes a goose nest, killing the mother and leaving only one egg remaining. A hungry red fox named Fink (Pedro Pascal) tries to eat the egg, but Roz defends it. The egg hatches, the runt gosling imprints itself onto her, believing she is his mother, and he damages her transponder, meaning she cannot signal to return to her factory. A mother opossum Pinktail (Catherine O'Hara), who has many children obsessed with death, instructs Roz to feed the gosling, teach it to swim and ensure it can fly before the winter migration. Fink realises he can benefit from Roz to gain food supplies and he helps her construct a shelter. Fink helps Roz to name the gosling Brightbill (Boone Storm) and the three begin cohabiting. Several months later, Brightbill (Kit Connor) has grown and learns to swim from Roz and Fink teaching him. Brightbill tries to bond with the island's other geese, who mock him for his size and his relationship with the "monster" that killed his family. Angry at learning the truth and having it kept from him, Brightbill scorns and disowns Roz and leaves. Roz returns to the crash site to learn more about her purpose. Activating another ROZZUM unit, she learns about her original purpose and replaces her transponder. She decides not to give up on Brightbill; she gains the help of the peregrine falcon Thunderbolt (Ving Rhames) to teach Brightbill to fly. Returning to the goose flock, she meets their elderly leader Longneck (Bill Nighy) who gives her advice. Brightbill masters flying just as the geese prepare to migrate, and he departs with them. Distraught at Brightbill's absence and with no purpose, Roz reactivates her transponder to signal for a transporter to return her to the factory. Although she chooses to shut off the signal, it does reach Universal Dynamics headquarters. The geese are forced to shelter during a thunderstorm. They enter a greenhouse at Universal Dynamics headquarters, where RECO (Remote Command and Control) robots are hostile and attack them. Longneck orders Brightbill, the only goose not scared of the robots, to lead the flock to safety. Longneck sacrifices himself, getting shot by a robot's laser and saving Brightbill. Roz almost shuts down before a severe snowstorm stops her after she finds Fink hiding in their shelter. She rescues many animals from the snow, causing her battery levels to drop. Before Roz powers down, she and Fink urge the prey and predators to stop fighting with each other until spring. Thorn agrees to the truce, and the others comply. Roz reawakens months later to find the animals have kept their peace with each other, and the geese return, hailing Brightbill as a hero. A Universal Dynamics dropship crewed by retrieval robot Vontra (Stephanie Hsu) arrives to recover Roz. She initially complies but gets off after hearing from Fink that Brightbill is looking for her. Vontra sends an army of RECOs after Roz, but she and the animals band together to fend them off. Vontra detonates the destroyed RECOs, allowing her to capture Roz, and causing a forest fire. Brightbill leads the geese to attack the drop ship while the other animals extinguish the fire, but he finds that Vontra has already cut Roz's power and wiped her memories. However, Roz's systems are reactivated and restored by her love for Brightbill, and the two destroy Vontra and escape the dropship before it explodes. Although victorious, Roz decides to leave the island to protect her animal friends from future attacks. She promises them that her manufacturers cannot take away her sentience and that she will find a way to return. Months later, Roz is working in a greenhouse at Universal Dynamics headquarters and appears to have been reset to factory settings. Brightbill sneaks in and approaches Roz, who reveals she still has her memories and the two embrace. Also starring Matt Berry as Paddler the neurotic beaver, Dee Bradley Baker as Raccoons / Squirrels / Badgers, Collin Erker as the Skunk, and Randy Thom as RECOs. Nyong'o is splendid as the naïve robot, Pascal is likeable as the mischievous fox, Hsu is good as the seemingly friendly but nasty robot, and Berry gets some funny moments as the easily annoyed beaver. The story of a machine learning to adapt to its hostile surroundings and becoming an adoptive parent is charming, it takes inspiration from The Iron Giant, the third act is unnecessarily action-packed and a bit much, but overall it is a sweet, colourful, beautiful and enjoyable computer-animation science-fiction survival adventure. Very good!
Transformers One (2024)
Transformers One
First came the Hasbro toys, then there was the cartoon TV series and its spinoff movie, and then there was the Michael Bay live-action movies, this latest in the popular franchise is a reboot and prequel going back to original animation roots, directed by Josh Cooley (Toy Story 4). Basically, Cybertron is a planet inhabited by sentient robots fuelled by a substance called Energon. Most inhabitants are fitted with transformation cogs, devices that allow them to transform into vehicles. In the city of Iacon, Orion Pax (Chris Hemsworth), a mining robot without a cog, sneaks into an archive. He finds and watches a documentary on the Primes, the first Cybertronians made directly by their creator Primus. Orion is caught by security guards, but his best friend D-16 (Brian Tyree Henry) bails him out. During an Energon mining excavation where Orion and D-16 work, a cave-in occurs, and fellow miner Jazz (Evan Michael Lee) is trapped. While Orion and D-16 save Jazz, their overseer, Darkwing (Isaac C. Singleton Jr.), blames the incident on their superior, Elita-1 (Scarlett Johansson), and she is demoted. Cybertron's leader, Sentinel Prime (Jon Hamm), returns from an expedition to the planet's surface, claiming to have been fighting against invading Quintesson aliens. Sentinel organises a Big Race Event to celebrate his victory. Orion longs to enter the race to prove themselves as more than miners. He and D-16 sneak into a viewing point and use jet packs to race themselves; they initially gain an advantage against their competitors but ultimately lose. Sentinel meets with them; he praises them and promises to reward them for inadvertently boosting mining morale. But Darkwing intervenes and dumps the two into garbage incineration beneath the city, where they meet the eccentric B-127 (Keegan-Michael Key). Among the junk, they discover a chip containing a distress message from Alpha Trion, one of the Primes, with details of the missing Matrix of Leadership, a powerful artefact. Orion convinces D-16 and B-127 to travel with him to the surface using the signal coordinates. Elita catches them and initially wants to report them to regain her position, but they persuade her to join them as they hitchhike onto a cargo train to the surface. The four eventually find the corpses of the Primes in a cave, along with a deactivated Alpha Trion (Laurence Fishburne). Upon reactivation, Trion reveals that Sentinel betrayed the Primes and has secretly been working for the Quintessons, giving them supplies of Energon regularly in exchange for letting him rule Cybertron. It is also revealed that the miners had their cogs removed to keep them subservient. Trion provides the group with cogs, returning their powers, and allowing them to transform; they practise their abilities on their journey back to the city. They are also given a chip carrying evidence of Sentinel's treason. Sentinel and his forces then arrive, capturing and killing Trion. Evading their pursuers, the team travels back to Iacon to expose Sentinel. But they are captured by the High Guard, former warbots of the Primes rebelling against Sentinel. Orion grows concerned by D-16's increasing aggression since learning the truth about Sentinel; D-16 takes command of the warbots by defeating their leader, Starscream (Steve Buscemi). Sentinel's forces then find them, and in the ensuing battle, D-16, B-127, and half the High Guard are captured while the evidence chip containing Sentinel's betrayal is destroyed. Orion, encouraged by Elita, rallies the remaining High Guard members and returns to Iacon to rescue their comrades. Once there, Orion convinces the miners to rebel while Elita broadcasts the memory recordings of Airachnid (Vanessa Liguori), the lieutenant of Sentinel, to expose him throughout the city. After defeating Sentinel, however, Orion and D-16 argue over whether to execute him, resulting in D-16 accidentally shooting his friend. He is initially horrified but ultimately lets Orion fall to his death. D-16 renames himself "Megatron", he kills Sentinel and commands the High Guard to destroy Iacon. The spirits of Primus and the Primes bestow Orion with the Matrix of Leadership, reviving him as "Optimus Prime". Returning to the city, Optimus defeats Megatron before exiling him and the High Guard. The Matrix is used to restore all the miners' cogs and Cybertron's dried-up Energon reserves. Optimus christens his followers as Autobots and sends a warning message to the Quintessons to stay away. Meanwhile, Megatron renames the High Guard into the Decepticons and declares war on Optimus. Also starring Jon Bailey as Soundwave, Jason Konopisos-Alvarez as Shockwave, and James Remar as Zeta Prime. Hemsworth, Johansson, Key, and Hamm all provide suitable for the characters, the animation resembling the original television show is a good choice, it works well as an origins story, it might be slightly predictable but it is exciting and funny at the right moments, certainly something for all the family, an enjoyable computer-animated science-fiction action. Transformers (action figures) was number 17 on 100 Greatest Toys, and (TV series) was number 37 on The 100 Greatest Cartoons. Good!
The Transformers: The Movie (1986)
Transformers: The Movie
During the success of the Hasbro toys, and long before the Michael Bay live-action movies, there was this 1980s cartoon feature film spinoff from the popular cartoon television series which was not rated well by critics. Basically, in the year 2005, Cybertron, the home planet of the Autobots, has been conquered by the evil Decepticons. Operating from Cybertron's two moons, the heroic Autobots are preparing a counter-offensive. Optimus Prime (Peter Cullen), leader of the Autobots, sends a shuttle to Autobot City on Earth for supplies. The Decepticons discover this plan, they kill several Autobots and hijack the ship. Hot Rod (Judd Nelson) is fishing with Daniel Witwicky (David Mendenhall) on Earth in Autobot City when the hijacked shuttle is spotted, and a battle breaks out. Optimus arrives with reinforcements and fights with Megatron (Frank Welker), leader of the Decepticons. Both are mortally wounded, forcing the Decepticons to retreat to space in Astrotrain (Jack Angel). Optimus passes the Matrix of Leadership, a powerful artefact, to Ultra Magnus (Robert Stack). Before dying, Megatron tells Ultra Magnus that its power will light the Autobots' darkest hour. To conserve fuel, the Decepticons' treacherous second-in-command Starscream (Christopher Collins) orders the jettison of wounded members, including Megatron who is abandoned. Drifting in space, the wounded Decepticons are found by the sentient planet Unicron (Orson Welles, in one of his final roles) who consumes other worlds. Unicron offers Megatron a new body in exchange for destroying the Matrix, which has the power to destroy Unicron. Megatron reluctantly agrees and becomes Galvatron (Leonard Nimoy), while the other jettisoned Decepticons are converted into his new troops. On Cybertron, the Decepticons are carrying out the coronation of Starscream as the new leader. This is disrupted by Galvatron who kills Starscream. The moons of Cybertron are consumed by Unicron, including the secret bases with Autobots and Spike Witwicky (Corey Burton), Daniel's father. Galvatron retakes command of the Decepticons and leads his forces to seek out Ultra Magnus at the ruined Autobot City. The surviving Autobots escape in separate shuttles which are shot down by the Decepticons and crash on different planets. Hot Rod and Kup (Lionel Stander) are taken prisoner by the Quintessons, tyrants who hold informal courts and execute prisoners by feeding them to the Sharkticons. Hot Rod and Kup learn of Unicron from Kranix (Norman Alden), a lone survivor of Lithone, one of the planets devoured by Unicron. After Kranix is executed, Hot Rod and Kup escape, aided by the Dinobots Wheelie (Frank Welker), a small Autobot who helps them find an escape ship. The other Autobots land on the Planet of Junk, where they are attacked by the native Junkions led by Wreck-Gar (Eric Idle), who then hide from Galvatron's arriving forces. Ultra Magnus secures the remaining Autobots but fails to release the power of the Matrix. Magnus is destroyed by Galvatron, who seizes the Matrix, which he intends to use to control Unicron. The arriving Autobots from Quintesson led by Hot Rod befriend Wreck-Gar and the Junkions, who in return rebuilds Ultra Magnus. The Autobots and the Junkions realise that Galvatron now has the Matrix, and they fly to Cybertron. Galvatron attempts to threaten Unicron, but like Ultra Magnus, cannot activate the Matrix. In response, Unicron transforms into a colossal robot and takes Cybertron apart. When Galvatron attacks him, Unicron swallows him and the Matrix whole. The Autobots arrive while Unicron continues to battle Decepticons, Junkions, and other defenders of Cybertron. Daniel saves his father from Unicron's digestive system, and several Autobots are rescued by the group. Galvatron tries to form an alliance with Hot Rod, but Unicron forces him to attack. Hot Rod is almost killed but recovers and activates the Matrix, becoming Rodimus Prime (Judd Nelson), the new Autobot leader. Rodimus tosses Galvatron into space and uses the Matrix's power to destroy Unicron, then escapes with the other Autobots. With the Decepticons in disarray, the Autobots celebrate the end of the war and the retaking of their home planet, while Unicron's severed head orbits Cybertron. Also starring Peter Cullen as Ironhide, Susan Blu as Arcee, Frank Welker as Soundwave / Rumble / Frenzy / Ravage, Neil Ross as Bonecrusher / Hook / Springer / Slag, Scatman Crothers as Jazz, Dan Gilvezan as Bumblebee, Don Messick as Scavenger, Gregg Berger as Grimlock, Paul Eiding as Perceptor, Buster Jones as Blaster, John Moschitta Jr. As Blurr, Arthur Burghardt as Devastator, and Victor Caroli as the Narrator. The voices of Nimoy, Nelson, Welles, and regular Cullen are all fine, and vehicles and machines mutating into robots are alright. The problem is the animation is patchy, the plot is messy, the dialogue is cheesy with some unnecessary bad language, and the soundtrack heavy metal music by Stan Bush and "Weird Al" Yankovic in many scenes is confusing and awful, even the recognisable theme song is ruined, overall, it is a rubbish animated science-fiction action. Transformers (action figures) was number 17 on 100 Greatest Toys, and (TV series) was number 37 on The 100 Greatest Cartoons. Pretty poor!
Smile 2 (2024)
Smile 2
Some critics were slightly harsh about the original movie being cliched, I personally thought it was an effective scary movie with a format like The Ring (a curse that kills in seven days); I was excited when I saw the trailers for a sequel. Basically, six days after witnessing Rose Cotter's suicide, ex-police detective Joel (Kyle Gallner) tries to pass the Smile Entity's curse onto a pair of criminals, intending to kill one and make the other his witness. This confrontation becomes a shootout; Joel kills one of the criminals, but the intended witness dies from his injuries. Then Joel finds drug dealer Lewis Fregoli (Lukas Gage) has inadvertently witnessed the event, inheriting the curse. Joel is regretful of what has happened; he flees from approaching criminals but is fatally run over and severed by a pickup truck. In New York City, Grammy winning pop star Skye Riley (Aladdin's Naomi Scott) is preparing for her comeback tour. She appears on The Drew Barrymore Show to talk about her struggle with substance abuse and the car crash she survived which killed her boyfriend, actor Paul Hudson (Ray Nicholson); she was left with a large scar on her chest. Despite constant supervision from her mother and manager Elizabeth (Rosemarie DeWitt) and assistant Joshua (Miles Gutierrez-Riley), she is secretly addicted to Vicodin for back pain. She sneaks out to buy additional drugs from Lewis, her former school friend. She finds him in a manic state, and he almost attacks her; she assumes he is high on drugs, and he tells her he has been seeing and experiencing crazy things. Moments later, Lewis screams in terror and sees something she cannot; he displays a menacing smile and commits suicide, smashing his own face in with a weight plate. She is traumatised but does not call the emergency services because of the drugs at the scene, and she flees. Soon, the curse manifests as Skye experiences physical and auditory hallucinations, including people eerily smiling at her. On the opening night of the tour, she panics seeing a message from an unknown number telling her that they saw her at Lewis's apartment. She is also terrified by seeing Lewis's corpse behind her in the mirror. Desperate for help and comfort, she decides to follow previous advice from her mother and contacts her estranged ex-best friend Gemma (Dylan Gelula), who she has not spoken to in almost a year. Gemma shows up at her hotel, disturbed by Skye's erratic behaviour after a terrifying vision. Eventually Skye calms and confesses what happened at Lewis's place; Gemma agrees to stay with her that night and they reconcile. At a fan signing and photo session, Skye is approached by a crazed fan named Alfredo (Iván Carlo) who is dragged away by security; Skye is shaken but determined to carry on. Then she is approached by a little girl wearing braces (Mila Falkof) who says nothing and continually smiles at her. Skye has been invited to speak at a charity event, initiated by music executive Darius (Raúl Castillo). The teleprompter stalls and Skye is forced to give an embarrassing impromptu speech until the stall is revealed to be a hallucination. Then when it works again, Skye begins introducing the next speaker, and the audience is shocked when she speaks the name Paul Hudson. She then sees a smiling Paul begin to approach her. In a panic, she lashes out, accidentally injuring an elderly patron onstage and causing bad publicity. When Skye receives another message from the unknown number, the texter is aware of what is happening and that she is in danger, and she arranges to meet them in a bar. Former nurse Morris (Peter Jacobson) has been tracking the entity because it killed his brother, who possessed killed himself with a crowbar. He explains that the curse passes to anyone who witnesses the victim's death, and he has tracked it back from eight victims, all of whom have died within a week. Morris theorises the parasitic entity cannot be passed without a host and that (temporarily) killing the current host will stop it. He suggests stopping Skye's heart and then resuscitating her to break the curse. She is horrified at the idea, and she flees after being recognised by bar patrons. At her apartment, the entity appears as all her backup dancers, smiling and surrounding her. The entity attacks her and leaves her with a concussion. A flashback reveals that Skye and Paul had a bitter drug-fuelled argument while he was driving; she caused the accident by turning the wheel and they crashed into a tree off-road, killing him. Skye wakes at a wellness retreat and has a bitter argument with her mother concerning the tour. She watches in horror as her mother is revealed to be the entity, smiling, and stabbing herself in the face. Skye then realises she is covered in blood and was possessed into killing her mother. Skye runs out of the room, grabs a security guard's gun and escapes the wellness retreat. She reunites with Gemma outside, with Skye carjacking her own private driver, and Gemma drives them away. Skye tells Gemma to drive to a location determined by Morris for the resuscitation procedure. Moments later, the real Gemma calls Skye, revealing the entity has been impersonating her the entire time. Skye wakes herself up from her trance, waking dazed and confused behind the wheel. Skye meets Morris at an abandoned Pizza Hut restaurant, where they plan to use the walk-in freezer to slow the process and prevent permanent brain damage. Morris gives her the syringe with the solution to slow her heart rate and steps out of the room. The entity appears again, appearing as Skye's past self, and attacks her again. Desperate, Skye injects herself with the syringe, but the entity mocks her, revealing she's still hallucinating. Skye suddenly finds herself on stage at her tour's opening night at Madison Square Garden. She sees Joshua, Darius, and a still-alive Elizabeth in the audience along with thousands of happy screaming fans. Unseen by others, the entity reveals its true form to Skye as a skinless, semi-humanoid monstrosity with multiple pairs of nested smiles. The monster forces its way into her body by crawling through her mouth. To the audience, she appears to choke and collapse. Then Skye stands up, possessed and smiling eerily, which is projected on the big screens. The audience watches in horror as Skye brutally stabs herself in the eye with her microphone, passing the curse to the thousands of horrified spectators. Also starring Zebedee Row as Alexi, Roberts Jekabsons as Yev, Sean Stolzen as Maksim, Drew Barrymore as herself, and Trevor Newlin as the Monstrosity. Scott gives a compelling performance as the singer going through both the pressures of stardom and the nasty apparitions, the story cleverly weaves the themes of drug use with the demonic visions, the eerie atmosphere is effective, the jump scares are well done, the violent moments are suitably grisly, and the pop song and dance routines every so often are catchy. I will admit the ending was a bit uneven and adds questions as to what will happen in a third movie, but overall, this is a worthwhile psychological supernatural horror. Good!
The Outrun (2024)
The Outrun
I watched trailers for this film a few times before its release, and I was up for a movie with the actress from Hanna, Brooklyn, and Lady Bird; I recognised it was a film about alcohol addiction, so it is possibly one that could be nominated during Awards Season. Basically, the story is told in a non-linear order. Rona (Saoirse Ronan) is a young Irish woman recently out of rehabilitation following a decade of alcoholism treatment. Wanting to help clear her mind and remain sober, she returns to the family home on the Orkney Islands in Scotland. Her English parents, Andrew (Stephen Dillane), who is bipolar, and Annie (Saskia Reeves), who is religious, have been separated for a long time. Staying with them alternately, Rona helps her father on his farm and meets her mother's religious friends. Flashbacks show Rona during her student years in London, where she was a biology graduate. She often went clubbing and had a relationship with her boyfriend Daynin (Paapa Essiedu). However, Rona's drinking turns to alcoholism, causing problems in her relationship, and unintentional injury. Eventually, Daynin cannot cope with her behaviour and leaves her. One night, Rona is attacked while drunk. Soon afterwards, she enters rehab and completes a 90-day sober program. Back on the Orkneys, Rona struggles to connect with others. Rona decides to return to London, but on the ferry, she has an overwhelming urge to drink and abandons her plan to leave. She finds work with the Royal Society for the Protection of Birds which involves a systematic search for the rare bird the corn crake, listening for its distinctive call. One day, visiting her father, Rona finds him in a non-responsive state. On the side she finds his abandoned wineglass and dips her finger in the red wine to taste, leading to a brief relapse. Soon afterwards, Rona gets a job with the RSPB on the remote Papa Westray island, home to a tiny community. Living by herself, she connects with some of the other islanders and attends Alcoholics Anonymous. She still struggles to avoid the temptation to drink and tries swimming in the cold water. A fellow alcoholic who runs the grocery store assures her that he has been sober for several years and that it does become easier. During a windy winter on Papa Westray, she develops an interest in seaweed biology and her mother is pleased she is becoming healthier. As she prepares to depart that spring, Rona hears the call of a corn crake for the first time and laughs in delight. Also starring Lauren Lyle as Julie, Naomi Wirthner as Amanda, EastEnders' Nabil Elouahabi as Samir, Tony Hamilton-Croft as Gary, Conrad Williamson as Jack, and Seamus Dillane as James the Barman. Ronan gives a terrific raw performance as the girl trying to control her demons and her tempestuous nature. It is a simple enough story of addiction, although the backwards and forwards storytelling can be slightly confusing at times. However, it is good not to slip into drastic melodrama, the emotional moments are controlled and realistic, and the sights of the island (apparently this is the first major film set in the Orkneys) make for great viewing, a worthwhile drama. Good!
Terrifier 3 (2024)
Terrifier 3
The first Terrifier was a gory cult hit with limited screenings, the second was a bigger hit mostly through streaming and again limited screenings, this third entry was properly released in various cinemas and with another increased budget. It was receiving notoriety, including being banned in France (the first time for a film since Saw III in 2006) and with reports of audience reactions, including vomiting and walkouts, so I had to see it, written and directed by Damien Leone (All Hallows' Eve). Basically, it opens with a man in a festive red suit entering the home of a family while a little girl named Juliet (Luciana VanDette) sneaks downstairs. The man goes upstairs with an axe; the sounds of the girl's brother Timmy (Kellen Raffaelo) being slaughtered are heard. The man then goes into the parents' bedroom; wife/mother Jennifer (Krsy Fox) wakes in terror finding Art the Clown (David Howard Thornton), dressed as Santa Claus dismembering her husband Mark (Alex Ross). After hacking her as well, Art goes downstairs to have cookies and milk, does some washing up, and finds Juliet hiding in a cupboard (he presumably kills her as well). Five years earlier, Art's decapitated corpse is reanimated and goes to the mental asylum where survivor Victoria Heyes (Samantha Scaffidi) has just given birth to his head. They kill a nurse and a guard before fleeing to an abandoned house to hide out. After restoring Art's head, Victoria slashes her arm to drain her blood into a bathtub while Art sits in a rocking chair beside an upstairs window. In the present, Sienna Shaw (Lauren LaVera) has been released from a psychiatric hospital. She goes to stay with her aunt Jessica (Margaret Anne Florence) and her husband Greg (Bryce Johnson), along with their daughter Gabbie (Antonella Rose), who idolises Sienna but has no knowledge of events. Despite going through treatment for trauma, Sienna is still haunted by visions of her deceased friends. Meanwhile, she has become estranged from her younger brother Jonathan (Elliott Fullam) who is starting college and wants to move on with his life. At the abandoned house, demolition workers Dennis (Jon Abrahams) and Jackson (Michael Genet) stumble upon the bodies of Art and Victoria who are woken from their slumber. They kill the two workers and venture off on another killing spree. At a bar, Santa Claus impersonator Charles "Charlie" Johnson (Daniel Roebuck) is having a drink. Art enters and drinks with him and patron Smokey (Clint Howard), but Charlie and bar owner Eddie (Bradley Stryker) are angered by his inappropriate behaviour. Art murders Eddie and Smokey, shooting them with a gun, and he knocks Charlie unconscious. When Charlie wakes, he finds himself tied to a chair; Art steals his Santa Claus costume, and then sprays him with a canister containing liquid nitrogen, freezing his face and limbs, shattering them with a hammer and killing him; he sticks a carrot in his smashed face like a snowman's nose. Sienna and Jessica go Christmas shopping together at the mall, and Sienna is shaken seeing a figure dressed in a Santa suit wearing a mask waving at her. Art goes to the department store Santa's Grotto, impersonating the mall Santa, passing soft toys to the children but unsettling the gathered parents. After being escorted away by security, and after the return of the real mall Santa (Chip Carriere), a boy opens a box, triggering a bomb inside, and the explosion kills several bystanders. Sienna tells her relatives what she witnessed before the bombing, but they do not believe her, assuming she is having a mental episode. Sienna visits Jonathan at his university, where she meets Jonathan's dorm roommate Cole (Mason Mecartea) and his girlfriend Mia (Alexa Blair Robertson), who hosts a true crime podcast. Mia is obsessed with the Miles County Massacre and pressures Sienna and Jonathan to participate in an interview about the murderer. Sienna angrily refuses and berates Mia for not considering the feelings of victims of the crimes. Sienna tells Jonathan about the masked man she saw and thinks Art is still alive. They learn that demons can be reborn through a host, like Victoria, and there are angels opposite to these demons. Sienna tells Jonathan she plans to return to the Terrifier attraction at the abandoned fairground to retrieve the sword gifted to her by her father Michael (Jason Patric). Flashbacks reveal that Michael, a comic book illustrator, created an angel warrior character for young Sienna (Luciana Elisa Quinonez). At Jonathan's university, Cole and Mia are having sex in the showers. Art arrives and kills them with a chainsaw, mutilating Cole's backside and private parts, and severing Mia's limbs and face. Sienna learns about the killings on the news and panics. She insists on calling Jonathan and Greg agrees to go and pick him up. Sienna falls asleep and dreams about the angels crafting her angel warrior costume. She wakes to find Art and Victoria have invaded her home, and Art knocks her out with a mallet. When Sienna regains consciousness, she sees Greg's naked corpse bloodied and pinned to the wall and Jess tied up in a chair across from her. Victoria shows them a skinned head being consumed by rats, claiming it is Gabbie. Victoria then kills Jess by hammering a tube down her throat, forcing rats to scurry in with a blowtorch. Art suddenly enters with Gabbie as a hostage, and Victoria reveals to Sienna that the head is, in fact, Jonathan's. Victoria places a crown of thorns on Sienna's head and tries to possess Sienna but she is strong enough to resist this. Victoria prepares to kill Sienna and Gabbie before a wrapped present is pointed out resting under the Christmas tree. Despite her hands being smashed, Sienna manages to open the gift; she stabs Victoria with its contents, her father's sword. Sienna decapitates Victoria, who disintegrates. Art attacks Sienna with his chainsaw, but with her blade, she gains the upper hand and stabs him in the back. Victoria's blood burns through the floor and opens a portal to Hell. Gabbie falls and holds onto the edge, and Sienna leaves Art behind to save her. She holds her sword by the sharp edges to let Gabbie grab the handle to pull her up, but she cannot save Gabbie, and she falls into the abyss along with the sword. Sienna initially weeps while Art flees through a window. But Sienna is perplexed to see her lacerated hands healing, and she vows to find and rescue Gabbie. It ends with Art boarding a bus out of town. Also starring Chris Jericho as Burke the orderly, Tom Savini as a bystander, Stephen Cofield Jr. As Officer Evans, Phil Falcone as Tom the Bus Driver, Andrew Hollinger as the department store Elf, Robert Catalano as the Photographer, and Corinne Kelly as the Bag Lady. Thornton is still sinister as the insane black-and-white circus performer who is silent and often smiley throughout his various murders, Scaffidi as his facially disfigured sidekick is equally nasty, and LaVera remains a feisty cosplayer heroine. This is easily the most extreme, brutal, stomach-churning, gross, and blood-soaked of the trilogy so far with its barrage of gory violence, I squirmed frequently as characters are mutilated, torn apart, and hacked up by the antagonist, who has become a cultural icon of the genre. The festive setting adds a little something to it, there are touches of humour in amongst the slaughter, the atmosphere and tension are still spot on, and it feels like a throwback to the days of the "video nasties", I'm confident the fourth entry will only be bloodier, this is a most watchable Christmas slasher horror. Good!
A Different Man (2024)
A Different Man
I found out about this film online somewhere and instantly recognised the British star of Under the Skin, then I found out that the leading actor was in prosthetic makeup to look like he has the same facial disability, I was curious what this film would have to offer. Basically, in New York City, Edward Lemuel (Captain America: The Winter Soldier's Sebastian Stan) is a reclusive man and struggling actor with the facial condition neurofibromatosis. He lives alone in his apartment which has a damaged leaking ceiling and a bearded neighbour a few doors away who acts strangely and later hangs himself. Aspiring playwright Ingrid Vold (Renate Reinsve) moves into the apartment next door and befriends Edward. One day, she meets Ingrid who aids him when he cuts his hand and gives him an unused typewriter. As they get to know each other he is too nervous to tell her about his feelings for her because he believes she will reject him. During a medical examination, Edward is informed about an experimental medical treatment to cure him of his condition. The scientists start by creating a wearable mask cast of his original face as a reference for his progress and as a memento for his change. He receives an injection that will slowly cause his non-cancerous tumours to peel from his face. Over time, the tumours are painfully shed, leaving behind good skin and revealing a "normal" face in the mirror. He avoids being seen by Ingrid, and when scientist Dr. Flexner (Malachi Weir) comes to visit him, he assumes the identity of "Guy Moratz" and claims that Edward has killed himself. Feeling comfortable going out, he goes to a bar he previously visited to see public reactions to his new face and finds himself able to socialise. Sometime later, "Guy" has become a wealthy and successful real estate agent, with his face on cardboard cut-outs advertising the company. One day, he discovers that Ingrid is producing a play off-Broadway titled Edward, a Beauty and the Beast kind of story based on Edward's life. He originally auditions as a secondary character with a normal face but then returns wearing the mask of his original face. Ingrid is unsure of casting an actor without facial disfigurement, but he says he is suitable for the role and gives convincing a moving performance. Edward and Ingrid begin a relationship, and she remains unaware of his true identity. One night, whilst having sex, she asks him to wear the mask, but she cannot take their lovemaking seriously. During rehearsals, Edward is critical about the ending of the play, with the lead character committing suicide. She agrees and rewrites it to have a more positive ending and to make the character more sympathetic, but the changing script only causes him problems. One day, they are visited by Oswald (Adam Pearson), an English man with neurofibromatosis who has taken an interest in the play. Edward is stunned to see a man with his former affliction and confused by his outgoing demeanour. The confident and charismatic Oswald quickly befriends the cast and crew and joins them to give advice on the leading character based on his own experiences. Ingrid and Oswald grow closer, and after Edward is unable to remember his lines, she decides to recast Oswald in the lead role. The play is a success, and Oswald's performance receives rave reviews. Edward spends some time with Oswald who is charismatic and popular; they go to a karaoke bar and he is confident to get onstage and sing in front of a crowd. Edward's mental state begins to deteriorate because he is confused as to why Oswald seems to have a better life than he does despite his facial disfigurement, and he later begins stalking Oswald. Edward has a breakdown and decides to wear his mask during a house viewing, but he disturbs the customers with his outlandish behaviour, and he is fired from the estate agents. Then he flips out, storming the stage during a performance of the play, physically attacking Oswald and berating him for taking his life. During the fight, part of the set is damaged and falls on Edward, breaking his legs and arms. While recovering from his injuries, he moves back into his former apartment next to Ingrid. She is now living with Oswald, and they are making plans to adapt the play into a feature film. They have a meeting regarding the film with Hollywood star Michael Shannon (as himself). One day, Edward's physical therapist speaks about Oswald behind his back and expresses disgust about his face. An angered Edward stabs the therapist to death and is sent to prison for murder. Years later, following his release, an older Edward once again encounters Oswald. They go to dinner together; Oswald and Ingrid are married and have become a highly successful creative duo. They talk about planning their retirement to a commune in Canada, which may or may not be a nudist colony. A waiter arrives to take their orders, but a visibly nervous Edward struggles to choose from the menu. Oswald jokes that Edward hasn't changed a bit. Also starring C. Mason Wells as Carl, Owen Kline as Nick, Charlie Korsmo as Ron Belcher, Patrick Wang as a director, Mark Geller as Ragged Man, John Keating as Dr. Varno, Corey R. Taylor as Luther, David Joseph Regelmann as Dr. Jewell, Nina White as Dr. Trutz, Cornelius Horgan as the Bartender, Peter D. Straus as the Abraham Lincoln performer. Stan gives an interesting performance as the man who is no happier after changing his face, Reinsve does alright as the woman who admires him with his disfigurement, unknowingly without, and then moves on with another man with it, and Pearson (who has neurofibromatosis in real life) almost steals the show with his supporting but winning, charming, and funny performance as the man who perplexes the lead character. The science-fiction element is fine, the change of the lead character's physical identity and later sane personality works well, it has great special effects makeup, and it does make good points about social prejudice regarding disability, it is dark and uncomfortable sometimes, but it is ambitious and artistic, an interesting black comedy psychological thriller. Good!
In America (2002)
In America
I happened upon this film when it was broadcast on television some years ago, I remembered the scene for a long time, so I was glad when I finally got the opportunity to watch the full feature, directed by Jim Sheridan (My Left Foot, In the Name of the Father, Brothers). Basically, set in 1982, the Sullivan family, husband/father Johnny (Paddy Considine), wife/mother Sarah (Oscar nominated Samantha Morton) and their daughters Christy (Sarah Bolger) and Ariel (Emma Bolger), have moved from Ireland via Canada to the United States (they are illegal immigrants). The family settles in New York City, in Hell's Kitchen, Manhattan, in a rundown apartment building occupied by drug addicts, transvestites, and a reclusive Nigerian artist/photographer named Mateo Kuamey (Oscar nominated Djimon Hounsou). The death of five-year-old son Frankie, who fell down the stairs and later discovered a fatal brain tumour, still hangs over the family. The devout Roman Catholic Johnny, who is trying to continue a career in acting, has lost the ability to express and feel true emotions, affecting his relationship with his family. Christy believes she has been granted three wishes by her dead brother, and she waits for the right moment to use them when the family is in desperate circumstances. While Johnny unsuccessfully auditions for any role he can get on stage, Sarah gets a job in the local ice cream parlour to support the family. Despite their poverty, exploring the American culture and the closeness of the family gives them the energy to make the most of what they have. Christy often chronicles with a cherished camcorder. As money runs low, there is a heatwave; Johnny finds an abandoned air conditioner which he buys an adapter plug to try and get working but it causes a power cut. The family dip into savings to go to the cinema to see ET the Extra-Terrestrial where they can enjoy air conditioning and the movie. The family later go to a carnival where they find a ball and bucket target game to win an ET cuddly toy. Johnny squanders large sums of their much-needed money to get seven balls in the bucket to win the toy, and after Christy makes a wish to Frankie, he successfully wins the toy and their money back. As the summer heat continues, tensions rise between Johnny and Sarah, but they talk things through and make love. Their financial and emotional strain is made more difficult when Sarah discovers she is pregnant. Eventually, Johnny finds work as a cab driver to improve their income for the baby and to help pay for the girls' Catholic school tuition. On Halloween, Christy and Ariel dress up and go trick-or-treating in the neighbourhood and the apartment building. The girls knock on Mateo's door, he is initially angry but slowly warms to them. Johnny is reticent about the somewhat imposing and forbidding man, but Sarah agrees the girls can invite Mateo to dinner. They learn that Mateo is a sad and lonely man because he is dying of AIDS. They spend more time with their new friend, including a snowball fight during the winter. Later, Mateo falls down the apartment building's flight of stairs and is knocked unconscious. Christy tries to resuscitate him using CPR, but the other residents warn her that he is HIV-positive and discourage her. While Mateo's condition continues to deteriorate, Sarah's fetus develops; doctors warn her that she or the child could during labour, but she is determined to go ahead with it. The baby is born prematurely and in poor health, needing a blood transfusion, making Johnny and Sarah nervous about the baby's survival chances. This is combined with the skyrocketing hospital bills to be paid following the baby's delivery. While recovering in the hospital, Sarah has a brief nervous breakdown, blaming Johnny for Frankie's death and tearfully berating him. After calming her down, Johnny and Sarah agree to the blood transfusion but insist they are reluctant to use hospital blood banks as this was the source of Mateo's contraction of HIV. Shortly, it is discovered that Christy has a compatible blood type to donate. Mateo's death coincides with the first healthy movements of the infant following a blood transfusion from Christy. After the successful operation, Johnny is startled to find that the astronomical hospital bill has already been paid. The fee was settled by Mateo before he died because he had a large trust fund he never spent. Johnny and Sarah give the newborn baby girl, Sarah (Molly Glynn), the middle name of Mateo in gratitude and to honour his memory. Following the baby's birth and the death of Mateo, Johnny is finally able to overcome his lack of emotion and put his grieving for Frankie to rest. Later, he gets a break by getting a small role in A Chorus Line on Broadway. The film ends with the Sullivan family holding a baby shower with many of the apartment building tenants present to celebrate, and Christy and the rest of her family look at the Moon looking out for Mateo in the night sky. Also starring Ciaran Cronin as Frankie, Merrina Millsapp as Marina, Guy Carleton as the Man at the Carnival, Adrian Martinez as the Shopkeeper, Bob Gallico as the Theatre Director, Jason Killalee as the Assistant Theatre Director, and Des Bishop as the Stockbroker in the Taxi. Morton (who has short hair following her role in Minority Report) gives a great performance as the struggling mum who tries to stay positive, Considine is good as the emotionless dad, Hounsou is interesting as the reclusive neighbour who opens up to and becomes friendly, and the real-life Bolger sisters are fantastic as the children. It is a splendid semi-autobiographical story from the point-of-view of a child with strong messages about hope, faith and love, there are the dark moments that make it gritty, but they do not overshadow an overall feeling of childhood wonder and exploration, a satisfactory mostly heart-warming drama. It was nominated the Oscar for Best Writing, Original Screenplay for Jim Sheridan and his daughters Naomi and Kirsten. Very good!
Joker: Folie à Deux (2024)
Joker: Folie à Deux
Released the same year that DC Comics was celebrating the 85th anniversary of Batman, this sequel (translated "madness for two") was originally unplanned, with the original film being a standalone. There was much speculation about the format (with song and dance numbers) and the introduction of the lead character's sidekick and girlfriend, and it was receiving mixed to negative reviews but I was always going to see it, directed by Todd Phillips (Road Trip, The Hangover, War Dogs). Basically, it opens with a Looney Tunes style cartoon, where the Joker fights his own shadow who tries to impersonate him at a red-carpet event for his own TV show. The shadow takes his place to perform a singing number before abandoning the Joker onstage and three policemen arrive and beat him. At Arkham State Hospital, Arthur Fleck (Joaquin Phoenix) is in custody awaiting trial for the crimes he committed two years ago, specifically five counts of murder. His lawyer, Maryanne Stewart (Catherine Keener), plans to argue that Arthur has dissociative identity disorder and that the "Joker", his secondary personality, is responsible for the crimes. The guards of the hospital, led by the abusive Jackie Sullivan (Brendan Gleeson), take advantage of Arthur, bribing him with cigarettes to tell jokes. For his good behaviour and to increase his chances, Arthur is taken to the B ward where there is a music therapy session. There, he meets another patient, Harleen "Lee" Quinzel (Lady Gaga) who recognises him on television and admires him for killing TV chat show host Murray Franklin. Lee confides to Arthur that she grew up in the same neighbourhood he did, had an abusive father who died in a car crash and was committed after burning down her parents' apartment building. Arthur confesses to her that he actually killed six people; he killed his mother smothering her in hospital. In B war, during a film screening of The Band Wagon, Lee starts a fire. She and Arthur are caught trying to escape, and Arthur is placed in solitary confinement. Lee visits him to tell him she is being released to avoid his influence. She promises to attend his trial, and after painting his face with makeup they have sex. Arthur is interviewed by television personality Paddy Meyers (Steve Coogan) as part of his defence campaign. During the interview, Arthur sings to Lee through the television screen, deepening her love for him. On the day of the trial, Assistant District Attorney Harvey Dent (Harry Lawtey) calls witnesses who dismiss Arthur's claims of insanity. During a break, Maryanne reveals that Lee has been lying to him; she was a psychiatry student who grew up in the Upper West Side, and her father is a doctor and is alive. Furthermore, she voluntarily committed herself and checked herself out, and she never burned down an apartment building. Lee visits him and he confronts her about her lies, she confesses that she wanted to get closer to him. She then tells him that she is pregnant and has moved into his old apartment building wanting to make a home for them. At the trial the next day, Arthur's former neighbour Sophie Dumond (Zazie Beetz), whom Arthur had an obsessive crush on (he previously fantasised them in a relationship), is called to give her testimony. Arthur has become unsatisfied with Maryanne's defence representation; he dismisses and informs Judge Herman Rothwax (Bill Smitrovich) that he wants to defend himself. As the case reaches its final stages, Arthur chooses to don his Joker makeup and costume. Arthur's former co-worker Gary Puddles (Celebrity Juice's Leigh Gill) is brought to the stand. Gary details Arthur killing their colleague, admitting that he has been terrified ever since, and cries because Arthur was the only person who treated him well. Arthur, visibly affected by Gary's testimony, offers no defence, but he mocks the Arkham guards and indicates that they abuse him. Returning to Arkham, he is taken by Sullivan and two guards to the showers and brutally assaulted before being dragged to his cell partially naked. Arthur's fellow inmate and friend Ricky Meline (Jacob Lofland) verbally confronts the guards, resulting in Jackie strangling him to death. During his closing argument in court the following day, a devastated Arthur renounces his Joker persona, taking full responsibility for his actions. Lee is enraged and storms out, and the jury finds Arthur guilty of first-degree murder. But while the foreman (Angela D. Watson) is reading the verdict, a car bomb explodes outside the courthouse, destroying the building. Several people are killed, and many others injured, including Dent who has the left side of his face heavily scarred (becoming Two-Face). Arthur wakes and stumbles out of the building, and two followers dressed as clowns help him to escape. Eventually, Arthur gets out of the car and runs from the followers. Arthur wanders through Gotham City and encounters Lee outside his old apartment, but she rejects him for renouncing his Joker persona. As she leaves, the police surround Arthur, and he allows them to apprehend and return him to Arkham. The next day, Arthur is informed he has a visitor (we never see who it is); he is approached by a young inmate (Connor Storrie) who asks to tell him a joke he has been working on. The "punchline" is the inmate repeatedly stabbing Arthur in the abdomen. As Arthur bleeds to death, his assailant carves a smile on his own face while laughing hysterically. Arthur imagines himself and Lee onstage for a showtune before he dies. Also starring Ken Leung as Dr. Victor Liu, Sharon Washington as social worker Debra Kane, Alfred Rubin Thompson as Ernie Bullock, Gregg Daniel as the Music Teacher, June Carryl as Dr. Louise Beatty, and Martin Kildare as the News Anchor. Phoenix (who deservedly won the Oscar for the predecessor) is good as the self-pitying former comedian turned criminal, Lady Gaga is interesting as his equally kooky love interest (Harley Quinn), they have great chemistry whilst smitten and singing together, Gleeson offers interesting support as the dodgy Irish guard, Coogan is slightly annoying and pointless, Gill has a memorable scene, and Keener, Lawtey and Beetz are fine. The songs performed by Phoenix and Lady Gaga (all related to happiness, smiling, laughing, love and entertainment) include "Get Happy", "For Once in My Life", "If My Friends Could See Me Now", "When You're Smiling (The Whole World Smiles with You)", "That's Entertainment", "To Love Somebody", "They Long to Be (Close to You)", and "Gonna Build a Mountain", and the soundtrack includes "What the World Needs Now Is Love" by Nick Cave, "When the Saints Go Marching In", "Dancing in the Moonlight" by King Harvest, "My Life" by Billy Joel, and "That's Life" by Frank Sinatra. As with the previous film, it is dark and overly depressing, but the well-put-together song and dance routines (imaginations in the minds of the leads) add a little comic relief, the court case stuff is gripping enough, and there are no complaints about the performances or vocals of the lead stars. The problem is, the film is too odd and just doesn't work as well as it could have, if it weren't for the two leads, some small gripping moments and some of the songs it would be complete rubbish; I can understand why there is so much negativity about it, I wanted to enjoy it but I just couldn't quite, a disappointing jukebox musical psychological thriller. Adequate!
Saucy!: Secrets of the British Sex Comedy (2024)
Saucy!: Secrets of the British Sex Comedy
In the late 1960s and throughout the 1970s, the British sex comedy was one of the most prominent and successful genres at the cinemas, and I was most interested to see this documentary exploring them. It was the sexual revolution in 1960s London that started to change attitudes in Great Britain towards sex, and although pornography was illegal, it did not stop British filmmakers from introducing this popular trend of films. Adult entertainment in films was mostly controlled by the BBFC (British Board of Film Classification), with film censor John Trevelyan at the helm, "protecting the public" (mostly the conservative and upper class) from depravity and corruption. Any films containing high amounts of sex or nudity were considered exploitation films, often given the X certificate (16 or over). There was a farce comedy play that mocked the "attitudes" of the time titled No Sex Please We're British. It was the Carry On films that for years entertained cinemagoers with its seaside postcard innuendo style comedy. The first mainstream film to feature nudism was the George Harrison Marks documentary Naked As Nature Intended (1961). The first exploitation film ever made for mainstream audiences was School for Sex (1969), with the "cool version" released for those easily offended, and the "hot version" released for those looking for more adult content. The term "the man in the mac" was coined throughout the period, used to describe cinemagoers (especially businessmen) who entered screenings of films containing adult content, whilst wearing mackintosh coats so that they could (presumably) do things under their coats. Soon, several independent studios were started in Wardour Street, Soho to produce more sex comedies. In 1970, the BBFC added the AA certificate (not suitable for children under 14), while the X certificate was increased to 18. The British sex comedies produced often contained female stereotypes and cliches and very few gay characters. There were some critics that loathed these films, and activist Mary Whitehouse certainly criticised them for being pornographic, but audience numbers soared and made them financial successes, with Come Play with Me (1973) playing for 4 years in the same venue. The sex comedy that is the one that really started the trend and became a major success, with its high amount of nudity, sex scenes and smutty style, was Confessions of a Window Cleaner (1974). It was the combination of British comedy stars of the time, beautiful and buxom ladies taking their clothes off and becoming icons, and silly sauciness in the slapstick scenes and written in the script that made these high grossing box office hits. Eventually though the films concentrated more on the sex and nudity than jokes and actually trying to make audiences laugh as well; the later Carry On films are examples of films like these becoming unfunny and depraved. It is fair to say that this genre of films would not be made in the modern woke times we live in, but for the time they were adored and can be admired to an extent. The documentary also detailed the increase in adult magazines, the career and tragic death of sex comedy and adult star Mary Millington, the VHS tapes/home video market ruining the cinema industry, and questions if we should feel guilty about watching these films now? The sex comedies discussed, mentioned (including in text), and pictured in the two-part programme included (in alphabetical order): Adventures of a Taxi Driver (1976), Adventures of a Private Eye (1977), Adventures of a Plumber's Mate (1978), The Amorous Milkman (1975), Au Pair Girls (1972), Can You Keep It Up for a Week? (1975), Carry On Girls (1973), Carry On Behind (1975), Carry On Emmanuelle (1978), Come Play with Me (1977), Cool It Carol! (1970), Emmanuelle in Soho (1981), Eskimo Nell (1975), For Men Only (1967), Here We Go Round the Mulberry Bush (1968), I'm Not Feeling Myself Tonight! (1976), Keep It Up, Jack (1974), Keep It Up Downstairs (1976), Mary Millington's True Blue Confessions (1980), The Playbirds (1978), Queen of the Blues (1979), Secrets of a Door-to-Door Salesman (1973), Secrets of Sex (1970), Sex Clinic (1971), Sex Farm (also known as Frustrated Wives) (1974), Sex Freaks (1974), The Sex Thief (1973), The Sexplorer (1975), School for Sex (1969), The Stud (1978), Take an Easy Ride (1979), That's Carry On (1977), The Ups and Downs of a Handyman (1976), Virgin Witch 1972), What's Good for the Goose (1969), and The Wife Swappers (1970). With contributions from Robin Askwith, Michael Armstrong (screenwriter), Nicola Austine (8mm film model), Alexandra Dane, Larry Dann, Greg Dark (assistant director), Ben Dover (ex-porn star and producer), Prudence Drage, Linzi Drew, Sally Faulkner, Angela Grant, Linda Hayden, Val Hennessey (journalist), Diane Keen, Sue Longhurst, Charles Marriott (cinematographer and son of Hazel Adair), Judy Matheson, Penny Meredith, Christopher Neil, Francoise Pascal (actress and producer), Susan Quilter (Mary Millington's cousin), George Richardson (glamour photographer), Willy Roe (director), Ken Rowles (director), Susie Silvey, Peter Sinclair (cinematographer), Gay Soper, Lacey Starr (porn producer), David Sullivan (producer/entrepreneur), Estella Tincknell (associate producer in film and culture), Oliver Tobias, Pete Walker (filmmaker), Allan Warren (celebrity photographer), and Robert Young (director). Very good!
Megalopolis (2024)
Megalopolis
Legendary director Francis Ford Coppola (The Godfather, The Conversation, Apocalypse Now, Bram Stoker's Dracula) has not made a high-profile film for over two decades, only the silly Robin Williams movie Jack and the terrific courtroom drama The Rainmaker are the last two to spring to my mind. This was a passion project for Coppola that started back in 1977, but lack of funding from several box office flops, and inevitable world events held off filming for decades, unhappy with the studio system Coppola decided to fund the project himself, I hoped this £120 million budget movie would be his comeback to his former glory. Basically, in an alternate present-day United States of America, in the city of New Rome, architect Cesar Catilina (Adam Driver), the Chairman of the Design Authority, has invented the revolutionary bio-adaptive building material Megalon. Cesar also has the ability to stop time, and his driver and assistant Fundi Romaine (Laurence Fishburne) narrates the story. He publicly announces he has designed a futuristic utopian city called Megalopolis. But the mayor, Franklyn Cicero (Breaking Bad's Giancarlo Esposito), opposes the plans and leads a smear campaign against Cesar. Financial news TV presenter Wow Platinum (Aubrey Plaza) gets closer to Cesar during his campaign, and they begin an affair. Sometime later, Cesar's wife is killed, and her body mysteriously disappears, most likely orchestrated by Cicero. Later, Wow Platinum leaves Cesar to marry the wealthy elderly bank CEO and Cesar's uncle, Hamilton Crassus III (Jon Voight), who often embarrasses himself publicly. Cicero's well-read daughter Julia (Nathalie Emmanuel) is fascinated by Cesar's visions for the city's future but is divided by loyalty toward her father. She initially distrusts Cesar when they get acquainted and spies on him, but soon develops feelings for him. Julia eventually reveals that she is immune to his ability to stop time. Cesar and Julia form a partnership for the Megalopolis project. At a lavish and decadent wedding reception for Wow Platinum and Crassus, Cesar takes drugs backstage. Crassus's depraved and flamboyant nephew Clodio Pulcher (Shia LaBeouf) often makes a show of himself in public, especially when trying to seduce various women. Clodio sabotages the reception by implicating Cesar in a sex scandal involving teenage pop star Vesta Sweetwater (Grace VanderWaal) whose virginal image is damaged. Cesar is arrested but ultimately cleared of any wrongdoing and released, while Vesta continues her career after adopting a new rebellious and sexually charged persona. Cesar and Julia begin a romantic relationship; he reveals the arrest has lost him his ability to stop time but finds that he and Julia can still stop time together. In space, the Soviet Union satellite Carthage falls out of orbit, crashing into and destroying much of the city. Cesar seizes the opportunity and begins constructing Megalopolis, despite Cicero's opposition. In a press conference, he urges the people to debate about society and asks them to consider that a better world is possible. Cesar is delighted to learn that Julia is pregnant, while Cicero is horrified. Cicero asks Cesar to leave Julia, offering him information about what happened to Teresa, but Cesar refuses. Clodio stirs things up with fascist persuasion and power of speech, causing both Cesar and Cicero to lose popularity. Wow Platinum convinces Clodio to help her take control of Crassus's fortune, freezing Cesar's bank accounts in the process. Cesar is wounded in an assassination attempt but uses Megalon to heal. Clodio leads protests against Cesar and Cicero that become riots, and Cicero flees to a secret underground bunker. Crassus is forced to step down as bank CEO by the board of directors and supposedly suffers a stroke. Wow Platinum cares for him and makes her plan to finish him for good. For Crassus's sickness is a ruse, he plots to regain control; he attacks Wow and Clodio with a bow and arrow, killing Platinum and wounding Clodio. Confronting protestors at Megalopolis, Cesar gives an impassioned speech about the future and wins the crowd over. The gathered mob turns against Clodio, tying him in harnesses and hanging him upside down above the ground. Crassus pledges to use his wealth to support the construction of Megalopolis. Sometime later, the construction of Megalopolis is completed, with moving walkways and spherical orbs to transport people around the city. Cicero holds Cesar and Julia's baby daughter, Sunny Hope, to a gathered audience, promising to work together with Cesar to continue building a better future. On New Year's Eve, Cesar stops time once more, but only his daughter seems unaffected. Also starring Jason Schwartzman as Jason Zanderz (a member of Cicero's entourage), Poor Things' Kathryn Hunter as Teresa Cicero (Cicero's wife), Dustin Hoffman as Nush Berman (Cicero's fixer), Rocky's Talia Shire as Constance Crassus Catilina (Cesar's mother), Chloe Fineman as Clodia Pulcher, James Remar as Charles Cothope, D. B. Sweeney as Commissioner Stanley Hart, Isabelle Kusman as Claudine Pulcher, and Balthazar Getty as Aram Kazanjian. Driver gives his dullest ever performance, Esposito is reasonable being the lead character's fierce rival, Emmanuel does fine as the daughter of the nemesis, Plaza is alright as the kooky reporter, LeBeouf is the Caligula type character who is an annoying prick (which I surprisingly found sort of funny), Voight as an old fool isn't far off his own reputation, Fishburne just speaks eloquently while Hoffman doesn't do anything(!). Coppola made this "ambitious" film his way on his terms, he hoped to recreate a film like Fritz Lang's Metropolis, with a modern story inspired by the fall of the Roman Empire, about a character clearing city blocks to create a new utopia, and Coppola allowed the actors freedom to improvise. The result is this overlong, confusing, bloated, indulgent, pretentious, dull, and utterly awful nonsense! The script (if there even is one) is full of incoherent rambling with silly Shakespearean, philosophising and political jargon. All the acting talent is wasted with many unlikeable characters and performances, and it feels like things are just being thrown around. The special effects are squandered, the costumed ancient Rome-themed sequences are pointless, the plot is all over the place, and it is so long that over halfway through I was constantly looking at my watch just wanting it to finish! It is no wonder it is the biggest box office flop of recent years for a movie costing over $100 million; don't waste your time with this stupidity, it is a rubbish and utterly boring epic science-fiction drama. Pretty poor!
Never Let Go (2024)
Never Let Go
The Oscar winning star of Monster's Ball, Die Another Day, and the X-Men series has had a mixed career for the last two decades (especially disasters like Catwoman, New's Years Eve, and Movie 43), the trailer for this scary movie looked intriguing and I hoped it would work for her, co-produced by Shawn Levy, produced and directed by Alexandre Aja (The Hills Have Eyes, Piranha, Horns, Crawl). Basically, a woman, known only as Momma (Halle Berry, also producing) and her two young children Nolan (Percy Daggs IV) and Samuel (Anthony B. Jenkins) live in a cabin in a large remote forest. According to Momma, the world was destroyed by a supernatural force known as "The Evil", leaving them as the only survivors. Momma is haunted by visions of supernatural entities that her sons cannot see but believe are real. To prevent the Evil from touching and possessing them, the family must have ropes tied whenever they leave the house, connecting them back to the building. The family only leave to forage and hunt for food. Momma and the boys also chant a daily prayer to give thanks to the house for keeping them safe from the Evil. One day while out foraging, Samuel and Nolan get into an argument, and Nolan steps on Samuel's rope, causing Samuel to get disconnected from his rope and he falls and breaks his ankle. Nolan unties himself to try and help Samuel before they are rescued by Momma. The Evil appears to her in the form of her deceased mother (Kathryn Kirkpatrick), although her children do not see it. Over time, Nolan has started disbelieving his mother's claims, questioning Samuel what he saw, but Samuel dismisses his suspicions. The family are forced to use up a large amount of their stockpiled food during a brutal winter. The cold conditions and lack of sunlight result in them being unable to grow or hunt any new food. Meanwhile, Momma's visions intensify, as she sees visions of her husband and the boys' Poppa (William Catlett), whom she killed, along with their Grandma and Grandpa (Georges Gracieuse). She also has frightening visions of a possessed and mutilated Nolan. Sensing discontent from her sons, Momma tells them about her life before the world ended, in the city with them when they were younger. She then shows them an old Polaroid camera and two photographs she kept, one of herself as a teenager, and one of herself and her two sons. Momma tells them there is one photo remaining in the camera, and they should wait until the right moment to use it. Now fully out of food and forced to eat tree bark, Momma tells them that the meat of Koda, the family dog, is the only thing that will sustain them. Nolan is horrified that she is considering killing the dog and storms out, exclaiming that he hates her and believes that they are not alone. Momma takes the dog into the greenhouse to kill him, although she contemplates changing her mind. But Nolan cuts Momma's rope and locks her inside the greenhouse, hoping she will see the Evil is not real. Instead, Momma encounters the Evil in the form of her mother; Nolan is horrified when she sees his mother kill herself, slitting her own throat with a knife. Samuel finds Nolan holding their dying mother in his arms and blames his brother for her death. As the brothers continue to starve alone, Samuel's behaviour becomes more erratic and threatening. Using the extra length of rope from his mother, Nolan travels further out of the woods. He finds an empty road and calls out for help. Returning to the house, he encounters a Hiker (Matthew Kevin Anderson) who heard his shouting. The hiker becomes concerned for Nolan and approaches, offering him food and to take him to safety. But Samuel appears and threatens the stranger with a crossbow. Although Nolan and the hiker try to calm the situation, Samuel shoots the hiker. Nolan follows the hiker who has fallen to the ground and has called 911 on his smartphone, but he cannot speak due to blood loss. Nolan takes the hiker's backpack filled with food. Nolan tries to convince Samuel that the stranger was trying to help them and offers him the food he has found, but Samuel refuses to listen, believing that he was the Evil trying to get in their heads. That night, a young girl (Cadence Compton) arrives at the property looking for her father, the hiker they encountered and finds Samuel in the greenhouse. Noticing that Samuel has her father's torch, and seeing Momma's body on the ground, she flees. Samuel chases her, and she is revealed to be the Evil, and it manages to touch him. Back at the house, Samuel, now seemingly possessed and exhibiting the same erratic behaviour as Momma, tries to kill Nolan. Samuel sets the curtains alight, causing a fire to spread through the cabin, while Nolan is confronted by the Evil in the form of Momma. Nolan gets into a small crawlspace with his Momma to shelter them from the fire. The Evil sheds Momma's skin to reveal a snake-like creature that dissipates as Nolan hugs it. The fire burns the house down and Samuel takes the last photo with the Polaroid. A rescue helicopter arrives with paramedics carrying Nolan from the house on a stretcher and away to safety. As he is flown away, Nolan sees Samuel by his side who has been rescued as well. The helicopter reaches civilisation, revealing that Momma was lying all along. But the last Polaroid photograph taken reveals that the Evil is touching Samuel on his shoulder. Nolan hears Samuel whisper to him, "She loves me more", revealing that he may still be possessed. Also starring Christin Park as the Medic and Stephanie Lavigne as The Evil. Berry does a good job as the overly protective if highly paranoid mother, and young stars Daggs and Jenkins give terrific performances as her children who have differing opinions of their circumstances. The setup is interesting, having to stay connected to the house via the ropes, and the cabin in the woods location is familiar, but it is not executed well. What could have been a good story of paranoia or a fight against nasty forces in the woods is muddled together and reduced to something lacking grit, I wanted it to be scarier, better scripted, and more committed in its plot, the final twist could mean a follow-up but I don't think they should bother, it is not complete rubbish, it is just a below average disappointing survival horror thriller. Okay!
Crazy, Stupid, Love. (2011)
Crazy, Stupid, Love.
It's fairly rare that others recommend films for me to watch, it's more often that I recommend them to him, but my brother mentioned this one that I had never watched. I knew it had an all-star cast and was rated well, so I was looking forward to it, written by Dan Fogelman (Bolt, Tangled, Danny Collins), from directors Glenn Ficarra and John Requa (I Love You Phillip Morris, Focus, Whiskey Tango Foxtrot). Basically, middle-aged Cal Weaver (Steve Carell, also producing) and his wife Emily (Julianne Moore) are out for dinner when she asks for a divorce. She reveals that she had an affair with his co-worker David Lindhagen (Kevin Bacon). As divorce proceedings begin, it fractures the friendship with neighbour and best friend Bernie Riley (John Carroll Lynch), whose wife Claire (Beth Littleford) despises Cal. After moving into his own apartment, Cal begins frequenting an upscale bar, talking loudly about his marriage ending. At the same bar, Jacob Palmer (Ryan Gosling) is a womaniser who is confident and persuasive, using on-the-nose comments and compliments to seduce women each night and take them to bed. One night, Jacob is rejected by a law school graduate named Hannah (Emma Stone). While Cal is spending time at the bar, his thirteen-year-old son Robbie (Jonah Bobo) is looked after by twenty-something-year-old babysitter Jessica (Analeigh "Lio" Tipton), Bernie's daughter, who he has a crush on. Robbie openly admits he has feelings for her and makes several grand gestures hoping to win her heart. Jacob notices Cal at the bar and takes pity on him; Jacob offers to teach him his techniques to pick up women. This starts with him changing his image, a new expensive wardrobe, and dropping his self-pity commentary talking about the divorce. Cal begins with a few awkward attempts to talk to women. But one night he attracts the attention of a woman named Kate (Marisa Tomei), and he successfully spends a night with her. This experience gives Cal the confidence to seduce other women, alternating his approach between being honest with Jacob's tried and tested example. Eventually, Cal and Emily are reunited at Robbie's parent-teacher conference, where she is impressed by his newfound confidence and fitted clothes. Their reunion goes well until Robbie's teacher is revealed to be Kate, who is angered by his lack of contact and spitefully reveals that she and Cal had sex. In the ensuing argument, Cal inadvertently confesses to having sex with nine women since their separation. Emily is disgusted, she reveals that she is openly dating Lindhagen and leaves. Following another grand gesture by Robbie, Jessica dissuades him after revealing she has a crush on someone else, without revealing it is Cal. She reveals her crush on an older man to a promiscuous classmate, who suggests she should take nude photos of herself, intending to give them to him. Sneaking to the family home, Cal watches Emily, who calls him (unaware he is outside) under the guise of needing help with a light, but he sees through the ruse. Realising that she called because she misses him, Cal decides to win her back. Meanwhile, Hannah in a meeting at her firm assumes her boyfriend Richard (Josh Groban) is standing to announce a proposal, but she is offended when he instead offers her a promotion. She returns to the bar, finds Jacob, and convinces him to sleep with her. Jacob decides to open up to her about his process of seducing women, however, they continue dating and have genuine chemistry, and he develops true feelings for her. Jacob returns Cal's calls, asking for advice about being in a real relationship and meeting his girlfriend's parents. Claire finds the naked photos of Jessica in her clothes drawer, in an envelope addressed to Cal; she shows it to Bernie, and they assume they are having an illicit relationship. Jessica is humiliated and heartbroken seeing that they have found the photos; Bernie furiously drives to Cal's while Jessica follows in her car, as she could not tell him what is really happening. Cal has arranged a makeshift mini golf course in their backyard, with the help of Robbie and his younger sister Molly (Joey King), to surprise Emily and remind her of their first date. This is arranged as a gathering as well, with Jacob showing up with his girlfriend. Cal and Emily are shocked to see it is Hannah who is revealed to be their first child, born following Emily's teenage pregnancy. Cal is appalled that Jacob is dating his daughter and forbids her from seeing him. As they argue, Bernie and Jessica arrive, with Bernie accusing Cal of sleeping with his underage daughter. Jessica cries explaining that they have never been together, but the photos were intended for Cal because she has feelings for him, which upsets Robbie. Lindhagen also arrives on the scene to return Emily's sweater from a previous date. Cal, Jacob, Lindhagen, and Bernie then get into a scuffle. The fight is eventually broken up after the police are called by the neighbours. After things have calmed down, Cal has caused a rift with the family; Emily breaks up with Lindhagen but tells Cal to leave, Robbie reciprocates this, and Hannah leaves heartbroken that Cal will not accept her relationship with Jacob. While Jacob and Hannah's relationship blossoms, Cal returns to the bar dejected. Jacob finds Cal and confesses that he is in love with Hannah and has re-evaluated his life as a result. Cal is happy that he is a changed man but does not approve of the relationship because of his former lifestyle. Jacob has no ill feelings; he expresses his respect for Cal and praises him for being a good father. At the school's graduation ceremony, Cal sits away from Emily and Molly, with Hannah and Jacob sitting together. Robbie has graduated the eighth grade and has been chosen as the salutatorian to address the audience. But Robbie gives a pessimistic speech about how he no longer believes in true love. Cal stops him and recounts his courtship with Emily to the audience, saying that, while he does not know if things will work out, he will never give up and still loves her. Robbie's faith in love and admiration for his father is renewed, and he proudly announces his love for Jessica, and the audience applauds. After the ceremony, Cal gives Jacob and Hannah his blessing. Jessica gives Robbie the envelope containing her nude photos for emotional support. Cal and Emily have a meaningful conversation about their feelings, with Robbie smiling optimistically watching them talk. Also starring Julianna Guill as Madison, Liza Lapira as Liz, Crystal Reed as Amy Johnson, Dan Butler as Cal's Boss, and Reggie Lee as Officer Huang. Carell is terrific as the everyman whose life is turned upside down, Gosling is charming as the good-looking guy with the gift of the gab, Moore is alright as the wife wanting more adventure, Stone is beautiful as the young woman initially immune to Gosling's charms, young Bobo gets his moments as the pubescent boy with unrequited feelings, and Bacon is well cast as the office jerk. This is a brilliantly scripted film, with witty dialogue, some hilarious banter, admirable characters, and amusing situations, it is splendidly performed, and the love stories are genuinely sweet, there are small moments that contrast realism, but overall, I absolutely loved it, a funny and enjoyable romantic comedy drama. Very good!
Good Luck to You, Leo Grande (2022)
Good Luck to You, Leo Grande
I had heard about and seen several pictures and clips of this film, the escorting industry has always been a taboo subject in Great British, the exchange of sexual services for money is legal, and this film challenged to show it, written by Katy Brand. Basically, in a hotel room, retired religious education schoolteacher Nancy Stokes (Golden Globe and BAFTA nominated Emma Thompson) has hired a male sex worker named Leo Grande (BAFTA nominated Daryl McCormack). She is anxious and explains that she was married to her husband for thirty-one years but had an unsatisfactory sex life. Following her husband's death two years ago, Nancy says that she has never had an orgasm, and has vowed never again to fake one. She is insecure about her body and age, and embarrassed to have hired a sex worker to fulfil her needs. But Leo is determined to try to put her at ease. Whilst having a conversation to get to know each other, Leo expresses no shame about sex work but reveals that his mother believes he works on an oil rig. Nancy tells him that she has two children but is disappointed in them, finding his adult son boring and her adult daughter irritating. Her husband was her only sexual partner; he found oral sex demeaning and never tried anything besides missionary sex. Nancy tells Leo about her only sensual experience: as a teenager on a family holiday in Greece, a hotel worker took an interest in her. When they were alone, he started kissing and fingering her before they were interrupted, and she left the following day. Seeing Nancy aroused and relaxed by her own story, Leo kisses and stimulates her. One week later, Nancy meets Leo in the same hotel room for a second session. Although she did not achieve an orgasm previously, she has prepared a bucket list of sexual activities to experience for the first time, beginning with fellatio. Nancy remains anxious, worsened by phone calls from her daughter, Leo helps her relax by dancing and giving her a massage. Fearing that she sacrificed her youth and personal desires for her family, she is overwhelmed after touching a shirtless Leo, who encourages her to embrace her own body. Leo reveals he has a younger brother in the military, they are estranged, and he presumes he also thinks he is an oil rig worker. Wanting to satisfy her urges, Leo suggests Nancy book more sessions, and she accuses him of trying to make more money. He tells her about his other clients, some elderly, some physically disabled, and some just wanting the company. He says that some of them just want to talk, some of them want to dress up and roleplay, and some of them have other unusual requests. But he explains that he obtains genuine pleasure from seeing their pleasure. Nancy sees Leo becoming aroused as he describes his work, which in turn arouses her, and she finally gives him oral. Nancy books Leo for a third session in the same room. He performs oral sex on her, the second item on her list, which she enjoys but does not bring her to orgasm. They have a casual conversation about their personal lives and laugh together. But Leo is stunned when Nancy admits that she knows Leo's real name having looked up the transaction information online. Leo is upset, accusing her of cyberstalking; he tells her not to book him again, threatening to expose her as a client. Nancy speaks his real name, Connor, and suggests they could be friends outside of bookings. She encourages him to tell his family about his work because he previously said he has no shame, and she even offers to speak to his mother. In anger, Leo reveals that his mother tells people he is dead, apparently being aware of his profession, and he storms out. Moments later, Leo returns because he has misplaced his phone, angrily admitting that his mother disowned him when he was a teenager, and leaves. Sometime later, in the hotel's café, Nancy has arranged a fourth session with Leo, hoping to have a conversation. One of the waitresses, Becky (Isabella Laughland), recognises Nancy as her former teacher. Nancy is pleasantly surprised when Leo arrives; he admits he was unsure if he wanted to come. Nancy lies to Becky that Leo is selling her a car. Nancy thanks Leo for her newfound confidence and sexual awakening and has discreetly recommended him to several friends. She reveals her real name is Susan Robinson, which he finds funny ("Mrs. Robinson") and that he is the only true adventure she has ever had. Becky interrupts with a story about Susan shaming her and her school friends for their short skirts, calling them a derogatory term. Leo tells Susan that he decided to tell his brother about his real job, they have reconnected after his brother admitted he had some idea already. He also explains that his mother disowned him when he was fifteen after catching him and several friends having group sex. She is probably unaware of his current work and admits she no longer acknowledges his existence, even walking past him in the street. Susan calls Becky to the table to apologise for her past judgmental behaviour. She also confesses the real relationship between her and Leo, that he is a sex worker, that she has desires, and she recommends his services. Susan and Leo go upstairs to her room and enjoy a final session together. They passionately engage in all the remaining acts on Susan's list, but she has still not achieved an orgasm. Leo gets up to find a sex toy to experiment with, and Susan watches him walk around naked. She masturbates and gives herself her first orgasm. Seeing her satisfied, Susan thanks Leo, telling him this will be their final session. She tells him she does not need him anymore and they part amicably. Leo walks away happy for the future, and Susan looks at herself naked in the mirror and is content with her body. Thompson gives a great nuanced performance as the older widow seeking sexual liberation, and McCormack is charming as the good-looking younger male escort, and the chemistry between them is pleasant and believable. The plot is basic, and it is a slightly stagey mostly one-location film, but it flows nicely because of a witty, assured, and humorous script, the likeable leading characters, and the subject is handled sensitively and well, an enjoyable sex comedy drama. It was nominated the BAFTA for Outstanding British Film of the Year, and for Outstanding Debut by a British Writer, Director, or Producer for Katy Brand. Very good!
Strange Darling (2023)
Strange Darling
A review I read for this film started with the words "the less you know, the better", so I read no further, all I knew was that it was about a one-night stand and a serial killer, I assumed it might be a scary movie, from the positive reviews I was looking forward to whatever it had to offer. Basically, the story is in six non-linear chapters. Chapter 3: in rural Hood River County, Oregon, The Lady (Willa Fitzgerald) is being pursued by the Demon (Kyle Gallner) in his truck. On a rural stretch of road, he shoots at her vehicle, causing her to crash and she flees on foot into the woods. Chapter 5: The Demon arrives at a farmhouse with his rifle and searches for the Lady throughout the house. He shoots at several human-sized containers, calling "Here kitty, kitty"; there is a man dead on the floor, and he steps outside into the garden. Finding several pieces of meat on the grass, he realises the Lady is hiding in the freezer and shoots her in the arm. Chapter 1: The Lady and the Demon are together in a car outside a local motel. Before renting a room, the Lady questions if he is a serial killer, which he denies. She is curious to try hyper-realistic sadomasochistic roleplay, where he pretends to be a murderer, and she is his victim. Chapter 4: two eccentric hippie doomsday preppers, Frederick (Ed Begley Jr.) and Genevieve (Barbara Hershey) are having breakfast together (overfilled with lard and butter). The Lady arrives with her eat missing and bleeding heavily, they assume she is the victim of something horrific. While Genevieve goes to get some medicine for the Lady, Frederick prepares to call the police, but the Lady kills him and forces Genevieve outside. Chapter 2: After hours of roleplaying, the Lady suggests taking cocaine, to which the Demon agrees. The Lady starts acting candidly and denies the Demon sex; she reveals that she has in fact dosed him with ketamine, which renders him severely sedated. It turns out that the Lady is a prolific serial killer herself, called "the Electric Lady", and she carves her initials with a knife on his chest. Searching through his belongings, she discovers a law enforcement badge, revealing that he is a police officer. The Lady prepares to stab the Demon to death, but he regains consciousness and fires his concealed pistol at her, shooting her ear off. The Lady flees the motel while the Demon doses himself with some remaining cocaine to boost his adrenaline. The Lady reaches the reception of the motel, claiming to be in danger, killing one of the women trying to help her. She steals the car keys from desk clerk Tanya (Bianca A. Santos), kills her, and is pursued by the Demon in his truck. Chapter 6: after shooting her in the arm, the Demon handcuffs the Lady to the freezer handle before calling the sheriff Pete (Steven Michael Quezada) and his deputy, Gale (Madisen Beaty), for backup. The Lady tells the Demon she had always wanted to be executed by a firing squad, and tearfully confesses that, during their earlier sexual encounter, she had a moment of true love for him. She then sprays him with a can of Genevieve's bear spray. They have a struggle, during which the Lady bites into the Demon's neck, tearing into his jugular vein, and he bleeds to death. As he dies, she steals his concealed pistol and pulls her trousers down to suggest she was almost raped. Pete and Gale arrive at the house, finding the Lady on the floor cuffed and with her trousers down. She claims the Demon, high on cocaine, kidnapped her and took her to the farmhouse to rape and murder her, unaware that the home was occupied. Pete is sceptical and insists there should be an investigation by the homicide unit before they free her, but Gale convinces him that the Lady should receive immediate medical attention. Epilogue: the officers drive to town with the Lady in the back of the police car. They pass Genevieve at the side of the road, she recognises the Lady, but the Lady shoots her in the head before she can explain what happened. At gunpoint, the Lady forces Gale and Pete to give her their guns before ordering Gale out of the car to run away. Pete drives the Lady further down the road before she tells him to stop so she can think about her next move. When Pete asks her why she kills, she tells him that she sometimes "doesn't see humans, just devils" before shooting him in the head. The Lady stumbles on foot further down the road, when a truck passes and a woman Driver (Sheri Foster) picks her up. The Driver questions what happened, and the Lady does not answer. She pulls out her gun when the driver mentions calling the police, but the driver returns fire, shooting the Lady. The driver calls police from her mobile phone, explaining she just shot a stranger in self-defence, and that she is taking her to hospital. As the driver continues down the road, the Lady looks around, gasping for breath, slowly loses consciousness and dies in the passenger seat. Also starring Denise Grayson as Libby, Duke Mollner as Roughneck, and Eugenia Kuzmina as Beth, with the voices of Jason Patric as the True Crime Narrator, and Giovanni Ribisi (actor turned cinematographer and producer) as Art Pallone. Fitzgerald gives a fantastic performance as the young woman who is not all she appears to be, Gallner is also great as the presumably sinister bloke on a mission, and Hershey and Begley Jr. Have their moments as the odd hippie couple. The film reminded me of a Tarantino movie structure and cleverly navigates the changing dynamics of two characters, wrongfooting you with who to root for and who is the real villain, it is suitably tense with striking moments of violence, and the twist is pulled off well, a terrific thriller. Very good!
Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F (2024)
Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F
Having watched the sequel of Coming to America, made over two decades later, I had mixed opinions about a fourth Beverly Hills Cop movie, made by Netflix; the original is a great movie, while the second and third films are so-so, but I was always going to see the latest instalment. Basically, Detroit police detective Axel Foley (Eddie Murphy) is up to his usual tricks and under the supervision of his friend, Deputy Chief Jeffrey Friedman (Paul Reiser). Axel takes his friend, Detective Mike Woody (Kyle S. More), to a Detroit Red Wings game, where he has spotted looters. He causes costly damage to the city pursuing the group of thieves. To protect Axel from being punished, Jeffrey retires and encourages Axel to reconnect with his estranged daughter Jane Saunders (Taylour Paige), a defence attorney in Los Angeles. Jane is the lawyer in a high-profile case, representing Sam Enriquez (Damien Diaz) who has been framed for the murder of undercover officer Copeland (David Rowden). After she is threatened by criminals, Axel's old friend, former police officer Billy Rosewood (Judge Reinhold), who is now a private investigator and has been helping her, calls and warns Axel that his daughter's life is in danger. After the call, Rosewood recovers evidence from the murder crime scene inside a van but is kidnapped by the cartel. Axel returns to Beverly Hills and is concerned that Rosewood is not responding to his calls. He visits Rosewood's office and finds a suspicious team searching for something. Axel removes a page from Rosewood's personal organiser before the group chases him through Rodeo Drive. Axel is arrested and taken to the Beverly Hills Police Department, where he meets Detective Bobby Abbott (Joseph Gordon-Levitt), Jane's ex-boyfriend. Axel also reunites with John Taggart (John Ashton), who had a falling out with Rosewood, came out of retirement, and is now police chief. Taggart introduces Axel to Captain Cade Grant (Kevin Bacon), whom he mentored as a young police cadet. Axel is untrustworthy of Grant because he is wearing excessively expensive items despite being on a police salary. Jane reunites with her father and bails him out, but she resists his attempts to reconnect with her. They have been estranged for at least two decades; years ago during an investigation of the Detroit mafia, Axel and his family were threatened. Following the threats, Axel stayed in Detroit while Jane and her mother moved to Los Angeles, and eventually, he and Jane's mother divorced. Axel and Jane uneasily work together to follow clues and track Enriquez's movements, and slowly have moments where they do reconnect. They are ambushed on Wilshire Boulevard but saved by Abbott in a shootout. Axel questions Taggart about his leadership and tells his suspicions about Grant. Taggart vehemently defends Grant and his team, shuts out Axel and suspends Abbott. Axel, Jane, and Abbott recover a camera from the car where Copeland was murdered and deduce Grant's team were looking for an SD card containing evidence. The address from Rosewood's organiser is a mansion owned by Grant and used for a cartel money laundering operation. Axel enlists the help of his friend Serge (Bronson Pinchot) to help gain access to the mansion by posing as potential buyers of the property next door. Axel finds more evidence that links to Copeland's murder. Grant is notified of their presence by surveillance. After arguing with Jane, Axel and Abbott seek help from Enriquez's uncle, Chalino Valdemoro (Luis Guzmán), head of the cartel. He tells them that Grant helps protect the cartel and reveals that a drug shipment will leave the port that night. Abbott and Axel are framed by Grant and arrested for drug possession. Axel and Abbott manage to escape custody and they steal a helicopter with Abbott, a former pilot, flying to the Beverly Hills Police Station. Abbott confesses that a traumatic incident means he experiences dizzy spells whilst flying; pursued by Grant, he shoots the rotor, causing them to crash. Taggart witnesses the incident and is convinced of the corruption within his own team. He agrees to help Jane with the pending investigation, but she is later kidnapped by Grant's thugs. Axel and Abbott go to the port and find Rosewood being held there by the cartel. They free him and go to retrieve the SD card Rosewood hid. Grant calls Axel to announce he is holding Jane. Jeffrey returns to aid the group, and they find out Jane has been taken to the cartel mansion. Axel, Rosewood, Abbott, and Taggart engage in a firefight against Grant's cartel army. During the fight, Jane escapes captivity. Axel and Grant face off; Axel is shot while protecting Jane, and Grant is shot in the head by Abbott. In the aftermath, Rosewood and Taggart make peace. With the recovered evidence, the charges against Enriquez are dropped. Axel recovers in hospital with Jane by his side and they reconcile. A few days later, Axel reunites with both Rosewood and Taggart, who are on a stakeout. Axel persuades the two to join him for dinner. Also starring Mark Pellegrino as Beck, Nasim Pedrad as Ashley De La Rosa, Keith Pillow as Captain Radtke, Patricia Belcher as Judge Angelic, Christopher McDonald as the Golfer, and Affion Crockett as the Country Club Valet. Murphy is likeable enough but not as foul-mouthed or cocky and with slightly less swagger, Paige is reasonable as the grown-up daughter, Gordon-Levitt is fine, Bacon does alright as the shady cop, and Reinhold, Ashton and Pinchot returning is fine. The story of corruption in the police is predictable and slow, the father and daughter reunited after years is only slightly interesting, the film relies very heavily on nostalgic throwbacks to the other three films, with returning characters, repeated jokes, and of course the 80s soundtrack (repeating "The Heat Is On" by Glenn Frey in the opening) and the catchy Harold Faltermeyer "Axel F" theme tune, only some high-speed chases and gun battles get your attention, I wanted it to be funnier though, only a reasonable action comedy. Okay!
The Substance (2024)
The Substance
I had seen the trailer for this scary movie a few times, I was most interested to see the star of Ghost and Indecent Proposal back in a leading role (I could only remember her previously in Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle!), it won Best Screenplay at the Cannes Film Festival, and it sounded like an interesting concept, from French director Coralie Fargeat (Revenge). Basically, it opens with the placement of the star of actress Elisabeth Sparkle on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, and the passage of time as it is stepped on, cracks and fades, and things are dropped onto it (this is a metaphor for her career). Elisabeth Sparkle (Demi Moore) is an Oscar winning actress and has hosted a popular aerobics exercise TV show (think Jane Fonda) for decades. It is her fiftieth birthday, and whilst taking a break, she overhears a phone conversation by sleazy studio boss Harvey (Dennis Quaid) that he wants to find younger and more beautiful talent. Harvey takes Elisabeth to lunch, eating shrimp (very noisily and messy, preceding stuff to come!), and tells her that she is being fired. After this, she is driving and sees one of her billboards being taken down, and she has a car accident. Surviving the crash, at the hospital, a young good-looking male nurse (Robin Greer) gives her a flash drive labelled "The Substance", and a note saying, "It changed my life". Returning home, Elisabeth plugs the USB stick into the television, and it plays an advertisement (with the voice of Yann Bean) promoting a black-market drug that, when injected, will unlock your DNA, and release a younger, more beautiful, more "perfect" version of the user, though the two are still connected as one. Initially sceptical about it, she is desperate and decides to call the number and she orders the product. She is given the address to a building with secret access behind a malfunctioning slider door, enters a white room with safe deposit boxes, and uses a plastic card to open and take her product. It is a cardboard box containing a single-use serum "Activator" with instructions to follow, needles, tubes, and containers. In the bathroom, Elisabeth strips naked and injects the product, and a younger version of herself is born, tearing Elisabeth's back apart and sending her into a comatose. The younger form (Margaret Qualley) is stunned by herself in the mirror, having a slimmer figure, bigger rounder breasts, and a bigger rounded butt. Reading the instructions, the younger form sees she must sew up Elisabeth's back and inject herself with a "Stabilizer" serum extracted from the unconscious Elisabeth each day. The process is that the new form will live in the world for seven days, while the comatose original will be fed with packed food, liquids, and nutrients. Then after seven days, the original Elisabeth will revive, and the new form will be unconscious, feeding and stabilized. This process of switching bodies is repeated and must be carried out weekly; the instructions make it clear it is "without exception". The younger form, adopting the name "Sue", reads a newspaper advertisement and is hired back onto Elisabeth's old show. She is hired by Harvey, agreeing a contract on the terms that she works every other week. At Elisabeth's apartment, she also builds a hidden room behind the wall of the bathroom to hide the comatose Elisabeth (or herself) inside for the week. Sue gains popularity on the show from her radiance and sexiness (many close-ups of her bum), quickly ascending to new heights of fame and admiration. When Elisabeth returns after switching, she struggles with her own inadequacy, loneliness, and low self-esteem; she spends most of her time watching television, eating junk food, and looking at Sue's billboard across the street. One day, to boost her self-worth, Elisabeth calls a school friend she previously reacquainted briefly with, Fred (Edward Hamilton-Clark), and asks to go to dinner. However, as she prepares for the date, she is unsure about her makeup, dress, and general image. Wanting to be as "perfect" as Sue, she becomes enraged trying to make herself beautiful, and in the end, she does not go out. As Sue's success grows, she longs to have more time for herself, including nights out, photo opportunities, and lovers. Sue takes advantage and takes extra "Stabilizer" from Elisabeth. This causes severe side effects and consequences for Elisabeth as she ages rapidly. Elisabeth debates stopping the process, but seeing how successful her counterpart has become, she cannot stop. At a café, Elisabeth encounters an elderly man (Christian Erickson) who recognises her for using The Substance; she realises that the young male nurse at the hospital is his younger counterpart. Eventually, Elisabeth is reduced to a haggard, elderly woman due to Sue's addiction. Sue is invited to host a highly anticipated live New Year's Eve special; she extracts enough Stabilizer for three months. Seeing her deterioration and angry with Sue's selfishness, Elisabeth decides finally to stop the process and calls for a termination. As the event approaches, Sue runs out of Stabilizer and is forced by the supplier to switch back to Elisabeth. To her horror, Elisabeth is now a hairless and deformed hunchback. Elisabeth disguises herself in heavy clothing to obtain the serum to eliminate Sue. However, still yearning to feel admiration, she stops the injection at the last second and revives Sue, causing their connection to sever and they become separate beings. Upon seeing the near-empty termination serum, Sue reacts violently and attacks Elisabeth. Near death, Elisabeth is unable to defend herself because of her aged state; she is beaten to death by Sue before she leaves to host the New Year's Eve show. However, due to Elisabeth's death, Sue cannot stabilize herself. She finds her front teeth falling out and realises she is rapidly deteriorating. In a bid to save herself, Sue rushes back to the apartment and injects herself with the disposed leftover Activator, hoping to create a new version of herself. Instead, she inadvertently creates "Monstro Elisasue" (Qualley), a grotesque hybrid of the two, with limbs, eyes, teeth, boobs, and all sorts all over the place, and the original Elisabeth's face gasping (unable to speak) on its back. Despite this, Elisasue attempts to disguise herself and goes to the live broadcast. She is eventually revealed to a shocked audience (with Richard Strauss's "Thus Spoke Zarathustra" playing), and a random breast is produced and drops from an eye socket. The horrified spectators erupt into violent chaos, culminating in the hybrid's head getting decapitated. The head is grotesquely regenerated, gushing with blood and the audience is drenched as it spews all over the place. Monstro Elisasue manages to escape and limps outside before collapsing and explosively falling apart onto the street. From the pile of entrails, the original Elisabeth's face emerges as a blob, crawling toward her neglected star on the Walk of Fame. Elisabeth finds solace by positioning herself on the star and gazing at the night sky before melting away. The next day, her remains are cleaned up by a passing floor scrubber. Also starring Gore Abrams as Oliver, Hugo Diego Garcia as Diego, Oscar Lesage as Troy, Phillip Schurer as Mr. Scream, Joseph Balderrama as Craig Silver, Akil Wingate as the Talk Show Host, Tiffany Hofstetter as the Stylist, Viviane Bossina as Sue's Assistant, and Daniel Knight as the Casting Director. Moore gives a terrific performance as the older woman (or "Matrix") desperate to reinvent herself at whatever the cost, Qualley is marvellous as her fitter younger equivalent with a less-than-perfect side, and Quaid gets his moments as the obnoxious perverted producer. The plot involving a cell-replicating substance that offers body perfection is a clever poke at the modern ideals of society and the industries that fetishize flesh and make it a saleable commodity, and it makes a point about unrealistic beauty standards and the obsession with women's bodies; it also works as a Jekyll and Hyde story with young and old versions at war with each other. It has great performances, great imagination, great direction, great sound design, and a great score by Raffertie. But more than anything, it is a movie unafraid to push the boundaries with its David Cronenberg style gross, gory makeup and effects (it's like The Fly, but much more extreme), it has some gnarly early scenes, then goes gloriously disgusting, and by the third act it is one of the most insane, over-the-top and unforgettable things ever created (up there with Mother!, a proper mindf***), at one point I laughed at its outrageously bloody scenes. You need a strong stomach to watch it, but I absolutely loved it; it is easily my favourite scary movie of the year, a brilliant satirical body horror. Very, very good!
Lady Chatterley (1993)
Lady Chatterley
Lady Chatterley's Lover by D. H. Lawrence is one of the most famous and controversial romantic novels of all time, it has been adapted for television and film several times, I had heard about this TV serial version, and I was glad when it was repeated, directed by Ken Russell (Women in Love, The Devils, Tommy). Basically, Lady Constance "Connie" Chatterley (Joely Richardson) is married to British soldier Sir Clifford Chatterley (James Wilby) and lives with him at his family's estate. Clifford leaves to fight in the First World War, and whilst he is away, Connie encounters their tough-yet-quiet groundskeeper, Oliver Mellors (Sean Bean). When Clifford returns, he has been crippled and is wheelchair-bound, and it becomes clear that, although she denies it, she is unhappy and needs love. She becomes attracted to Mellors and eventually, they begin a steamy affair, awakening her sexual urges that she cannot fulfil with her husband. But Connie finds her relationship with Mellors difficult because of their class differences, his attitude, and her guilt for betraying Clifford. In the end, the affair is discovered, and they all have to deal with the consequences. Also starring Shirley Anne Field as Mrs. Bolton, Hetty Baynes as Hilda, Ken Russell as Sir Michael Reid, Lady Chatterley's father, and Brian Blessed as Petty Officer. The performances of Richardson, Bean, and Wilby are all good, the examination of the class system and the relationship stuff is interesting, the costumes and locations are all well done, and the adult material (nudity and sex scenes) all gained attention, with 12 million viewers at the time, overall, it a most worthwhile period romantic drama. It was number 46 on The 100 Greatest Sexy Moments. Very good!
Stalag 17 (1953)
Stalag 17
I recognised the title, I found this movie featured in sixteen of the IMDb Top 250 lists since 1996, I thought it must be good if loads of users have voted for it for several years, written, produced, and directed by Oscar nominated Billy Wilder (Sunset Boulevard, Ace in the Hole, Some Like It Hot, The Apartment). Basically, set in December 1944, in a German prisoner-of-war camp named Stalag 17, 630 American airmen (all sergeants) are being held in one of its compounds, Barracks 4. The compound is overseen by camp warden Oberst von Scherbach (Otto Preminger), and their appointed barracks chief is "Hoffy" Hoffman (Richard Erdman), aided by security officer Frank Price (Peter Graves). The men of Barracks 4 arrange for the escape of fellow airmen Manfredi (Michael Moore) and Johnson (Peter Baldwin). The pair are shot dead during their attempt and their comrades believe there is an informant amongst them. Sergeant JJ Sefton (Oscar winning William Holden) is the prime suspect because he openly trades with the German guards for various luxuries. He also creates profitable ventures to distract the men from the mundanity of camp life, including gambling, brewing their own alcohol, and a makeshift telescope to spy on the Russian women in the neighbouring compound. Clarence "Cookie" Cook (Gil Stratton Jr.), who narrates the story, serves as Sefton's naive and loyal aide. The men of Barracks 4 try to maintain their sanity, including enduring the antics of Stanislaus "Animal" Kuzawa (Oscar nominated Robert Strauss) and Harry Shapiro (Harvey Lembeck) who joke around, and listening to a smuggled radio for war news updates. Their jovial guard, Johann Sebastian Schulz (Sig Ruman), secretly retrieves hidden messages and communicates with signals between himself and the informant. Just before Christmas, a recently captured Lieutenant James Dunbar (Don Taylor) is assigned to Barracks 4 until he can be sent to an officers' camp. Sergeant Bagradian (Jay Lawrence), who accompanies Dunbar, reveals that Dunbar rigged a time bomb in transit and blew up a munitions train. Tension brews between Sefton and Dunbar, as Sefton recognises him from officers' school and believes he only passed because of his privileged family. Schulz announces that an inspector from the Geneva Convention will arrive, and Sefton bribes the guards to let him spend the day with the Russian women. Schulz later confiscates the radio. Concluding that Sefton was rewarded for revealing the radio, the men confront him when he returns, but Sefton denies his responsibility. Von Scherbach interrupts to arrest Dunbar as a saboteur. Sefton is blamed for this by the men and is brutally beaten. The next day, the inspector from Geneva arrives with Red Cross parcels, including 2,000 ping-pong balls, which the prisoners use to create smoke bombs. The inspector is told about the removal of Dunbar, and he warns von Scherbach that it must be proven that Dunbar is guilty. Von Scherbach hands Schulz a hidden message to be delivered to the informant. On Christmas Eve, Price finds the hidden message and then resets the signal. Sefton, recovering from his beating, notices this and becomes suspicious. Price gets Bagradian to reveal how to create a time bomb like Dunbar did: a lit cigarette tucked into a matchbook. That night, an air raid siren forces the men to evacuate. Sefton hides and witnesses Price speaking German to Schulz and demonstrating the time bomb as evidence against Dunbar. On Christmas Day, the SS arrive to take Dunbar to Berlin. While Hoffy has Price guard Sefton (who is still believed to be the informant), he gathers the men to rescue Dunbar. The guards are distracted by a riot and an ignited smoke bomb, and Dunbar is taken to hide in a water tower until nightfall. After von Scherbach threatens to tear down the camp, the men of Barracks 4 decide that one of them must help Dunbar escape. Price volunteers and Sefton finally accuses him of being a German spy. Sefton interrogates Price and reveals the messaging system he used. The men are convinced that Price is the informant, and he tries to flee but is quickly restrained. Anticipating a generous reward, Sefton decides to rescue Dunbar. The prisoners throw Price out with cans tied to his leg, the noise attracts the spotlight, and he is gunned down by the guards. Sefton and Dunbar escape amidst the chaos. The prisoners return to their bunks, and Cookie whistles "When Johnny Comes Marching Home". Also starring Neville Brand as Duke, and William Pierson as Marko the Mailman. Holden gives a good performance, Preminger is interesting as the German officer, and there is good support from Strauss, Lembeck and others. I will be honest and say that I wanted it to be more like The Great Escape or The Wooden Horse, I wanted more emphasis on an escape attempt, but I suppose the story involving a snitch among the POWs is alright, it was certainly well performed, it captures the claustrophobia of the situation, and there are some amusing bits, overall, it is a worthwhile war drama. Very good!
Lee (2023)
Lee
I'd known about this biopic film for a few months, mainly because of its leading actress and the true-life subject matter, and I found out it took eight years to make, due to various delays (the COVID-19 pandemic obviously) and funding issues, I was looking forward to it. Based on the true story, in the 1930s, American middle-aged Lee Miller (Kate Winslet, also producing) is a former fashion model looking to move on in photography. Her partner Roland Penrose (Alexander Skarsgård) is fighting in the military, and she lives with his friend, David E. Scherman (Andy Samberg). She manages to secure a job at Vogue magazine, with British editor Audrey Withers (Andrea Riseborough) overseeing her work. Wanting to show readers the truth about events during the Second World War, Lee wants to travel to war-torn France on the frontline, but she is refused. However, with her American heritage, she can travel and manages to stay at a British camp with the troops. Joining a troop during raids, she risks her life during the bombings and ignores orders from commanding officers to stay back. Lee captures important and moving images of soldiers injured and dying in combat, the medical staff looking after them, and in the war zones the soldiers in the buildings during bombings and the wreckage afterwards. One day, whilst exploring buildings after the bombings, Lee encounters her former friend Solange D'Ayen (Marion Cotillard) who is hiding. Hearing about the horrific events of the Holocaust, she joins a group of soldiers travelling to a concentration camp. Lee is horrified by the thousands of dead bodies, all victims of the atrocities of the Nazis, but takes photographs and sends them to Britain. Unfortunately, these images are not featured in the latest edition of the magazine. Lee is upset, but the editor explains that she fought for them because they are historically important. One of the last famous images captured by Lee is following the death of Nazi leader Adolf Hitler. She ends up in the apartment where he was hiding and committed suicide and takes a photograph of herself naked in Hitler's bathroom. It goes forward in time to the 1970s where the elderly Lee is being interviewed by Antony Penrose (Josh O'Connor) about the events of the war, her work, her photographs, and her personal life. Also starring Noémie Merlant as Nusch Éluard, Arinzé Kene as Major Jonesy, Vincent Colombe as Paul Éluard, Patrick Mille as Jean D'Ayen, Samuel Barnett as Cecil Beaton, Zita Hanrot as Ady Fidelin, and James Murray as Colonel Spencer. This was a passion project for Winslet, she gives a remarkable performance as the real-life war correspondent who witnessed and captured the most disturbing imagery during the conflict, and there is good support from Riseborough, Samberg, Skarsgård, and Cotillard. The photographs are shocking, powerful and historically important from World War II, there are tense scenes of bombings and the horrifying death camps, and the personal story of the woman behind the camera is worthwhile as well, a visually striking and interesting biographical wartime drama. Very good!