Reviews
The English Patient (1996)
The best film of all time.
Now let me start by balancing my review :P This film isn't perfect, the story is pretty slow in parts, not so much the first time you watch it but after that there's bits that take a long time to add little value to the film. Also let me say I'm not some art student, fan of art-house films or anything other than a normal movie goer so I don't really understand people using big words to review a film.
However I am happy to say that this is the best film of all time. I've watched a lot of films to the point where I've almost run out, I've worked my way through other peoples lists of 'best films of all time ever' and gave them a fair chance. But this film is fantastic! The reason why I like it is very soft I'm afraid, it's such a raw depiction of how real relationships happen. You become completely immersed in the unspoken desires of the core characters, you *will* the relationship to unfold and if something goes wrong you're screaming "NNNNOAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGHHHH". You can imagine times that the same thing has happened to you but your life did/did not pan out like that.
Ralph Feinnes does what he does best, plays a reserved Englishman masking incredibly intense emotions as best he can. In other films it's not appropriate and you can see that his range is quite narrow but here he slots in perfectly. Kristin Scott Thomas does exactly the same with flair. Everything else about the film is technically perfect. If you haven't seen this film then you're missing something special.
Takers (2010)
An aimless miss mash of copied ideas
This film is pretty bad. I cant think of a single thing good about this film and I love movies. Lets start with the cast, matt dillon has been great recently but his character has no back story, hes a determined cop with no obvious motivation. On the evil side of the plot none of the actors have enough time on screen to shine as individuals. Paul walker and idris elba can carry a film but mixed in with musicians doing cameos they completely lose their shine. The film moves quickly offering no back story to any character and the most shallow of motivations for most of them, so quickly that you cant follow or maintain interest in the plot. The heist parts of the plot are lifted from numerous other films, die hard, Italian job 2002 remake etc. Its hard to believe they managed to produce not much from so much potential. The icing on the cake is idris elba not being able to manage an English accent despite being from London.
Margot at the Wedding (2007)
Powerful, complex and funny
Any attempt I make to describe this film isn't going to do it justice, in short: if you like dark and powerful films then watch this, you won't regret it. In long: I was bored so I watched this with 0 hype on cable. I watch 1-2 films per day almost every day but I was completely blown away by how powerful the screenplay is on this film. It features Nicole Kidman, someone who wasn't on my radar of good actresses and Jack Black - a slapstick comedian, what on earth was I suppose to expect here? The reality is that the screenplay for this film could be performed by a twig alongside a slice of apple pie and the twig would win an Oscar. It's an extremely dark depiction of a relatively normal event, a wedding, through the interactions of half a dozen flawed adults and the three children that they drag, kicking and screaming, through childhood.
The writers really paint the complexity of everyday people, these aren't people that have extreme mental disorders - these are people you work with that often find themselves thrust together and bound by the most semantic of bonds, family, friends, marriage. Nicole Kidman blew me away as 'Margot', arguably the most flawed of the characters but by no means the protagonist or villain. Jack Black really suppressed his usual over-the-top slapstick to give a subtle performance of a serious character.
I was watching avidly until the end which was like a punch in the face. I mean in the middle of a scene it just says 'Fin'. This film should have been twice as long as it was! Maybe I was just so into the film that I didn't want it to end, either way I make it an 85 minute film when I wished it was over 2 hours.
Catwoman (2004)
Bad in many ways
Often you watch a film and think "This sucks so hard that I don't know where to start" but with Cat-woman the errors are glaringly obvious and easy to break down.
1) The score, the first thing that hits you when watching this film is that the score is completely inappropriate. The timing is off, it will kick in while someone is talking and kick in with heavy rock music when a couple is on a date. When someone takes their jacket it off it will sound like the final scene from cliffhanger before a much more uneventful scene. If there was any chance of immersing the viewer in this film, the score was the final straw.
2) The choreography, I'd like to think for Halle Berrys sake that someone else told her to move and walk like that when she is in 'cat-woman' mode. (In my opinion) The way cat-woman walks is not provocative, confident and carefree... it looks silly and ruins any chance of cat-woman being a decent protagonist.
3) This history of cat-woman. I'm not a marvel/batman expert so I don't know much about this but I do know that Michelle Pfeiffer in Tim Burtons Batman universe... well she rocked as an incredibly dark and mentally disturbed cat-woman. The 'sex in the city' cat-woman created in this film just doesn't paint the same sortof picture at all and anyone over the age of 25 will remember Michelle Pfeiffers cat-woman well. While I'm at it, there are strange undertones to the dialogue when explaining cat-woman in the film, like instead of just making someone that goes a bit crazy and gets bitten by a cat they start trying to make a statement about how a woman behaves without hibitions. All a bit too much for me.
4) The CGI. CGI is heavily used in this film, every single time the cat-woman does something that would seem inhuman they revert to a CGI version of Halle Berry in costume - OK, fair enough. Problem: The CGI isn't high quality enough for the close ups, they zoom right into the face of the fake Halle Berry asif to make it as obvious as possible that you're watching something that isn't real. Six years later they're just about got a believable Jeff Bridges in Tron 3D, why at that time they thought to do this I don't know. The over use of CGI continues with the use of over-zoomed shots and at one point even a CGI ferris wheel. Minutes later they use a real life version of the same ferris wheel, all seems a bit strange to me.
5) The acting. There are some good actors in this film but I found the acting to be unbelievable, there was chemistry between Halle Berry and the detective but little believability to their characters in my opinion.
A lot of films could take one of those 5 points and continue but cat-woman didn't have a chance. I made it an hour into the film but really felt asif every scene was ruined by one of my five points.
4/10.
The Weather Man (2005)
What a gem!
This is a fantastic film! I had never heard of it 'til it hit cable and really enjoyed it. Nicholas Cage has done some (in my opinion) lame films recently so I stopped watching things with him in but this is an exceptional performance by him. Michael Cane is also fairly good as a supporting actor. The film has a great combination of dark and warm themes with some excellent comedy in. The themes mainly revolve around relationships, family and career success addressing how hard it is to balance all three from the eyes of a man that has got it completely wrong for the last decade. The film is an incredibly funny and grim account of how 'the weatherman' tries to reincorporate his children and ex-wife into his immensely successful life. There is a lot of comedy around how local celebrities are treated and a lot of laugh-out-loud moments. Nicholas Cage isn't a comedian but he executes the writing well and reacts excellently to the jokes that he is the but of. 8/10
The Human Centipede (First Sequence) (2009)
Just a good film
It's interesting to see other peoples reactions to the film and how much some people expected from the film. It's as simple as it looks - it's a horror film about what happens when someone with the medical skills sets his mind to joining 3 people together a**-to-mouth. That's it, it's not a thriller, it's not a comedy, it's not a drama, to my knowledge it wasn't even marketed so it would be unfair to claim that it was hyped or has misleading marketing. As with all horror it's subjective, if you're the sort of person that spots errors in 'paranormal activity' or 'blair witch' instead of allowing yourself to be engorged in emoting with the main characters.... well you're not going to like centipede. Personally I found it horrifying to imagine, for two hours, how I would feel if I was part of a human centipede and in that situation. I'm not particular to gore or a lack of it, the gore amount was just right for me, enough to make me turn away but quickly turn back in interest. I don't know anyone that has watched the film and disliked it, I just know people that refuse to watch it so give it a try.
The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (2010)
The weaker of the three films
I haven't read the books but I was definitely disappointed with how little happens in this film. I saw all 3 films in a day and the first 2 were fairly fast paced and entertaining but for a film that sells itself as a romance novel *nothing* happens in it. There are some action scenes and some fairly impressive CGI werewolves but they still cut away a lot of the time when a vampire does something that would involve CGI which makes you wonder what they spent their $65M budget on. I was also pretty fraustrated with the constant swaying of the plot, its obvious whats going to happen at the end of the film but it goes backward and forward treating the viewer like a bit of an idiot. Honestly you could skip this film, knowing that theirs a fourth coming out next year I'd just wait for that.
Miss March (2009)
Quite a clever little 'harold and kumar' movie
I thought this was quite a good film that has a lot of lasting smiles. Its hard for me to quote the film without giving half of it away or frankly cursing :P The trailer doesn't do it much justice, it covers some of the mildly funny moments but the important thing to bear in mind about this film is it's not just a load of boobie jokes, the humour is really clever. Don't get me wrong, if you hate dirty jokes then you'll probably hate this film but it's definitely on par with American pie in terms of: quality - well set up humour, a meaningful if slow plot, sexual humour that demeans the men making it. It's virtually impossible to describe this film in more than 3 words: Just plain funny :)
The Reader (2008)
A wonderful surprise!
Who knew that a film called 'The Reader' would be a controversial film about paedophilia in post Nazi Germany. I suppose its like being surprised that 'The English Patient' isn't completely shot in a hospital. I'm a big fan of Ralph Feinnes, I may never have watched this film if he wasn't in it. I mean seriously it's called 'The Reader' - reading is not the most stimulating of activities when you're doing it so why make a blockbuster about someone else doing it!? But wrong I was, this is the most gut wrenching, thought provoking roller-coaster I have watched this year. It tackles two of the most sensitive topics imaginable with a completely unbiased brush only bent on telling a compelling and emotional story. If you like that sort of cold-but-true Ralph Feinnes film where nobody really conveys emotion but the emotions that are implied rip you out of your seat then you will love this film. Not much here for people that don't like romantic dramas but so much for people that do! The TV guide listed this as 'the performance of winslets career' and that is completely correct, immediately you're not looking at the lady that was in Titanic any more, she blows you out of the water. No bad acting all round really but everyone else has a pretty easy ride compared to winslets character.
Outlander (2008)
Get ready to turn your brain off
This film is supposedly based in the bronze age where everyone speaks nordic, of course this wouldn't make a very good western film so everyone speaks upperclass English. The protagonist of the film isn't from earth so he speaks with a more Scottish American accent. I could let this much go but half way through the film all character depth is completely disgarded and new characters start having American names. All the technology within the film is quickly lost or thrown away within the first 10 minutes, either to keep the budget down or slow the pace of the plot. It's not a bad film, it has a nice gory atmosphere and a lot of genuine viking aspects but the heavy periods of just completely disregarding the authenticity of the period really ruin the immersion. The fact that they chose a monster that looks cool in the dark but never appears in full light really adds to the feel that this film got a budget way below what it deserved. You'd expect this from a 'Sci Fi Special' but a fully fledged box office film written in this way just seems below par.
Wall Street (1987)
Timeless classic
Despite the fact that this film, at the time of writing, is 23 years old and features mobile phones 10x the size of todays - the values and points that it tries to convey are so timeless. I'm not the sort of person that takes anything more than enjoyment from a film but it's hard not to take a ride with the main character and learn the same lessons that he does. Charlie Sheen is excellent as the main character and Martin Sheen really provides the grounding to a film that wouold otherwise sweep you off into the distance. When it comes down to it Michael Douglas can be a pretty soul-less actor that really sets the negative tone of the film, playing the bad guy stock broker. All round fantastic young performances by David Spade and Dr.Cox from Scrubs provide a supporting cast that gives depth and solidity to all the characters. The only thing boring about the film is the predictability of the ending and the way the pace really slows down, you know the ending 15 minutes before it happens but the lead up to it is a fantastic film.
Boiler Room (2000)
A very very very good film
I'll sum this film up in 5 words, 'on par with fight club'.
This is a great film, every second of this film is worth 9/10. I'll start with the films flaws. Firstly, the main character is very weak, I'm not sure whether it's poor writing or bad acting but he just comes across as an idiot rather than the deep, flawed, entrepreneur that the film wanted to portray. Secondly, even in the year 2,000 floppy disks were an ageing technology, without giving much away there's a scene where an entire companies data is copied to a floppy disk. The film includes a lot of central characters and doesn't provide any back-story for any of them, this wouldn't be so much of a problem if the central character wasn't so weak but by the end of it you feel as though you haven't seen a single character develop or even begin to understood any of the characters but you have just seen a good film.
Praise: This film is amazing. The film really captures the desires of society and gives them a face. The characters really convey the shallow two facedness you come across every day where they're happy and pleasant until something happens that could even remotely damage their cash flow. Every person you've ever met that wanted to make a quick buck is in this film, the consumerism and lack of social conscience that constantly plagues society is so prevalent in this film. It also approaches the topic of share trading from a much more accessible angle, they don't put much effort into adding the right industry terms or showing scenes of the NY stock exchange - they show the consequences of share trading, the lack of understanding of the average consumer and give you a better understanding of where the money comes from. If you're anything like me then this film takes you on a ride where you are the main character every step of the way until finally you return to life with a much deeper understanding of the desires people succumb to in modern society. This film includes very young appearances by a lot of famous actors, Ben Affleck, Vin Diesel etc. who all pull their weight to give life to the film. I'm explaining the film in a very stale way but I can't help it, it's on par with 'fight club' - you can't explain why the film is good in a way that does it justice, just watch 2 hours of cinema that will improve your quality of life.
Babel (2006)
A very powerful and thought provoking film
I have one criticism of this film and I'm gonna get it out of the way first, their portrayal of Morrocco was a bit off. It's a very friendly country and although crime is common as with any low GDP country - you would not have a panic attack stuck in a Morrocon town for a few hours. Also it's much more built up than they give it credit for - I went on a 2 day tour there and we stopped in a lot of cafes with branded ice cream, kitchens and toilets, the scene at the start where they're sitting in outdoor tents is very misleading, I never saw anyone using makeshift outdoor tents in the time I was there. They skim over their mis-portrayal of it late in the film where they return to Marakesh and you realise how built up it really is.
This was a really good film, right from the start the storytelling style made me really excited to keep watching it. Ignore the 'poo pooers' who claim that the storyline seems disjointed, I'm guessing they didn't finish the film. Their portrayal of what it would be like to be a teenage deaf girl was really enlightening and the way they show so many different worlds in one film just instantly opens your eyes. The stars don't dominate the film, they're just characters in one of the story lines so the film should still be watchable if you happen to dislike one of them. The number of issues the film addresses and the loneliness you feel to emphasise with the characters just draws you in and keeps you glued to the screen. 9/10 well deserved.
Louis, Martin & Michael (2003)
He should have just called it a day on this one
I'm really into Lous Theroux interviews and this must be the 10th-15th that I've watched this week. Saying that, this is the worst I've seen. He just gets nothing that hasn't been seen before. He gets Joe Jackson at 2am saying 'Yes' to a few closed questions. You know what, at 2am, after a long day, if a few questions stood between me and going to bed, I would agree that aliens were my parents and that I poop ice cream every time I see clowns. He seems to spend a lot of time going at Uri Geller because Uri wouldn't give him an interview with Michael, his reason was that Louis has a negative and manipulative interview style - that statement should have been the end of the episode. He continued to rip into everyone he met from then on, getting almost nothing in comparison to the Bashir interview. This is still a mildly amusing show, the sweet fantastic irony that Bashir was chosen over Louis because Bashir was offering a positive interview, its fantastic to watch. Maybe at the time there was something unique about Joe Jackson being a jackass but he's gone on to do dozens of interviews where he seems quite normal, if cold.
Paranormal Activity (2007)
Truly terrifying
-- Quick introduction about my review --
I found this film to be truly terrifying. I'm a male in his mid- twenties, quite into horror films and have watched them frequently recently. There are a lot of reviews slamming this film by people angry that there was hype surrounding it. It's just a film. I don't watch a lot of TV, I'd seen the trailer maybe 3 times in the cinema and had not discussed this film with anyone other than the person I went to see it with. If the viewing experience of this film depends on your cynicism, the amount of hype you're exposed to and the atmosphere around you then my angle is: - I'm a very cynical person, I complain constantly and expect masterpieces when I go to the cinema. - I was exposed to limited hype but understood this to be a popular film that looked promising. I understood nothing more than the trailer and queue sizes of the cinema before viewing this film. - I was nearly late to the performance and was in a packed cinema full of people chatting until the film started. The crowd were very animated, constantly gasping, screaming and commenting loudly during the film.
-- My Review --
My experience of this film is one that I'll never forget. The actors gave a truly spine chilling performance that gives me goosebumps when I recall any scene from the film. The plot is really well managed, it's an uphill roller-coaster that constantly plays with the audience but never letting them loose. The effects leave nothing to be desired, they were perfect for the film and you would never guess that this was a low budget film, in fact you end up thinking 'They did all that with how much?'. The low actor count creates an appropriate feeling of isolation that complements the film.
The film contains no music but it has a lot of sound effects and ambient sounds. I think music would have ruined the atmosphere they worked so hard to create. The main actress gives a really mind blowing performance, there is no point that you doubt her performance in a truly challenging role. The film is truly compelling to the point where I had to keep reminding myself, 'its not real' and make a conscious effort to distance myself. The film deals really well with your own scepticisms about the paranormal and the characters take up opposing views on the argument to leave you to make up your own mind.
-- A Warning --
Personally I think it's really undersold that this film is terrifying. I really would warn people to understand this before seeing it. You may find that you are one of those people that feel bored during this film but if it stimulates you in the correct way ... well my heart was pumping so hard I started to get worried.
Friday Night Lights (2006)
Much deeper than it could be
It's pretty obvious that Friday night lights is in direct competition with the likes of One Tree Hill and the O.C but it exceeds all expectations to bring such a well rounded show that transcends age. The twists and turns of the plot are real problems that affect well drawn characters, my greatest criticism of other teen shows would be the ridiculousness of the plot - someone always needs to die or commit a haeneous crime but FNL sticks to real plots. The plots revolve around how the characters interact, even the most mediocre of plot variations can bring about a really interesting array of character reactions. The writers have really captured the dramatic element of the human condition, the town revolves around a football coach and his wife who reach beyond the norm to bring out the best of those around them. Even though most characters never even commit a crime there's still a real feeling of good and evil as you realise how misguided the intentions of some characters are and they never stray too far from people that you've met in real life.
The mock-amateur camera style really brings home the realistic feel of the show, the cast are all relatively unknown but some of them are absolutely fantastic actors and actresses. There are a lot of central characters and they all get deep plots that show both sides of the personality. I have nothing but praise for Friday night lights, the first show I've seen that captures every aspect of the human condition.
Flatland (2007)
Surprisingly poiniant
This is a great film with a lot of strong philosophy weaved in, I'm not surprised to find that there is a great book behind this film. The central plot for the film is a 2D world and two factions within it. Right from the start of the film you are bombarded with parallels to reality and its hard not to get distracted by your own thought chain, in a good way :) The CGI is as good as it needs to be to tell this story, the yellow sphere that you'll have seen if you've read this far is a bit misleading - the film has its own unique style that extends further than such basic geometry and reflections. The actors voice overs are quite good, the film isn't amateur and there is a lot of narration to help the story along.
My main criticism of the film would be an excess of narration - sometimes its useful but other times its downright patronising and by the end you end up sighing every time you see narration.
Just Shoot Me! (1997)
Hit and miss but the Hits are amazing
I've watched a lot of sitcoms and this is definitely something special. The actors really blend, love what they do and are armed with lightning fast dialogue! Saying that, the episodes walk a very fine line heavily relying on inter-episode in-jokes and stereotypes that sometimes fall short of funny. The show tries very hard to build relationships, especially between the daughter and father which can be the basis for some of the more boring episodes. The funny episodes are the completely absurd spin-offs such as season 3 episode 5 "Two girls for everyone" where Finch attempts to arrange a threesome. This show really boils down to if you're watching it on DVD or not, jumping from a serious episode to a funny episode is essential else you'll find it hard to stay into the show.
Captain Mike Across America (2007)
Just add content
This film just feels like one long anti-bush rally, it is quite literally his city-to-city tour with no new revelations or any attempt to even break up the rally footage. There's tonnes of long performances by singers I'm not too familiar with and liking these singers is the only time I can see someone liking this film. After the first 15 minutes you'll see why this film is free. The timing seems convenient too, I was wondering why he held onto this film for a full term but it seems apparent that he's trying to use it to influence the 2008 election. If you're an American voter that's already anti-bush then you may enjoy this but it has 0 entertainment value.
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
Hit and miss but generally comedy gold
When this show is funny its REALLY funny, the entire of season one had me in stitches. Now its not for everyone, its blatantly filling the gap in the market left by the cancellation of friends but in direct comparison the characters blend much better than in friends and the script is absolutely gold! As with friends the show heavily focuses on romance so if you're thick skinned or hate rom coms then this wont sit right with you either, I also don't find this to be an 'introduce to your friends' type of show as its heavy serialised with most plots needing the whole back-story to be funny. Having said that I got into the show after seeing one random episode from season one and was immediately addicted.
The show is not perfect, the start and middle of season two get shackey with only every other episode being funny but its seemed to pick up pace again toward the end of season two. Definitely give season one a blast and see how you feel after that, season two was worth watching and I'm looking forward to getting my hands on season three.
I do have one big gripe with the show, sometimes it seems to really go at 'nerds' and 'fat' people despite having many references to star wars in the show. The writers seem to express a lot of non-pc opinions through the barny character, I'm just griping about the odd comment that went a little too far for me and I'm sure they would argue that they're simply reinforcing his character.
Living Lohan (2008)
Erm, where's lindsay?
If you've seen a trailer then you know exactly what to expect from this show. Its a successful format, the Osbournes, Snoop Dogg: Fatherhood, Hogan knows best etc. One problem: Where's lindsay? I don't know if she was present in some of the scenes but cut/dubbed out? Did they cut all scenes containing her? Everything referring to her has been blurred out (newspaper/web articles) except pictures around the house, even phone calls with her as the subject are dubbed out. In my opinion the show appears very heavily edited and this ruins the feel of it for me. The usual purpose of this sort of show is to give publicity to the big star of the family, I'm not too sure what the goal of this show is without any Lindsay!? One could speculate but after watching the show I'd be afraid of getting sued!
Gamers (2006)
Genius comedy
A top notch comedy where the majority of the comedy is derived from sheer genius rather than the topic of the movie. There has been a flood of anti-nerd shows recently (i.e. Beauty & The Geek) that show a feasible modern day nerd but without any real depth or true comedy to the characters. This movie hits the nail on the head, hitting the topic with an in-depth knowledge and taking the time to draw hilarious, unique characters. Most definitely worth a watch, even if you're not familiar with the topic of the movie you'll be drawn in by the faux-documentary style of the movie that is already attempting to introduce an audience to the gaming world. No snide inside jokes or moments where you feel you're laughing at a lifestyle, just genuine genius comedy.
The Wayans Bros. (1995)
Doesn't stand up to the test of time
As an after school show I'm sure this was successful but out of context (13 years later) it doesn't offer anything. I'm a huge fan of the wayans bro's but without a good set of writers they don't have the same independence as Will Smith in fresh prince. I like John Witherspoon (Pops) too and think he made a huge contribution to the success of boondocks but after seeing him take off in that it really makes you see that he was a bit flat on this.
Maybe I'm being silly in trying to critique an after school show as a comedy but its certain that the actors in this show are suffering from a lack of something that they all found later on in other projects.
Hanging Up (2000)
Completely null
A completely pointless film. Its a case of where do I start!? Meg Ryan's character appears to sit in the house all day wearing full make up looking like a supermodel yet she's deeply distressed by her fathers illness so she pouts a little bit. Any humour Walter Matthau could have brought to the film was quickly dissipated by the lack of script and screen time for him. After watching this film I still don't understand what it's about, I see Lisa Kudrow, Meg Ryan & Dianne Keating all dressed up with no party to go to.
Whatever the writers were trying to convey didn't work and they managed to accomplish FAIL.
Earth: Final Conflict (1997)
Excruciatingly slow
If I had to give two reasons why this show failed I think I'd go with: low budget and bad writers. Unfortunately the scripts are dire, the dialogue is difficult to watch and the science is more than a little sketchy. Each episode tries to play like the x-files but it just doesn't work. They'll introduce one new character and then flood you with endless reams of dialogue with this character that you know is going to vanish in the next episode. At the end of the episode you will come away with one tiny additional fact about the main characters and be left thinking '45 minutes for that'. EFC might have been better as a trilogy of movies as the information revealed during one season could be encapsulated in 90 minutes of video. For its time the scifi was up to scratch and combined with the androgeny of the alien species you are dragged through season one by sheer fascination. However, the novelty fails when nothing changes in season two and the sci-fi budget appears to drop like a bomb. Could have been a very good show - I cant really go into much detail about the isolation of the plot but you'll get the jist in a few episodes.