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Dredd (2012)
What movie is everyone else watching?
I fail to understand the complete and utter adoration of this movie by everyone. Did I see a different film? I love Judge Dredd the comic. Mega-City 1 with its wild crazies and fashions, the Judges' bikes, the Lawgivers with their six different types of bullet, the Cursed Earth, the muties, fatties, futsies, skyboarders... even Walter the Wobot. None of them are here. The film doesn't even feel like sci-fi. It feels more like a ridiculously hyper-violent and f-word filled gangsta movie. Even Dredd's famous chin is missing! Casting admittedly was always going to be difficult. But Lena Headey's restrained performance doesn't come across as vicious gang-leader Ma-Ma. And Karl Urban is just too quiet. But worse, Dredd himself has no character. He's largely just a robot walking through the movie shooting at people. All the charm (and satirical wit) of the comic is missing. The films just lacks imagination. Walking through a tower block shooting at things gets old very quickly, folks. Despite the praise for the cinematography, all I saw was a few slow-motion shots that rapidly got boring. Never did I think a movie about Judge Dredd would be this DULL! Bring back Stallone is what I say!
The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (2012)
Epic comedy
Forget what the critics say abut this film. The Hobbit is the same grand, epic spectacle we have come to expect from Peter Jackson and co. The action set-pieces are fantastic, but there is more humour in the Hobbit that makes this a much warmer tale than the later Lord of the Rings movies. The dwarfs provide much of this comedy, but even Gandalf gets in on the act. Features a memorable cameo by Barry Humphries as the goblin king, and excellent songs by Neil Finn. Everything about the Hobbit is a pleasure to watch. My personal favourite is Radagast the Brown and his unusual method of transportation! Go see it for yourself. This is a superb adventure film that is not to be missed.
Hawk the Slayer (1980)
Dated but terrific!
Okay, ease up on Hawk the Slayer. So the "battle sequences" aren't exactly epic, the magic wouldn't give George Lucas a run for his money, and the elf does talk a bit like a chartered accountant. But this was 1980! In those days, you could get away with a modest budget. If you think all genre movies hold up well, just take a look at the Death Star battle from Star Wars! Anyway, this film has something modern films bloated with special effect's don't... GREAT character actors! Yes I know that Hawk looks a bit like a 1970s aftershave commercial. But Jack Palance's scenery-munching villain just oozes badness from every pore. Bernard Breslaw, better known from the Carry On Films, does a passable giant. But what a supporting cast... Patrick Magee, Roy Kinnear, Harry Andrews, Warren Clarke, the bloke from The Sweeney... the list goes on. The actors are what sell this film. That, and the brilliant soundtrack (sort of Ennio Morricone meets Jeff Wayne's War of the Worlds). And the plot is okay too (just as well as it's copied from the Magnificent Seven). Try to watch this movie with an imagination, not just with eyes jaded by hundreds of empty, pointless CGI extravaganzas and take it for what it is... fun!
Tron: Legacy (2010)
Tron 2.0
TRON came out of a time when Disney were experimenting with darker tones, such as the underestimated The Black Hole. Computers were exciting, but even then we wondered if there might be a dangerous side to playing all those games. Fast forward almost thirty years later. TRON LEGACY arrives at a time when blockbuster tent-pole pictures are becoming almost irrelevant. Here is a popcorn movie with a difference. A great plot that builds on the original, fantastic visuals, heart-thumping action, a great score, and a wonderful emotional climax to the movie. LEGACY is everything a big-budget summer movie should be. Thrilling, moving, stylish, fun. Olivia Wilde is a revelation is Quora. Michael Sheen does his best David Bowie impersonation. Yet somehow it all works. Great to hear a truly memorable film score again. In these days of soulless corporate fluff, TRON LEGACY stands out above the crowd. This machine has soul.
The Artist (2011)
Silence is golden
When I first saw the trailer for The Artist, it convinced me to go see the film. I didn't know it was a "silent" movie. I only found that out later. Then I became more intrigued. How would they pull this off without losing the audience? As I sat down in the cinema, nothing could prepare me for this wonderful movie. I don't make a habit of watching dramas. A trip to the pictures is too expensive for me, so I only go to see something special. And this was it. Beautifully directed, with a smart and inventive script, and mesmerizing performances from the elegant and very funny cast. But as if that wasn't enough, something else happened inside that cinema. Something magical. People stopped tapping and rustling and talking and... listened. It was the first time I have ever heard a cinema so silent. This film is genuinely affecting. Funny, moving, sad, joyous. And a little tap dancing thrown in for good measure! So my thanks to the filmmakers for such a great evening. And for those of you who aren't sure... go see it for yourself!
Dracula's Dog (1977)
Don't be cruel (to a hound that's true)!
I actually love this film. I saw it in the late 70s as a kid and it scared the heck out of me. Nowadays it isn't scary. However there are some nice effective moments where Zoltan watches the sleeping humans. But come on guys... for sheer inventiveness this film deserves a better rating! Features the great Jose Ferrer in his silliest role, vampire dogs, a great pre-Salem's Lot Reggie Nalder as the baddie, and a preposterous plot about Dracula's descendants. But... the set pieces are really very good. Some unforgettable moments of suspense, great music, and who can forget those glowing dog eyes? Not quite a cult classic, but certainly worth watching. Unintentionally funny? Yes. But this is film with its heart in the right place... held there firmly by a wooden stake!
Sennen joyû (2001)
A cinematic classic
Not only is this better than any Western animation currently out there, but it's better than most live action movies too. This is the story of a director and cynical cameraman who track down a legendary actress who's been a recluse for the last thirty years. As she tells them her life story, fact and fantasy intertwine, and they become sucked into the world of her reminiscences. In this beautifully animated film the characters truly come alive as real people against awesome backdrops set in the past, present and future. It's flawlessly done. But the real treat is the story. A sophisticated plot line that constantly wrong-foots the audience. It is epic while at the same time intimate, and has an emotional climax that's rarely seen in Western films. Beautiful. 10 out of 10.
Knightriders (1981)
Overlooked but brilliant
A young Ed Harris is the first thing most people will notice about this movie. But look a little deeper, and you will find a beautiful little story about keeping your ideals amid a world corrupted by money. The Knightriders are a travelling fair of motorcycle jousters comprised of various marginalized characters, who live an idyllic existence outside of society. Tom Savini shines as the unscrupulous knight who falls prey to a greedy talent agent. However nothing is as simple as that. Some characters learn from their mistakes, while others do not. An earnest message about the evils of consumerism and the perils of following the herd that is still relevant in today's materialistic culture. Excellent performances abound from the varied cast. While there are plenty of gut-wrenching motorcycle stunts to keep everyone entertained. This is a film about innocence lost and found, with a bittersweet ending that propels the film into the realm of the mythic. One of George A Romero's finest.
The Ninth Configuration (1980)
An undiscovered gem!
Written and directed by Wialliam Peter Blatty, the man who wrote The Exorcist, this is at first glance a story about a military mental hospital for war veterans suffering from stress. I say on the surface, because this is in fact something else altogether. The true nature of the movie only comes out very slowly, although you get hints early on, in the eerie symbolism inside the hospital. Stacey Keach stars in what is, I believe, his best ever performance as Colonel "Killer" Kane, a military psychiatrist sent to sort out the motley collection of oddballs in the hospital - and in particular, one very unbalanced former astronaut. To say any more would be to spoil the wonderful surprises in store. But the incredible barroom scene will no doubt stick long in the memory of anyone who watches it. A classic that deserves far more merit.
Dungeons & Dragons (1983)
One of the best cartoons ever
This show stood out head and shoulders over all the other cartoons - and it always puzzled me as to why...until I recently saw them on DVD. This show has something 90% of other shows, both for kids and adults, do not. Great characters. Really great characters. Characters you remember all your life. I don't know of any other kids' show before or since that had such emotional realism. These kids really react the way a bunch of teenagers would if placed in the D&D world. They run the gamut of emotions: scared, selfish, cowardly, brave, helpful, sarcastic, amused, mean, arrogant, humble. The story lines are fast paced and even a little intense by other shows' standards. But that's part of what makes it so great. It has a moral message without being too preachy. My only problem was that Eric was the butt of a joke so often, but I believe that had more to do with the influence of self-appointed "parent groups" than the scriptwriters. Both as a kid myself and as an adult, I still love this show. Modern TV could learn a lot from this.
Paranormal Activity (2007)
Brilliant minimalist chiller
This is one of the scariest films I have ever seen at the cinema. As someone who liked The Blair Witch Project, I was happy for more of the same. But this film is a lot scarier. As each night of video taping approaches, I felt myself tensing up in my seat, dreading what might happen, knowing something would. The filmmakers very cleverly amp up the tension each night. The acting delivers just enough to support the story. The director knows what is truly frightening - those surreal moments when reality seems to be suspended - without resorting to the usual CGI overkill or Pirates-of-the-Carribiean-style ghosts jumping out at the camera. This is a terrific lesson in budget film-making that many multi-million dollar movies would do well to take heed from. A very effective fright machine from start to unforgettable finish. Go see it!
The Dark Knight (2008)
What Was That?
Like most people, I am familiar with Batman. I read Frank Miller's gritty Dark Knight Returns comic in the 1980s, but also watched with glee the comic spoof of the 1960s TV series. I enjoyed the Tim Burton Gothic fairytale, and even the rather dour Batman Begins.
But a few minutes into this movie, I thought to myself "What is this? It isn't Batman!" This was like a grumpy James Bond. And that feeling lingered throughout the film. This is just my opinion - but I didn't see Batman anywhere here.
From Christian Bale's gargling caped spy to the Heath Ledger's raspy bank robber with make-up, I found myself longing for an actual Batman story. Batman would NOT do the things the does in this film - he does not let his lady love die to protect the career of an attorney. If the filmmakers wanted to see how to solve this problem, they should have watched Spider-Man. Yes, his motivations are complex, but in this film he positively revels in doing the wrong thing. He is a soulless instrument of the law - not a vigilante - not even someone interested in justice. And I for one am sick of people talking to him, turning away, then looking back to see he has disappeared! If he was that fast how come he couldn't dispose of both bombs at once?
Many people have ruminated on the deep philosophical questions asked by this movie. Yet they don't make sense. The film is turgid, doesn't make it's points clearly, and contradicts itself. The message at one point is that people can make the right decisions. Yet Batman himself makes the wrong decision - as shown by what happens to Harvey Dent. And the final scene seems to contradict this point - people get the hero they need, not that they deserve. It seems the writers were going for as many profoundly deep points they could make, without bothering to string them together into a coherent drama.
This is one of the few movies (and certainly the only superhero movie) that I ever felt like walking out of - especially during the Harvey Dent subplot that feels like an extra 30 minutes tacked on to the story for no good reason - and haven't we even seen this before in Batman Forever?
In short, this over-hyped, bloated movie didn't - for me at least - live up to its expectations. It wasn't Batman, and I'm not sure I know what it is.
Drag Me to Hell (2009)
Seems Familiar
I really wanted to like this movie. I'm tired of the sick torture-fests of Hostel, was never excited by the rather silly plot twists of Saw no's 1-80. I was downright disgusted at the sacrilegious remake of The Fog, and bamboozled by the countless remakes of Japanese horrors that miss the point when they're translated to the world of Hollywood models.
I was, therefore, disappointed when I saw this movie. I expected the outrageous slapstick of Evil Dead 3, or at least the suspense of the original Evil Dead. Yet there seemed to be neither. The story contained virtually no plot twists to keep me interested (Night of the Demon anybody?) and seemed to consist solely of things being splashed in the unfortunate heroine's mouth! Yes, the special effects were wonderful (they always are). But it's no substitute for a good story. I mean, there just happens to be an anvil suspended from a frayed rope in a garage when our heroine needs it the most? How many of us even possess an anvil? And why would it be tied to the roof??? I desperately want to say good things about the movie. I love Sam Raimi's work so far, especially the underrated Crimewave. Much has been said about whether the heroine is too nice to justify such a fate - but that ignores the arbitrary nature of the plot. Story seems to have taken a back seat - but to our constantly jaded eyes this movie seems to be long talky sequences punctuated by special effects which we have all seen before. Not frightening, just kinetic.
La cité des enfants perdus (1995)
A surreal visionary masterpiece
Starting out with an unforgettable opening scene involving Santa Claus, The City of Lost Children subjects us to a bizarrely beautiful surrealist nightmare (or is it a fairytale?) involving a mad scientist who steals children for their dreams, an underground society of mad cyborg Cyclops, an orphanage of child thieves run by an evil pair of Siamese twins, and the childlike strongman One.
This was the first French movie filmed exclusively on studio sets in 40 years. The result is a beautiful tapestry of grimy docklands that resembles Charles Dickens on acid. The performances are wonderful, and not just from the adults. The City of Lost Children boasts some of the most imaginative and intricate set pieces of any film - for instance check out the scene where the children enter a locked building using a cat and a mouse, or the scene involving the ship and the Octopus.
In short, this is a masterpiece of cinema. And while it may be difficult to follow in some places, it is certainly worth sticking with and watching over and over again. Everything you could want from a film is here.
Gideon Oliver (1989)
Underrated and rarely seen 'eighties gem
Gideon Oliver, as far as I am aware, was never broadcast in the United Kingdom. However I did manage to see the pilot, "Sleep Well, Professor Oliver" on VHS at the time. This is surely one of those "too good for TV" series that was unfairly overlooked and cast into obscurity. A rather cerebral hero, Gideon Oliver was Louis Gossett Jr. at the peak of his powers. The pilot episode saw the crusading scholar take on a cult of Satanists, including Near Dark's Jenny Wright (another reason to search out this neglected gem). A sophisticated storyline, fine character acting and a palpable sense of menace made this a great TV movie in its own right. A shame it never became a cult of its own, unlike many other less-deserving titles. See it if you can!
Watchmen (2009)
Simply a Masterpiece
In the 1980s, Alan Moore helped comics come of age. He created adult story lines of great complexity, filled with profound and sometimes unsettling ideas. Hollywood has consistently botched these ideas with the likes of Constantine, League of Extraordinary Gentlemen and the uneven V for Vendetta.
Until now.
This is a film you must see. Right from the opening tiles, where an alternate history of a USA full of costumed (and sometimes psychopathic) superheroes unfolds to the songs of Bob Dylan, this is Alan Moore's "Watchmen" as it was intended to be. The filmmakers have preserved exactly the spirit of the original. If you're looking for The Matrix, you will be disappointed, because this film is better than that. It is at once profound, eloquent, complex and visually stunning, action-packed, gory and beautiful.
The script manages to distill the best moments from the comic books and make the overall theme clearer. Fine acting from all the leads, a brilliant soundtrack that borrows from the likes of Bob Dylan, Jimi Hendrix, Leonard Cohen and even Koyaanisqatsi, reveals the true reverence the filmmakers have for the original graphic novel. Forget the muddied philosophising of The Dark Knight, this is Hollywood at its best - insightful, thoughtful, dramatic and exciting.
Go see this film...then go read the book.
The Lion, the Witch & the Wardrobe (1979)
A Magical Journey into Fantasy
In this age of cgi animation, it might be easy to overlook the 1979 hand-drawn version. But behind its deceptively simple cartoonish style lies the best version of CS Lewis's fantasy tale ever made. For this movie has what the others lack...heart and soul. From the realistic expressions of the children, the wonderful voices of the British cast, and the truly spellbinding music, this is a charming and genuinely moving movie. I remember watching this in 1980 on the BBC, and it still does not disappoint so many years later. Don't be fooled by the way it looks. This is a great film made by the same people who brought you Charlie Brown. A classic. (For collectors, the British voiced version is now available with an updated cover - it came out in 2005 from Optimum Home Entertainment)
An American Werewolf in London (1981)
Not At All Long in the Tooth!
One of the best werewolf movies of all time. Although not as shocking for its violent dream sequences as when it first attacked our screens, the film still hits home today. The key to its success being its dark humour. Sometimes this seems very out of place. For instance, a grinning ghoul remains light-hearted even when his face is rotting off, producing a genuinely creepy effect. And that's the thing. The humour used in this film is much more sophisticated than in films such as "Fright Night", where comedy is merely used for relief. Here, humour is used to increase our sense of discomfort. It jars so much with the violence and gore, it unsettles us, as we think "What is this Director trying to do to us?". It's elements like this that elevate a very scary movie to greatness. Worth watching for the transformation sequence alone, the special effects do not disappoint either. But it's the strange alternations between comedy and terror that keep you on the edge of your seat. Only a comic genius like Landis could have pulled this off.
Blade: The Series (2006)
Cutting edge of TV horror
This show was an absolute gem, and I can't believe it was cancelled. In my opinion, this was better than the movies. It completely captured the atmosphere of the marvel comics it was based upon - which isn't to say it was childish - far from it. The characters were brilliantly written, three-dimensional and complex. Marcus the villain had good qualities that sometimes made you feel genuinely sorry for him. The plots were constantly surprising - Krista transformed from your typical tougher-than-a-male female into a seductive vampiress battling against her inner nature. How can you argue with a series that has Shaft as Blade's dad? In summary, a brilliant series - one of the best I've seen on TV in the last ten years - and one which will be sorely missed.