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Total Recall 2070 (1999)
The Main Character ( Hume ) ruined this show!
It was unbearable, I could not stand watching this show with such lame acting from that Easton guy, but also the directing of him in the scenes and dialogs he engaged.
It is more like a caricature of a cop, exaggerating a bad mood stance ALL THE TIME... it is horrible, bothering , annoying and does not add anything to the story, nothing at all.
There are many other revenge seeking characters are are way happier than this lame-gray guy.
This show had a great premise, was very promising , but the execution was really poor.
I hope that Michael Easton never gets another Sci-Fi job; he will screw it just like he did to this one.
Last Hope (2018)
Probably the worst Animé I've seen.
AVOID at all cost; do not waste your time watching this pretentious mess.
I resist to believe this is truly an Animé; aside from the aesthetics, drawing techniques and some typical device plots, this has very little in common with true Japanimation. I doubt this show was written by Japanese.
Is like the writers watched a lot of different shows, and they try to put a little bit of everything on it, with their morals included. They created this ridiculous combination of Sci-Fi, with the most fringe logic behind it, making almost no scientific sense; they picked a topic like Quantum physics, thinking they are going bedazzled people with their theoretical mumbo-jumbo. Then the mixed that with Magical / Wishful Thinking, and they solve everything with Love and a mixture of whatever sounds philosophical / spiritual
The plot is not surprising at all, very easy to predict what's going to happen on every episode.
I don't want to write spoilers, but just by checking parts of the first episode you can guess that this is just the a corny , campy idea of what true science function should be.
There is nothing outstanding from the illustration / animation point of view; things we have seen in so many other shows. The action is lame, The jokes are not funny, characters are cliché, their stories are cliché too; this is definitely not the work of a genius.
The Barge People (2018)
Poor Acting, Poor Scripting, horrible action scenes... total wreck!
Do not waste your time with this piece of nonsense. Aside from the premise, which is NOT that all original of course, this film has nothing good.
Characters act in the most stupid way possible, ridiculous situations and reactions from these characters, the acting is so bad that doesn't help at all. Basically an insult to the people of UK.
The practical effects will remind you of the bad low-budget movies of the 80s and the dialogs are so dull it is really difficult to find good things out of this movie.
Save your time, ignore this title.
Voice (2019)
One of the worst Police Dramas EVER!!!!
This show is so bad that I don't even know where to start. Just watch the Original Korean Show, do not waste your time with this pile of excrement. I really don't know how Netflix dares to add this to their catalog.
Lets start with the Acting; I've seen many Thai movies, but even if you compare this acting to those Action-oriented flicks with almost no dialogs, this beats them all, the show kept putting actors in very emotional situations, and they delivered the lamest acting I've seen from Thailand so far.
The writing is ridiculous, the characters end in the most unusual, exaggerated and absurd situations just to push a plot-line that is telegraphed to viewers. You can tell everything is going to happen in the episode just by watching the first few minutes. The writers created the show of the most inefficient police corps ever, imbecile police officers, criminals that do not seem to know how to use the guns they just took from cops, cops can't shoot, bad guys can't shoot, and so on.... oh you'll see the typical bad guy discourse act before killing a good guy, the worst manhunts ever, every bad cliché possible; this show is selling Thai police as unprepared, lacking the most basic tools and procedures, to the level of a country in the midst of war with no government.
The characters are the most unlikable ones that you can find in a show. Both lead roles are filled with so many flaws and they make so many infantile mistakes that you can bear to watch any more minutes of this nonsense, and considering that their poor acting performance, this is simply like going to Television Hell. These officers are very unprofessional even for 3rd world country standards.
OMG, I thought that at least they would bring the world renowned action sequences the Thai Cinema handles so well, good action... but no, probably due to actors limitations (don't know how to fight), action scenes are pitiful...fights, car chases, on foot persecutions, they all look like made by students experimenting for coursework.
AVOID WATCHING THIS... you would do way better watching the 2 seasons of the original Korean show.
Cobra Kai (2018)
I wanted Cobra Kai , NOT another Karate Kid!!!!
I just signed into this series because I thought they were going to redeem the Cobra Kais, but just like others have pointed out in the reviews, this show is silly, crappy and it is just more of the same original Karate Kid where Daniel LaRusso is the hero and Cobra Kais are the bad that are going to lose.
Show has some of the worst acting and scripting that I have ever seen in my entire life, with very ridiculous situations about school, peoples reactions.
The Fighting is , wow... basically an Insult to Martial Arts Cinema; the couldn't get worst actors and doubles for this, choreography is horrible, is an insult that the cast doesn't work hard on the gym to get physically fitter and show some actual martial arts aptitude, most of them seem they have never stepped on a dojo; just like I thought about Ralph Macchio and why I hated they kept on using him for sequels of the Franchise, he being so disrespectful that never learned the arts despised getting so much fame (and probably money) out of it.
I am tired of the same oriental-spiritual-philosophical blah blah blah about martial arts, so many movies about the same.... and we already had the original movies for that, we wanted more of the Anti-Hero kind of Cobra Kai to beat ass, as they started turning nerds and other misfits into killing machines, a way to actually end the bullying. I wanted a Johnny Lawrence selling that Kobe's Mamba Mentality into the Karate sphere, but the show has been moving towards just the same basic plot of the motion pictures, with always some morale behind everything that happens, and inclining the balance towards The Miyagi groupies, to the point of making it predictable and boring.
Please, keep this show as Cobra Kai, if Cobra Kai characters Don't Kick ass I off... no more, I'll be reading the reviews and summary, if I see more of the same forget it.
I WANT HAWK TO BEAT THE CRAP OUT OF DEMETRI FOR REVENGE, IF I DON'T READ THAT HAPPENED IN SEASON 3, THEN, GOOD BYE COBRA KAI.....
1BR (2019)
Main Character is so Stupid you want her to die finish the movie right there!
This movie is so predictable in all the stupid cliches about making something really easy into something complicated. Main character is so unlikable at some point of time you just want her to get killed so the nonsense is over.
I don't want to get into spoilers, but pretty sure that not only the girl , also many of the others would have found multiple ways to escape, even more when things get to a point where she has the advantage... why writers have to come we writing the most stupid scenes for characters like her.
And the end... oh boy, how I hate that ending. Yet another movie that leaves everything to your imagination... that is really getting me tired, it is not cool anymore.
Lost Child (2017)
WARNING NOT A HORROR or THRILLER movie but DRAMA with no ending
I really regret not reading the reviews before; I saw it because Amazon recommended it as a horror movie, oh boy how disgusted I am now.
I hate this art-house wannabe producers and directors with their drama crap and no ending , it is lame that 'left to the audience' open ending... that's not new, there's nothing ground-breaking about 'leaving things to imagination', I hate that stuff, and hate that producers and directors don't hint or warn about that.
Hopefully, people like me will read this and avoid this title at any cost.
A complete waste of my time, I feel robbed.
Karppi (2018)
Unbelievable and Unlikable characters in horrible procedural set.
The only reason I don't give this show 1 ( actually zero ) , is because of the location ( Finland ), and some of the technical aspects of the production.
The lead character is such a mediocre police officer, who doesn't respect anything, any rule, has no morals, is a lousy mother and seem to solve crimes more by luck than by actual detective skills, I truly could not find anything to like her for.
And her sidekick is even worst, he acts like a teenager , with the typical angst of those lost in high school years, in the middle of an existential crisis... you don't know who is more stupid between the main character and her henchman, the way they let suspects and perps runaway is just ridiculous.
In overall the Police of Finland is depicted as a group of morons unprepared to protect citizens almost from anything or anyone.... with one of the slowest responses when calling for backups, and no tools to quickly apprehend suspects, but also lacking of the basic principles of criminal investigation. Gosh, how is it that a person that has just been saved from a homicide attempt be left alone walk home without the police suspecting the criminals may try to strike again!
Poorly written in general, a shame because it has some good camera work, nice Scandinavian Noir look and feel, but very little plausible device plots.
The Lodge (2019)
Do not waste your time in the stupid film !
Besides being extremely slow, not in the typical horror style, but drama slow , nothing interesting happens up beyond have the movie, the whole premise is based on the most ridiculous idea ever "a normal man, will leave a mentally challenged woman(who take pills) with his children in a remote location with nothing around under extreme weather conditions... and(drum rolls) a loaded pistol"!!.... c'mon! Just as stupid is that idea, is the entire sequence of events leading towards the end of this crap, last 20 minutes I had to watch at 2.5X speed.
Eureka (2006)
Awful Show full of stupid ideas - if you liked Stranger Things, avoid this trash
The premise of the show is good, cool actually, but the execution, direction, acting and overall writing were insufferable; I fast forwarded a lot.... there is almost nothing interesting about the plots, just basically throwing out a bunch of crazy science theories when convenient for the writers to move the plot ( very lazy writing )... this is the town where the have the most vulnerable SUPER Top Secret Facility, with the most unprofessional crew, that were supposed to be geniuses. They have technology that doesn't exist but technology that actually exist is overseen when convenient for this lame writers. This goes all down to a silly sit-com about the typically corny romantic elements. If you want a show about romance and guys being stereo-typically dorky better watch The Bing Bang Theory, this nonsense of a show is not even good for that.
That Carter character and its actor were both terrible, no wonder why you don't see that guy in many other shows, actually he did slightly better in another stupid show ( Haven )... I could not stand his presence on screen, him and that Lupo character that were NOT supposed to be nerdy/geeky/dorky where mumbling way more than their mad-scientist counterparts; you'll have to have your audio volume up all the time if you don't want to miss many of the phrases those two spit.
I get really happen when they cancel this kind of crap, I hove SyFy keeps on failing up until they decided to really step-up with decent shows like Netflix is doing with Stranger Things, or that German show called Dark... that's more for real Sci-Fi fans with brains... they are not perfect, but are not so full of claptrap like this show.
And I don't event want to talk about the ending... and as you will see, so many questions that are NEVER answered, not because the writers intended for some complex deep philosophical consideration and/or speculation, but because they are simply BAD writers and it seems the network pulled the plugs and rushed them to do something to finish that garbage.
Gotham (2014)
Waste of Technique on a poorly written show.
Yeah, the technical aspects of the show seem to be fine, and that's the only reason why I am giving a 3/10 to ti. Of course, the Bruce Wayne kid is probably the worst choice of actor the cold find for this character, horrible, this kid either doesn't know anything about acting or simply this is not his kind of movies, besides he doesn't fit much the physique of what we would expect will become Batman in the future.
Yeah, we have been told this show is not supposed to follow the Canon, I wonder why, I bet the writing would have been way better if they stick to the comics, but no, they had to come up with bringing on the pamphlets of the season (left vs. right, patriarchy vs. feminism, stoic vs. emotional, diversity, tolerance, etc, etc, etc....). The result is : writing lower than cartoonish level, lots of Deus Ex-Machina end of plots, far-fetched situations, and of course, they had to turn it into the typical soap opera plots of love triangles, and lots of drama, characters all thinking more emotionally than logically driven.
Seriously, what were they thinking when they created and elaborated characters like Tabitha, Barbara Kean and Fish Mooney, Butch, The Mad Hatter, and their version of Ra's Al Ghul this is way far than just not following the canon, is denying the canon, it was not necessary, and in the end it didn't add any good plot twist.
In many occasions you feel they give too much power to certain characters, and then they don't know how to solve the plot-holes around this, later you see the same characters defeated by way weaker opponents or situations, these writers invent plot devices that even 12 year old kids can see through.... some times is better to use a little bit of reality when writing about what people would do in fiction rather than inventing these stupid series of unlikely ridiculous events.
Let's hope someone else does a better Batman prequel in the future, perhaps through a Saga of Full Featured Films.
The VVitch: A New-England Folktale (2015)
Please don't call Horror this crappy Drama!
It is boring, dull, slow, slow, slow to death... I didn't give it a 1 just because the managed to at least replicate the ambiance of the 17th Century, but what a waste of time is to watch this flick!!!... IF YOU LIKE HORROR, DON'T WATCH THIS MOVIE!! it is for boring old critics and the connoisseur wannabes!
Ratter (2015)
Another Movie Without an End... !
What was this supposed to be? Horror? C'mon, more like a reality show about girl with ex-boyfriend issues. This is the kind of crap that I awfully hate, a movie that spends the 90% of the time building up to reach a dead-end.
No conclusion, you don't know anything about anything, why things are happening, and for the sake of leaving you with an "open interpretation of the end", these lazy scriptwriters end the movie with what should be the beginning. Very disappointing; I felt like I wasted 1:117 minutes watching one of the worst movies ever. When are the storytellers going to learn that hackers are NOT super humans, that are things that are simply not possible, and that if someone gets to the point of feeling hacked, a visit to the "Geek Squad" of their College/University or any group of decent IT Geeky friends could help them determine if they are truly hacked and if someone is manipulating their smart-devices.
The Kings of Summer (2013)
A film about nothing , not a comedy, barely a drama, almost tragedy!!!
I had to write something about this crap since it made me waste so much time trying to find something good in it.
This film is not fun, it has some jokes and overly exaggerated stances from some actors to give a sense of humor, but for most part it is boring, slow paced, it has no "spice" in it.
The whole "coming-of-age" genre is usually crappy, with people trying to deliver messages or promote agendas to mold youngsters the way they want; never letting stories to truly come out of a frame; you kind of know almost everything is going to happen from the beginning and this flick is exactly the same; and worst, for whatever little surprise "part" that you might expect at the end, it just ends numbly with nothing to add, nothing to say, especially no coherence with the main character's previous approach and personality.
There is no message to deliver (at least not a meaningful one), parents are not the caricature expose in this horrible flick, (and if they are, I feel sorry for USA); teens are not that stupid either, so this film ambiguity between realism and parody is just awful. The film was so boring I spent half the time watching to clock to see if it was about to end; and I just want to see if at least at the end the people behind it would do something "out of the box", but nah!...
It has one of the worst movie final sequences I have ever seen; I really hate the Climax and final untangling of this movie, IT DOESN'T WORTH YOUR TIME!!!! Well I would not see crap like Lord of Flies or Stand By Me; so if you're that type of people, go suit yourself, but if you found Stand by Me boring (just like I did); don't even try to start this one.
The Hunger Games (2012)
Close-Up + Close Up +. .. Close Up + Shaky Camera + Blur ... up to Sickness!!!
Oh man! what a though film to see, this is for very vision healthy people; I waste my time hoping to see the sci-fi action flick I expected from the Trailers; but not, so creepy, the director thinks is cool to undermine the set decoration and special effects focusing his whole cinematographic style on such annoying things as out-of-focus shots, trembling vision and NO SLOW MOTION AT ALL.
I saw this movie in a pretty decent theater and still I was unable to see at least any of the action scenes; but I couldn't see any, literally, I could not see any of the quick movement stuff, they were giving me a headache; cuts so fast, camera so close to objects and people, bad lighting, dead colors, awful post-processing.
One expects that a movie based on future societies with modern cities and fantastic landmarks should have an eye-candy atmosphere; but this one was nothing about that. They wanted to give you a sense of action, some thrill and extra drama dosage by visually killing the film. It lost any visual attractive.
The plot is not quite bad at all; there are some interesting elements, but the premise that sustains the whole story (the Hunter Games celebration/Ceremony/Feast/TV Show/Sacrifice/etc) is not well explained in the movie, perhaps the books do a better job. The given theory is quite vague and contrasts with available technology and production means, wealthiness, etc.
The Acting is not so bad, some recognizable faces do a decent performance; the protagonist (Katniss) does a great portray, and her character is really cool (at least so far) is not the stupid Bella from Twilight, this is a hard-boiled down-to-earth forest-side-girl, a true hunter and a rational human being, her deeds are credible.
I hope that for the next 2 ones they don't focus the whole story around another Love-Triangle, I think we are kind of tired of the same crap; if the books are like that, I prefer to have the films a little bit distant from the books, letting Katniss to remain a cool Steve Macqueen Girl-next-door character.
Cold Weather (2010)
Such a Slow, time spendthrift, Bad, bad, bad, awfully bad Movie!
If you've seen the sitcom called The Office with Steve Carell, well this is the same kind of a bad cinematography imitation, camera wise, lights wise, takes wise, pace wise, characterization wise, BUT, BUT, BUT, there's nothing to laugh about.
Where do I begin, with the plot? there's no plot; I don't even know what this movie was about.
A mystery? which mystery? a disappearance that was not such. A group of common dull young people, hopeless people just letting days go by. A bad guy that never showed up. A very stupid girl who took a very stupid decision but not stupid enough to make a movie about it.
No, no, no, there is no plot.
And the end, the end, come on people! you could have a better idea for an ending, what happened? you ran out of money and couldn't continue to shoot the flick?
For regular suspense, thriller, mystery fans, this is an awful movie, annoying, you won't be able to fully watch it, I just went thru it because I was doing something else while it was running on my attached HDD TV set.
For Comedy fans... don't even try to play it, you'll regret it.
L'affaire Farewell (2009)
Slow, Slow, Too Slow... even for a historical films fan like me!!!
I couldn't convince my friends to keep watching the film with me, and me myself, I ended up watching it just to complete it with no great expectations after the first half.
Historical facts are not such revealing as we would like, sure there are a couple of facts of great impact, but still I was hoping for more.
The acting of the main characters was decent, although Fremont was kind of cheesy; but the acting from the American side, especially Dafoe, was awful, so lame I didn't want to hear their part. Reagan was kind of over-portrayed.
The end was as dull as the rest of the film.
Just because it is an extraordinary story (rea life one) it deserves up to 5 stars.
Beastly (2011)
How could they call this mess a movie?!
C'mon girls, even for the most girly girls of all, this is pure crap, nonsense.
No story at all, it started with a premise they never developed, and just added in dull dialog and unlikely events to force the flow the path they wanted to go; it's like cheating a "Movie Making Video game".
OK, I'll give that it has the picture, some effects, appropriate lightning and score are worthy of an A-movie, a decent theatrical release level. But the rest, the plot development, dialogs, characters, everything is so cheesy that even a 15-year old pink-minded schoolgirl would see thru them and come to realize that is pure B.S.
Yeah, we got it... yada, yada, love triumphs over hate, the inside is what counts, the nerds are also cool, the good looking are not smart and whatever other "underlaying deep CLICHÉ message" you have to deliver.
I don't want to spoil the content, but, you tell me, is that the way, a guy with a psychological profile as depicted at the beginning of the film, would fight a curse by a witch? I bet if this movie was for men, the guy would stick her with a wooden stake, burn her while crucified and then ride eastern Europe looking for a Gypsy which to revert back the spell... hehehehehe
13 (2010)
Great Idea, not so great execution!
The End, The End, The End, where is my end? Oh darn!, are the writers from England or some place else in Europe?
why did they have to leave things the way they did at the End? No no no, don't come to me with that old crappy idea of Leaving things to the audience's imagination,that's not original anymore.
Great plot, kind of cheesy the way they had to involve the protagonist, kind of unlikely way to get attached to such a strange group. Camera, Light, Scenarion were very appropriate for the plot, kind of created the right context, the score was acceptable.
And then: the end. When you start realizing that the film is coming to an end, you also start to shout things like: "why doesn't he do this... or he should go this way, why didn't he do that...".
You kind of feel like the Writers and Director where in a hurry for finishing the film and they led the main character thru a course of bad decisions that got him into the must UNEXPECTED End, but not unexpected in a good way, believe me! Although some might like it.
Stake Land (2010)
Slow, Slow, Too Slow... it was not what I expected
Probably it's me, but when it comes to post-apocalyptic bloodsucker movies, I'm waiting for something like Vampire Hunter D turned into a Live-Action movie. I prefer the Priest, not a super-movie either, but better action, effects and pacing.
The story wasn't so bad, but some wit was lacking when they developed the characters.
The end is cut, not a real end, it doesn't follow the logic of the whole previous story; it seems a trend among nowadays movies, especially thrillers. Are they running out of moneys and ideas by the end? I'd rather have a better trained main actor, so that fight scenes look more appealing, interesting, fun overall... in this movie, fights are just for the purpose of connecting scenes, nothing really worthy of remark.
Eyecandy?!...hmmm... no, not at all; pretty standard cinematography style; a couple of nice shots; no great action sequences, or extraordinary panoramic views, I mean it meets the professional level anyone expects from an A-category movie, but just that, nothing surprises you.
Vampires are more like Zombies in this one, interesting approach, these ones are not like the invincible vamps from Twiligh-crap or True-Blood/Vampire-Diaries series. This ones are more like savage animals, making it possible for humans to defeat them.
Sin nombre (2009)
It seems a very realistic journey!
I didn't gave it more because of the Twilight-like love or attraction story, and the stupid way it all concluded.
But I should say that the director did a great job, he really captured the personality and attitude of central Americans, its gangs, gangs credos, the hardships of the "Trip to America".
This is a nice movie for MEXICANS to see how they ask for mercy in USA but as pure hypocrites they repudiate immigrants from central American countries like El Salvador, Honduras, Guatemala and Nicaragua.
The pace is too slow in some occasions, sometimes you wish they would develop more some characters, some of them are purely one-dimensional, they only exist to drive the story towards a forced conclusion.
Ajeossi (2010)
Who doesn't love revenge flicks!
I don't know about those romantic crap lovers, with strange sexual tendencies, but for real men, this is the kind of film you would like to see with your fellas having some beer and pizza, while saying things like: Oh! S#$! What Tha@#$@$, did you see that?!
Yes it is an old theme, yes it's similar to Taken, The Professiona, Man on Fire, and even other Koreans like the Trilogy of Vengeance and I Saw the Devil,but still is so cool in such unique ways that you may want to see it a couple of times while showing your American friends how independent filming is done in Asia.
At the beginning, I thought it would be like many Korean movies with long slow paced scenes, dramatizing events, but no, it turned out to be a well balanced action movie, with a proper ending.
F (2010)
Why I hate this movie which had the potential to be a good one!
***SPOILER****
IT HAS NO END... yep, NO END AT ALL!, is a piece of crap at the end, it's like if they ran out of money and couldn't finish filming, so they just cut the footage and inserted the credits.
Just like @Aroykoc commented in his review, it left us with a lot of plot holes, because it has no ending, no final explanation of why things happened. So if you're like me, a guy who hates movies leaving you with so many questions at the end, just don't see this one... I'll leave that crap for those who think it is Poetry, or Philosophical to let the audience decide what happens next (after the end).
In addition, this film is one of those crappy thriller movies that keeps you saying: "oh! why he/she didn't do this, or didn't do that... that makes no sense..." ; you know, one of those films you think it could end the whole plot if they just pulled the Fire-alarm (calling fireman and police), or leave the building after seeing weird stuff like blood and corpses :)
The Hurt Locker (2008)
Awful, Awful to death... it had to be a War Movie made by a woman!
I was listening to a Dominican radio show about the 2010 Oscars, and the guy was saying that this amazing movie was coming to Dominican Republic (where I was living at the moment); it was a new movie about a Bomb Squad set in Iraq during the U.S. invasion, and blah blah blah...
And I was like: "wait a minute, I saw that crappy movie on T.V., yeah, I saw it on Cable T.V., I think it was the MGM Channel... is not a new movie, and is completely boring; so I call the Radio Station and the guy gave me the reason, the movie was old, but he kept saying it was a Great movie.
Great what?!!! they must be nuts! What is this movie about? no action, no thriller, no fun stuff... Drama? you're asking me to see drama in a War Movie, in a place where everybody is supposed to be freaked out!!! Another Jar Head piece of crap? C'mon!!! IF you want drama, make a documentary about the impact of the invasion, and why Iraqi people will hate United States people for dozens of generations.
If you are to entertain me, I love the old style good War Action Movie, pure adrenaline, lots of dead bodies, explosions, etc... Like the good old Black Hawk Down! Don't get confused, I loved Platoon, Apocalypse Now, Rambo 1 & 2 and 4, The Expendables, Saving Private Ryan, Enemy at the Gates, Commando, Delta Force, even old stuff like The Battle of Midway, Dirty Dozen, Bridge Over The River Kwai, and others (tens of war/war-situation movies I liked). But this is nothing like those great war flicks; it shares nothing with them, so it is pure crap!
Good Hair (2009)
Less controversial than what I expected :)
What this documentary depicts is a phenomena occurring in any American Country from Canada to Argentina, wherever black people live.
This madness about spending thousands of dollars, before getting good education, or something to eat, and in addition be exposed to harmful chemicals is common everywhere.
So I was expecting not just the fun facts, but a deeper psycho-social analysis (again mixed with Chris' jokes) of Why, How, and what should we do?
It misses deeper analysis of health issues, psychological side effects, environmental effects, etc.
It failed to expose the inferiority complex regarding the beauty of thicker hair; and how it should be molded and folded into "Good Hair".