Reviews

Allison Hayes is a beautiful, but dangerous, visitor from another planet. Her race of aliens can't stand heat, and can live only in sub-zero temperatures. Seems a group of American scientists is installing a weather-recording machine in the coldest region of the South Pole. Just then, this space-girl lands at their Antarctic weather station, and that's when strange things begin to happen. First, a mysterious electronic force knocks out their radio transmitter, and then members of the expedition start disappearing. The cause of all this havoc is the female alien from space (Allison Hayes), wearing a short skirt, while the humans are freezing and wearing thick parkas. This episode was rerun numerous times, from 1959 - 1962, often listed as a "movie" on TV channels airing science fiction films. Seems this episode borrowed the basic idea from the classic movie "The Thing from Another World" (1951), but with Allison being a sexy alien, as opposed to James Arness being a giant, scary alien. This is the kind of film that could best be viewed when presented by a late-night horror host like Sammy Terry, whose "Nightmare Theatre" thrilled young fans in Indianapolis in the 1960s. It's been a long time since I saw this show, and if it ever turns up on TV again, it will probably not be as scary or exciting as I vaguely remember it, but it will certainly be nostalgic.

In the late 1830s, when much of the Old West was still Mexican territory, 4 people are travelling through the deserts, north of Texas and a 3-day ride from Santa Fe. They are: the Scalphunter, who says his trade is being a "buffaler" (buffalo hide trader), he is in search of gold; a former ship's Captain, also in search of the gold; a Woman from England, a former chambermaid who, in exchange for ship's passage to America, signed an agreement to serve the Captain for 5 years, she is an indentured servant; and Mr. Rainbow, a former soldier who killed Indians. The Captain sets out to find some of Montezuma's gold, risking danger from both the native Indians and Mexican soldiers. The woman wants to get out of her contract with the Captain and go to New Orleans, she asks Mr. Rainbow to take her there, but he turns her down. Scalphunter wants half of the Captain's gold, and tags along with his men. Mr. Rainbow sets out across the desert through the Viaje de la Muerte, the Journey of Death.

One night, during a terrible wind storm, the Captain and the Woman and Scalphunter and his men are in a small cabin. Scalphunter snaps impatiently at his men to be quiet. The Captain begins his lecture, "We were in the North Sea in mid-December, sailing for Glasgow harbor, when a black mask came over the horizon. For a solid fortnight, Davey Jones swabbed the decks. 10 men washed overboard before I had time to call all hands below. There were 50 of us, aye 50, holed up in a room not half the size of this one. Tossed against the hull, so hard you could hear their bones crack. And for the whole time, from not one mother's son, was there a whimper." Scalphunter quips sarcastically, "Do you know what your trouble is, Captain? You ain't got no boat." Just then, Mr. Rainbow drops in. Is he after the gold or the woman, or both? An intriguing movie with fascinating character studies.

This TV series was about the exploits of two seedy detectives: Nick Small (Darren McGavin) and his partner Chip Frye (Jack Blessing). Frye had the superpower to shrink down to 6 inches in height, due to a freak lab accident-- sometimes this shrinking ability helped when he was working on his cases, sometimes not. This pair of Private Eyes investigated pollutants for a nature-loving client. The series appeared on CBS, from March 7, 1983 - June 15, 1983. There were 6 episodes-- 1) Pilot episode 2) "The Case of the Concerned Husband" 3) "The Case of the Street of Silence" 4) "Schlockty Too" 5) "Endangered Detectives" 6) "Fiddler on the Hoof"

One New York reviewer wrote: "Albert Salmi was the guest star in episode #5 of 'Small & Frye'. Albert was easily the most enjoyable highlight of this short-lived TV series, which featured his real-life pal Darren McGavin."

This movie is another of the 10 remakes of old AIP movies. Teenage Caveman, the remake, relies on a lot of nudity whereas the original movie had a plot. The remake was filmed indoors (to save money), whereas the original at least had outdoor shots which gave the appearance of a caveman environment. And the remake relies on swiping ideas, such as a Wolverine-like (from the "X-Men") main character who can heal instantly. Once again: watch the original movie, and skip the remake.

This movie is a remake of "How to Make a Monster" (1958). One of the producers is Lou Arkoff, son of Samuel Z. Arkoff. It has none of the charm, originality nor good writing of the original. Ed Wood had written a script, back around 1955, for his good friend Bela Lugosi-- Bela was to have portrayed a makeup artist who makes real life monsters. It was eventually turned into an AIP movie. In 2001, AIP was making remakes of 10 of their old movies. This remake turns the monster into a video game, and the film seems to appeal to computer gamers only. The movie is dedicated to the memory of Samuel Z. Arkoff and James H. Nicholson, founding fathers of AIP-- it is not a fitting tribute. My advice: watch the 1958 original, and skip this turkey.

During construction of the Kincaid Tower in Lexington, Kentucky, a producer decided to make a movie about it. In the film, they are rushing to complete the building on schedule, they need to put up the top 9 stories in 3 weeks. This calls for some super construction workers-- the "only guy" for this job is a former construction whiz, now the truck-driving, womanizing Mike Catton (Lee Majors). He has to assemble his whole gang of super builders. The "Demolition Man" owes him a favor. Then there's "Dancer" for the last round-up, and others. Albert Salmi as "Tank" is the best of the lot, giving a stand-out performance; when we first see him, Albert is using his electromagnet crane to lift a metallic outhouse 60 feet in the air-- with someone in it! (The person inside the sky-high outhouse cusses a blue streak and throws newspapers at Albert.) There are countless innuendoes, comparing erecting Steel buildings to guys' other functions. In a scene in a bar, Lee Majors confesses to Art Carney that he "froze" on top of a building. Art Carney gives him the manly, double-meaning advice: "This building will give a you chance to 'get it up' again." Then, the Dream Team arrives at the construction site. This is the team they'll be talking about forever! Later, while socializing, Lee Majors says: "I get restless, maybe, just not used to all that sitting around." Jennifer O'Neill says: "You just tell me when you start 'stiffening' up... and I'll give you a massage." Still later, when they are discussing his fear problem, Jennifer asks him: "Why does yours have to be bigger than everyone else's?" As for Albert Salmi, he uses his big crane to drop a huge steel beam on (bad guy) R.G. Armstrong's car-- what a zany! (in real life, Albert Salmi and R.G. Armstrong had been friends for decades, back to when they starred together in the Broadway show "End As a Man" in 1954. R.G. even attended Albert's first wedding. This movie was like a reunion for them.)

Will the Dream Team get the building finished before the deadline? Will Lee Majors overcome his construction erecting dysfunction? Watch the movie and find out.

There was a lot of thought put into this TV series, which was not your typical Western. For one thing, his name: a Paladin was a lawful knight of Charlemagne's court. This accounts for the chess-piece knight on his calling card, and the lyrics of the theme song which refer to him as "a knight without armor in a savage land." His calling card said "Have Gun, Will Travel" and "Wire Paladin, San Francisco." (By the way, "Wire" was not his first name, it's a verb meaning "send a telegram.") Paladin, the only name he ever went by, was a true split-personality type. He was equally at home wearing expensive suits and living a rich playboy lifestyle in a San Francisco hotel, or donning his black working clothes, and avenging evil. Some of the clients he stood up for were not in the majority; for example, he once defended the Mennonites, which probably would make him seem to be a non-conformist. Paladin only cared about right and wrong. Even though he charged a fee for his services, he only took cases he believed in, and clients he wanted to help.

" 'Have Gun, Will Travel' reads the card of a man. A knight without armor in a savage land. His fast gun for hire heeds the calling wind. A soldier of Fortune is the man called Paladin. Paladin, Paladin, where do you roam? Paladin, Paladin, far, far from home."

Moe, Larry and Curly don't look like Doughboys (old slang for "American soldiers"), they are dressed as Japanese soldiers for a photo session. Grabbing a quick lunch at a diner, they stuff their mouths with bread, and sound like they are talking gibberish-- the owner mistakes them for Japanese spies. The Stooges run away, and wind up in a house with German spies. They are introduced to 3 beautiful German ladies: Miss Zweiback ("twice-baked bread"), Miss Schwarzbrot ("rye bread") and Miss Pumpernickel ("dark rye bread"). The Three Stooges quip that the ladies are "well bread" (well bred). Trying to convince them they are real Japanese soldiers, the Stooges do some "oriental" balancing acts, and fall down a lot. The real Japanese soldiers show up, and the Three Stooges knock everyone out in a hilarious fight scene. With the Three Stooges around, America is still safe for democracy.

A lot of the Bowery Boys movies had the theme that Sach discovered a new power-- whether a K.O. punch in the boxing ring, or a wonderful singing voice, etc. In this film, Sach develops the power to "smell" diamonds! (Sach got it from taking a new antibiotic, "Striptopifficin" 50,000 micrograms, for a sinus "infatuation.") When a jewel thief runs into Louie's Sweet Shop, and tries to hide some stolen diamonds from a policeman, Sach sniffs out the loot-- "a king's transom" of diamonds, as Slip says. So the Boys decide to sniff out diamonds in Africa. Actually, they spend a lot of time on a sound stage with trees and tropical plants, and look at mis-matched stock footage of the Serengeti Plain (sort of like an episode of "Ramar of the Jungle"). They hack through a steaming jungle, where the temperature is 130 degrees "centipede." Sach meets beautiful jungle girl Anatta (Laurette Luez), with the same beauty salon hairdo, eye shadow and lipstick she had as Tigri in "Prehistoric Women" (1950). She wants to "Kiss, kiss, kiss" Sach (who said these movies make sense)? The Boys are captured by a hostile tribe, and the witch doctor wants to shrink everyone's head (except Sach's). Slip bemoans, "I don't know one place in New York City that sells 1-and-7/8 size hats!" Will they escape? Will they find the diamonds? Will they ever see the Bowery and Louie's Sweet Shop again? Watch the movie and enjoy!

A Bowery Boys movie, written by Edward Bernds and Elwood Ullman. It doesn't get any better than this. And if you don't think this movie has one of their prettiest guest stars in Laurette Luez, you should get your eyes examined by an "octopus" (oculist).

Working at a gas station, the 3 Stooges provide "super service" to three visiting European college professors. They accidentally blow up their car, and escape by borrowing a truck "Yukon Ice Cream Co., frozen dainties." Since Curly fell asleep in the back, he becomes a frozen dainty. Moe and Larry barbecue Curly to thaw him out, Moe quips, "20 minutes to a pound-- we'll be here a month." Donning the caps and gowns the professors had in their luggage, the 3 Stooges hitch a ride to Mildew College. Their academic lesson consists of leading the girls in singing along with the very catchy number, "Swingin' the Alphabet." B-A, Bay. B-E, bee. B-I, bickey-bye, (etc.) When the real college professors arrive, they announce they are going to leave the college, but the Stooges get them to come back-- with a bang.

This story was written by the incomparable Elwood Ullman. In the 1930s, he had written for the legendary magazine "Captain Billy's Whiz Bang," which in 1939 inspired "Whiz Comics" in which Billy Batson became Captain Marvel with the Bang of a magical thunderbolt. Elwood would write 37 "Three Stooges" shorts, 14 Bowery Boys movies, and capped his career by writing 2 "bikini" movies for AIP. This short was the debut for Marjorie Deanne (Miss Katsby), her first film in which she played a character with a name. In Marjorie's 6-year film career, she would be in 2 other Stooges shorts: "Dutiful But Dumb" (1941) and "Matri-Phony" (1942). Trivia: the title of this short is a spoof of the movie "Valiant Is the Word for Carrie" (1936).

"The Nine Lives of Elfego Baca" starring Robert Loggia was a series of 10 wonderful episodes shown on "Walt Disney Presents" from 1958-1960. There was a compilation of these shows released as the movie "Six Gun Law" in 1962. The introduction song told us about Elfego, the brave man who fought outlaws with his brains instead of guns (he was an attorney). "Elfego was wise, and Elfego was strong. Elfego, El Gato, who made right from wrong. And the legend is that, like El Gato the cat, Nine Lives had Elfego Baca." It was a great movie, and taught kids to admire heroes like Elfego, who always fought to right the wrongs in the world. Trivia: Robert Loggia, who played the cat-like Elfego, El Gato, here would go on to star in his own TV series, playing another cat-like hero: "T.H.E. Cat" (1966).

Spokane, Washington... Somewhere Northeast of Twin Peaks. As the story opens, we find out that 10 years ago, ax murderer Dan Marcum killed his wife and their two children in a church. In the present, Marcum escapes from jail and gets hit by a car, and promptly dies (or does he)? Meanwhile, the former pastor of the church wants a family of four to move into the now-abandoned church (am I the only one who thinks this is a bad idea)? The family consists of the father, Ralph, who is unemployed; the mother Amy who works as a waitress in a dive; their pretty daughter Jeannie (this is the screen debut of Jennifer Salmi, daughter of actor Albert Salmi); and young son Stevie. No sooner does the family move in, than strange things start to happen. The ax-wielding apparition of Marcus starts to show itself. Snakes appear in the jacuzzi-sized baptistery. When Jeannie goes to her room to find something nice to wear on a date, the word "slut" appears on her mirror, and chains materialize around her legs. It is a battle of wills. Who will win? The ghost who wants them out of there, or the family that is determined to stay? It brings up the question: "How do you kill a ghost?" Though the movie is hindered by a low budget and some cheesy special effects, it is nonetheless a good psychological thriller, and worth seeing.

Curly, Moe and Larry are 3 unemployed actors looking for work. After they are thrown out of the 26th theatre, they decide to take the bouncer's advice to "climb the tallest building and jump off!" Before they do, Curly decides to have a big cream pie, "so I can di-gest right." Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk. Moe splats the pie in his face, and the Stooges go to the top of a tall building. There, the Stooges meet 3 beautiful girls with a dancing act. They are Hilda, Wilda, and Tilda. The boys pair off, and kiss the girls-- they decide not to leap. Then the Stooges and the girls do a hilarious dance number when someone starts playing the piano. The pianist turns out to be a potential sponsor, and asks them if they are musicians. Larry says, "Oh sure-- I play in 5 flats, and get thrown out of all of them." This short has more dance (with the girls doing ballet, and the Stooges in drag) and less slapstick than their 1930s films. The Stooges also do a skit about the Army, perhaps leftover from their WW II material. This short marks the screen debut of beautiful Nita Bieber (the "watch my figure" girl)-- her next appearance was in the Bowery Boys movie "News Hounds" (1947).

Bill and Robin are scientists, and rivals for the affection of Lena (played by Barbara Payton-- being the love interest of two men is basically the same role she played in "Bride of the Gorilla"- 1951). It's amazing what two scientists can do, in a barn they bought and converted into a workshop, and with only £2,000 for research funds. They create a machine called a "Duplicator," a.k.a. a "Reproducer," with 2 identical pods, (much like would be used in "The Fly"- 1958). This can "convert energy into matter" (more on that next paragraph). At first they make an exact replica of a watch, then another small object. The plot thickens: Robin marries Lena. Even though Bill could create copies of anything in the world-- gold, rubies, rare drugs, radium-- Bill only wants to create another Lena. The Duplicator has only worked on inanimate objects; Bill modifies it so it can make perfect duplicates of small animals. Oddly enough, Lena agrees to be duplicated. So now we have Lena, and her duplicate Helen. But, since Helen is a perfect copy, she too is in love with Robin! What will the lovesick Bill do now? A hokey, no-budget movie, typical of 1950s flicks with pseudo-science and trite plots. It's curious that even though inventor Bill can be a genius at science, he is a knucklehead at love.

The theme of this movie reminds me of lyrics to the song "Money for Nothing" by Dire Straits-- "Money for nothin' and your chicks for free." The Duplicator seems to create things: effortlessly, cost-free, and out of thin air, sort of like Barbara Eden did in "I Dream of Jeannie." Oh, they say that the matter "is created from energy." According to Einstein's equation, "E equals m c-squared" you can convert matter into energy (a lot of energy). In an atomic explosion, about one gram of matter (Uranium-235) will turn into the energy of 18-kilotons of TNT. This works both ways. You could theoretically convert energy into matter-- but then, it would take the energy of an 18-kiloton atomic bomb to produce one gram of matter! So it would take about the energy of 450 atomic bombs to create one pound of matter. Since Helen weighs over 100 pounds, you would need the energy of 45,000 atomic bombs to create that much matter. Wouldn't it be easier for Bill to try a dating service?

Neighborhood kids playing baseball in the street in front of Louie's sweetshop keep hitting baseballs through his storefront window. Sach suggests they get permission for the kids to use a big, vacant lot nearby. Slip telephones the lot owners, the Gravesend family-- Slip wants permission to use the lot because he is a "bene-fracturer" of humanity. They are invited to drive over, since mad scientists Dr. Derek Gravesend and Anton Gravesend want brains-- to put into their gorilla and robot! Derek needs a tiny brain; Anton notes: "A creature with a brain that small wouldn't have sense enough to come in out of the rain." Quick cut to Sach, standing in the rain. At the spooky house, Slip and Sach meet Grissom, the butler, whom they call "Gruesome" (kind of a prototype Lurch, 10 years before "The Addams Family"). The Boys also meet a sexy female vampire Francine Gravesend (a prototype Morticia); she wants them for their blood. Amelia Gravesend wants to feed the Boys to her Agopanthus Carnivorous, her man-eating tree (sort of like in "The Wizard of Oz"). There are old jokes, such as the butler saying: "Walk this way" (this joke would be 20 years older in "Young Frankenstein"). Some jokes are pure Bowery Boys-- the butler says, "This old manor house goes back to colonial times; take this chair for instance: 1775." To which Slip retorts, "17.75? Anybody that paid over 3 bucks for it got rooked!" Some skits are recycled: Slip and Sach are locked in a closet; they use a saw to cut a hole in the far wall, and crawl through-- it leads to a cage with a gorilla in it. If this scene looks familiar, it's because it had been used before with the Three Stooges short "Dizzy Detectives" (1943). There's lots more fun and scary thrills. Just watch this movie and enjoy!

Paul Wexler would appear in other horror movies, like "The Four Skulls of Jonathan Drake." Laura Mason would appear in other films, as a Harem Girl, and then a Venus Girl in "Queen of Outer Space." Lloyd Corrigan had been in a previous Bowery Boys movie "Ghost Chasers" (1951). John Dehner would play occult characters in "The Twilight Zone" in the episodes: "Mr. Garrity and the Graves" & "The Jungle." Steve Calvert (Cosmos the gorilla) had played an ape in "Bela Lugosi Meets a Brooklyn Gorilla"; his last movie was playing a gorilla in the Ed Wood 'classic': "The Bride and the Beast." Trivia: this is the only Bowery Boys movie with "Bowery Boys" in the title.

Slip Mahoney is working as a copy boy for a large N.Y. newspaper, and has aspirations of being a reporter; Sach is a photographer. Slip wants to expose big-time gamblers, like Dapper Dan Greco, who are fixing sporting events. Slip is assisting a reporter, Mark Morgan, whose girlfriend is Jane Ann Connelly (Christine McIntyre, who was in 32 "Three Stooges" shorts). One of Greco's henchmen, Gabe, is arrested and immediately sprung. Gabe heads to Louie's sweetshop, to talk to the Bowery Boys, and show off his girlfriend Mame. In the sweetshop, Mame (the fabulous Nita Bieber), strikes a cute pose and says, "I've gotta watch my figure." Gabe (noticing Slip, Whitey, Chuck and Bobby staring) retorts, "Well, there's no sense ALL of us watching it!" However, Gabe's tip sets the Bowery Boys into action. Slip and Sach go undercover, approaching crime kingpin Greco, in their aliases "Pete the Blaster" and "Ermine the Crow." Saying they are working for Dutch Miller, they get the inside scoop on the sports fixing racket. But the Bowery Boys get their tell-all story printed in headlines too soon, without photo evidence of their accusations. The newspaper gets sued for $4 million libel. "Gee, ain't that swell," says nitwit Sach, "we're libel to get $4 million!" How will they get out of this mess? Watch the movie and enjoy it. Overall, it's a bit too serious and has too much plot for your typical Bowery Boys movie. But for fans of the series, watching any of their movies is the "pinochle" of enjoyment.

Raquel Welch broke her wrist doing some of her own stunts, in this movie where action is all-important, and plot non-existent. In 1972, by her own admission, Raquel Welch was a sex goddess who hasn't turned serious actress -- and "Kansas City Bomber" changed nothing. Raquel said in an interview at the time, that when she was growing up in La Jolla, CA, she would sometimes strap on a pair of skates and clank all the way from her porch to her garage and back. When she was 7, she put the skates away and didn't skate again until a year ago when she began readying herself for "Kansas City Bomber." Raquel reported to a banked oval track built for her on a Hollywood lot, where she skated 5 hours a day for 3 months. Her tutor was famous skater Paul Rupert who skated along beside her, coaching her and teaching her the basics of 5 strides on the banked track, how to take falls (fall backwards -- if you fall forwards you could break a wrist), and everything else she needed to know.

There is almost no time for any love interest in this movie, what with the all the Roller Games and bruising grudge matches. Whatever its dramatic shortcomings, and there are many, "Kansas City Bomber" does offer Raquel looking good even in pads, some authentically seedy roller skating locales, and real heroes and villains of the banked track. Sharp-eyed fans will recognize real-life Roller Games players from the L.A. Thunderbirds: tall John Hall, and big blocker Danny "Carrot Top" Reilly; the games announcer even mentions the names of top jammer Ralphie Valladares, and Ronnie "Psycho" Rains (with a beard), and "Little" Richard Brown -- who is still skating (now in Roller Jam) almost 30 years later! The game they play is some hybrid of Roller Derby and Roller Games that does not exist in real life. It lends a surreal atmosphere which is appropriate. Raquel's nemesis on the banked track is Helena Kallianiotes, a Belly Dancer in "Head" (1968). Try suspension of disbelief, and you will enjoy this movie forever ("and forever is a long, long time!")

Censoring the Human Torch is an Urban legend. The fact is, in the mid-1970s, Marvel licensed TV rights to many of their characters to Universal for TV pilots (including Spider-Man, Hulk and Captain America). Since the Human Torch was licensed elsewhere, when Marvel made the animation deal, he couldn't be part of the Fantastic Four. The fact that he was in the first FF cartoon series (1967) and the recent one (1994) puts to rest the theory that the Torch is too hot for TV.

Bela stars in his first serial. Bela's acting is great, and the serial itself is not bad, considering it was filmed in 18 days (6 days a week for 3 weeks). The exciting titles of the 12 chapters are: 1) The Master Magician 2) The Collapsing Room 3) The All-Seeing Eye 4) The Shadow Strikes 5) Wanted for Murder 6) The Man Who Was Czar 7) The Double Room 8) The Red Circle 9) The Fatal Secret 10) The Death Warrant 11) The Trap 12) King of the World. It is interesting to note that the name of Bela's character was Adam Strang, and the main ingredient of the story was a radio death ray. Perhaps this was fodder for the science fiction writer Gardner Fox when he wrote those "Mystery in Space" comics in the 1960s, with Adam Strange and the Zeta beam! A serial that fans of Bela will find entertaining.

"The Devil's in Love" is a very interesting movie, and fans of old movies consider this a gem. A good cast and a compelling plot are highlights. This could have been just another story of intrigue in the Foreign Legion, but Bela Lugosi gives a stand-out performance as the Military Prosecutor. Although Bela had a small role (remember the famous quote: "There are no small parts, only small actors") it was a key role and pivotal to the story. The scene Bela is in is actually fairly lengthy. Whereas Bela's name is absent from the main credits, Bela's performance did not go unnoticed by his growing number of fans-- who were now becoming, pardon the pun, Legion.

Sometimes Helen Kane is listed as Betty Boop; sometimes Mae Questel (who was the voice of Betty Boop and later Olive Oyl in countless cartoons). What is known for sure is that Bela Lugosi plays the wax figure of Dracula that comes to life in a wax museum. Bela gets Betty Boop in the clinch, bends over her menacingly and sensually at the same time, and utters: "Boop! You have Booped your last boop!" This was a delight for fans of Bela, many of whom only knew him as a horror actor, and were not aware of his keen sense of humor. Also, in the wax museum, Eddie Borden's wax figure comes to life, and tells the audience about the various stars such as Clara Bow. A real time capsule.

The star of this movie is listed as Joe E. Brown, the big-mouthed (literally) comedian who looks as if he could eat a hamburger in one bite. However, stealing the scene whenever he is present, is Bela Lugosi, in a change-of-pace role considering he starred in "Dracula" earlier that year (1931). Here, Bela (a native Hungarian) is a hot-tempered South American (Pancho). When Joe E. Brown (Simpson) accidentally spurts some ink on Bela's dessert at a diner, Bela goes into a maniacal rage. So naturally, their two paths keep crossing. Later Joe E. Brown has a fender-bender with Bela's car... Bela winds up driving off with Brown's car in tow! Bela has some wonderful opportunities to show his comedic abilities. When his girlfriend asks Bela to explain a mix-up to Joe E. Brown (Simpson), Bela goes: "To Simpson-- never!" and opens his mouth wide in a mugging imitation of Joe E. Brown. A must-see movie for Bela Lugosi fans who only consider him a horror actor.