User reviews

Well, for a thriller then this 2014 movie titled "The Bone Garden" wasn't actually all that bad. Wait, at least it wasn't all that bad right up until the last quarter of the movie, then everything just fell apart. And I have to say that the last quarter of the movie totally ruined everything that writer and director Mike Gutridge had managed to accomplish up to that point. And I will actually go as far as to saying that the change of events and what happened in that last quarter of the movie was definitely some of the worst I've seen in a movie in a long, long time.

The storyline told in "The Bone Garden" was actually fairly entertaining, and it had that whole 'who did it' vibe going on, and director Mike Gutridge actually managed to make a wholehearted and entertaining movie.

But then he shot himself in both feet with what he opted for in that dreadful and ghastly last quarter. That whole plot twist was just so outrageously bad that it totally killed off the movie. It was so bad that I think it will be imprinted into my memory for a long time to come.

The acting in the movie was adequate, though it was very clear that it wasn't award-winning material that you are in for here, when you sit down to watch the 2014 movie "The Bone Garden".

Ultimately, then "The Bone Garden" is not a movie that I would recommend you waste your time, money or effort on, especially not so with that abysmal last quarter of the movie.

My rating of "The Bone Garden" lands on a mere two out of ten stars. I would have rated it a five stars actually, but then that horrible last quarter rolled on to the screen and it just knocked the movie down so hard. Of course, I am not going to ruin it by revealing what happened, you'll just have to sit down and see for yourself - or actually, you better not.

The Bone Garden is a tough film to review. On one hand, when looked at for pure cinematic value, it is dismal. It's a cheaper than cheap thriller that would make the Asylum give it a hard pass. A lot of the cast are known for their various roles in the Friday the 13th franchise and there is a reason none of them ever went any further and most have all but disappeared: they can't act. Add a completely abysmal script and kid-with-his -first-camera level directing and you have a film that no one should ever have to see. But then, on the other hand, this film is unintentionally hilarious in a way few films have been since The Room. The overacting, fhe laughable dialogue, the clueless directing and editing...by the halfway mark I was beginning to wonder if they were trying to be this bad. So, as an actual film this is a complete trash heap but as a midnight movie with a crowd that's in on the joke, it has a future.

The Bone Garden is pretty bad. I'm certain that all involved went into it with the best of intentions, but the ingredients determine the outcome despite intentions.

Tracie Savage as Alice Hardy's, world starts falling apart when a new neighbor moves in. Even in this briefest of summaries the movie lacks interest.

The acting is stilted and pedestrian across the board. The physical setting is uninspiring. The film has a mid-day made for television movie feel to it. The script by Mike Gutridge is contrived and unimaginative.

Mike Gutridge is also the director. He has two or three movies under his belt as writer / director. He seems to have hard of the maxim that doing the same things must produce the same outcome. He might look at his output with a more critical eye and see if he can avoid some of the issues which keep arising.

A site, AMC Scene, which is sort of how to make a horror movie 101 site, lists the following,

10 Elements Every Horror Film Needs

A Memorable, But Frightening Menace. ... Clear Rules to Live By. ... Plenty of Characters Who Could Disappear at Any Moment. ... The Element of Surprise. ... A Backstory That's Key to the Monster/Villain's Purpose. ... Proper Theme Music. ... The Possibility for a Sequel.

Unfortunately, Mike Gutridge doesn't really address any of these adequately.

I want my rating back. But one is the lowest number of stars available. The actors must have been desperate. Don't waste your time watching this movie. I don't know how this movie even got made, who okayed it, who invested in it? This couldn't be further from a thriller! It's a joke! An unbelievably bad joke!

I don't know where to begin. This was awful in every way. Unimaginably awful. I mean, the DP and sound guy knew their basic jobs, and they did a basic job. This wasn't even intentially bad, it was just plain inept on every level. The "twist" wasn't even uninspired, it was plain irrationally stupid. Stupid is the word, you see, because this movie doesn't deserve a more evocative adjective. I find it absolutely hilarious this guy made a movie recently which he subtitled "An Arthouse Film" because this movie was as far from creative, skillful, or artistic as you can possibly get. Everything about it was utterly basic-- as an example, the editing cut together conversations so that every time a person spoke, the camera showed them, except for a few token moments when the editor remembered you don't have to do that. Picture to yourself if the director and actors of the most inane Disney channel tween sitcom made a "thriller" with middle aged actors-- that's getting close to the joke this was.

Go watch What Lies Beneath. Then, stop. Unless you want to roll your eyes a lot. If you really want to be annoyed, watch this movie.. which takes bits and pieces of that movie and spins it into an incredibly stupid waste of time. I'm honestly not sure how the people who made this weren't sued by the creators of What Lies Beneath. Except the creators of that movie probably didn't want any parallels drawn because this one is so bad. So bad. Even copies the names at times. The main characters in WLB were Claire and her husband Norman, a professor at the local college. This main character in this isn't named Claire, but her husband is Norman a professor at the local college. Both suspected of an affair with a coed who's missing. And the lake that's a pivotal part of the plot is "Claire lake". Ha. There are neighbors in both movies that the main character suspects the husband of killing the wife. And there's a dog in both movies who frolics in a lake and stumbles upon a piece of jewelry. It's all so badly copied it's laughable. Even the best friend... A cheap ripoff of Diana Scarwid's character in WLB. There is even an almost exact conversation about a cool new car post-divorce to pick up guys in. Save yourself the hour and a half of watching this... Just watch What Lies Beneath with Michelle Pfeiffer and Harrison Ford. This movie is a joke.

Alice Hardy is a middle-aged woman living in an idyllic country town. Everything seems to be going just right until new, unfriendly neighbours move in. Now townsfolk are being murdered.

I had low expectations for this. It looked like a typical B-grade horror movie, complete with a cast and crew of unknowns and poor production values. Yet, for more than half of the movie it was quite interesting. The plot was intriguing and the characters, especially Alice and Laurie and their relationship, quite engaging. Direction was hardly brilliant but worked and the performances were fairly solid, especially considering the cast.

The plot was set for a great conclusion, with the primary suspect as to who the murderer being so obvious as to clearly having to be a be a red herring, making the identity of the actual murderer even more intriguing.

Then it all fell apart. The red herring wasn't a red herring. Not satisfied with this, writer-director Mike Gutridge then takes the plot off on a random tangent. The ending is nonsensical and massively disappointing after the potential shown for the bulk of the film. Ended pretty much how I suspected the whole film would be before I watched it.

This is like watching a movie a High School kid made for a grade, and he got a C-. It was pretty much too awful to watch but it was like a train wreck you just couldn't stop. The characters were so stiff especially the next-door neighbor when she meets him in the school and he tries to look menacing. Lol.

Reading the critic reviews, I read this movie was:

1). Crowdfunded And 2). Filmed in under a month

And, ok, when you watch a movie rated 3.2 out of 10, you get what you expect - a movie you watch to see just how bad it can really be.

It had an interesting plot, with several potential candidates for the "whodunnit" guesses.

While other reviewers wanted the main character killed off as she was boring & the nymphomaniac friend to take the lead, we found nympho outlandishly annoying & hoped she was next.

The script? One character says to the other, "Later, gator." Enough said. Actually, not enough said, but there are simply no words to describe the awfulness of it.

The ending made no sense a all. I mean, it DID, and it was obviously supposed to be a twist ending. However, there was another twist in there which they seemed to just forget about once they had filmed it.

Now, if they had taken the twist they forgot about and worked it INTO the last twist, THAT would have been a REAL twist ending and a real showstopper!

But no. Out of all of those people either no one thought of it or no one listened to the people who did.

So it was a mediocre ending to a really dire movie.

BUT!!!!! We are all used to movies with billion dollar budgets which take years to make.

Crowdfunding and ONE month.

For that, I think it was a great movie - an achievement for indie movies. Not many could manage that.

You know how sometimes you are hoping that a character ends up dead early on. That's exactly what I felt watching this movie. Unfortunately the main character rarely dies at the start. Even her insane, nymphomaniac best friend was an improvement. Needless to say I did not finish this beyond lousy movie.

What did I just watch? I took a chance and now there's an hour and a half of my life I'll never get back. Started out not too bad; typical who done it with a plot twist at the end that I could have done without; so stupid I can't believe I watched the whole thing.

I could handle the low budget at first. I could handle the so-so acting at first. Then, things just kept getting worse. And worse. And worse.

I don't understand the plot much. Men are cheaters, abusers, and occasionally nice. Women need support so they can be independent. Unless they are psychopathic. Oooooh my.

As the paper thin plot unfolds, things make less and less sense. And as people are supposed to lose themselves, acting turned to "What is the most common way we can convey that I'm a homicidal manic? Yeah, do it that way! Really over the top!" Sadly, the acting over the top is still a mediocre display of trite 1 note behaviors. Ho and a Hum.

Not worth anything really.

What an utterly ridiculous movie! I kept hoping it might become a great reveal, but no suck luck. "Does this review contain spoilers?" Yeah right. There are no spoilers to be had.

Other than this: don't start it. Don't go past "begin". Turn back. You've been warned.

The stiff, flat characters are hardly believable, and the friendship between the women is cardboard thin. The furious expression constantly worn by actor Steve Bauer as the unfriendly neighbour, Sam Myers, is probably more about the silly script.

And what's with that ending? Man ....

The only character worth watching, is Jason the Chocolate lab (played by Smokey Sinn).

Came across this by accident and liked the name, thought it might be a good(ish) thriller, maybe with a bit of horror.

NOPE!

The only horrific thing about this movie were the two main female characters. Seriously made my slappin hand itch. Such concentrated stupidity and over the top characterisation is pretty unbearable. And the acting ... don't even get me started. I guess it fit with the quality of the script though, so there's that.

There is a twist, at which point there were a couple of times I laughed out loud - but this isn't a comedy, so those unintentionally funny bits were weird and out of place.

This story was a twist on What Lies Beneath, and could have been good but... you know. It wasn't.

Final Take: try some sedatives before watching this so you can make it through the irritating first half, and don't expect much from the second half.