I Am Here... Now

This man should be arrested. Apparently it is too short to submit. So he should be arrested and sentenced to at least 10 years in prison.

This film was Neil Breen's little joke at the expense of those who didn't "get" Double Down (2005), ie that the latter was a descent-into-madness tale told from the perspective of a character who was clearly delusional at the outset. So he portrays a literal deity here and expounds everything to us.

Yes, it's a challenge just to sit through this crazy thing, and the thoughts it provokes are, What the hell? Why are there doll heads in the desert? Did that dolphin just poop? Do all the women in Las Vegas wear those spaghetti strap blouses with the two top buttons open to show their chests? Couldn't they get any actors for this? Why do they use the same scream over and over? What's with the monster mask? Why, why why am I watching this? SO MANY QUESTIONS. Writer, Producer and Director Neil Breen stars as a space Jesus who comes to Earth in a glass paperweight to check up on his failed experiment - humanity. The corrupt politicians and lying lawyers play out their efforts to hamper the development of sustainable energy systems in halting stilted monologues. Economic conditions force people into crime, dismemberment and depravity, and the space Jesus makes the bad guys bleed from their eyes for menacing a cancer patient in a wheelchair. I wouldn't be fool enough to compare this unique creation with anything else - it's created a whole new reality for itself. It's like a metaphor - FOR LIFE. I only hope we are ready when Neil Breen's glass paperweight returns once more to Earth.

This may sound hyperbolic, but I firmly believe that so-bad-it's-good may be the most difficult film style to pull off. There's a limited pool of movies that even classify for the genre, and when they happen, it seems almost by fluke. You could never make another Troll 2 or Room no matter how hard you tried. The fact that Neil Breen has been able to amass such a vast body of work without gaining any sense of self awareness is a small miracle.

Not all poorly made movies are this fun to watch either. It's just loaded with so many details that offer laugh potential in every scene. Some awful acting here, terrible dollar store props there, ridiculous and self indulgent plot developments everywhere. You should make yourself watch one of these every so often to fully appreciate just how hard film making actually is, and how much even the most mediocre, straight to Netflix garbage is actually getting right. When you see something as simple as sound editing getting screwed up, you realize just how much you've come to take for granted.

So far I'm three deep into the Breen filmography. This movie sort of pales in comparison to the undisputed masterpiece, Fateful Findings, but has a more satisfyingly coherent plot than Double Down. All three have their merits though, and I wouldn't recommend skipping any of them.

Neil Breen plays a cyborg alien Jesus in this movie and that alone is quite something isn't it? I mean, the symbolism is just off the roof in this and Breen myself gets his message out very vividly.

The Being (Neil Breen) is disappointed by its creation, the almighty being that created Man arrives on Earth in a human form and interacts with various troubled, wicked and sinful people on his journey to Vegas.

I Am Here….Now is a work of sheer breenius. It's a breathtaking thrill ride with plenty of symbolism and brilliance from the Breen.

If you haven't check this out yet, please….do.