The Muppets (2011)

Bill Barretta: Swedish Chef, Rowlf, Dr. Teeth, Pepe the Prawn, Bobo, Muppet Gary, Mahna Mahna

Photos 

Quotes 

• Rowlf : How come you didn't use me in the montage? I thought my story was pretty interesting.

  [cut to Rowlf snoring in a hammock on his porch surrounded by other Muppets] 

  Kermit the Frog : Rowlf?

  Rowlf : Huh?

  Kermit the Frog : You wanna get back together?

  Rowlf : Okay.

  [cut back to the car] 

  Rowlf : Heh heh. Classic.

• Rowlf : [singing]  An Albino.

  Sam Eagle : [singing]  A Mosquito.

  Beaker : [singing]  Mee-mee-mee-mo.

• Sam Eagle : Hello.

  Rowlf : Hello.

  Link Hogthrob : Hello.

  Beaker : Mee-Meep.

  [sees an ax in his own hands, freaks out a bit while getting rid of it to grab a hairdryer] 

  Beaker : Mee-Meep.

  Rowlf , Sam Eagle , Link Hogthrob , Beaker : Hello.

• Fozzie Moopet : Yo, what the waka, man?

• Swedish Chef : No masken?

  Miss Piggy : No Masken.

• Bobo : I love geriatric humor...

• Mahna Mahna : [sings]  Mahna Mahna

  Tex Richman : You're breaking the law! I own that name!

  Snowth , Snowth : [the Snowths sing]  Doo-doo, do-do-doo, do-do do do do do doo.

  Gonzo : [with a bowling ball]  Hey guys, I think I finally worked out how to - Whoo-ha!

  [Gonzo throws the bowling ball and hits Tex Richman] 

  Fozzie Bear : 'Oil' bet that hurt.

  [Tex Richman starts laughing] 

  The Newsman : This just in: Richman gives back Muppet theater and name. Change of heart, nothing to do with head injury.

  Tex Richman : [sings]  Mahna Mahna

  Snowth , Snowth : [the Snowths sing]  Doo-doo, do-do-doo

• Bobo : Are we working for the bad guy?

• Bobo : [singing]  Together again.

  [Deadly joins in] 

  Bobo , Uncle Deadly : Gee, it's good to be...

  Tex Richman : [cuts them off]  NO SINGING IN MY OFFICE!

• Statler : [the door opens, Statler, Waldorf, Uncle Deadly, Bobo the Bear, and Tex Richman enter the room]  There, now this here is Kermit the Frog's old office.

  Waldorf : Or so we've been 'toad'.

  [Statler and Waldorf chuckle] 

  Tex Richman : Well, as you know, gentlemen, I've loved the Muppets since I was a boy.

  Uncle Deadly , Bobo : Mm-hmm.

  Tex Richman : And what better way to honor the Muppets than to make this beautiful studio a Muppet museum.

  [Walter gasps while hiding underneath a table] 

  Tex Richman : I think I'll call this room the "Kermit the Frog's Old Office Room".

  Uncle Deadly : Oh, good one, Mr. Richman.

  Bobo : Oh, that is lovely.

  Waldorf : Now, ahem, this here is the standard "Rich and Famous" contract Kermit signed 30 years ago that contains...

  Tex Richman : The deed to this property.

  Waldorf : Exactly.

  Waldorf : Now, this contract is 100 percent iron-clad, with one minor exception: if the Muppets can raise the $10 million it would cost to buy the building before this contract expires, then they get their studio back.

  Statler : You know, if I didn't know better, I'd say you were reciting some sort of an important plot point.

  Waldorf : Well, I hope so; otherwise I just bored the audience half to death.

  Statler : You mean half the audience is still alive?

  [Statler and Waldorf chuckle] 

  Waldorf : It's nice doing business with you.

  Statler : Yes, sir. Come on.

  Waldorf : Good-bye.

  Bobo : [to Uncle Deadly]  I love geriatric humor.

• Jack Black : [sings reluctantly while still tied up]  Mahna mahna.

  Snowth , Snowth : [the Snowths sing]  Do-doo, do-doo doo

  Selena Gomez : [sings]  Mahna mahna

  Snowth , Snowth : [the Snowths sing]  Do-doo, doo-doo...

  Miss Poogy : Hey Richman! We had a deal!

  Janooce : Yeah, for reallies!

  Fozzie Moopet : Yeah, you owe us money, man. What the wocka!