- Buck: Mammals, we have ourselves a crime scene. Tuff of fur. Half-eaten carcass. Hunk of... aaugh! No! Broccoli!
- [almost throws up]
- Buck: Here's what I think happened: dinosaur attacks Sid, Sid fights back with broccoli, leaving dinosaur... a vegetable!
- Diego: Are you nuts? Sid's not violent. Or coordinated.
- Manny: Yeah, and where's the dinosaur?
- Buck: All right, good point. Theory two: Sid's eating broccoli, dinosaur eats Sid, dinosaur steps on broccoli, leaving broccoli... a vegetable!
- Diego: [to Manny, about possibly staying] This is my kind of place.
- Buck: [Pick up a rock like it's a cellphone] Hello? No... No I can't really talk right now... Going to retrive a dead sloth. No, I know. They're following ME! Yeah, and they think I'M crazy! O-Okay... We're going into the Chasm of Death, I'm going to lose you. Yeah. O-Okay.
- [quietly]
- Buck: I... I love you too. Goodbye... Goodbye!
- [throws the rock aside]
- Buck: Let's get a move on, shall we?
- Manny: [to Diego] That'll be YOU in three weeks.
- Manny: [looking at Eddie & Crash singing] Are you crazy?
- Diego: [lets go of his breath, in a squeaky voice] Its not poison!
- [surprised by his voice, he laughs hysterically with Eddie & Crash]
- Crash: [in a squeaky voice] That is Sooo Disturbing!
- Buck: [from the other side] Stop laughing! All of you!
- Crash: [in a squeaky voice, mimicking Bucks accent] Stop Laughing all of you!
- [All laugh hysterically]
- Manny: [in a squeaky voice, mimicking Bucks accent] Whats rule number 1?
- [All laugh hysterically]
- Ellie: They are just laughing, what's so bad about that?
- Buck: They died laughing!
- [points down the chasm at laughing skeletons of dinosaurs]
- Ellie: [gasps] Stop laughing!
- Manny: [in a squeaky voice] You know whats funny though? We are trying to save Sid, and now we are all gonna die!
- [all laugh hysterically]
- Eddie: [in a squeaky voice] And i don't even like Sid!
- Crash: [in a squeaky voice] Who does? He's an idiot!
- [All laugh hysterically]
- Diego: [in a squeaky voice] Thats for getting me into this mess! Its the most fun i've had in years!
- Manny: [in a squeaky voice] Thank YOU, for deserting the herd, that was totally SUPER!
- [moment of silence and then they all laugh hysterically]
- Manny: [All notice Buck above the cage trying to release it free and holding his breath, Manny begins to tickle him with his trunk] Coo chee Coo chee Coo!
- Buck: [In a normal voice] Stop That!
- [gasps]
- Buck: Don't you see?
- [in a squeaky voice]
- Buck: We are all gonna die!
- [All look at him and begin laughing hysterically including Buck]
- Ellie: [on the other side] I gotta do everything huh?
- [Ellie releases the rope and sets the cage loose]
- Eddie: [in a squeaky voice] Sometimes, i wet my bed!
- Crash: [in a squeaky voice] Thats alright, sometimes I wet your bed!
- [All Laugh hysterically]
- Manny: [the cage reaches the other side and everyone apart from Buck tumbles out breathing for air while laughing. In a normal voice] Uhhh, I'm not sure how much of that you could hear...?
- Manny: Oh i heard all of it
- Eddie: [to crash] You wet my bed?
- Crash: That was just gas talk dude.
- Sid: [to the baby dinosaur] Come on, spit him out. If you don't spit out little Johnny right now, we're leaving the playground this instant! One... two... don't make me say three...
- [the baby dinosaur spits up a bird]
- Sid: There you are. The picture of health.
- Aardvark Mom: That's not little Johnny!
- Sid: Well, it's better than nothing.
- Eddie: So, Why do they call it the Chasm of Death?
- Buck: Well, We tried big smelly crack but uh, that just made everybody giggle!
- Manny: Well now what?
- Buck: [Buck pulls on a cord and a large ribcage on a vine appears] Madam...?
- [gestures for Ellie to get on]
- Manny: Whoa! She is not doing that!
- Buck: Bup bup bup bup! Rule number 1...?
- Eddie: Ooh ooh ooh!
- [raises his hand in the air]
- Buck: Ah! Come on mammoth! You're supposed to have a good memory!
- Ellie: Always listen to Buck!
- [walks onto the rib cage]
- Buck: Now eyes forward, Back straight and
- [quietly]
- Buck: breath in the toxic fumes and you'll probably die.
- Ellie: TOXIC FUMES?
- Buck: Just another day in paradise!
- [cuts the vine to release the rib cage]
- Manny: Wait!
- Buck: GERONIMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
- Manny: [moment of silence and then sees the empty ribcage move towards them] Ellie? You okay?
- Ellie: [calling from the other side] You have to try this!
- Buck: Alright! Now Pile on everyone! Couldn't be easier!
- Buck: [the cage is stranded in the middle of the fumes] Don't panic! Just some uh technical Difficulties! Keep holding it in boys!
- Eddie: [Stops holding his breath] I cant take it anymore!
- Crash: He breathed it!
- [gasps]
- Crash: now I'm breathing it!
- [crash & eddie make choking noises]
- Eddie: [in a squeaky voice] Hey! We're not dead!
- Crash: [in a squeaky voice] You sound ridiculous!
- Eddie: [in a squeaky voice] Me? You should hear you!
- [Both laugh hard]
- Eddie: [in a squeaky voice] Alright Alright. and a one, and a two...
- Crash, Eddie: [in a squeaky voice, singing] Christmas, Christmas time is near...
- Sid: Is this how you resolve conflicts? No wonder you're single.
- [Mamma Rex roars]
- Sid: oh, that's your answer to everything. I don't exactly call that communication. I say they're vegetarian, you say "grrr". I say can we talk about it, you say "grrr". That's not what I call communication.
- Mother T-Rex: GRRRRRR!
- Sid: See that's your answer to everything!
- Manny: Oh, we need a code word. Yeah, something that says, "the baby's coming."
- Ellie: [thinks a moment] How about, "Aaah! The baby's coming!" How's that?
- Manny: Nah, too long. We need something short and punchy, like, uh... "peaches"!
- Ellie: Peaches?
- Manny: I love peaches. They're sweet and round and fuzzy, just like you.
- Ellie: You think I'm round?
- Manny: Uh... Round is good. Round is foxy!
- Manny: Sid, you're gonna have a family too someday. You're gonna meet a nice girl, with... with low standards, no real options, or sense of smell...
- Buck: [Using dinosaur skulls like they're talking using his own voice]
- [skull one]
- Buck: They'll never survive. It's dangerous out there by day.
- Buck: [skull two] And it's even worse at night.
- Buck: [skull one] Plus, their guide is a lunatic.
- Buck: [skull two] You mean Buck? He's wacko.
- Buck: I am not!
- Buck: [brings up another skull on his foot] And his feet smell.
- Buck: Oh, shut up!
- Buck: [skull on his foot] You shut up.
- [Buck grabs his foot with the skull on it]
- Manny: He's strangling his own foot.
- Ellie: Maybe we should keep going.
- Buck: [skull three] What? And give Rudy a midnight snack? Not likely.
- Buck: The skull's right. Take a load off, Manny. We'll camp here for the night. Now, who's hungry?
- Buck: [skull three] I am!
- Buck: You don't need the calories.
- Buck: [stopping Manny and the herd from moving on] Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa! Whoa! What, you-you think this is some sort of tropical getaway? You can't protect your mate, mate. What are you gonna do with those-those flimsy tusks when you run into the Beast?
- Crash: Wait. You mean there's something *bigger* than Mommy Dinosaur?
- Buck: Aye.
- Eddie: "Eye"?
- Buck: Aye aye. He's the one that gave me *this*
- [pointing to his missing eye, which is covered in a patch]
- Eddie: Whoa. He gave you that patch?
- Crash: For free? That's so cool.
- Eddie: Yeah, maybe he'll give *us* one, too!
- Ellie: [Talking about Sid being missing] This isn't your fault. It's bigger than both of us. We have to get Sid
- Manny: Yeah. But if I have been a better friend to him... we wouldn't be here.
- Buck: [interrupts] Better friend, Are you pluckin' my whiskers? You risked your life, your mate and your baby to save your buddy! Not the best husband or father... but a darn good friend!
- Diego: Whoo! My paws are burning, baby! They're burning! I gotta tip-toe. Tippy-toe. Tippy-toe.
- Ellie: Excuse me, twinkle toes! Giving birth here.
- Diego: Oh, right, sorry. You okay?
- Ellie: Am I okay? Do you know anything about childbirth?
- Diego: Not really. But Manny's coming.
- Ellie: Diego, I'm scared. Can I hold your paw?
- Diego: Yeah, of course.
- [Groans as Ellie takes paw and squeezes hard]
- Diego: Just go with the pain.
- [Ellie screams]
- Diego: It's just a contraction.
- Ellie: No!
- [Points to dinosaur and screams]
- Diego: Don't worry about a thing. You're doing fine.
- [Sees dinosaur]
- Diego: It's going great. Excuse me.
- [Bonks dinosaur on head, dinosaur grabs Diego's leg and pulls him over ledge]
- Diego: Just keep breathing!
- Ellie: Diego!
- Diego: [Pops back up holding two dinosaurs] Just breathe! That's the important thing.
- [Conks dinosaurs' heads together, and jumped by another]
- Diego: Oh!
- Ellie: You can do it! Push! Push!
- [Diego pants and lays on back as though giving birth]
- Diego: I can't do it!
- Ellie: Just one more big push!
- Diego: You have no idea what I'm going through!
- [Ellie looks at him]
- Diego: Okay, forget I said that. Let's do this together.
- [Pushes log holding back two dinosaurs over ledge]
- Diego: [Coaching Ellie in breathing] Oh, getting dizzy. Manny!
- [Helps Manny up]
- Diego: Come on, buddy I think we're getting close.
- [Baby cries]
- Buck: We're hit! We're hit! Mayday! Mayday! We're losing altitude!
- [Taps flying dinosaurs eyeball]
- Buck: Hold these!
- [Hands reins over to Crash & Eddie, and begins mouth to mouth on dinosaur]
- Buck: Oh, tastes like fish.
- Eddie: Okay. That's just weird. I love you, bro!
- Crash: I know!
- Buck: Snap out of it! Come on!
- [Punches dinosaurs nostril; dinosaur wakes up]
- Ellie: Manny! Pineapples!
- Buck: Pineapples?
- Manny: She gets cravings.
- Ellie: Pomegrantes? Grapefruits! Nectarines?
- Diego: She's ordering a fruit cocktail.
- Ellie: Come on, think! Peaches!
- Manny: Peaches? Peaches! The baby! What, what now?
- Diego: This? Not good.
- Manny: [Freaking out] The baby's coming!
- [to Crash and Eddie]
- Manny: Did you guys hear that? Cause sometimes I imagine it in my head, but...
- Crash: Can you try to hold it in?
- Ellie: Can somebody slap him for me?
- Eddie: [Slaps Crash] Done and done.
- Manny: Just sit tight. We're coming!
- Sid: [confronting a Tyrannosaurus who has come looking for her babies] Look, these are my kids! And you're gonna have to go through *me* to get them!
- Ellie: [Manny and Diego are trapped by a meat-eating plant] That's it, I'm tearing that thing out through the root.
- Buck: Do that, and it'll clamp shut forever.
- Ellie: What?
- Buck: Calm down, preggers. Don't get your trunk in a knot. I'll have them out of there before they're digested.
- Manny: Digested?
- Buck: They'll be nothing but bones in three minutes. Well, maybe five for the fat one.
- Manny: I'm not fat!
- Buck: There's only one thing to do. Possums, come with me. Manny, you stay and take care of her.
- Manny: You can't leave now! She's off the trail! What about rule number two?
- Buck: Rule number 5 says you can ignore rule number 2 if there's a female involved, or possibly a cute dog. You know, I just make up these rules as I go along.