Hotel Transylvania (2012)

Andy Samberg: Jonathan

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jonathan : Are these monsters gonna kill me?

  Dracula : Not as long as they think you're a monster.

  Jonathan : That's kinda racist.

• Jonathan : I'm Dracula, Bleh, bleh-bleh!

  Dracula : I've never said that in my life. 'Bleh, bleh-bleh.' I don't know where that comes from!

• Jonathan : Uh, can I just ask? What exactly is this place?

  Dracula : What is this place? It's a place I built, for all those monsters out there lurking in the shadows. Hiding from the persecution of human kind. A for them and their families to come to and be themselves. A void of torches, pitchforks, angry mobs. A place of peace, relaxation, and tranquility.

  Jonathan : Cool, so it's like a hotel for monsters?

  Dracula : [irritated]  Yes, exactly. A hotel for monsters, way to sum it up.

• Jonathan : Yeah, well, I was afraid your dad was gonna suck all the blood out of my body if I didn't say that.

  Dracula : I wouldn't have... No, he's right, I would have done that.

  Mavis : Dad.

  Dracula : I was wrong, Devil-chops.

• Mavis : Uhm... who is that?

  Dracula : Who was what?

  Jonathan : [groans] 

  Dracula : Oh that. That is ahh... nobody.

  Mavis : Seriously dad?

  Jonathan : Dad?

  Mavis : Yeah, I know Dracula's daughter. Everyone freaks out at first.

  Jonathan : Dracula?

• Jonathan : [on opposite sides of an airplane window]  Drac, I can't understand you!

  Dracula : What? My hands in a tan shoe?

• Dracula : [holding Jonathan and looking at Mavis]  Someone closer to your age, help plan the party.

  Mavis : [looking at Jonathan]  You're my age!

  Jonathan : Sure, oh, well, how old are you?

  Mavis : 118.

  Jonathan : 100 and...

  [Dracula elbows Jonathan in the stomach] 

  Jonathan : Yeah, I'm 121.

  Mavis : Really?

• Jonathan : Look at me, I'm a Frankenhomie!

• Mavis : You sure? It'll be fun.

  Jonathan : Ok.

• Jonathan : Whoa check out the view from up here , you can almost see all the way to Budapest .

  Mavis : Who da pest ? is that anywhere near Ha wifi ?

  Jonathan : Huh? oh you mean Hawaii , I just went to a music festival there .

  Mavis : A human music festival ?

  Jonathan : I believe so .

  Mavis : Did they shove garlic bread in your face and try to bite your toes ?

• Frankenstein : [points at Johnny]  Who is that?

  Jonathan : [whispering to Drac]  Are these monsters gonna kill me?

  Dracula : [whispering to Johnny]  Not as long as they think you're a monster.

  Jonathan : Huh? That's kinda racist.

  Dracula : We'll talk later.

  [Johnny is imitating Frank] 

  Frankenstein : [to Drac about Johnny]  Is... is he making fun of me?

  Dracula : No, no! Of course not, because he's...

  [stops Johnny from imitating] 

  Mavis : He's your cousin. Johnny-stein.

  Frankenstein : I don't have no cousin.

  Dracula : No, no, you do. He's your sixth cousin, three times removed.

  Jonathan : [holds up his right arm]  On your right arm's side.

  Frankenstein : [to his right arm]  You have a cousin?

  Dracula : Frank, if your arm can talk, it would tell you that the original owner of your arm had a brother...

  Jonathan : ...Who married a woman...

  Dracula : ...Who was...

  [makes killing gesture] 

  Jonathan : ...For strangling a pig.

  Frankenstein : I have pig strangling blood in my arm? That's kinda cool.

  [to Johnny] 

  Frankenstein : Well, Cuz, great to meetcha.

• Jonathan : [from the roof of the hotel]  Whoa check out the view from here.

  Jonathan : You can almost see all the way to Budapest.

• Jonathan : [After Mavis mispronounces Hawaii]  Huh? oh you mean Hawaii .