An unbelievably daft effort from Godfrey Ho, the king of crap ninja movies, Ninja Terminator sees Ho's regular star Richard Harrison once again donning his natty camouflage suit to fight a variety of similarly garbed bad guys, all the while performing totally unnecessary cartwheels and back-flips.
This time, Harrison plays Harry, one of a trio of good ninjas who steal a precious, magical golden statue from their evil boss. When one of the trio is killed and part of the statue is taken back, Harry enlists the help of his friend Jaguar Wong (who is a cool-as-ice, high-kicking bad-ass) to protect his dead friend's sister and try and retrieve the missing piece.
Despite the story making little or no sense for most of the running time (which is what you get when you splice together footage from two different films, as is apparently the case here), Ninja Terminator is still well worth watching thanks to countless completely insane moments guaranteed to make you howl with laughter: watch in awe as Harry proves that no melon is a match for his ninja sword skills; be puzzled as a breakfast of live crabs suddenly turns nasty; wonder why the hell Hwang Jang Lee is wearing a bad blonde wig for most of the film; giggle uncontrollably as a toy robot menacingly delivers video tapes; and then check ebay to see if you too can get a cool Garfield phone like the one Harry uses.
Amongst all this unexplainable, but very entertaining silliness, there are also plenty of pretty good martial arts fights (Jack Lam, as Jaguar Wong, is excellent and displays loads of decent moves before his inevitable battle against super-kicker Lee). Throw in a couple of gratuitous sex scenes, and some awful dialogue, and what you have is one hell of a fun film.
