Diamond Ninja Force

Basically a sequel to "Ninja Terminator" only Richard Harrison's character is now Ninja Master Gordon instead of Harry. Everything else is the same, from his wife (Maria Francesca) and the Golden Ninja/Goblin idol to the awkward scenes with the Garfield phone. This time however the Caucasian Ninja storyline is intermixed with an Asian knockoff of "Poltergeist". The Black Ninjas want a sacred piece of land that contains buried magic talismans that will restore their Clan's strength in an ongoing battle with the Diamond Ninjas that seem to be represented only by Master Gordon. The head badguy Kogan, who has the absolute WORST taste in clothing, enlists the aid of a Ghost Ninja who in actuality is the ghost woman that haunts the family in the separate movie to secure this plot which currently a family of three resides on. The family consists of George, Fanny and their dopey son Bobo. Yes, his name is actually Bobo. Kogan also employs various pasty white guys who resemble more Sears employees than Ninjas though fans of Godfrey Ho movies know that this is the norm. The two story lines don't mesh well at all (no surprise) as the poltergeist movie isn't really interesting at all even with its occasional nudity and masturbating ghost. Can't say I would complain with being haunted by an Asian woman that wanted to screw my brains out but hey that's just me. The few fight scenes in the Master Gordon story are quick, stale, and utterly goofy. It seems all of these Black Ninjas like to fondle pistols in public places during the daytime. Not smart. This is pretty bad even for a typical Godfrey Ho movie as there is little to no momentum from beginning to end and nowhere near as fun as "Ninja Terminator". Many of the scenes shot at night are so horribly underexposed that I had no clue what was going on, not that I cared. Even Richard Harrison looks incredibly bored filming this garbage. So stagnant that it should have been called Cubic Zirconia Ninja Force.