- Hudson Junior: Where will you go?
- Rosie: My nanna has kindly invited me to London town to stay with her and be a prostitute.
- Hudson Junior: You are indeed fortunate to have such an understanding family.
- Rosie: If you're ever passin', do pop in. Like her and me Mam and me sister, I hope to bear many illegitimate children into abject poverty.
- Aunt Agnes: Italy is so foreign, look at the effect it's had on poor Mr. Tweeb. I propose we go somewhere more English. The lawn please, George.
- Title card: India.
- Emily Ivory: [to George after he saves her from drowning in the lake] In fact, Cedric saved my life by shouting so bravely.
- Aunt Agnes: What is that you're reading? Show me.
- Cedric: It's the new E. M. Forster novel.
- Aunt Agnes: Oh! Not another of them! Is it amusing?
- Cedric: Why, I find it difficult to identify with the characters, but the locations are quite enchanting.
- Horace: [Seeing George wait at the table] Good grateful, he's white!
- George: Aye, that's right. I'm white. So what? All men are equal, and all women. The world is a changing place.
- Horace: I won't have an English servant in my house. Bad for the morale. It may cause the whole empire to crumble.
- George: I have my rights.
- Horace: Rights? This is not some namby-pamby suburb of London, this is the Raj!
- Emily Ivory: I hate saying goodbye.
- George: Au revoir.
- Emily Ivory: Ciao.
- George: Shalom.
- Emily Ivory: Salam alaikum.
- Horace: I wish that Cedric was more like you. He is such a queer fellow and you're always... so gay.
- Emily Ivory: Oh, Aunt Agnes, just remember: you are not losing a niece, you are gaining a man who is... awfully good at croquet and who can probably greet the wedding guests in Greek, Latin... and hieroglyphics.
- Aunt Agnes: Emily, do laugh at Mr. Trilling's witticism.
- Emily Ivory: Certainly. The moment he makes one.
- Aunt Agnes: Have you been urinating in the soup again?
- Hudson Junior: There will be worse to come, Madam, in the main course and the pudding.
- [Hudson is the last servant left, everyone else has been fired]
- Rosie: Can you manage on your own?
- Hudson Junior: I am a Hudson.
- Rosie: Do you never get bitter?
- [several bells ring; Hudson is still and silent, but his lip trembles]
- Rosie: [awed] Never?
- [she leaves. Hudson takes the soup pot and urinates in it]
- Emily Ivory: Who are you?
- George: My name's George.
- Emily Ivory: George... you have a ripping set of unmentionables!
- George: I want the hand of your niece.
- Aunt Agnes: Emily must make her own decision.
- George: So you wouldn't object?
- Aunt Agnes: I don't give a monkey's.
- Cedric: Miss Ivory, having carefully considered the advantages and disadvantages, I feel it is my duty to ask you to become my wife so that no man may say a Trilling child might be a bastard.
- Emily Ivory: Dear dear George, I'm betrothed to poor poor Cedric... No. Poor poor George, I'm betrothed to dear dear Cedric... No. Poor dear George, I'm betrothed to dear poor...
- Cedric: [on Emily] There is something about her slim, elegant figure that rather reminds me of Edward... hmmmmmm.
- [dream]
- Emily Ivory: Soon we will be man and wife.
- Cedric: Or, as the poet Homer says...
- [Emily grabs a butter knife and stabs Cedric in the skull with it]