The Brothers McMullen (1995)
Edward Burns: Barry, Finbar McMullen
Photos
Quotes
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Barry : [holds up a banana] Man is like a banana. Strong and firm, bright and phallic, and he's protected by his all-important shield. But, when a woman comes along, you know, she sees this bright phallic beast and she wants it. So, she starts peeling away your all-important shield.
[peels the banana]
Barry : First, she wants to see your romantic side, then she wants to see your passionate side, finally she wants to see your soft, caring, feminine side. She keeps peeling and peeling until you're left there buck naked, totally exposed with your balls blowing in the wind. And that's when she gets her knife, and she cuts away your manhood piece by piece until she's having your cock in her corn flakes.
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Barry McMullen : I like being a pessimist. It helps me deal with my inevitable failure.
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Barry McMullen : [after someone mentions their father] Speaking of our favorite wife beating, child abusing alcoholic, I went to the cemetery today.
Patrick : And?
Barry McMullen : And I'm happy to report that he's still dead.
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Barry McMullen : Hey, you know what, Marty? Blow me.
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Patrick : Oh, so you believe in God know? This is... this is your story?
Barry McMullen : Well, yeah. Yeah, on his good days.
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Barry McMullen : The man was the president of the United States. He's under a lot of pressure. I think he was entitled. Besides, he's screwin' around with Marilyn Monroe. I think it's a sign of a truly great individual who knows how to seize an opportunity like that.
Molly McMullen : [in disbelief] You are demented, Barry
Patrick : This is thinking. This is a thought process.
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Barry McMullen : I went down to the grave this morning.
Jack McMullen : And?
Barry McMullen : And... I'm happy to report that, uh, he's still dead.
Patrick : This is... this is funny stuff, Barry. Take it on the road, pal.
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Barry McMullen : [to Patrick] How did a fruitcake like you end up as my brother?
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Barry McMullen : [to Patrick] Listen, lover boy, we're not on Oprah talking about me and my emotions, all right?
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Marty : And meanwhile, what happened with Ann? Ann's perfect, and you go blow a relationship with her, what's with that?
Barry McMullen : Yeah, thanks for nothing with Ann. I mean, she was nothing but a pain in the ass.
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Barry McMullen : [to Audrey] Why would you agree to go on a blind date with me, if you're already engaged to this, uh, Henry the horse farmer?
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Barry McMullen : [to Patrick] I could give two shits about you and your true love.
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Barry McMullen : What are you doin'?
Patrick : [in the kitchen, gazing out of the window] Nothing.
Patrick : Let me ask you something, Barry.
[holding a dirty plate]
Patrick : What do I do now? Hm?
Barry McMullen : What are you, retarded? You wipe it off, and then you put it in the dishwasher. OK, genius?
Patrick : No. No, not the... I mean with my life.
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Jack McMullen : [reminiscing about their father] Remember some of that stuff he'd say when he was half in the bag?
Barry McMullen : [mimicking his father] You shut your mouth when you're talking to me!
Patrick McMullen : The only thing I wanna hear out of you is nothing!
Jack McMullen : And when I asked Dad how he liked my new red varsity jacket? He said 'You should get another one in blue and burn the both of em'.