Proteus

This is based on a book called 'Slimer' by Harry Adam Knight. Whilst the book is a tense, gripping and claustrophobic thriller packed with interesting characters and some truly chilling scenes, the film just stinks of a disgustingly wasted license. Another opportunity completely flushed down the drain by people not talented enough to produce and direct the home video footage of a family party.

The plot, for lack of a better word, involves drug smugglers who are shipwrecked and wind up on a deserted oil-rig where sinister experiments are taking place. After a lot of wandering around they meet a scientist with a Germanic accent which sounds nearly as realistic as Professor Tryst's in 'Dr Who:Nightmare of Eden' (which, believe me, is no great achievement). The characters are Z-grade and the film doesn't even attempt to follow the story in the original book. Before long the laughable monster (imagine a cut-price Jaws on legs) appears to sink the film to even greater depths. Doug Bradley (Pinhead in the 'Hellraiser' films) makes an appearance, but even he's wasted in a minor role as a rather cliched mad company boss.

A painful experience. That saying 'the old ones are the best' certainly applies to monster movies. Recent monster films like this waste of (very little) money aren't worth the tape they're printed on.