- Clarice Oliver: [Sharing with her attorney her concerns about Jordan] He keeps acting, pretending he's other people.
- Harold Booker, Esq.: You mean how he sometimes thinks he's Humphrey Bogart?
- Clarice Oliver: Oh, that's not so bad. The Bogart thing was a game with us. We were gay, we laughed.
- [Smiling]
- Clarice Oliver: He's be Bogart and I'd be Bacall and -
- [suddenly disturbed]
- Clarice Oliver: and then without warning he was Peter Lorre! Harold, he made me be Sydney Greenstreet. I gained 35 pounds in one month!
- Jordan Oliver: [On the couch, speaking to his psychiatrist] And if I told you I was going to kill my wife, you wouldn't call the police?
- Dr. deHart: I would not call the police, correct. I would let you kill her, and then we would talk about it at the next session.
- Jordan Oliver: And if I were to kill myself?
- Dr. deHart: Ach, that would be a different question. You would not be able to talk about it at the next session. Besides, it is a much healthier thing to kill one's wife than to kill oneself.
- Doctor Binay: [When asked if he murdered Clarice] I can't remember!
- Nurse Dagon: My master speaks the truth! He practices brain surgery and it can affect the memory.
- Jordan Oliver: How can brain surgery affect the memory?
- Doctor Binay: I practice on my own brain!
- Jordan Oliver: [after plummeting several stories because somebody cut their bedsheet rope] Oh, oooh... it's because of people like that our Blue Cross rates are going up.
- Bobo: It's a good thing the ground was here to break our fall.
- Heshy Yamamoto: Don't worry. I have great experience. Once I help, ah, deliver baby to woman in back of car and she thought I was, ah, repairing transmission of her Toyota.