Frank Sinatra credited as playing...
François Durnais
- François Durnais: Your honor, I am a member of the bar and wish to represent myself.
- Philipe Forrestier: You realize that a lawyer who represents himself is said to have a fool for a client?
- François Durnais: That may be true, but it's better than having a fool for a lawyer.
- Simone Pistache: You are a lousy lawyer and an unreliable lover!
- François Durnais: I am *not* a lousy lawyer.
- Simone Pistache: Oh, François! You'll never know how grateful I am.
- François Durnais: Yes, I will.
- Simone Pistache: Jewelry on my garter. Makes me feel - irresistible.
- François Durnais, Paul Barriere: [singing] Montmart', Montmart', Where the quail never fail to win you, Where we say Oop-la!
- François Durnais: Where are you going, Mama?
- François Durnais, Paul Barriere: Montmart', Montmart', Montmart'
- Paul Barriere: Now, now, now. Wait a minute. The Can-Can is against the law. You know that, François.
- François Durnais: You mean you don't want to see it?
- Paul Barriere: Of course I do! Who doesn't? But, a man my position. If it becomes known that I watched the Can-Can - what does the law call it: lewd and lascivious performance - what could I say? How could I defend myself?
- Philipe Forrestier: We may never get along, you and I. But, we certainly won't if you take me for a fool.
- François Durnais: I take people as I find them.
- François Durnais: [singing] When love comes in, And takes you for a spin, Oo-la, la-la, C'est magnifi-que...
- Philipe Forrestier: I've met your type: nothing in life matters, but, having a good time. I know you very well.
- François Durnais: My dear Judge, when I think of things you're missing. How wonderful...
- Philipe Forrestier: Oh, yes, yes. Wonderful, wonderful. Wine from a ladies slipper. A dawn in a strange bed. Intoxicating intrigue. Romance. Romance in gay Paris. Spare me the rest of the cliches, would you?
- François Durnais: I never thought I'd hear a Frenchman say that things are more important than Romance.
- Simone Pistache: Yes, he kissed me.
- François Durnais: Where did he kiss you?
- Simone Pistache: On the lips!
- François Durnais: No-no, I mean, in the boudoir...
- Simone Pistache: François!
- François Durnais: The biggest reason in the world today for infidelity is marriage. Now, eliminate marriage and you'll never see any such thing as an unfaithful husband.
- Simone Pistache: Oh! Oh, cut off your legs so you'll never have flat feet!
- François Durnais: Everybody does it. Why, even in France, the best upper sets do it.
- [singing]
- François Durnais: Lithuanians and Letts do it Let's do it, let's fall in love
- Simone Pistache: Oh, I've heard that before!
- François Durnais: In old Japan all the Japs do it, Up in Lapland little Laps do it, Let's do it...
- François Durnais: [singing] Though your lips are tempting, They're the wrong lips, They're not her lips, But they're such tempting lips...
- François Durnais: [singing] There's someone I'm trying so hard to forget, Don't you want to forget someone, too?
- François Durnais: I thought about murder, suicide, chronic alcoholism. But, none of those things satisfy me.
- Paul Barriere: No other schemes?
- François Durnais: Yes, one more. Forget she ever existed.