Old Mother Riley, Headmistress

"What this movie badly needs," I remarked to a colleague in the preview theatre, "are some nice girls!" And, to my surprise, shortly after, producer Harry Reynolds obliged. Following bright sequences with a girl band, a moving piano and an animated bust, came a delightful PT lesson with Pat Owens and her companions in short shorts, plus some ingenious trick effects (although the best is left for the finale when the laundry is miraculously turned into a railway station)! By the humble standards of this series, the sets are remarkably large. And they are populated by numerous extras too. Alas, the script is worse than usual, with some of the weakest puns ever, although it does offer less scope for Miss McShane (which is a blessing). In fact, her perennial boyfriend, Willer Neal, is simply allowed to disappear -- a quite unaccountable action from a continuity point of view. Presumably his later scenes where he tells Kitty the truth were mercifully left on the cutting-room floor. Even as is, the screenplay, for the most part, just isn't funny; while John Harlow's direction is as dull as his additional scenes and as flat as Jimmy Wilson's photography. Incidentally, once he'd formulated his Old Mother character, Arthur Lucan never appeared on stage without make-up, but he did make one movie, namely "Old Mother Riley's Ghosts" (1941), in which he also played the crook who disguises himself as OMR! Getting back to "Headmistress", Jimmy Wilson's camera operator was Ken Talbot; Douglas Myers was associate producer as well as supervising film editor; production manager was Stanley Couzins; make-up was in the hands of Henry Hayward and Marjorie Green; and Fred Turtle recorded the RCA sound track. Music is billed simply to "The Melachrino Organisation". Grand National state the footage as 6,786 feet (which I calculate is 75 minutes).

The writers must have gorged themselves on cheese & pickles before penning this latter-day Old Mother Riley vehicle (complete with a genuinely weird fantasy sequence featuring a talking bust, an animate piano and dancing girls).

On paper it doesn't sound too appetising, but John Harlow directs smoothly, with occasional burst wipes and a heart-shaped iris-in to keep it moving, and graceful camerawork by veteran Jimmy Wilson. The pupils include a young Pat Owens and (unbilled) the staff an even younger Katie Boyle.

The Old Mother Riley series was certainly an interesting concept. Heterosexual British males really relish dressing up in drag (Dame Edith, Monty Python, Benny Hill, etc.), and this series may well have started more modern comedians on their way. Unfortunately, the films have suffered in quality over the years, and are faded or spotty. Some that I have viewed have such poor sound quality that I lost a goodly portion of the jokes as well as the plot! "Headmistress" has survived somewhat better, probably because it was towards the end of the series, but Lucan's physical comedy has become automatic and predictable in this one. Still, if you are a lover of Brit humor, as I am, you'll find this a pleasant pasttime.

Before this viewing the only exposure I'd ever had to this long-running British MOTHER RILEY series had been 1952's MOTHER RILEY MEETS THE VAMPIRE (known in the US as MY SON, THE VAMPIRE). Well, that movie co-starred horror legend Bela Lugosi and now seems like a cinematic classic compared to this one. I had toyed with the idea of going through the whole catalogue of Mother Riley adventures, but after seeing two of them I think I'm pretty content to draw the line there. For those who don't know, the character of old hag Mother Riley was played by Irish comedian Arthur Lucan in drag. He had a long-standing act with his wife Kitty McShane, who joins him in his routine as Mother Riley's daughter(!), and it's a very odd thing to watch when you realize this. Apparently this series went on for over a dozen movies and was very popular in England, don't ask me how. In HEADMISTRESS, Old Mother Riley starts out working and blundering customers' orders at a laundromat. Then she winds up owning the establishment through a strange twist of fate, and then becomes the headmistress of an all-girls' finishing school. Despite Lucan's wild and frantic efforts in the old lady get-up, there is nothing funny here and it's quite difficult to decipher what she's saying through her heavy accent. * out of ****

Fifty years after his death behind the curtains of the Tivoli Theatre,Kingston upon Hull, whilst waiting to go on stage Arthur Lucan, born Arthur Towle in 1887 is not really remembered today. Along with wife Kitty Mcshane who was 16 when he wed her,Lucan would play Irish harridan washerwoman Old Mother Riley with Kitty as his daughter in 15 B movie comedies starting in 1937 and finishing in 1952 without wife due to separation,(her infidelity and his drinking)in the best film, Old Mother Riley Meets the Vampire, starring the great Bela Lugosi Lugosi's UK stage tour of Dracula had failed at the box office and along with Lucan who was also broke due to an ill advised venture by Kitty, teamed up with Dora Bryan replacing female interest Kitty, plus a bevy of British comic talent inc Hattie Jacques and Richard Wattis. The DVD copy of this and the lesser Headmistress 1951 is not bad. The other two releases, both again on one disc, Jungle Treasure 1952 and New Venture 1950 are poor in the sound dept. These films packed cinemas as their live act packed theatres all over the world. They topped The Royal Variety Show in 1934.The humour was very broad and perhaps has not traveled very well, but if a new audience can be found with these releases, I for one will be very happy. Bit of Trivia for movie buffs. Vampire was released as surport film to Untamed Frontier starring Joseph Cotten, Shelley Winters and Scott Brady. A really weird double bill.