The Wrong Missy (2020)

David Spade: Tim Morris

Photos 

Quotes 

• Tim Morris : [in the men's room]  Could give me a couple minutes in here?

  Missy : Oh, you do have to go to the bathroom now? Yeah, I get it. When I'm droppin' a deuce, I don't want anyone talking to me. So, have a good shit, my man...

  Tim Morris : Thank you.

  Missy : Maybe I'll take a shit, too... Mmm, don't have to... . Eh, you never know. I'll push. See you in a bit...

• Tim Morris : You should go to a spa, and then maybe, you know, like canoe out to an island and just chill, like if there's one nearby, or far.

• Missy : You're lucky I'm not the jealous type. In fact, if you want to fuckface me, I'm totally cool with it.

  Tim Morris : Fuckface you?

  Missy : Yeah, you know, if you want to imagine her face on my face when we fuck, I'm more than comfortable with that.

  Tim Morris : Well, I'm definitely not comfortable with any part of that.

• Tim Morris : How did you meet my grandmother again?

  Missy : Jiffy Lube. Yeah.

  Tim Morris : Oh.

  Missy : She's like, "My grandson would be so perfect for you." I'm like, "Sign me up!" So, yeah.

  Tim Morris : I have to visit her more often and possibly smother her.

• Tim Morris : [Airplane flight, after recovering from horse tranquilizer]  What are you doing?

  Missy : Did you not want an upsie-downsie, I'm using lotion?

• Missy : When you went to the bathroom, Aquaman started mouthing off again. So I sort of flashed him.

  Tim Morris : You flashed him your breasts?

  Missy : No, I didn't flash him my breasts. I showed him Sheila.

  Tim Morris : Like your Sheila?

  Missy : No. My friend, my protector, Sheila.

  Tim Morris : Gah! What are you, Crocodile Dundee?

  Missy : What? It's a blind date. What if you were some psycho? Then I could behead you.

• Tim Morris : [Wakes up from dreaming of having sex with one Melissa, to find out he's having sex with the other one]  Missy? What are we doing?

  Missy : Um, having sex? You kept jamming your little morning wood into my back and saying, "Oh, I want you so bad."

  [laughs] 

  Missy : Oh, you're fuckfacing me, aren't you? Cool!

  Tim Morris : No, no, I'm not! No.

  Missy : Yes, you are! Yeah, it's okay. I'm doing it to you, too, Simon Cowell. Now close your eyes and tell me I suck at singing!

  [screaming in pleasure] 

  Tim Morris : You're going to Hollywood!

• Missy : You gotta meet our neighbor, Barbara. She and her husband heard us going at it last night.

  Tim Morris : [mumbles] 

  Missy : They almost called security. They thought there was a little girl being tortured in here. You're the little girl.