- Getafix: We shall return home when I've seen the last of the druids.
- Asterix: [Snaps] Oh, I can't believe this! We've been trudging all over Gaul with our stupid little crib notes for weeks! Not one of these guys is good enough!
- Vitalstatistix: Asterix, don't get upset.
- Asterix: I am not upset! Just like you, I can stumble and fall.
- [Pretends to fall]
- Asterix: Oop! Ow! See that? I almost fell down. That's it, I'm done. I need a replacement. There. Meet my successor. The new first warrior of our village! Here's your dagger. And your helmet too and your potion.
- Geriatrix: Hmm? - What was that? But by Teutates...
- Asterix: You have a good time now. I'll be doing something else! 'Cause I'm good and fed up with the indomitables who can't see beyond their own moustaches! Obelix, are you coming?
- Obelix: No Mister Asterix I'm very much not coming! I'm not following a little man who chooses an old fogey to replace him over his so-called bestest buddy! Fare ye well, Mister Asterix!
- [Asterix is shocked over Obelix defying him and leaves]
- Vitalstatistix: Asterix, Asterix, don't be foolish! Come on! Please, Getafix, do something!
- Getafix: Asterix is free to go. My quest is not over. And if you choose not to follow me, I will understand. And I will climb up the mountain without you.
- Somniferus: [the romans are preparing for an attack] ON MY COMMAND!
- Tofungus: Centurion?
- Somniferus: What?
- Tofungus: We, just so we know, we're exhausting their magic potion supply, correct?
- Somniferus: Yes, I've explained thirty times.
- Tofungus: But, as we're building up our first attack, their stock isn't depleted yet?
- Somniferus: Indeed not. It's simple arithmetic. Should be full.
- Tofungus: Right. So then, this particular assault should go pretty much as usual, huh?
- Somniferus: Right. ON MY COMMAND! ATTACK!
- [the Romans attack and are promptly wiped out]
- Pectine: But who exactly is this Demonix?
- Atmospherix: Ah! Now, sonny, I'm very glad you asked, because I'm fond of very long stories, especially when they're laden with vocal emphasis and mysterious undertones! Demonix and Getafix were two young druids who were the admiration of their masters. Always together, working relentlessly, inventing new techniques. Demonix and Getafix were two little geniuses! I myself was beyond hopeless.
- Phantasmagorix: It's true. I remember.
- Atmospherix: So hopeless, in fact, I almost got kicked out at least four times- whatever! So, at the grand tournament, Demonix presented his flame powder, which impressed the Jury! Getafix, on the other hand, took a risk. He had chosen a magic spell that was simply beautiful, and by Belenos, beautiful it was! His spell was pure magnificense! I won't lie to you, I shed a tear, and it demonstrated great mastery of druidism!
- [Getafix shows off a powder allowing him to stack stones by magic]
- Atmospherix: After much deliberation, the jury decided that they could not reward a spell that had no practical usage. 'Lovely, but useless', they concluded, and they gave first prize to Demonix. However, Demonix never enjoyed the career he could have hoped for. His spell came in handy here and there.. and less and less... and finally not at all. While Getafix was fast becoming the most famous and respected of all the druids in Gaul, thanks to his magic potion which gives superhuman strenght, Demonix bitterly turned his back on humankind, indulging in the practises of forbidden magic. Then he disappeared, until tonight.
- Asterix: [Returns from chasing Demonix] Who was that madman? Is he a druid...
- Atmospherix: [cuts him off] I'm so very glad you asked, because I'm fond of very long stories, especially when they're laden...
- [trails off]
- Getafix: What's this, Pectine? You don't look so happy?
- Pectine: I just can't forget!
- Getafix: Can't forget what?
- Pectine: The formula for the potion! I've tried and I've tried but I just can't!
- Getafix: Do you really try your best?
- Pectine: Yes, I do! I know I'm not supposed to remember it, and I don't want to remember it, because it's much too dangerous. Only you should have that knowledge!
- Getafix: Don't worry about it, Pectine. In due time, I can promise you that you'll end up forgetting.
- Pectine: Sure?
- Getafix: Quite.
- Getafix: [Watches as Pectine runs off to play with the other kids] ... Then again...
- Demonix: Druids aren't meant to boil up veggie soups. They're meant to paint! To sing and illuminate. To prove that magic... is real!
- Asterix: [Watches the village children playing, when he's joined by Obelix] This is a disaster, Obelix. Entrusting the potion to a rookie druid with zero experience? Who says he won't misuse its power? What if he reveals the formula? That'll be the end of the indomitable Gauls, simple as that!
- Getafix: The end of the indomitable Gauls, simple as that?
- [Obelix turns around, revealing he's carrying Getafix]
- Getafix: See those kidlets playing over there? They are Gauls. We are holding out against the invader, are we not? And what about those childrens children? For them to be Gauls as well, they too will have to resist the invader. You're absolutely right, Asterix. My quest is a risky one. That's why the first warrior of the village must travel with me, to be sure I make no mistake in the choosing of this Rookie stranger of a druid with zero experience. It'll take at least the two of us.
- Tofungus: Centurion, this is all very confusing. Should we help douse the fire?
- Oursenplus: That'd be a no. It's a tad problematic, see?
- Tomcrus: I don't get it. Shouldn't we bash them when they're down?
- Oursenplus: That'd be a no. It's a tad problematic, see?
- Phantasmagorix: [Pectine is making the magic potion] Are you sure we can't help, young lady?
- Cakemix: Making potions is sort of what we do.
- Pectine: What about *magic* potion?
- Cakemix: [Steps back] Yeah, good point.
- Vitalstatistix: [Cholerix has just demonstrated his spell] I'm not an expert or anything, and sure, it's nice to look at, but... what's its use, exactly?
- Getafix: It has none... It has no use at all!
- Getafix: [gets up and approaches Cholerix] Young Cholerix, will you be my successor?
- Cholerix: ...I will.
- Demonix: You are a promising young man, Cholerix. Don't ruin everything by trying to be an honest one.
- Demonix: It's taken you all these years to realize you're not so special after all. That it's time to stand down!
- Atmospherix: Getafix is by far the best of us!
- Demonix: Better than you, indeed. But *I* was voted a better druid than he, or perhaps you've forgotten? For I would have used the magic potion, instead of defending a measly, forty-strong village of mustachioed fools. That kind of power, shared among the denizens of occupied Gaul was our one chance to topple the Roman Empire! We could have ended all wars! But our celebrated Getafix is after a good little boy who does as he's told. A model apprentice he can mold in his image. Into a selfish rogue, like himself!
- Demonix: I was confident you'd appreciate my alpine apprentice. Just the kind of limp-spirited peerage you favor. Too bad you didn't trust him in the end. Too much of a mountain billy-goat, was he?
- Getafix: Too much like his master.
- Demonix: He doesn't deserve to be your successor. Neither does anyone else, really. There's no one but me, Getafix, and you know it. Tell me the final ingredient and I'll spare everyone. The Gauls, the Romans. I'll even spare you.
- Getafix: Demonix, I would rather disappear with my formula than give it to you.
- Demonix: ...So be it.
- Legionnaire: [the first roman assault has been beaten back] Score check. We made them use up some of their magic potion?
- Somniferus: Affirmative
- Legionnaire: So then, mission accomplished?
- Somniferus: In such a big way.
- Tofungus: So, here's to a job well done. Bravo...
- Pectine: [Cholerix is preparing the potion while Demonix observes] Wait, wait, you can't! He mustn't see you doing it!
- Cholerix: I'm trying to save the village!
- Demonix: Calm down, little girl, I'm almost done here.
- [inspects the potion]
- Demonix: What an interesting formula, yet so simple. Could it possibly be missing... a final ingredient! *The* final ingredient!
- Cholerix: What final ingredient?
- Demonix: The final ingredient to the magic potion! What is it?
- Cholerix: He didn't tell me anything about that!
- Demonix: How could you not know Getafix has a final ingredient for the potion which he mixes in at the last minute? Did he not mention it? You are such a fool! It means he didn't trust you!
- [starts digging through the bag of ingredients]
- Demonix: Getafix must have gathered it! What's left in the bag? Something you haven't put in the pot! Could it be this? Or this? Yes, for sure, it must be this! By Teutates it has to be in here somewhere!
- [starts throwing in ingredients at random]
- Demonix: What could that old maniac possibly stick in this blasted potion?
- [stares at the now ruined potion]
- Demonix: ...You ruined it on purpose, you treacherous imp!
- [attacks Cholerix]
- Geriatrix: [Eavedropping outside Getafix's house with the rest of the village behind him] They're talking about a recipe!
- Unhygienix: A recipe?
- Fulliautomatix: Would this be an apple recipe?
- Cacofonix: An apple strudle, perhaps?
- Impedimenta: Ah, shut it!
- Mme Agecanonix: You did say recipe?
- Geriatrix: Yes, I did say recipe!
- Impedimenta: Why would they lock themselves up in there just to cook up an apple pie?
- Mme Agecanonix: Are you sure that's what they said, sugardove?
- Unhygienix: [mocking] Are you sure you're not deaf as a doornail, sugardove?
- [Mrs. Geriatrix slaps him]
- Unhygienix: I cannot strike a woman.
- [Mrs, Geriatrix slaps him again]
- Unhygienix: Let alone if she's married to a doornail.
- Geriatrix: [throws his cane at Unhygienix and lunges at him] Here's your doornail!
- [the entire village begins to fight]
- Unhygienix: [Trying to make a potion] So I'll pour this stuff into that stuff...
- Fulliautomatix: What are you adding that for? The same thing happens every time.
- Unhygienix: It's different now! ..This stuff into that stuff, and after that I count to ten, slowly, and if it hasn't exploded, we're safe! It's not going to blow. Ready?
- [adds one drop]
- Unhygienix: ....One...
- [it explodes]
- Cholerix: [Shows Demonix his spell for separating mistletoe berries] ... You're not that convinced, are you?
- Demonix: I am. It's not bad. Not bad at all.
- Cholerix: Not bad, but...?
- Demonix: But it's conventional. No bright lights, no flourish. The Getafix I know will not come this far for some potion that sorts out mistletoe berries, convenient as it may be. It is Getafix we're talking about.
- Cholerix: I thought you said you'd never met him in your life...?
- Demonix: *No one* knows him better than I.
- Demonix: [Asterix has been captured by Roman guards and brought to Demonix] Well, what have we here? A Gaulish warrior.
- Asterix: What are you plotting now, Demonix?
- Demonix: Plotting? Really, that's a bit much. I'm just a old friend of Getafix's, modestly doing his bit to help him in his quest for a successor.
- Asterix: You want to steal the formula and sell it to the Romans!
- Demonix: This time, it's the Romans. That's where the money is. What matters to me most is that this potion may serve the interest of the many, to bring balance to the forces. I am but a pacifist.
- Asterix: You are the worst of all the druids in Gaul!
- Demonix: No! There's another much worse than I. One who shamelessly hoards his magic for his own tribe of provincial, belligerant hicks, instead of rescuing all his people from the opressors!
- Asterix: Don't be ridiculous! If the power of the potion fell into the wrong hands, who knows what would happen?
- Demonix: Rejoice. Your question will soon be answered.
- Redbeard: [Unhygienix and Fulliautomatix get into an fight about Unhygienix trying to be a druid] Gentlemen, gentlemen, please! Let's be reasonable!
- Pegleg: Really, it's not worth a fight!
- Redbeard: Can we offer you some light refreshments?
- Pegleg: Winum drinkum calmus doofus?
- Redbeard: [Warily] Wouldn't go there if I were you, but I do implore you to keep your cool.
- Fulliautomatix: [pause] It's true, I get worked up easy. After all, if you want to druid around, I can't stop you.
- Unhygienix: [Sits down and tosses some ingredients into his cauldron] Well, you know, maybe you're right. I never get anything with all this mixing. Nothing ever does the-
- [the cauldron explodes, destroying the pirate ship]
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By what name was Asterix: The Secret of the Magic Potion (2018) officially released in India in English?
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