Keeping Up with Kiara Mia

I bought and watched this video as a fan of Kiara Mia. She unwisely chose the repellent format of the "porn-parody" for her entry into production/direction and merely demonstrates that she's not ready to graduate from performing for the Adult cameras.

In fact this baby sat on the shelf for over two years, completed in Summer 2013 until being dumped in the market last fall.

Kiara cast herself as the Kim Kardashian lookalike - I find Ms. Mia more attractive but that's not the point. Riding on KK's coattails is par for the course in "parody" = ripoff, and she's directed a dull, unarousing video.

Most of the effort is put on fashion with Kiara and her two sexy sisters (Allison Moore and Yurizan Beltran) shopping and showing off their fancy shoes, dresses and of course bodies underneath. Some sexy fashion photography with the gals covering their breasts chastely with their hands like in the good old pre-porn days is probably the highlight of this show.

But it is XXX porn after all, and the mechanical sex is deadly dull and not invigorating. As their mom Veronica Avluv brings her usual enthusiasm and professional verve to her sex scene with a bored Richie Calhoun and emerges unscathed.

Alli Moore is stuck with Lexington Steele supposedly in the basketball hubby Lamar role, though he is strictly tired old Lex, his routine trite after seeing it a thousand times (probably more) ending in the usual fake grunting and exclamatory money shot.

Beltran, who has changed her stage name recently -most unusual career gimmick, goes lesbo instead with guest star Andy San Dimas, a very talented actress who should get a new agent. They work on Seth Gamble together for a threesome.

Finale is pure anti-climax, as Kiara pointlessly dips into a variation on the popular but repellent cuckold bag. It isn't the hubby who's the humiliation figure but rather the old boy-friend, playing off the Ray J to Kanye West transition. Nonentity John Johnson lies there unconscious while Kiara humps big-dicked Flash Brown, but Kiara has herself photographed unflatteringly -she for once looked a whole lot better with her clothes on. As a fan, I will have to stick to arm's-length Adult productions to see Ms. Mia at her best.

Marcus London produced this ill-advised feature, another Adult industry figure I greatly admire, but who's also not quite ready to Peter Principle his way to transitioning behind the cameras.