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4/10
Guilty Pleasures
15 March 2008
Who thought the world needed a sequel to the original "Happy Hooker" film? Was the first one really that popular? Guess you had to be there. History tells us this movie was made at the tail end of the sexual revolution, ground zero in the disco era, and it shows--I can't imagine anyone being shocked by this turkey. It's also a true bridge between the first film, which was sexless TV-movie camp, and the third one, which was mindlessly dull soft-core.

Xaviera Hollander, famous hooker and now magazine magnate (oh sure) gets summoned to Washington for a trial about indecency involving...well, does it really matter? I've seen this film about 20 times since I was a kid and it would play on cable and I still couldn't tell you what it's "about." The first half is best and I usually turn it off about the time Xaviera gets kidnapped by Billy Barty (don't ask). The draw of the first half makes it all worthwhile to me, it's just berserk: Rip Taylor screaming and throwing fake snow around while photographing a topless extra from "Jesus Christ Superstar." Joey Heatherton looking beautiful and probably stoned out of her gourd, trying to act sexy and free but appearing a tad confused as to what she's accomplishing by being in this film (doesn't look like it helped her career much). A host of has-been 50's and 60's TV stars with bloodshot eyes doing cameos (Ray Walston? George Hamilton??). Bad 70's costumes and set designs, strange editing/foleying choices and enough teen-age-humor sex puns to fill a blow-up sex doll. Which is not to say it isn't entertaining--it is, I still laugh at the commercial parodies and the ding-bat sexpot stenographer who has trouble spelling a certain very naughty word (by the way...DO you hyphenate it, I wonder?)

But it's not sexy, just fyi. Despite a preponderance of exposed breasts, it's very like the first film, all innocent fun, the sex is at the level of a geeky teenager, which I was when I saw this, so it suited me fine. The second half is dull and disjointed; Xaviera has to seduce a stereo-typed Middle Eastern character and everything falls apart--they either ran out of money or everyone was zonked on drugs by the time they wrapped shooting. It just literally runs out of steam and simply stops at about the 90 minute mark.

I will always have a fond place in my heart (or somewhere) for Xaviera and her filmed exploits and so I'm glad this dumb film exists, but if you want titillation or even good exploitation you'll have to keep looking. Oh, and the new DVD transfer is absolutely stunning--talk about polishing a...well, never-mind...
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