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Red Zone Cuba (1966)
1/10
A horrible, horrible, horrible movie. Why do I love it so?
25 June 2001
In the prologue of "Night Train to Mundo Fine," a reporter named Jim Benton (Bruce Love) from "The Gazette" interviews Mr. Wilson (John Carradine), a train engineer, about the time three criminals hopped a train he was working on four years ago, in 1961.

After Carradine sings the title song (not a bad track), we journey to 1961. We witness Griffin (Coleman Francis) escape from prison. He meets two ex-convicts, Landis (Tony Cardoza) and Cook (Harold Saunders). Together, they decide to join a group of government sponsored mercenaries and invade Cuba for $2,000 each.

Hiring pilot Cherokee Jack (George Prince) to take them from New Mexico to somewhere near Cuba, they sign up with the group, headed by Joe (John Morrison) and Bayiev Chastain (Tom Hanson), the latter of whom wants to overthrow Castro so that his grandparents can get their sugar mill back.

The invasion goes haywire and all are captured; Chastain is shot in the leg, and Griffin says that within 24 hours he will die of gangrene. Joe and several soldiers are executed. The three criminals escape, but not before learning about the tungsten and pitchblende that is located on a mountain near Chastain's home.

In Arizona, they throw restaurateur Cliff Weismeyer (Charles Harter) down a well, leaving his blind daughter (Elaine Gibford) and stealing his car. They eventually ditch it and hop the train. They get off the train. Griffin and Landis fight for possession of Landis's ring, given to him by his father; Griffin wins and uses it to buy another car.

They reach Chastain's home, where they meet his wife Ruby (Lanell Cado). Together, the four conspire to raid the mountain. However, the criminals are spotted. Cook and Landis are arrested. Griffin shoots Ruby and flees. Chastain shows up, somehow surviving and escaping, and takes his wife back home. Griffin is gunned down by cops, who find that "Griffin ran all the way to Hell, with a penny and a broken cigarette." End.

WOW! This is one horrible movie! The only redeeming factors are the music (pretty good) and Tom Hanson's performance, which he actually tried to invest dimension into. The script, the other performances, the editing, etc, etc...all are bad.

And yet, I love this film. Why? Is it because of the witty remarks of Tom Servo, Mike Nelson, and Crow T. Robot when they viewed it on "Mystery Science Theater 3000" under the title "Red Zone Cuba?" Or perhaps because of some mysterious quality of the film itself? I don't know. I just know I love it.

And I'd love to see a remake.
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