Bermuda Tentacles

A cheesy, Bermuda-set science fiction film from The Asylum, and shown by the SyFy Channel - an unholy combination of production forces. This one's clearly inspired by/ripping off BATTLESHIP, and like BATTLESHIP, it's a CGI-fuelled mess of a film, about the crew of a warship who are attempting to extract the President from his watery grave after Air Force One crashes into the Bermuda Triangle.

The rubbish writing is the worst thing about this non-starter of a film, that and the repetitive structure of the narrative. It's an entirely clichéd piece full of lame CGI effects of alien tentacles waving about and a few silly scenes of characters exploring an alien ship which seem to be indebted to PROMETHEUS. It's noisy, vapid, and dull. The familiar faces they've roped along for this one include THE TERMINATOR's Linda Hamilton (considerably aged), SCREAM's Jamie Kennedy (unrecognisably bearded), and ALIENS's Ricco Ross (barely in it). Unsurprisingly, it's as boring to watch as your usual Asylum effort.