I'm always digging for b-horror movies, it's one of the great things on the world wide web. That said, the filmmakers on the set of "Aleta: Empress Vampire" seemed to have low expectations in the audience they would attract.
10 minutes into this simple yet over explained plot, I felt like an idiot for hitting 'play'. I just thought the idea of mixing some Chinese history into the cliche vampire story could be interesting and if all else failed at least there were boobs ( the boobs were the sole reason I gave it 2 stars instead of 1, judge me if you want but look where you are, why are you reading this?).
Writing wise, there was only one moment in the movie, during Aleta's backstory, where I thought 'interesting', the rest I just felt disrespected as an audience member. Here's my list of technical issues I found too distracting to stay focused; the camera man has clearly never watched a movie or tv (nor the director for that matter), most of the special effects were obviously added in post, there were no sound effects just whatever the mic picked up, the fake accents were really bad and completely unnecessary, the acting is pretty much what you would expect...I could go on but I wouldn't want to spoil all the "fun".
The things the director seemed to care about didn't make any sense and the things the director should have cared about he didn't at all because the audience will probably be too dumb to notice. I guess the issue is on my side of the screen because I know how the laces in my shoes work and I don't drool when I talk.
If they tried to make this funny it could have worked, there were some unintentionally funny moments that made me wish the "filmmakers" didn't take themselves so seriously. I find it hard to believe that everybody behind the camera was proud of this one.
That's my honest opinion, I'm not going to tell you what to do.
Watched on tubiTV, 2019.
