I actually had the miserable distinction of seeing TRANSYLVANIA 65000 in a movie theater whenever in god's name it was released, and bear the scars of the experience to this day. Mind you it was a date movie, but it was a lousy date, If I remember correctly we ended up in a diner eating grilled cheese and talking about what a crummy, awful movie it was, and never went out again. I used to refer to Geena Davis' voluptuous female vampire character as the best thing about the film but in reality there was no best thing about TRANSYLVANIA 65000 except it's coming to an end.
Since I don't speak a word of Italian I can only surmise what the story going on here is, and will instead comment on what there is to be seen. This looks like another one of those gonzo European horror comedies like THE THRILLING VAMPIRES OF VOGEL, "Mama Dracula" or FRANKENSTEIN'S GREAT AUNT TILLIE, which is actually from Mexico but who cares: They are dreadful, awful movies perhaps redeemed by some T&A or exploitation, but never rising to the challenge of genuinely amusing horror comedies like MALENKA, THE VAMPIRE HAPPENING or THE FEARLESS VAMPIRE KILLERS -- a movie that I actually despise, by the way. Great cinematography, but aside from Sharon Tate necrophiles, what does it really have to offer other than a guy riding a coffin like a sled? So here we have more of the same, with a bunch of "foreigners" running around on dressed up would be schlock horror movie sets, jabbering and waving their arms and having all sorts of collisions, de-panting scenes and visual jokes about breasts. Upon reading the plot synopsis provided by a generously hearted Italian speaking contributor we learn this is actually a take-off on the Dracula fable itself (meek real estate flunky dispatched to Transylvania to arrange the sale of a house with a vampire count) played by wacky old men in funny looking suits who have a hell of a lot more physical energy than anyone I know of that age. The most recognizable name/face in the cast is the always mousy Edward Purdom -- a marvelous character actor capable of almost any kind of role be it comedy, action, horror or even Westerns -- who seems to be enjoying having a turn as Count Dracula.
But the star of the movie is one Paolo Villaggio, who from what I gather is sort if Italy's answer to Benny Hill or Rodney Dangerfield: A physical comedian who's hijinx usually involve his face coming into near contact with the partially bared breasts of 20 year old supporting actresses who are 40 years younger than he was. It's always some sort of a misunderstanding or mistake rather than a leering Benny Hill double en-trade, and Villaggio apparently made a name for his shtick in a dozen or so comedies with more or less the same recurring character seen here. Affable, hyperactive middle class schnook caught up in circumstances beyond his ability to control, and his befuddlement at having vampires rise from their crypts or Frankenstein's monster tearing down a door is supposed to be the joke.
It's mildly amusing I guess: Of additional interest is the presence of Euro Horror icon Paul Muller, playing the usual Paul Muller role of the disgruntled cheezed-off authority figure, and ROBOWAR's Romano Puppo, here schlepped up in what's actually a very passable cartoon like representation of a Frankenstein monster ala Boris Karloff: He is huge and was a good enough actor to emote with his eyes to have a dialog free role still work for him. One of the movie's running gags has him constantly pawing at the gorgeous hot vampire countess played by Ania Pieroni, who may be the best thing about the movie though I have said something to that extent before about another movie. She is smashingly costumed and while the film lacks any kind of nudity it's always good to see an actress who can find the inner slut inside of a woman who has been stone cold dead in a grave for 300 years.
5/5
