Wow.
The premise is unquestionably ridiculous, yet somehow I found myself watching this - and the movie in its entirety is even more absurd than I had imagined. At the same time, there's no mistaking that it's genuinely made for a family audience, and every aspect of the film leans heavily into that flavor with no greater aspiration than to be fun. 'Crimes of fashion' is actually pretty entertaining.
First, just consider the cast: Kaley Cuoco, a few years before she started making waves as Penny in 'The big bang theory,' as fashion student turned mob boss Brooke. Megan Fox, before she found fame as a boiling love interest in Michael Bay's 'Transformers' films, here as a conniving rival student. And even more surprising, Tim Rozon, oddly fresh-faced and hamming it up as a college boy Don Juan, a sharp contrast to the surly, complicated visage of Doc Holliday in 'Wynonna Earp.' I'm less familiar with Dominic Chianese, here portraying consigliere extraordinaire George, but his warmth and charm is palpable.
I have to admit, I'd be deeply curious to see Cuoco in a serious dramatic role as a crime lord. I just want to know what that would be like.
The narrative here is built on elements of romantic comedies, high school or college dramas, and screwball comedies zeroed in on the mob. Incredibly ham-handed as the plot is - to the point of some scenes being altogether cringe-worthy - it's written well, and solid. No one is going to confuse 'Crimes of fashion' for an award-worthy must-see, but this movie knows exactly what it wants to be, and sells it. Writer David Mickel knew what he was doing.
The picture is focused on fashion, of course, and the wardrobe and costume design definitely reflects it. Hats off to Laurie Drew, Natasha Atkinson, and Jozie Conte, whose work to this end is essential to the film.
To highlight a scant few is hardly to say that anyone in the cast or crew is a slouch, though. While ABC Family has a particular reputation about their features, and it's not undeserved, any potential viewer should already well know what they're getting into, so it's hardly worth raising a fuss. And the fact of the matter is, however blunt and lacking in nuance, this is a well-made movie.
'Crimes of fashion' is witheringly cheesy, with story beats that could have been plucked out of countless other movies. It doesn't care, though, because in the end the only goal with this feature is to have fun, and in that, it succeeds handily. The right audience for this is the one that appreciates inelegant, over the top stories, no matter the genre, and if that describes you, then this is really quite worth watching.
