Actually, I was almost half awake...almost.
First, the basics. This is an Australian movie, made in 1990, and it stars Linda Blair and several people you've never seen before or since. The plot involves a doctor who indulges in malpractice for reasons that aren't disclosed, and the nurse who stops him and becomes a hero(ine).
Now, the nitpicking. This is a silly movie, and I had several bones to pick. First--judging by this film, only topless women develop mental illness. A vast majority of the nuts in this film are women, and for some reason they aren't allowed to wear clothes. The men wear pajama-like things, but the women just bare it all. I'm not really clear on why that is--all I can figure is that the director wanted to look at boobs. Makes sense, I guess.
Second--who wrote this?!? I know it was in the credits, but who watches credits? Periodically it seems like a moderately good TV movie, and then it just sinks like a rock. Example--when Linda Blair's personified conscience (she's some kind of muckraker, I suppose) gets angry at Linda, she lets loose with the "f-word" and just generally tells poor Linda off. Since projectile vomiting isn't an option, Linda has to defend herself with words. The words the screenwriter gave her are "For someone with no credentials you sure are --pause-- obnoxious." EXCUSE ME? I thought it was terribly funny, but is it supposed to be? The pause made it even better--Linda Blair is a marvelous pauser. Still, what could have been a great dramatic moment falls flat on its butt.
Third--all the people were people you would never want to meet. Ever. The head nurse is a twit, the head doctor (the bad guy) is a twit, Linda Blair comes near twit-ness occasionally, and the muckraker is certainly aggravating. How can you feel for these people when they're such creeps? I believe you're only supposed to like Ms. Blair--that's how it seems to me. I feel sorry for her, being the only protagonist in a movie full of jerks. Correction--in a stupid movie full of jerks.
Now, I can't be too hard on this movie, because I'm a Linda Blair fan and I wouldn't want people to think all of her movies suck. (Some don't, you know.) There were some good moments--when Linda's roommate gets all over her for not having a job, she gives her the Linda Blair P***ed-Off Look, which is priceless. It's just a mean stare, but it packs a wallop. I also enjoyed hearing simplified medical jargon--"The eyes are discolored, which indicates kidney failure" kind of stuff. I even liked the end of the movie, where Linda and Doctor Meanie get in a catfight. I was glad to see her dadgum fingernails make it into a scene. Every time I see her in movies she's got extremely long talons, but they don't seem to serve any purpose. They do here, lemme tell ya. (Example--"Airport 1975," where you get a close up of these long, purple fingernails, only to see them attached to the fingers of a chubby-faced girl. It's startling.)
Overall rating--2 out of 5 stars. Linda Blair, if you ever read this, PLEASE DO A COMEDY SO WE DON'T HAVE TO WATCH YOU SUFFER.
