White Elephant

I suspect this was actually written by a 12-year-old and some of his buddies. It was comically bad from the start. I never saw so many people get wasted while standing around jabbering with someone with a gun while they themselves had guns hanging at their sides as if they had no idea what was about to happen. And then there were the gunfights in the middle of the night in residential areas that apparently had been evacuated.

You never really know what the motivation is for any of it, and poor Bruce Willis is so stiff it's sad to see. I guess they got him for the name recognition, but they could have used literally any older actor for his part - or merely grabbed someone off the street and fed him lines the way they likely fed them to Bruce.

Malkovich has become one of those actors whose movies you want to avoid, as I haven't seen him in anything good for some time, and he pretty much plays the same part in all of his later films. Olga K. Is also an actress who, while nice to look at, typically only plays in dogs.

But I did give this a four because I think it has some entertainment value as a comedy, as I was laughing out loud through parts, and it definitely isn't short on action. It's nothing more than a time waster, but I've wasted time watching worse.