The contender ship for my worst movie of 2005 was poised on a knife edge between two truly appalling movies. Deuce Bigalow and Alone In The Dark. It truly was going to be a tough one to decide between a bad comedy, and a bad horror film, both are two evils that take some effort (or cocaine) to pull off.
However that debate is now finally settled. Because thanks to RnB star, Usher Raymond, or better just known as Usher, we now know which out of those two movies will win my award for worst movie of 2005.
Neither.
In The Mix, Usher's screen debut is a movie that I will only ever watch again if stapled to the floor with a gun pointed into my head and my eyelids forced open. Bar Gigli, it is the worst pop star movie ever created on this earth and gives some of my top ten all time worst a damn good run for their money.
As I told you in my review of Gigli, Pop stars can not act. There's a whole shelf on Blockbuster Video chock-full of evidence of this. And in this case, this is not just any old pop star we are talking about folks. This is the dark world known as Usher, a man whose entire CV is living testimony to the fact that talent, quality and decency are not needed to become famous on this earth.
So it's now time to ask John Raymond (the director of this joke) the £1m question. "What in the sweet blue living hell were you smoking when you allowed Usher not just to act in this movie, but be an EXECUTIVE PRODUCER in it also?" OK, so even if Usher wasn't on this team the movie would still suck anyway but we really need to draw the line at Pop Stars directing their own dreadful movies as well as acting.
And speaking of the acting and role play. Lifeless, and so unbelievably stereotypical and unoriginal that it actually features a gangster CALLED Fat Toni! Where's Normski when you need him! It's boring, poorly conceived and just plain painful to look at and suffer.
But what I hate the most about this movie, is the same thing I hate about all of these type of movies. Self Indulgence. It's bad enough with the likes of Carey and J'Lo pushing these vanity projects just to make some more cash, but when the celebrity is as truly awful as Usher is it's beyond hate. It's vitriolic rage.
If you must watch this trash, please, please find some way of doing so for free. Even if your intent is to heckle it, make sure that you don't give either a cinema ticket booth or a DVD retailer even dime. Because your money is going to Usher. And if you in any way knowingly give your money to this talentless imbecile, then you are a dead set moron. Better still.....
Don't watch this film.
PS: To those who gave it good reviews. Get A Life.
