Private Gold 57: Big Member

Barbara Brown is a credit for writing slapped on scores of Private videos a decade or two ago, and the mysterious, perhaps ficticious, lady outdoes herself with the story idea and script for Antonio Adamo's screwy "Big Member".

That title pun is actually funny, as it refers to "Big Member Is Watching You", a riff on George Orwell's brilliant dystopian novel "1984". The sci-fi porn story is set 1000 years in the future, with Mick Blue an unlikely scientist hero named not surprisingly John Thomas, playing his role bug-eyed and adequately dubbed in English -the cast articulating in English but post-synced with more intelligible voices, some of them bearing British accents.

In this future society everyone is forced to take a daily Bliss tablet, which lowers the sex drive and helps keep the populace under control in a totalitarian state. Bob Terminator, a utility infielder of a porn stud in hundreds of Euro productions, is Big Member, his kisser plastered on posters everywhere. Mick later informs us that Big Member was formerly the king of this country named Felatia, and after warring with rebel factions hit upon the anti-sex formula to rule.

Mick and lovely Nicol do some rebelling of their own, by no longer ingesting the mandatory daily requirement of Bliss, and aiming to undercut Big Member's power by waking up his Brother played by superstud David Perry. The method -they employ sexy Rita Faltoyano, whose breasts bring Dave out of his stupor and some heavy duty humping is the result. Terminator as Big Member catches Brother in the act, and this being porn joins in for a threesome and the mandatroy (in a Euro production) d.p. Action.

Happy ending is remarkably upbeat for the genre, as Big Member turns over a new leaf, ending the use of Bliss and bringing back sex as the national pastime. Terminator even gets to say the movie's final line, an amusing one at that.