La dernière maison sur la plage

A group of pretty, female Catholic school girls and their teacher, Sister Cristina (Florinda Bolkan), are terrorised by a trio of armed bank robbers (Ray Lovelock, Flavio Andreini and Stefano Cedrati) who opt to hideout in the beach-front property where the girls are studying (when they're not sunbathing topless by the pool).

Franco Prosperi's Last House On The Beach is, rather unsurprisingly, another Italian rip-off of Wes Craven's Last House On The Left, which wouldn't bother me one bit if only it wasn't such a tame affair, the director clearly wanting to disturb, but reluctant to get his hands dirty when necessary.

Rather than wallowing in the depravity that such films demand, Prosperi merely dips his toe in, withdrawing quickly whenever things start to get interesting. The rape scenes are extremely mild, the murders are tepid, and the power of the film's most extreme scene—the fatal penetration of a young woman by a large piece of wood—is severely diluted by a laughable POV shot of the leering thug brandishing the weapon.

I'm not saying that the film has to show every last graphic detail to be a complete success, but for the audience to be 'on board' with the revenge part of the film, they must first be shocked by the abuse suffered by the victims—and Prosperi repeatedly fails to do so.

4/10, bumped up to 5 for the song that sounds suspiciously like Roxy Music's 'Let's Stick Together', but with different lyrics, and for the scene in which the thugs watch my favourite part of dodgy giallo 'Eyes Behind The Wall' on telly (if you're given the choice, watch that film instead).