I've come to realize that I say this every so often, but this has got to be one of the weirdest, most incoherent and senseless movies ever made. You never know what to expect with a Shaw Bros production, but this "Amazons against Supermen" is like a mixture between dumb and brilliant. The opening credits already illustrate a collage of exciting and spectacular Superhero action guided by a rhythmic and catchy tune. This promptly sets the right mood, of course, but I've seen enough bad movies to know that promising credits unfortunately aren't a guarantee to steady entertainment. After that follows a long – but still fun enough – sequence showing some sort of gladiator tournament inside the barriers of an Amazon tribe. They have ingenious contests like archery dueling on stilts (!) and mud catch. Although you can tell all this footage is irrelevant and pointless, it nevertheless remains amusing to watch. Then it's time for the extended introduction of the three multicultural supermen. There's the enormous black guy who doesn't like to be interrupted when he's eating, the Asian expert in martial arts and a vainglorious white kid who has a throne in between two mountains and enjoys making loops when he jumps. The amazons intend to subject a whole village of poor suckers to slavery, but they're already under the "protection" of the aforementioned gay superhero. Even though the earlier sequences during the tournament raise the impression of being a serious and hardcore "action" movie, with bloodshed and sleaze, the tone and choreography of the later fight sequences tends towards slapstick. The seemingly improvised script comes up with the most bizarre stuff (Amazon women only go to war when the moon is full?) and the acting performances go from simply bad to downright insufferable. The only scenes that are properly acted are the romantic bits between the black superhero and the local school teacher (who just happens to be the only black girl in town). In fact, those parts were so believable that I assume these people where really in love. "Amazons versus Supermen" comes with a valuable morality lesson: it requires multiple interracial supermen to defeat a small army of aggressive women in bikini, so next time you get into an argument with your wife, don't even think for one second you stand a chance.
